H  A  R  R  r      M  *    &   V   f    R    £ 


LOOKING 
BACK  FROM  BEULAH 

BY 
MRS.  MOLLIE  ALMA  WHITE 

ON  THE  OVERRULING  AND  FORMING  HAND  OP  GOD  IN  THE  POVERTY  AND 
STRUGGLES  OF  CHILDHOOD,  AND  THE  HARDSHIPS  OF 
LATER  TEARS;  THE  BATTLES,  VIC- 
TORIES AND  JO?S  OF 

THE  SANCTIFIED  LIFE 

THE  DISCOVERY  OF  THE  PATH  THAT  LED  TO  IT.   THE  APOSTASY  OF  THE 

MODERN  CHURCH,  WITH  SCRIPTURAL  SUBJECTS  AND 

COMMENTS.    PENTECOSTAL  WORK. 

"Ask  for  the  old  paths,  where  is  the  good  way,  and  walk 
therein  and  ye  shall  find  rest  for  your  souls.  —Jer.  6:16. 


And  I  saw  the  denominations— great  multitudes— in  the  wilder- 
ness of  this  world  pitifuly  confused  in  the  way.  Inordinate  de- 
sires, "the  lust  of  the  fleslh  and  the  lust  of  the  eyes,  and  the  pride 
of  life,"  had  darkened  their  understanding.  The  path  to  the 
"goodly  land"  was  lost— filled  with  sand  by  the  crossing  and  re- 
crossing  of  gay  young  crowds  "who  sat  down  to  eat  and  drink  and 
rose  up  to  play*  and  by  the  elders  who  "turned  aside  quickly  out 
of  the  way"  to  worship  other  gods*.  The  guide  posts  erected  by 
early  leaders  were  cut  down.  Blind  guides  were  abundant  and 
badly  muddled  as  the  rest.  The  Guide  book  was  being  highly  crit- 
icised and  the  miraculous  and  supernatural  eliminated ;  "the  land 
of  _milk  and  hupney"  was  considered  doubtful*  and  the  leaks  and 
onions  bf  the  kingdom  of  darkness  more  to  be  desired. 
I  saw  the  wrath  of  God  descend  upon  them.  Fire  destroyed 
themt.  And  "the  Lord  made  a  new  thing;  the  earth  opened  her 
mouth  and  swallowed*  "  up  the  gainsayerst,  that  were  famous  in 
the  congregation,  men  of  renownS;"  and  of  the  others,  the  wilder- 
ness was  full  of  their  carcasses**. 


*Ex.  32:6-8.  tHeb.  3:18.  JNum.  10:2.  «  Num.  16:30.  fJud.  11. 
SNum.  16:2.  **Num.  14:29. 


PUBLISHED  BY  THE  PENTECOSTAL  UNION, 
DENVEE,    COLOEADO. 


Copyright,  1902,  by  Mrs.  M.  A,  White. 


TO  HIM  WHOM  I  LOVE, 

WHO    HATH    ENRICHED   ME   WITH 

A  GREAT  POSSESSION, 

AND  IN   THE   MIDST  THEREOF   HATH    BECOME 

THE  FAIREST  OF  TEN  THOUSAND 

TO  MY  SOUL, 
TO    WHOM    I    HAVE    DEDICATED    ALL    THINGS, 

TO  HIS  CAUSE 
I  Dedicate  this  Book. 

To  the  few  that  are  finding  the  narrow  way  and 
walking  therein,  may  it  be  a  benediction. 

To  the  unsanctified,  may  it  create  a  fear  lest  a  prom- 
ise being  left  them,  they  fail  in  unbelief. 

To  the  unsaved,  may  it  be  a  voice  crying,  Repent, 
Prepare  to  meet  thy  God  for  He  cometh  to  judge 
the  quick  and  the  dead. 


TO  THE  HOLINESS  PEOPLE  AND  THEIR 
FRIENDS  IN  ALL  LANDS. 


I  am  happy  to  introduce  Mrs.  Mollie  Alma 
White,  the  gifted  authoress  of  this  book,  having  en- 
joyed a  happy  acquaintance  with  her  and  all  the 
Bridwell  family  from  her  childhood;  in  the  provi- 
dence of  God  witnessing  her  glorious  conversion,  as 
well  as  that  of  her  brothers  and  sisters,  during  my 
pastorate  at  Vanceburg,  Kentucky,  in  1878-9.  At 
that  early  date,  as  I  felt  fully  assured,  she  received 
her  call  to  preach  the  everlasting  Gospel,  through 
native  timidity,  however,  postponing  her  response  to 
the  heavenly  vision  till  the  Lord  gloriously  sanctified 
her  eight  years  ago,  which  marks  the  epoch  of  her 
embarkation  on  the  good  old  Gospel  ship  by  the  side 
of  her  noble  husband,  now  widely  known  in  the  holi- 
ness movement,  Rev.  Kent  White.  Durir?g~tKese 
eighTyears  ^ne  has  traveled  extensively  in  this  great 
northwest,  giving  the  Gospel  trumpet  no  uncertain 
sound. 

This  is  no  ordinary  book,  made  up  of  creedistic 
and  dogmatic  platitudes,  like  thousands  which  are 
not  worth  reading,  but  it  is  well  filled  up  with 
heavenly  dynamite  and  Holy  Ghost  fire,  destined  to 
burn  and  blow  up  the  readersTeveT  and  anon  impart- 
ing those  galvanic  shocks  calculated  to  keep  the 
reader  spellbound  with  interest,  edification,  inspira- 
tion, and  putting  him  on  the  heavenly  boom  at  race 


horse  speed.  Sister  White  belongs  to  a  preaching 
family,  parents,  brothers  and  sisters,  in  the  sanctify- 
ing power  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  keeping  their  lights 
burning  and  the  trumpet  sounding  in  their  respective 
fields  of  labor,  dispersed  over  the  continent  from 
their  "Old  Kentucky  Home"  to  the  Pacific  ocean, 
among  whom  her  brother  Charles*  whose  conversion 
I  witnessed  when  a  little  boy  in  the  great  revival 
above  mentioned,  is  now  standing  at  the  front  of 
the  Colorado  conference,  M.  E.  Church. 

This  book  should  be  in  every  home  where  God 
is  feared  and  Jesus  loved.  Saints  will  receive  light, 
help  and  heavenly  impetus  while  they  read  it ;  luSrUi- 
while  sinners  will  be  stricken  with  Sinaic  thunder- 
bolts and  brought  down  to  the  feet  of  Jesus.  It 
really  needs  no  commendation  from  me  or  any  one 
else.  It  \vill  paddle  its  own  canoe  and  stand  upon  its 
own  merits.  Now  to  the  Father,  Son  and  Holy 
Ghost  we  devoutly  commend  Brother  and  Sister 
White,  with  all  the  Pentecostal  Missions,  of  which 
they  have  many  in  different  states,  and  all  readers  of 
this  book  resting  in  the  delectable  hope  of  meeting 
them  in  the  bright  upper  world. 

W.   B.   GOODBEY. 

June,  1901. 


*Rev.  Charles  W.  Bridwell  withdrew  from  the  Confer- 
ence in  1902  and  united  with  a  holiness  church  in  Denver. 


CONTENTS. 

Page. 

Introduction    3 

CHAPTER  I. 

Childhood — Conviction  and  Conversion   9 

CHAPTER  II. 

The  Inward  Conflict — Trials  in  School 21 

CHAPTER  III. 

Leaving  Home — God's  Presence  and  Blessing 32 

CHAPTER   IV. 
School    Teaching    in     Montana — Masonic     Ball — Card 

Playing — A  Noted  Gambler's  Experience 41 

CHAPTER  V. 
Return   Home — In   College — Overwork — Missionary    in 

Utah — Testings    54 

CHAPTER  VI. 
In  Montana — Last  Year  as  a  Teacher — School  Election 

— Trials  and  Triumphs    67 

CHAPTER  VII. 
In  Denver — Marriage — Struggle  Against  Wordliness. . .     77 

CHAPTER  VIII. 
Lamar  Charge — A  Pastor's   Wife — Church   Festivals — 

Christmas  Tree — Furnace  of  Affliction 84 

CHAPTER  IX. 
A   Mountain    Charge — Heart   Cry   for   Purity — Ladies' 

Aid  Society   99 

CHAPTER  X. 

Consecration  and   Sancuiication — Soul   Triumph Ill 

CHAPTER  XI. 

The  Bible  a  New  Book — Importance  of  Infinite  Testi 
mony — Telling  It  to  King's  Household — Ministers 
Shutting  Up  the  Kingdom  of  Heaven  Against  Men 
— Revelations  of  the  Holy  Spirit — "Out  and  Into" 
— Beulah — Satisfied  With  Jesus  (Song) — The  Sab- 
bath a  Type  of  This  Rest— Additional  Light- 
Shorn  Samsons  121 

CHAPTER  XII. 

Experiences  of  Bodily  Healing — Revival  Fires  at  Erie 
and  Pleasant  View— R.  A.  Calkin's  Testimony — 
View  of  Hell — Achan  in  the  Camp — Secret  Socie- 
ties the  Great  Diana 138 


CHAPTER  XIII. 

The  Boulder  Conference — The  Results  of  Preaching 
Holiness — Camp  Meeting — False  Prophets — Meet- 
ings in  Montana  and  Idaho — Blind  Watchmen 158 

CHAPTER  XIV. 

Remarkable  Experiences — Revival   Meetings  at  L — 
and  Bald   Mountain — Conflict  with   Satan  Over  a 
Sick  Bed  for  a  Soul— Still  Fighting  Holiness — Tab- 
ernacle Meeting  at  Longmont — "Aunt  Rebecca" — 

Second  Camp  Meeting  17S 

CHAPTER  XV. 

Box  Elder  Revival — Young  Man's  Death  Bed  Conver- 
sion— A  Mother's  Letter — Black  Hollow  Revival — 

Scene  at  a  Family  Altar — Holyoke  Meeting 193 

CHAPTER  XVI. 

Compromising  in.  Denver — Banner  of  Holiness  Low- 
ered— Removal  to  the  City — Opening  of  the  Pente- 
costal Mission  Work — Street  Meetings 205 

CHAPTER  XVII. 

Leadville  Conference — Conference  Babies  and  Bottles 
— Carnival  Experience — Leadville  and  Cheyenne 
Missions — Opening  of  the  Missionary  Home  and 
Bible  Training  School — Starting  the  Work  in  Butte 

City,  Montana   217 

CHAPTER  XVIII. 

The  Priest  and  Levite — :The  Mission,  the  Good  Samar- 
itan— The  Widow  of  Zarephath — Baal  Worship — 

Troublers  of  Israel — Hireling  Evangelists 236 

CHAPTER  XIX. 

Chicago  National  Holiness  Assembly — Metropolitan 
Holiness  Convention — Revival  Meeting  at  Paris, 

Kentucky    252 

CHAPTER  XX. 

Shut  Out  of  Pleasant  View — Praise — Christ  the  Re- 
deemer, Heavenly  Bridgegroom  and  Coming  King 
— The  Tribulations — Carnality  and  Its  Damnation.  261 

CHAPTER  XXI. 

Trip  to  Cheyenne,  Butte  City  and  the  Pacific  Coast — 
Tokens  of  God's  Favor — Revival  at  San  Jose— Or- 
ganization of  the  Pentecostal  Union — Holiness 
Conventions — Meeting  at  Sioux  City — Buffalo 

Rock  Camp  Meeting  277 

ADDENDA. 
Conventions  at  Rockford,  Kewanee  and  Danville,  111. . .   290 

APPENDIX. 

The  Methodist  Church — A  Fallen  People — Church  Au- 
fborities — Prophecies,  Warnings  and  Present 
Sta^  : . . .  .299 


o 

te 


BACK  FW  BEUltAH. 


CHAPTER  I. 

CONVICTION   AND   CONVERSION. 

When  nine  years  of  age  I  was  deeply  convicted 
of  sin  one  evening  while  listening  to  a  conversation 
in  our  home.  My  father  and  mother,  with  some 
relatives,  were  talking  of  the  eternal  torments  of 
the  wicked.  One  dark  picture  after  another  was 
drawn,  and  while  standing  some  distance  from  them, 
apparently  unnoticed,  I  was  so  overcome  with  the 
fear  of  hell  that  I  could  hardly  move.  I  soon  caught 
my  father's  eye,  when  he  reminded  me  that  it  was 
bedtime.  I  left  the  room  with  a  longing  to  unburden 
my  heart  to  some  one,  for  a  consciousness  of  sin  had 
settled  upon  me,  and  the  need  of  a  Savior  was  thus 
early  felt  in  my  life.  Daylight  was  anxiously  looked 
for,  in  hopes  that  it  would  bring  relief,  but  this  did 
not  raise  the  darkness  from  my  soul. 

We  lived  in  Lewis  County,  Kentucky,  nine 
miles  from  Vanceburg  on  the  Kinnikinic,  and  were 
without  an  easily  accessible  Sunday  school  or  church. 
Two  years  passed  without  an  opportunity  of  attend- 
ing a  meeting,  yet  there  was  such  concern  at  times 

9 


IO        LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

about  my  salvation  that-  I  was  unfit  for  work  or 
play. 

My  mother  was  familiar  with  many  of  the  old 
Methodist  hymns  and  often  sang  them  about  her 
work  and  before  retiring  at  night.  Wesley's  hymn 
on  the  final  account  greatly  impressed  me. 

"And  must  I  be  to  judgment  brought, 

And  answer  in  that  day 
For   every   vain   and   idle   thought, 
And  every  word  I  say? 

"Yes,  every  secret  of  my  heart 

Shall  shortly  be  made  known, 
And  I  receive  my  just  desert 
For  all  that  I  have  done. 

"Thou  awful  Judge  of  quick  and  dead, 

The  watchful  power  bestow; 
So  shall  I  to  my  ways  take  heed, 
To  all  I  speak  or  do. 

"If  now  thou  standest  at  the  door, 

0  let  me  feel  Thee  near, 

And  make  my  peace  with  God  before 

1  at  Thy  bar  appear." 

The  songs  she  sung  were  the  only  sermons  I 
heard.  They  were  used  by  the  Spirit  to  deepen  my 
conviction.  Among  them  were:  "Come  Humble 
Sinner  in  Whose  Breast,"  "There  Is  a  Spot  to  Me 
More  Dear,"  and  "Show  Pity  Lord,  O  Lord  For- 
give." 

I  meditated  on  these  hymns  day  and  night,  and 
asked  her  to  buy  me  a  book  so  I  could  learn  them. 


CONVICTION  AND  CONVERSION.  II 

She  had  so  many  things  on  her  mind  that  my  earnest 
appeal  went  unheeded.  Having  no  other  resource,  I 
believed  that  God  would  answer  my  prayer,  and 
knelt  down  and  asked  Him  for  the  book.  Two 
weeks  later  I  went  to  visit  my  married  sister.  In 
the  evening,  when  my  brother-in-law  returned  from 
town,  he  threw  a  beautiful  gilt  bound  hymn  book 
in  my  lap  with  the  remark,  "I  thought  we  needed  a 
hymn  book  here."  Much  of  my  time  was  spent  at 
their  home  with  the  book  in  some  secluded  place, 
memorizing  hymns. 

Two  years  elapsed.  A  revival  meeting  was  in 
progress  five  miles  from  our  home.  My  father, 
oldest  brother  and  two  of  my  sisters,  were  converted 
in  this  meeting.  I  only  had  the  opportunity  of  going 
twice.  At  the  first  service  I  went  forward  to  the 
altar,  and  the  next  evening  joined  the  church  on 
probation,  but  no  real  change  of  heart  was  experi- 
enced and  my  soul  groped  on  in  darkness  more 
miserable  than  before.  Having  been  encouraged  by 
receiving  a  hymn  book  in  answer  to  prayer,  I 
prayed  for  a  Bible  also. 

I  had  been  attending  our  district  school  for 
some  months,  when  one  day  the  teacher  came  to  me 
and  said,  "Do  you  know  you  are  going  to  win  the 
prize  in  your  spelling  class?"  This  was  a  surprise 
to  me,  for  my  sister,  who  was  in  the  same  class,  was 
considered  a  much  better  speller  than  myself.  The 
prize  was  to  be  either  a  Bible  or  an  album,  and  when 
asked  which  I  preferred,  I  exclaimed  "THE 
BIBLE !"  On  the  last  day  of  the  term  she  placed 
in  my  hand  a  beautiful  gilt  edged  Bible  with  a  clasp. 


12  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

It  was  valued  above  anything  that  I  had  ever  owned. 
All  my  spare  moments  were  devoted  to  the  New 
Testament.  The  first  four  books  were  read  and  re- 
read. 

The  time  was  drawing  near  for  me  to  be  bap- 
tized, and  taken  into  the  church.  I  was  living  in 
hopes  that  peace  would  come  to  my  soul  then,  but  in 
this  I  was  mistaken.  The  membership  vows  and 
water  baptism  brought  no  change.  Now  that  I  was 
a  church  member,  I  supposed  that  every  one  thought 
that  I  was  a  Christian,  but  too  \vell  I  knew  better. 
Jesus  called  the  Scribes  and  Pharisees,  "hypocrites" 
and  a  "generation  of  vipers."  My  accusing  con- 
science said,  "Hypocrite,  hypocrite."  There  were 
rattlesnakes  and  vipers  in  that  part  of  Kentucky 
which  were  a  constant  dread,  and  the  thought  of  be- 
ing compared  to  them  horrified  me. 

The  pastor,  S.  Pollard,  visited  our  home  oc- 
casionally, but  never  spoke  to  me  about  my  soul. 
My  oldest  brother  was  taken  down  with  typhoid 
fever  and  for  weeks  his  life  hung  in  the  balances. 
He  was  not  saved,  and  the  thought  of  his  going  into 
the  hell  that  was  pictured  in  the  Bible,  nearly  dis- 
tracted me.  There  were  days  that  I  had  scarcely 
any  appetite  for  food.  He,  like  myself,  was  a  mem- 
ber of  the  church,  but  if  he  had  been  converted  I  was 
satisfied  that  now  he  was  a  backslider.  I  watched 
him  very  closely  and  wondered  why  the  other  mem- 
bers of  the  family  were  not  more  concerned  about 
his  soul.  One  Sunday  morning  I  ran  all  the  way  to 
the  home  of  my  oldest  sister,  without  being  sent,  to 
tell  her  that  he  was  worse.  She  did  not  manifest  the 


CONVICTION  AND  CONVERSION.  13 

sorrow  that  I  expected  she  would,  and  I  burst  into 
tears  and  went  back  crying. 

Arriving  at  his  bedside  again,  I  found  an  old 
German  neighbor  standing  by  him.  As  he  turned 
away  he  shook  his  head  and  groaned.  I  understood 
what  it  meant.  Our  pastor  had  not  yet  called,  and  I 
wondered  why  mother  did  not  send  for  him. 

There  was  a  change  for  the  better  the  next 
morning,  but  somehow  I  felt  that  something  was 
going  to  be  done  in  his  behalf.  Looking  down  the 
road  I  recognized  our  preacher  coming  on  horse- 
back. Soon  he  was  at  his  bedside  reading  and  pray- 
ing. As  he  read  the  third  verse  of  the  iO3d  Psalm, 
"Who  forgiveth  all  thine  iniquities ;  who  healeth  all 
thy  diseases,"  every  muscle  in  my  brother's  face 
quivered,  his  expression  changed  and  indellibly 
stamped  itself  upon  me.  I  believed  God  saved  him 
at  that  instant.  Mother  wept  and  the  preacher  said, 
"It  is  done."  I  could  not  restrain  my  emotion  and 
left  the  room  to  weep,  feeling  that  all  was  right  be- 
tween him  and  God.  But  how  about  my  own  poor 
soul  ?  was  the  question  that  hung  gloomily  upon  me. 
I  would  willingly  have  chosen  sickness,  if  that  would 
have  brought  about  the  desired  change,  as  it  had  in 
the  life  of  my  brother ;  yet  after  recovering  he  was 
not  always  true  to  God. 

Two  more  years  of  trial  and  suffering  passed 
by.  One  Sunday  afternoon,  with  my  brothers  and 
sisters  I  attendee!  quarterly  meeting  in  Northcott 
chapel,  seven  miles  away.  The  presiding  elder  for 
whom  the  chapel  was  named  preached  the  sermon. 
His  text  was,  "There  is  a  friend  that  sticketh  closer 


14  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

than  a  brother."  (Prov.  18:24.)  To  me,  it  was  a 
wonderful  sermon.  He  told  of  one  who  had 
neglected  his  soul's  salvation  and  died  without  hope. 
Kind  friends  had  administered  to  his  wants  and  done 
all  that  loving  hands  and  words  could  do  to  comfort 
him  in  his  dying  hour,  but  instead  of  angels  coming 
to  bear  him  away  on  their  snowy  pinions,  demons 
were  present  to  escort  him  to  the  black  walls  of  de- 
spair. As  he  described  the  horror  of  the  dying  man 
crying,  "Drive  them  back,"  an  unseen  power  took 
hold  of  me;  I  sat  motionless,  wishing  an  altar  call 
might  be  made,  and  that  some  friend  would  help  me 
forward,  but  to  my  disappointment  no  invitation 
was  given. 

After  returning  home  the  darkness  was  intense. 
I  sought  places  of  retirement  where  I  might  breathe 
out  my  soul  to  God.  Often  in  the  night  deliverance 
seemed  very  near  and  the  blessing  almost  in  sight, 
when  the  enemy  would  whisper,  "If  you  are  con- 
verted you  will  shout  and  awaken  everybody  in  the 
house."  Whether  or  not  I  would  have  shouted,  I 
do  not  know,  yet  through  fear  that  I  might,  I  was 
kept  from  the  coveted  treasure. 

My  father  invited  a  minister  of  the  M.  E. 
church  to  preach  in  our  school  house,  where  a  class 
was  formed  and  our  membership  placed.  He  was  a 
bright  young  college  graduate,  preached  good  ser- 
mons, but  was  lacking  in  power.  He  wore  a  gold 
ring  on  his  left  hand  which  he  flourished  gracefully. 
I  wondered  at  his  disregard  of  God's  word,  and  the 
Methodist  discipline,  which  forbade  the  wearing  of 
gold,  and  was  annoyed  with  such  thoughts  as  who 


CONVICTION  AND  CONVERSION.  15 

would  be  the -fortunate  young  lady  on  whose  finger 
the  ring  would  be  placed  sooner  or  later.  In  a  short 
time  a  girl  of  my  own  age  was  wearing  it,  who^  be- 
came his  wife  before  he  left  the  charge.  And  so  my 
thoughts  were  distracted  from  spiritual  things  by 
these  inconsistencies.  "The  little  foxes  spoil  the 
vines."  ^  Would  to  God  that  all  could  learn  this  les- 
son and  ministers  as  well  as  others  would  leave  off 
their  gold.  Mother  often  remained  at  home  and  re- 
lied on  me  to  rehearse  the  sermon  to  her,  which  I 
could  usually  do  minutely. 

The  young  preacher  promised  to  hold  a  pro- 
tracted meeting  for  us,  to  which  we  anxiously 
looked  forward.  At  last  the  services  were  begun, 
but  after  preaching  three  evenings,  he  closed,  claim- 
ing that  duty  called  him  elsewhere.  He  did  not 
remain  long  on  the  charge,  and  another  young 
preacher  was  sent,  who  proved  to  have  less  ability 
and  spirituality  than  his  predecessor.  Our  hopes  for 
a  revival  were  again  blasted. 

The  Lord  had  answered  my  prayer  for  a  hymn 
book  and  Bible,  converted  my  brother  and  raised 
him  from  a  bed  of  sickness,  and  now  I  believed  it 
was  time  to  pray  for  a  preacher  to  come  who  would 
hold  special  services  and  give  us  a  chance  to  publicly 
seek  the  Lord. 

There  were  no  regrets  when  our  pastor  left. 
Anxiously  I  waited  for  his  successor,  W.  B.  Godbey, 
who  was  sent  in  answer  to  prayer.  Since  then  he 
has  become  well  known  as  the  pioneer  of  the  holiness 
movement  in  the  south  and  as  an  author  of  holiness 
books  and  commentaries.  Of  late  years  he  has  un- 


1 6  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

folded  into  one  of  the  ripest  of  Bible  scholars  and 
teachers,  carrying  with  him,  as  an  inseparable  com- 
panion, his  old  Greek  Testament  from  which  he 
gives  his  Bible  expositions.  His  writings  are 
"weighty  and  powerful,  but  his  bodily  presence  is 
weak,"  yet  like  Paul  of  great  endurance  and  tireless 
energy  he  continues  to  labor  for  the  cause  he  loves 
even  unto  the  end.  Dead  to  the  world  he  lives  unto 
Christ.  The  influence  of  his  saintly  life,  together 
with  his  books  of  such  intellectual  and  spiritual  un- 
derstanding, will  engrave  his  name  high  among 
God's  imperishable  ones  of  earth.  He  came  to  us 
with  that  peculiar  appearance  that  has  ever  been 
characteristic  of  the  man,  without  worldly  aspira- 
tions or  conformity.  He  wore  a  sack  coat,  a  soft 
felt  hat,  a  white  handkerchief  around  his  neck  and 
rode  horseback  over  his  circuit.  His  eyes  were 
weak  and  he  usually  kept  them  closed  while  speak- 
ing, sometimes  removing  his  steel  rimmed  glasses 
to  brush  away  the  tears.  He  said  that  since  the  Lord 
had  sanctified  him  he  had  become  a  weeping  prophet. 
He  preached  five  and  six  times  on  the  Sabbath  and 
usually  every  night  in  the  week,  holding  revivals  in 
all  the  school  houses  within  the  bounds  of  his  circuit. 
He  began  special  services  in  our  neighborhood 
November  5,  1878.  I  was  away  from  home  and  did 
not  attend  the  first  service ;  the  second  evening  I 
went  forward  to  the  altar  with  others  on  the  first 
invitation.  Our  hired  man  knelt  near  me,  whom  I 
had  always  considered  very  wicked,  as  he  attended 
balls  and  places  of  amusement,  where  we  were  not 
allowed  to  go.  After  a  short  struggle  he  leaped  to 


CONVICTION  AND  CONVERSION.  \"J 

his  feet  shouting.  On  the  other  side  of  me  was  a 
worldly  neighbor  girl  who  loved  to  dance;  she  too 
began  praising  God  for  deliverance.  These  conver- 
sions were  a  great  surprise  to  me.  I  naturally  sup- 
posed that  they  being  more  worldly  than  myself, 
would  be  longer  in  finding  Christ.  In  this  my  self- 
righteousness  was  manifest,  which  was  as  filthy  rags 
in  God's  sight.  I  had  to  learn  that  salvation  is  a 
free  gift,  and  not  merited  by  any  one;  also  that 
grace  would  reach  as  far  as  sin  had  gone,  when  con- 
ditions are  met  with  simple  faith  in  the  atoning 
blood.  In  great  distress  I  left  the  house  unsaved.  I 
could  almost  hear  the  wails  of  the  lost,  with  the 
feeling  that  one  more  step  would  take  me  over  the 
hrink  into  the  awful  abyss.  Everything  hitherto 
tried  had  failed  to  bring  relief.  I  now  felt  I  was  be- 
yond the  power  of  the  preacher  or  any  one  else  to 
help  me,  and  I  had  no  desire  to  sleep  or  eat. 

The  next  day,  as  far  as  possible,  I  remained  out 
of  sight.  My  heart's  cry  was,  "I  must  be  saved  to- 
night or  perish  forever."  On  entering  the  meeting 
house  that  evening  I  found  the  seats  all  taken  except 
two  benches  near  the  speaker,  that  were  used  for 
mourners.  I  sat  down  on  one  cf  these  near  the  end, 
.and  held  tightly  to  keep  from  falling  to  the  floor,  for 
I  was  almost  prostrated  under  my  lead.  The  text 
was  Romans  6:23,  "The  wages  of  sin  is  death;  but 
the  gift  of  God  is  eternal  life  through  Jesus  Christ 
our  Lord."  Breathing  became  difficult  as  the 
preacher  thundered  the  terrors  of  the  law.  The  old 
serpent  seemed  to  be  tightening  his  coils  about  me. 
Conviction  was  settling  down  with  such  power  on 


l8  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUI<AH. 

the  congregation  that  some  turned  sick  and  sought 
to  escape  from  the  house.  One  of  my  uncles,  who 
had  been  trying  to  be  a  Universalist,  went  out  and 
threw  up  his  supper  and  returned.  Hell  was  un- 
capped; men  looked  into  it  and  became  desperately 
sick  of  their  wages.  The  call  for  seekers  brought 
many  to  the  altar.  Demons  seemed  to  be  clutching 
at  my  heart  strings  as  I  sank  to  the  floor  at  the  end 
of  the  seat.  A  sister  came  to  talk  to  me,  but  I  was 
sorry  she  did,  as  I  wished  to  be  alone.  When  she 
left  the  preacher  came  and  knelt  at  my  side  and 
asked  me  to  repeat  the  familiar  lines : 

"But  drops  of  grief  can  ne'er  repay 

The  debt  of  love  I  owe; 
Here,   Lord,  I  give  myself  away, 
Tis  all  that  I  can  do." 

My  reply  was  that  I  had  said  that  again  and 
again.  While  he  was  talking  I  felt  that  Jesus  was 
far  away  and  could  not  hear  me ;  I  was  so  inwardly 
absorbed  and  crushed  that  I  could  scarcely  hear  the 
voice  of  the  preacher  who  undoubtedly  was  speaking 
in  his  usual  tone.  He  said,  trying  to  arouse  me  from 
this  death-like  stupor,  "Daughter,  will  you  take 
Jesus  for  your  prophet,  priest  and  king — your  pro- 
phet to  teach  you,  your  priest  to  forgive  you  and 
your  king  to  rule  you?"  I  told  him  that  I  would 
gladly  do  so.  He  asked  me  then  to  rise  to  my  feet. 
My  reply  was,  "No,  I  must  be  saved  to-night  and  I 
can't  leave  until  the  work  is  done,  if  I  have  to  stay 
here  until  morning."  "But  you  have  taken  Jesus, 
have  you  not  ?"  I  answered  "Yes."  He  took  me  by 


CONVICTION  AND  CONVERSION.  19 

the  arm  and  assisted  me  in  rising.  Before  I  had 
fairly  stood,  my  heart  opened,  and  heaven  came 
down  and  filled  and  thrilled  me  until  my  whole  being 
was  tremulous  with  new  life.  The  power  of  the 
Spirit  was  so  great  upon  me  that  I  was  unable  to 
stand  without  support.  Everybody  around  me  was 
changed,  the  faces  of  some  were  radiant  with  light, 
while  others  were  equally  dark.  All  eyes  apparently 
were  upon  me.  Some  said  shout,  others  said  sing, 
but  I  could  do  nothing  but  laugh,  wondering  what 
heaven  would  be  if  it  were  any  better.  A  young 
man,  who  claimed  to  be  an  unbeliever  and  who  ap- 
parently had  been  unmoved  until  this  time,  observ- 
ing the  change  that  had  come  over  me,  turned  to  my 
mother  and  said:  "I  can  never  doubt  again  after 
seeing  this."  Three  days  later  he  was  gloriously 
converted. 

On  the  way  home  that  night  my  heart  was 
singing 

"Safe  in  the  arms  of  Jesus, 

Safe  on  His  gentle  breast, 
There  by  His  love  o'ershadowed 
Sweetly  my  soul  shall  rest. 

"Jesus  my  heart's  dear  refuge, 

Jesus  who  died  for  me, 
Firm  on  the  rock  of  ages 
Ever  my  trust  shall  be." 

I  understood  for  the  first  time  the  song  that 
the  heavenly  host  sang  over  the  babe  of  Bethlehem, 
and  felt  that  I  could  vie  with  them  in  singing, 
"Glory  to  God  in  the  highest."  The  night  was  full 


2O  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAK. 

of  melody — all  things  seemed  to  be  praising  God. 
Even  the  whip-poor-will  with  it's  doleful  notes,  that 
had  formerly  brought  such  gloomy  forebodings, 
now  united  with  me  in  praises  to  my  King. 


CHAPTER  II. 

THE)  INWARD  CONFLICT — TRIALS  IN  SCHOOL. 

It  was  Sunday  afternoon  following  my  conver- 
sion. I  was  alone  in  the  house  sitting  by  the  fire 
reading  the  Bible,  when  some  wicked  thoughts  came 
into  my  mind.  Frightened  by  them,  I  arose,  has- 
tened to  a  back  room  and  dropped  upon  my  knees 
in  prayer.  The  adversary  said,  "You  have  sinned; 
and  you  were  seven  years  seeking  Christ  and  it  will 
be  seven  more  before  you  are  restored."  Bewildered 
by  the  sudden  onset,  and  stung  by  the  upbraiding 
word  of  Satan,  with  a  humiliating  sense  of  the  long 
struggle  and  the  thought  of  having  to  repeat  it,  filled 
my  soul,  for  a  moment,  with  inexpressable  agony. 
In  this,  my  first  battle  as  a  young  Christian  soldier, 
I  found  the  eye  of  the  Savior  upon  me.  Seeing  my 
confusion  he  quickly  dispatched  help  and  light.  In 
the  realm  of  my  soul  the  Spirit  of  God  struck  the 
key  notes  of  my  first  battle  hymn : 

"Are  there  no  foes  for  me  to  face? 

Must  I  not  stem  the  flood? 
Is  this  vile  world  a  friend  to  grace 
To  help  me  on  to  God? 

"Since  I  must  fight  if  I  would  reign, 
Increase  my  courage,  Lord; 
I'll  bear  the  toil,  endure  the  pain, 

Supported  by  Thy  word."  21 


22  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

Remembering  that  the  Word  said  "resist  the 
devil  and  he  will  flee  from  you,"  I  said,  "get  thee 
behind  me,  Satan ;  I  have  not  sinned,  and  if  it  were 
so,  then  Jesus  pardons."  Again,  the  dove  of  peace 
rested  upon  me,  and  I  wept  for  joy,  after  gaining  the 
victory  in  the  first  real  conflict  of  my  Christian  ex- 
perience. From  this  hour  the  warfare  began  and 
trials  and  besetments  awaited  me  on  every  hand. 

My  oldest  sister  at  home  was  very  nervous  and 
often  my  presence  annoyed  her.  I  sought  to  please 
her  in  different  ways,  but  did  not  succeed.  When  I 
found  a  little  time  to  myself  the  hymn  book  and 
Bible  were  my  constant  companions.  She  com- 
plained of  my  singing,  and  wanted  some  work  done 
whenever  she  found  me  with  the  Bible.  She  did  not 
realize  how  the  enemy  was  using  her,  and  the  in- 
justice of  her  complaints,  while  evident  to  all,  awak- 
ened no  sympathy  for  me,  in  these  times  when  I  suf- 
fered greatly.  My  father  and  mother  were  in  the 
habit  of  giving  away  to  her  in  everything,  which 
made  it  harder  still.  Mother  had  done  it  more  to 
avoid  trouble,  knowing  that  father  would  always 
take  her  part,  whether  she  was  right  or  wrong.  A 
gulf  widened  between  us  and  it  was  a  great  relief  to 
have  her  go  away  from  home.  The  partiality  shown 
her  aroused  resentment  in  my  heart  that  required 
a  continual  effort  to  overcome. 

We  lived  on  a  small  farm,  which  my  father 
owned,  and  on  which  place  he  operated  a  tannery. 
Much  of  my  time  was  spent  in  outdoor  work.  There 
were  seven  sisters  and  three  brothers  and  only  one  of 
the  latter  old  enough  to  be  of  much  help.  Having  a 


INWARD    CONFLICT.  23 

strong  constitution  in  my  early  life  the  heavy  bur- 
dens naturally  fell  upon  me,  which  slowly  under- 
mined my  health  and  laid  the  foundation  for  years 
of  suffering.  My  strength  was  taxed  oft-times  to 
its  utmost  capacity  in  lifting  loads,  frequently  sacks 
of  grain,  that  injured  my  blood  vessels. 

My  sister  Lida,  who  was  three  years  and  a  half 
my  senior,  was  proud  and  ambitious.  We  were  not 
at  all  congenial,  her  aspirations  being  entirely  differ- 
ent from  mine.  Nora,  who  was  the  nearest  of  my 
own  age,  stayed  with  my  married  sister  most  of  the 
time. 

Things  did  not  always  run  smoothly  among  us, 
and  there  were  often  divisions  and  contentions 
which  afforded  ample  opportunity  to  develop  thj 
Christian  graces.  Rather  than  strive,  I  learned  to 
suffer,  knowing  that  the  Bible  said,  "Resist  not  evil 
but  overcome  evil  with  good."  Mother  often  said 
that  I  would  not  take  my  own  part.  There  were 
frightful  uprisings  in  my  heart  which  required  a 
constant  effort  to  keep  down,  but  through  much 
prayer  I  found  the  grace  of  God  sufficient. 

Much  was  being  said  about  our  education,  but 
my  father  often  remarked  that  it  was  useless  to 
spend  money  on  me,  as  he  thought  I  was  too  dull  and 
stupid  to  learn.  I  had  only  been  to  school  a  few 
months  in  my  whole  life,  while  my  sisters  and  oldest 
brother  had  not  only  attended  the  public  school  regu- 
larly, but  had  been  at  different  times  to  the  seminary 
at  Vanceburg.  The  work  at  home  was  hardest  dur- 
ing the  spring  months  and  nearly  always  some  of 
them  were  away  to  school. 


24  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAIi. 

One  day  mother  said  the  way  was  open  for 
Nora  and  myself  to  go  to  the  seminary.  This  time 
my  father  made  no  objections  arid  in  less  than  a  fort- 
night we  were  in  the  school.  Having  looked  for- 
ward to  this  time  I  had  studied  hard  to  prepare  for 
it,  often  burning  the  midnight  oil  over  my  books. 
My  ambition  was  to  become  a  school  teacher  that  I 
might  earn  some  money  for  myself. 

Changed  environments,  and  close  application  to 
study,  caused  me  to  somewhat  neglect  secret  prayer, 
and  the  reading  of  God's  word,  which  soon  led  to  the 
discovery  that  some  of  the  joy  had  gone  from  my 
heart.  The  first  attempt  of  the  enemy  was  to  throw 
me  suddenly  from  the  track.  In  this  he  had  failed. 
Now  he  was  trying  the  gradual  process,  and  had 
well  nigh  succeeded  before  I  awakened  to  the  fact. 
The  principal  noticed  my  depression  of  spirits  and 
tried  in  every  way  to  cheer  me  up,  yet  he  was  ignor- 
ant of  the  real  cause.  He  asked  some  of  the  students 
to  take  me  out  to  gather  wild  flowers  and  make  me 
laugh  if  possible.  To  one  whose  soul  was  famishing 
this,  otherwise  pleasant  pastime,  was  a  hopeless 
remedy. 

"Sweet  prospects,  sweet  birds  and  sweet  flowers, 
Had  all  lost  their  sweetness  to  me." 

My  timidity  caused  me  great  suffering  in 
school,  and  the  principal  told  my  father  that  I  must 
overcome  it,  otherwise  it  was  useless  for  me  to  try 
to  recite;  but  in  spite  of  all  efforts,  for  the  time  at 
least,  I  failed. 

The  term  closed  and  we  returned  home  for  the 


INWARD    CONFLICT.  25 

summer.  I  planned  to  take  the  teachers'  examina- 
tion in  July  and  felt  I  must  put  in  all  the  time  possi- 
ble in  preparation.  Two  weeks  before  the  examina- 
tion, Dr.  Godbey  announced  special  services  to  be 
held  in  the  neighboring  school  house.  I  greatly 
needed  the  help  of  these  meetings,  but  to  take  the 
time  for  them  from  my  studies  I  feared  might  be  at 
the  cost  of  a  certificate.  I  took  it  to  the  Lord  in 
prayer  and  got  from  His  word,  "Seek  ye  first  the 
kingdom  of  God  and  His  righteousness  and  all 
these  things  shall  be  added  unto  you.  Be  not  there- 
fore anxious  for  the  morrow,  for  the  morrow  will  be 
anxious  for  itself.  Sufficient  unto  the  day  is  the 
evil  thereof."  (Mat.  6:33-34  R.  V.)  Great  peace 
came  with  the  decision  to  first  look  after  the  welfare 
of  my  soul  by  attending  the  services.  In  doing  this  I 
was  wonderfully  uplifted  and  blest,  and  later  had 
the  help  and  favor  of  God  in  getting  a  number  two 
certificate.  An  older  sister,  with  a  better  education 
than  myself,  with  like  spiritual  poverty,  sacrificed 
the  meetings  in  the  interest  of  a  certificate  and  failed 
in  the  examination. 

In  the  revival  meetings  I  won  some  important 
victories.  An  old  man,  "Uncle  Gus  Frizell,"  as  he 
was  called,  with  snow-white  hair  and  beard,  came  a 
long  way  to  attend  the  services.  He  often  led  the 
prayer  meeting,  preceding  the  sermon.  He  asked  me 
one  day  if  I  would  pray  that  evening  if  he  were  to 
call  on  me.  This  question  was  very  unexpected,  and 
before  I  had  time  to  collect  my  thoughts  I  told  him 
that  I  had  said  that  I  would  never  refuse.  He  was 
delighted.  Stammering  and  frightened,  I  tried  to 


26  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

tell  him  that  I  did  not  intend  to  give  him  a  decided 
answer,  but  he  would  not  await  a  further  explana- 
tion. To  refuse  now  would  be  to  lay  down  the  cross 
which  I  could  not  think  of  doing,  for  I  knew  it 
would  be  perilous,  therefore  proceeded  to  put  a  few 
sentences  together,  to  memorize,  for  the  occasion. 
That  night,  when  called  upon  to  pray,  my  mind  be- 
came a  blank,  and  for  a  moment  I  was  speechless; 
when  opening  my  mouth  in  the  effort  the  Holy 
Spirit  came  to  my  help  and  began  to  pray  through 
me,  astonishing  me  more  perhaps  than  any  one  else. 
In  it  a  picture  came  before  me  of  human  beings 
sporting  on  the  edge  of  an  awful  precipice  ready  to 
be  dashed  to  the  abyss  below.  Forgetting  myself  I 
cried  to  God  in  their  behalf.  Fear  and  timidity  were 
swept  away  and  my  soul,  in  the  liberty  of  the  Spirit, 
mounted  heavenward.  Hallelujah!  I  learned  the 
secret  of  openly  addressing  God  and  never  com- 
mitted another  prayer.  The  sermon  preceding  it 
was  a  heart-searching  one  and  soon  there  were  sobs 
and  groans  from  the  penitents  kneeling  at  the  altar. 

The  preacher  said  next  day,  "Daughter,  you 
made  a  wonderful  prayer  last  night."  I  told  him  I 
did  not  know  much  about  how  I  had  prayed.  He 
smiled,  with  a  "God  bless  you,"  and  went  on.  My 
cup  was  running  over  with  joy  all  day,  for  another 
battle  had  been  fought  and  the  victory  won,  yet  no 
one  but  Jesus  knew  how  great  was  the  conflict. 

The  school  directors  were  engaging  teachers 
for  the  fall  and  winter  terms.  The  supply  was 
greater  than  the  demand,  hence  it  was  hard  to  se- 
cure a  situation.  There  was  an  out  of  the  way  dis- 


INWARD    CONFLICT.  2/ 

trict  among  the  hills,  where  some  teachers  had  com- 
menced to  teach  and  failed  to  finish  the  term.  I  had 
heard  of  this  place  and  knew  well  that  the  school 
was  by  no  means  a  desirable  one,  but  told  the  Lord 
if  it  were  His  will  I  would  take  it.  I  applied  and 
got  the  school.  No  boarding  place  could  be  found 
nearer  than  three  and  a  half  miles  from  the  school 
house,  and  the  road  was  rough  and  hilly.  Becom- 
ing weary  on  these  long  walks  I  would  sit  down  to 
rest,  while  two  little  girls,  who  accompanied  me, 
often  ran  ahead  and  gathered  wild  flowers,  making 
them  into  bouquets.  These  little  bright-eyed  child- 
ren, innocent  and  playful  as  squirrels,  I  would  find 
awaiting  me  on  a  hill  or  in  a  ravine  cozily  seated  in 
some  nook  of  the  road.  When  I  came  up  they  would 
show  their  sympathy  and  love  by  giving  me  their 
prettiest  flowers.  There  were  many  poisonous  ser- 
pents in  that  part  of  the  country  for  which  we  were 
on  the  constant  lookout.  A  peculiar  presentment 
came  to  me  that  my  Christian  life  would  be  much 
like  this  road — rough,  long,  hilly,  beset  with  poison- 
ous serpents  and  yet  occasionally  cheered  with  love's 
bright  faces  and  sweet  flowers. 

The  school  house  was  an  old  log  cabin  and  had 
part  of  a  puncheon  floor — the  rest  was  mother  earth. 
There  was  a  fire  place,  one  window  and  a  few  old 
benches  without  backs.  The  school  was  opened  each 
morning  with  prayer  and  the  reading  of  the  scrip- 
tures. The  first  day  there  were  twenty-two  pupils, 
two  young  men  among  them,  one  of  whom  brought 
a  message  from  his  father,  who  was  chairman  of  the 
school  board,  saying  that  he  wanted  his  children  to 


28  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


study  geography,  but  did  not  want  them  taught  that 
the  earth  was  round,  as  he  had  heard  enough  of  that 
nonsense.  The  young  man  said  he  thought  "pa  was 
a  little  off,"  and  proposed  to  learn  as  it  was  in  the 
book.  The  old  man's  confidence  was  soon  gained 
and  he  consented  to  my  teaching  the  "new  theory,'* 
as  he  called  it. 

In  this  school  many  valuable  lessons  were 
learned,  especially  that  of  endurance.  Sometimes 
when  my  strength  was  overtaxed  I  remembered  that 
the  scriptures  said,  "Thou  hast  been  faithful  over  a 
few  things,  I  will  make  thee  ruler  over  many  things.'* 
(Matthew  25-21). 

Soon  after  the  three  months'  term  closed  I  had 
fifty  dollars  coming  —  all  my  own  money.  Brother 
Godbey  advised  my  father  and  mother  to  move  to 
Millersburg,  where  we  could  have  the  advantage  of 
the  female  college.  Instead  of  spending  the  money, 
as  I  had  planned,  the  whole  amount  was  given  to 
mother  to  be  used  in  making  preparation  to  move. 
The  day  came  for  our  departure.  There  were  few 
regrets  on  my  part  in  taking  the  last  look  at  the  old 
home,  as  my  life  there  had  been  one  of  such  loneli- 
ness, hardship  and  toil. 

The  trip  of  seventy  miles  was  made  about 
March  10,  1880,  in  a  covered  wagon  through  the 
country,  our  goods  having  been  shipped  ahead. 
Brother  Godbey  had  arranged  places  among  the  peo- 
ple, along  the  way,  for  us  to  stop  over  nights. 

Arriving  at  Millersburg,  in  the  heart  of  the  blue 
grass  region,  we  were  invited  by  the  president  to 
spend  a  few  days  at  the  college,  which  was  located  in 


INWARD    CONFLICT.  29 

the  center  of  the  town.  Companies  of  young  ladies 
were  strolling  about  the  campus.  They  talked  much 
about  their  lessons  in  the  languages,  sciences,  litera- 
ture, art,  etc.  This  started  anew  my  thirst  for  know- 
ledge. How  it  all  thrilled  me!  And  the  hope  and 
joy  that  came  even  in  the  thought  of  the  possibility 
of  an  education!  The  Word  says  that,  "No  good 
thing  will  He  withhold  from  them  that  walk  up' 
rightly,"  and  I  believed  it. 

On  a  seven-acre  lot  a  short  distance  from  the 
town  Brother  Godbey  was  building  a  house  of  lum- 
ber shipped  from  some  mountain  land  my  father 
owrned.  Here  his  family  was  to  live  while  his  son 
attended  the  Kentucky  Weslyan  College,  also  located 
at  Millersburg.  The  young  man,  an  apt  linguist, 
was  preparing  himself  for  missionary  work  in 
China,  when  he  took  the  quick  consumption  and 
died.  A  remarkable  scene  took  place  at  his  bedside, 
which  my  mother  and  sister  Lida  witnessed.  The 
Spirit  came  upon  the  father  and  he,  victorious  over 
his  loss,  shouted  his  son  to  the  other  shore.  After 
his  death  the  family  moved  to  Carlyle,  Kentucky, 
and  Brother  Godbey  proposed  that  we  save  rent  by 
exchanging  our  old  home  place  for  this  property.  In 
doing  so,  a  great  barrier  to  our  continuing  in  school 
was  removed. 

We  had  asked  God  to  send  us  some  one  to  lead 
us  out  of  the  bondage  of  sin  and  He  sent  Brother 
Godbey.  Now,  through  his  counsel  and  help,  the 
way  was  being  opened  for  us  into  new  fields  of 
knowledge  and  usefulness.  He  was  the  Moses  of 
our  family.  God  laid  us  upon  his  heart  and  he  be- 


3O  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

came  inseparably  woven  into  the  warp  and  woof  of 
our  lives.  All  the  buds,  flowers  and  fruits  of  the 
Spirit  that  have  appeared  in  the  garden  of  our  souls, 
he  has  had  something  to  do  with.  For  his  life  we 
reverently  bow  before  God  in  thanksgiving. 

After  attending  the  college  about  ten  months  I 
had  to  stop  and  teach.  The  board  of  directors 
offered  me  the  school  in  the  district  in  which  we 
lived,  which  was  one  of  the  best  in  the  county,  and 
sought  after  by  leading  teachers.  It  was  somewhat 
of  a  surprise  to  me  when  I  obtained  a  first  grade  cer- 
tificate which  was  necessary  to  get  the  school. 

At  this  time  my  aunt,  who  lived  in  Montana, 
came  to  visit  us.  Two  of  my  older  sisters  had  al- 
ways been  favorites  of  hers.  A  few  days  after  her 
arrival  I  overheard  her  tell  mother  that  she  wanted 
to  take  one  of  them  back  with  her.  Mother  told  her 
that  neither  of  them  could  be  induced  to  go  so  far 
from  home,  and  added  that  Mollie  would  come  the 
nearest  going  of  any.  She  did  not  resitate  to  say 
that  she  would  prefer  one  of  the  others,  but  rather 
than  have  none  would  take  me. 

I  had  passed  through  one  of  the  greatest  trials 
of  my  life  that  day.  The  cord  that  had  so  tenderly 
bound  me  to  some  of  the  family  was  gradually  being- 
severed.  I  had  driven  with  mother  to  Carlyle,  a 
distance  of  six  miles,  and  silently  wept  all  the  way 
there  and  back.  For  three  years  God  had  permitted 
me  to  go  through  the  most  trying  ordeals,  preparing 
me  for  the  separation  that  was  to  come.  My  aunt 
returned  home  with  the  understanding  from  me  that 
I  was  soon  to  follow.  God's  will  was  made  plain 


INWARD    CONFLICT.  3! 

and  He  said  unto  me  as  He  did  to  Abraham,  "Get 
thee  out  of  thine  own  country  and  from  thy  father's 
house  into  a  land  which  I  will  show  thee." 

We  had  heard  many  stories  of  the  wild  western 
life,  and  when  my  aunt  told  of  the  hostilities  of  the 
Indians  my  mother  wondered  that  she  had  ever  seen 
her  sister's  face  again.  After  returning  to  Montana 
she  engaged  the  spring  term  of  school  at  Bannock 
for  me.  In  this  state  school  teachers  received  from 
sixty  to  one  hundred  dollars  per  month.  This  was 
a  great  inducement,  but  not  all;  the  greatest  desire 
of  my  heart  was  to  be  used  of  the  Lord  in  this  new 
country  as  a  missionary.  From  the  moment  of  my 
conversion  I  believed  that  my  life  would  be  spent 
some  way  in  the  Lord's  service,  and  supposed  that 
my  only  chance  would  be  to  go  to  some  home  or 
foreign  mission  field,  as  the  Methodist  church  had 
made  no  provision  for  women  to  preach.  That  this 
opening  was  of  God  I  could  not  doubt,  and  believed 
it  to  be  the  first  step  to  a  still  greater  work.  My 
plans  were  kept  for  a  time  from  my  father  and 
mother,  knowing  it  would  be  hard  for  them  to  let  me 
go.  At  last,  when  presented,  it  was  some  time  be- 
fore they  were  conviced  that  it  was  God's  will,  and 
made  no  further  objections. 


CHAPTER  III. 

LEAVING   HOME. 

On  the  2Oth  of  March,  1882,  my  ticket  was 
purchased  for  Dillon,  Montana,  at  a  cost  of  one  hun- 
dred and  six  dollars,  and  at  4  o'clock  in  the  after- 
noon I  started  alone  on  my  long-  journey.  As  the 
carriage  drove  away  I  looked  back  and  saw  mother 
standing  in  the  door  of  the  lattice  porch.  I  believed 
that  I  could  read  her  thoughts  as  she  prayed  for  God 
to  take  care  of  her  child  and  bring  her  safe  home 
again.  No  tie  was  ever  stronger  between  mother 
and  daughter  than  that  between  us.  I  had  promised 
her  not  to  get  married  until  she  saw  me  again  and 
that,  God  willing,  I  would  return  in  two  years.  An 
hour  later  my  train  reached  Cynthiana,  where  I  met 
my  father's  sister,  who,  with  a  distressed  look,  said : 
"Child,  I  would  rather  see  you  buried  than  taking 
this  trip,  for  then  I  would  know  where  your  corpse 
was.  You  know  nothing  of  the  sin  of  this  wicked 
world,  and  your  parents  have  shown  but  little  wis- 
dom in  letting  you  take  such  a  journey  alone." 

I  told  her  that  I  was  not  alone,  that  I  had  a 
companion  who  never  left  me.  She  was  not  a 
Christian  and  could  not  comprehend  this  statement. 

After  leaving  this  place  I  could  no  longer  re- 
strain my  tears,  and  for  the  next  few  minutes  my 
whole  life  in  a  panorama  passed  before  me.  In  it 

82 


LEAVING    HOME.  33 

all,  God  showed  me  how  His  providences  and 
mercies  had  overruled  and  worked  out  for  my  good 
in  the  hardships  and  struggles  that  were  past.  It 
was  a  wonderful  experience,  in  which  life  was  seen 
in  a  flash  of  time,  yet  so  distinct  and  perfect  was  each 
shifting  scene,  that  it  was  deeply  written  upon  my 
memory.  It  closed  with  my  mother's  pale  face, 
and  my  father's  troubled  look,  as  he  tremblingly 
bade  me  good  bye.  Then  too,  if  I  had  an  idol  it 
was  my  little  brother  Charles,  whom  Dr.  Godbey 
had  predicted  would  preach  the  gospel.  His  pitiful 
look,  as  I  drove  away,  haunted  me.  Soon  there 
would  be  thousands  of  miles  between  us.  All  this 
came  with  full  force  against  my  soul,  and  following 
in  its  wake  came  thoughts  of  the  future.  The  West 
would  be  new,  and  I  dreaded  new  scenes  and  places. 
Then  too,  such  dark  pictures  had  been  drawn  of  the 
rough  western  life — of  Indians,  Mormons,  pick- 
pockets and  fiends  with  traps  for  girls,  that  my 
heart  failed  me.  But  the  Comforter  was  near  and 
whispered,  "Let  not  your  heart  be  troubled,  neither 
let  it  be  afraid.  I  will  not  leave  you  comfortless ;  I 
will  come  unto  you.  Peace  I  give  unto  you,  my 
peace  I  leave  with  you ;  not  as  the  world  giveth,  give 
I  .unto  you."  I  had  committed  the  I4th  chapter  of 
St.  John  to  memory  some  years  before  in  which 
these  words  were  found,  and  often  had  been  com- 
forted by  them,  but  never  did  they  come  to  me  with 
such  meaning  as  now.  Not  to  be  troubled,  nor 
afraid,  not  left  comfortless,  will  give  not  as  the 
world  giveth,  etc.  Wonderful  words!  Earth  had 
never  heard  such  a  farewell  as  this  spoken  by  Jesus 


34  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEX'LAH. 

to  his  disciples.  Surely  these  are  the  sweetest  words 
ever  spoken  in  a  world  where  friends  must  part. 

Being  greatly  comforted  by  this  experience, 
I  went  on  to  face  the  realities  of  life  more  firmly 
planted  on  the  promises  of  God  than  ever  before. 

On  the  omnibus  at  Cincinnati,  just  as  Kentucky 
was  receding  from  view,  an  insolent  young  man 
crowded  me  in  the  seat,  for  which  there  was  no 
necessity,  as  there  was  plenty  of  room.  I  was  led 
to  rebuke  him  and  said,  "Sir,  is  there  not  room 
enough  for  you?  If  not,  we  will  see  that  the  driver 
makes  it  .for  you  on  the  outside."  He  sat  over.  I 
congratulated  myself  on  the  courage  exercised  in 
this  little  act  of  heroism. 

When  near  Indianapolis  we  encountered  a  fear- 
ful rainstorm,  which  delayed  the  train  for  twenty 
hours.  Our  coach  was  filled  with  passengers  and 
my  seat  had  to  be  shared  with  some  one  else. 

Reaching  St.  Louis  out  of  time  I  had  to  spend 
the  day  in  the  union  depot,  which  proved  to  be 
one  of  the  most  wearisome  of  my  life.  Great  crowds 
were  surging  to  and  fro,  and  if  I  left  my  seat  I 
was  not  likely  to  get  another  until  an  outgoing  train 
was  called.  I  had  not  slept  for  forty-eight  hours, 
and  went  to  the  ticket  window  to  secure  a  berth  on 
the  sleeper.  With  difficulty  I  passed  through  the 
immense  throng.  I  carried  two  pocket  books,  and 
in  making  change  left  the  one  that  contained  my 
railroad  ticket  and  the  most  of  my  money  in  the 
window,  which  I  did  not  discover  until  I  returned 
to  the  waiting  room.  Uttering  a  prayer  to  God  to 
save  me  from  the  disaster  of  losing  it,  I  rushed  back 


LEAVING    HOME.  35 

and  found  it  where  I  had  left  it.  A  hundred  hands 
could  have  picked  it  up  and  no  one  would  have  been 
the  wiser.  In  my  alarm,  cold  drops  of  perspiration 
stood  on  my  brow  and  my  heart  beat  as  though  it 
would  break  through  its  walls.  Nothing  less  than 
a  miracle  had  been  performed  in  my  behalf,  which 
greatly  increased  my  confidence  in  Him  who  had 
promised  never  to  leave  me  nor  forsake  me.  My 
train  was  at  last  called. 

The  next  morning  found  me  but  seventy  miles 
from  St.  Louis,  where  there  was  a  further  delay  of 
ten  hours,  while  at  Omaha  I  had  to  wait  over  night 
for  the  west-bound  train. 

On  reaching  the  desolate  wastes  of  Wyoming 
a  feeling  of  loneliness  and  fear  come  over  me.  On 
the  western  border  of  the  territory  a  number  of 
cowboys  boarded  the  train.  I  was  the  only  woman 
in  the  car  and  the  tears  flowed  in  spite  of  efforts 
to  restrain  them.  Having  upset  a  bottle  of  cam- 
phor in  my  lunch  basket  and  learning  that  meals  were 
a  dollar  each  at  the  rough  station  houses,  I  was  won- 
dering what  to  do,  when  a  fine  looking  old  gentle- 
man, who  had  taken  occasion  to  call  my  attention 
to  the  scenery  along  the  road,  asked  me  if  I  would 
accept  a  box  of  crackers  and  cheese.  It  was  excep- 
tionally nice,  and  he  not  knowing  my  need,  I  took 
it  with  thanks  as  coming  from  the  Lord. 

We  were  soon  to  reach  Ogden,  a  Mormon  City, 
where  I  had  been  told  that  the  men  would  stand  on 
the  platform  of  the  depot  and  watch  for  young  girls 
with  a  view  of  making  them  polygamous  wives.  I 
learned  afterwards  they  were  not  openly  as  bold 


36  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

as  this,  only  on  the  arrival  of  emigrant  bands  of 
Mormons,  when  they  took  wives  from  among  them. 
But  at  the  time,  the  thought  of  having  a  half  dozen 
marriage  proposals  at  the  depot  and  being  nearly 
carried  off  bodily  was  dreadful.  There  had  been 
so  many  delays  on  the  road  I  hoped  there  would 
be  none  here.  Before  reaching  the  city  a  young 
man  took  a  seat  near  me.  He  had  a  kind  face  and 
noticing  the  card  on  my  valise  he  showed  me  his 
ticket  to  the  same  destination.  The  fear  of  the  place 
partly  left  me  when  I  thought  that  he  might  kindly 
assist  me  in  changing  cars.  On  reaching  Ogden,  I 
was  courteously  guided  through  .a  motley  looking 
crowd  to  the  waiting  room,  where  I  learned  that  a 
washout  on  the  road  would  delay  me  twenty-four 
hours.  The  young  man  took  the  opportunity  to 
visit  Salt  Lake  City  and  was  soon  aboard  a  train  for 
that  place. 

Having  enquired  about  the  hotels,  I  secured  a 
room  in  one  that  was  well  recommended.  While 
walking  to  it  I  was  conscious  that  evil  eyes  were 
upon  me.  Upon  entering  the  room  and  turning  the 
key  a  sense  of  fear  and  uneasiness  came  over  me, 
but  lifting  my  heart  to  God  in  prayer  I  was  soon 
composed,  and  retired  for  the  night,  knowing  my 
security  was  in  God.  Awaking  the  next  morning,  I 
was  more  frightened  than  ever.  Thinking  perhaps 
a  walk  around  the  block  would  give  me  some  relief, 
I  put  on  my  cloak  and  hat  and  stood  ready  to  start, 
with  an  ill-boding  hesitation,  when  there  was  a 
knock  at  the  door.  After  a  moment's  delay,  think- 
ing perhaps  it  might  be  the  chambermaid,  I  sum- 


LEAVING    HOME.  37 

moned  courage  enough  to  unlock  the  door.  There 
stood  before  me  a  tall,  well  dressed,  dark  complex- 
ioned  man,  that  I  took  to  be  a  polygamist,  who,  in  a 
smooth,  soft  voice,  requested  the  privilege  of  speak- 
ing to  me.  Shutting  the  door  in  his  face,  and  lock- 
ing it  quickly,  I  sank  prostrate  on  the  floor.  For  a 
minute  I  was  terror  stricken,  when  a  voice  whis- 
pered :  "Where  is  your  God?"  I  was  soon  weeping 
for  joy,  realizing  that  the  eternal  God  was  my  ref- 
uge and  underneath  were  the  everlasting  arms. 
Rising  to  my  feet,  reassured,  I  made  bold  to  open 
the  door  and  walked  out  into  the  hall  to  look  for 
the  fiend  in  human  form,  but  he  was  no  where  to  be 
seen.  I  always  loved  the  old  hymn  with  its  strength- 
ening admonition,  that  fitted  so  well  here : 

"My  soul,  be  on  thy  guard; 

Ten  thousand  foes  arise; 
The  hosts  of  sin  are  pressing  hard 
To  draw  thee  from  the  skies. 

"O  watch,  and  fight,  and  pray;  . 
The  battle  ne'er  give  o'er; 
Renew  it  boldly  every  day, 
And  help  divine  implore." 

Only  a  part  of  the  passengers  could  be  accom- 
modated on  the  first  train  out.  The  gate  officers, 
were  examining  the  dates  on  the  tickets  and  were 
only  permitting  those  to  go  that  had  been  waiting 
the  longest.  Fearing  that  I  would  be  left,  I  asked 
the  Lord  to  touch  their  hearts  that  they  might  let 
me  go.  They  said:  "There  are  others  ahead  of 
you,  but  you  may  go  anyhow."  On  my  arrival  at 


38        LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

Dillon,  1  found  the  stage  going  out  to  Bannock  de- 
layed a  day  by  a  heavy  snow  storm. 

The  next  day,  on  the  stage  besides  myself, 
there  was  one  other  passenger — a  man  who  was 
rather  drowsy,  yet  somewhat  communicative.  He 
told  me  his  name  but  asked  me  not  to  mention  it  at 
Bannock,  as  he  wished  to  conceal  himself  for  a  few 
days  before  meeting  his  sister,  whom  he  had  not 
seen  for  many  years.  As  soon  as  I  had  met  my 
aunt  she  asked  me  if  this  man  was  on  the  stage, 
adding  that  his  sister  was  expecting  him  and  would 
be  disappointed  if  he  did  not  come.  A  few  minutes 
after  arriving  he  committed  suicide  in  the  hotel. 
The  grief  of  the  sister,  who  had  not  yet  met  her 
brother,  can  better  be  imagined  than  told.  She  now 
had  to  look  upon  him  in  his  own  blood 
and  tremble  before  the  awful  sin  that  was 
upon  his  departed  spirit.  The  same  day  a 
miner  was  found  dead  in  his  cabin,  and  from  all 
appearances  he,  too,  had  taken  his  own  life.  Some 
bitter  disappointments  in  earthly  things  had  led 
to  these  tragical  ends,  which  were  common  occur- 
rences in  early  western  life.  "He  died  with  his 
boots  on,"  they  said  of  such.  Two  days  later  the 
people  of  the  town  performed  the  last  sad  rites  that 
man  performs  for  man.  I,  with  them,  attended  a 
double  funeral — the  closing  scene  of  these  two  lives. 
I  could  not  help  but  think,  in  the  solemn  procession, 
to  the  graveyard,  of  the  homes  somewhere  that 
were  once  brightened  with  their  baby  innocence  and 
boyhood  life;  of  the  bond  of  brothers  and  sisters 
and  the  sweet  friendships  of  early  days,  and  of  the 


LEAVING   HOME.  39 

time  when  they  were  father's  and  mother's  hope  and 
joy.  The  remorseful  soul  haunted  by  these  mem- 
ories hastens  to  acts  of  desperation.  Persons  who 
committed  suicide,  in  these  early  days,  often  de- 
stroyed every  trace  that  would  lead  to  the  discovery 
of  their  relations,  doubtless  hoping  that  they  would 
never  hear  of  their  awful  end.  Probably  it  were 
better  that  they  never  knew,  than  to  weep  the  irre- 
parable fate  of  brother  and  son.  The  winds  among 
the  pines  sing  their  requiems  over  these  poor  un- 
fortunates of  the  west,  and  the  Rocky  Mountains 
gather  a  drapery  of  shadows  about  their  graves. 
Nature  closes  her  lips,  and  silently  stands  aloof,  far 
distant  from  the  old  eastern  homes  and  keeps  many 
dark  secrets  of  lost  boys — and  girls  too — in  her 
bosom.  I  wept  over  what  I  heard  and  saw  of  the 
slain  of  sin,  as  the  dead  were  laid  away  on  the 
mountain  side  to  await  the  judgment  morn.  I 
longed,  more  than  ever,  to  be  used  of  God  to  help 
save  the  perishing. 

Bannock  was  the  center  of  the  early  mining  ac- 
tivities of  Montana.  Here  still  stood,  in  Hangman's 
Gulch,  above  the  town,  the  scaffold  on  which  the 
Vigilantes  hung  some  of  the  noted  road  agents,  who 
were  the  terror  of  the  miner  with  his  booty.  They 
held  him  up  in  the  crowded  stage  coach,  or  alone 
with  his  pack  animal  on  some  mountain  trail.  I 
now  saw  in  man,  as  never  before,  his  thirst  for  gold 
and  the  curse  it  brought.  Many  sacrificed  honor, 
virtue  and  principal  to  possess  it,  and  like  Judas, 
some  Christians  that  came  west  sold  their  Christ. 
Paul  said  to  Timothy,  "The  love  of  money  is  a  root 


4O  LOOKINO  BACK  FROM 

of  all  kinds  of  evil :  which  some  reaching  after  have 
been  led  astray  from  the  faith,  and  have  pierced 
themselves  through  with  many  sorrows."  (I  Tim.. 
6:ioR.  V.) 


Rocky  Mountain  Stage,  Page  38. 


CHAPTER  IV. 

TEACHING      IN       MONTANA — INCIDENTAL,      EXPERI- 
ENCES— MASONIC  BALI, — CARD  PLAYING. 

The  next  Monday  after  my  arrival  in  Montana 
I  began  teaching  the  Bannock  school.  As 
was  my  custom,  I  opened  daily  with  prayer  and 
reading  of  the  Scripture.  The  performance  of  this 
devotional  exercise  was  always  a  cross,  yet  it 
brought  to  my  soul  the  sweetness  of  divine  ap- 
proval. Never  had  any  objections  to  it  been  made 
in  any  of  the  schools  where  I  had  taught  before. 
Now,  I  found  myself  confronted  with  the  likelihood 
of  trouble,  not  from  the  parents  of  the  children, 
but  from  two  infidel  trusteed.  My  uncle  said  from 
the  start  that  there  would  be  trouble.  I  continued, 
however,  though  the  cross  was  made  heavier 
through  fear. 

After  a  few  days  had  passed  a  message  came 
from  the  board  requesting  me  not  to  introduce  re- 
ligious exercises  in  the  school.  I  knew  that  God 
had  led  me  and  that  His  blessing  was  on  me  in  so 
doing,  but  Satan  was  wily  and  brought  strong  in- 
fluences to  bear  against  me.  First,  I  was  far  from 
home  and  without  money ;  then  there  was  the  prom- 
ise of  the  winter  term  with  an  increase  of  wages 
from  sixty  to  eighty  dollars  per  month ;  and  last, 
my  friends  were  urging  me  to  comply  with  the  re- 


41 


42  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

quest.  I  weakened  and  yielded.  When  the  an- 
nouncement was  made  that  the  opening  exercises 
would  be  omitted,  darkness  came  over  my  soul. 
Judging  from  my  feelings,  Satan  must  have  had  a 
jubilee  in  the  pit  over  his  victory.  The  children, 
formerly  well  behaved,  now  became  unruly  and 
everything  went  wrong  the  rest  of  the  term.  I 
wept  bitter  tears,  believing  God  would  have  come 
to  my  help,  had  I  but  persevered.  I  knew  that  my 
punishment  would  be  just  if  they  did  not  employ  me 
to  teach  the  winter  term,  and  fully  believed  that  the 
Lord  would  teach  me  a  lesson  that  would  not  be 
forgotten.  And  so  it  proved.  They  engaged  a  young 
man  to  teach  the  school  and  I  wras  left  without  em- 
ployment. 

Saturday,  March  3rd,  1883,  after  some  months 
had  passed,  I  was  sitting  upon  a  couch  by  the  win- 
dow. It  was  a  stormy  afternoon  and  I  was  some- 

.  "y 

what  depressed  in  spirits.  A  young  lady,  just  out 
from  Ohio,  and  the  young  man,  wrho  was  then 
teaching  the  school,  were  present.  They  were  en- 
gaged in  a  conversation  that  did  not  interest  me. 
Many  thoughts  were  going  through  my  mind  as  I 
wondered  how  much  longer  my  punishment  would 
last.  Looking  through  the  falling  snow  without, 
I  saw  a  young  man  approaching  the  gate  on  horse- 
back. He  dismounted  and  came  to  the  door.  As  I 
opened  it  and  looked  into  his  face  I  could  scarcely 
speak.  The  school  teacher,  seeing  my  con- 
fusion, invited  him  in.  He  introduced  him- 
self as  Kent  White,  and  said  that  he  had  come 
to  fill  an  appointment  for  Rev.  Van  Orsdale.  He 


TEACHING  EXPERIENCES.  43 

had  been  directed  to  my  uncle's  home  where  the 
ministers  were  usually  entertained.  The  cause  of 
my  confusion  will  appear  further  on. 

An  experience  two  years  before  in  Kentucky, 
somewhat  prepared  me  for  this  occasion.  A  young 
man  of  good  character,  who  owned  a  blue  grass 
farm,  came  to  our  neighborhood.  His  business  de- 
tained him  for  a  number  of  weeks.  During  the 
time  quite  a  friendship  sprang  up  between  us.  I 
had  not  sought  to  know  God's  will  concerning  it, 
and  He  rebuked  me  for  allowing  an  affection  to  be 
formed  for  another,  even  in  a  small  degree,  with- 
out consulting  Him.  I  had  a  sister  away  teach- 
ing school,  who  was  to  be  home  soon.  She  was 
charming  in  appearance  and  fascinated  nearly  all 
the  young  men  she  met. 

I  had  an  impression  that  when  he  met  her  his 
attentions  to  me  would  cease,  which  proved  true. 
From  this  experience,  God  taught  me,  as  never  be- 
fore, the  importance  of  being  wholly  led  by  His 
Spirit  in  the  formation  of  all  my  friendships.  In 
communion  with  Him  I  got  the  assurance  that  He 
would  choose  my  companion  for  life,  and  save  me 
from  the  hurtful  love  scrapes  and  painful  uncer- 
tainties that  young  people  are  subject  to  in  their 
worldly  course. 

The  school  teacher  was  entertaining  the  min- 
ister when  the  young  lady  beckoned  me  to  the  din- 
ing room  and  said,  "Now,  don't  you  fall  in  love 
with  the  young  preacher  for  I  will  guarantee  he  is 
married."  I  said,  "He  is  not  married."  She  asked, 
"How  do  you  know?  He  is  a  stranger  to  you." 


44  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

1  made  no  further  reply,  for  indeed  he  was  a 
stranger  to  me;  I  had  never  seen  him  before  nor 
even  heard  of  him,  but  it  came  to  me  when  I  met  him 
at  the  door  that  he  was  to  be  my  companion  in  life 
and  this  caused  my  confusion.  So  deeply  was  I 
impressed  by  the  Spirit  with  the  conviction  that  he 
was  to  be  my  husband  that  I  stayed  up  that  night 
in  meditation  and  prayer  till  one  o'clock.  So  definite 
were  some  of  God's  manifestations  to  me  in  the 
next  few  days  that  I  knew  if  His  plans  were  carried 
out  some  day  we  would  be  united  in  marriage.  But 
nearly  four  years  were  to  pass  before  that  time  came 
— four  years  before  the  engagement,  with  only  an 
occasional  letter  between  us.  In  the  meantime,  sev- 
eral young  men,  some  of  them  Christians,  some  of 
wealth  and  position,  sought  my  company  with  the 
manifest  intention  of  marriage.  In  encouraging- 
any  of  them,  a  cloud  would  come  between  me  and 
God,  which  was  not  removed  until  my  promise  was 
renewed  not  to  encourage  any  attention  or  affection 
contrary  to  His  will.  This  course  brought  severe 
testings,  but  I  came  through  the  ordeal  victorious. 
As  the  fulfillment  of  God's  promises  to  Abraham 
were  preceded  by  great  trials  of  his  faith,  so  He  dealt 
with  me,  building  me  up  in  Himself,  before  He 
brought  about  our  engagement  and  marriage.  Mr. 
White  remained  at  Bannock  three  days.  Before  leav- 
ing he  proposed  to  supply  the  literature  for  a  Sabbath 
School,  if  I  would  start  one  in  the  church.  The 
children  were  soon  assembled  on  the  Sabbath,  and 
not  being  able  to  get  any  one  to  assist  me,  I  taught 
the  whole  school  in  one  class.  This  I  did  for  a  num- 


TEACHING    EXPERIENCES.  45 

ber  of  months,  when  I  left  to  teach  school  near 
Dillon,  and  the  Sabbath  School  was  disbanded. 

After  the  lesson  God  had  taught  me  in  my 
first  experience  as  a  teacher  in  Montana,  there  was 
no  hesitation  to  open  daily  with  devotional  exercises, 
regardless  of  the  consequences.  Later,  as  will  be 
seen,  I  waged  a  battle  with  the  enemies  of  Christian 
teaching  in  another  school  and  won.  "Thanks  be 
unto  God,  which  always  causeth  us  to  triumph  in 
Christ." 

I  accepted  an  invitation  to  attend  the  Methodist 
Conference  at  Butte  City  in  August,  1883,  where 
I  was  entertained  by  one  of  my  uncles  then  in  that 
city.  Here  I  again  met  Mr.  White,  who  was  mak- 
ing preparations  tc  attend  the  University  at  Den- 
ver. He  spent  one  day  at  Dillon  on  his  way  to  Col- 
orado. This  was  the  last  we  saw  of  each  other 
tor  nearly  two  years. 

I  boarded  with  the  family  of  J.  F.  Bishop  while 
teaching  a  fall  and  winter  school  eight  miles  north 
at  Dillon. 

Mr.  Bishop  was  an  interesting  conversational- 
ist and  was  well  posted  in  the  political  history  of 
the  country.  He  being  a  Republican  from  New 
York  and  I  a  Democrat  from  Kentucky,  our  views 
naturally  clashed  and  we  had  some  lively  times.  In 
the  most  animated  conversation  he  showed  the  true 
characteristics  of  a  northern  man.  Well  fortified 
in  his  position  he  maintained  his  composure  and 
never  yielded  a  point.  I  saw  in  our  natures  the  two 
forces  that  were  arrayed  against  each  other  in  the 
war,  that  caused  the  first  gun  to  be  fired  at  Fort 


46        LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

Sumpter,  and  hung  on  through  the  four  years  of 
bloody  conflict.  This  was  my  first  association  with 
northern  people.  In  my  childhood  I  was  taught  to 
look  upon  them  with  suspicion,  and  any  one  wearing 
the  so-called  "Lincoln  Blue"  as  a  traitor  and  an  en- 
emy. The  South  at  that  time,  with  a  great  loss  of 
blood  and  property,  had  just  staggered  from  the 
battle  field  in  the  bitterness  of  defeat,  with  what 
they  considered  the  dreadful  calamity  of  a  race  of 
freed  slaves  among  them.  Back  in  my  home  in 
Kentucky  I  had  oftened  listened  to  the  rehearsal  of 
war  stories  by  our  neighbors,  and  the  men  that  had 
worn  the  gray  as  they  gathered  of  evenings  around 
our  fireside.  They  felt  the  injustice  of  the  North, 
and  the  wrong  it  had  inflicted  on  the  South  rankled 
in  the  bosom  of  our  people.  I  then  saw  through 
the  eye-glass  of  one  south  of  Mason  and  Dixon's 
line,  and  was  loyal  to  my  father's  convictions,  who 
was  a  typical  Southerner.  But  now  realizing  more 
fully  that  our's  was  a  lost  cause,  in  the  ruling  of 
Providence,  I  found  my  prejudices  gradually  giv- 
ing way  under  a  northern  view  of  things.  I  wrote 
to  my  father,  telling  him  that  I  had  come  to  the 
conclusion  that  Abraham  Lincoln  was  not  such  a 
bad  man  after  all.  He  immediately  replied,  asking 
"What  kind  of  people  are  you  among  out  there? 
I  want  you  to  come  home.  I  would  as  soon  you 
were  in  Iceland  among  devils." 

During  this  winter  I  did  some  personal  work  in 
a  revival  meeting  held  by  Bros.  Riggan  and  Van 
Orsdale  at  Dillon.  There  were  some  genuine  con- 
versions. Kneeling  by  a  woman,  who  was  weeping 


TEACHING  EXPERIENCES.  47 

bitterly,  the  Spirit  enabled  me  to  lead  her  into  the 
light.  Her  clear  testimony  and  shining  face  was 
evidence  to  all  that  the  change  had  taken  place.  This 
sister  only  lived  a  few  weeks  after  her  conversion. 
The  evangelists  frequently  called  on  me  to  pray,  and 
often  people  took  my  hand  and  told  me  they  had 
been  benefited  by  my  prayers.  Among  them  was  an 
ex-prize  fighter,  who  said,  as  the  tears  trickled  down 
his  great  cheeks,  that  his  heart  had  never  been 
touched  before.  An  old  lady  came  to  my  uncle's 
house  to  tell  me  how  I  had  helped  her.  In  this  the 
Lord  so  blest  and  encouraged  me  that  I  would 
gladly  have  given  my  whole  time  to  the  work,  if  the 
way  had  been  open. 

The  people  were  generally  given  up  to  world- 
liness,  and  from  time  to  time  devised  plans  to  draw 
me  into  their  amusements.  Card  playing  and  dan- 
cing were  the  order  of  the  day.  At  Bannock  they 
came  very  near  entrapping  me.  There  was  a  Ma- 
sonic ball  in  the  town.  A  big  supper  was  to  be 
served.  People  came  for  miles  to  attend  it,  and  all 
the  hotels  and  boarding  houses  were  full.  A  friend 
of  my  uncle  came  to  spend  the  earlier  part  of  the 
evening  with  us.  He  did  not  care  to  go  to  the  ball, 
but  insisted  en  my  frcing  with  him  to  the  supper. 
Uncle  and  aunt  could  see  nothing  wrong  in  it  and 
were  persuaded  to  go  themselves.  I  finally  con- 
sented, but  felt  much  out  of  place,  and  soon  regretted 
that  I  was  there.  Supper  over, 

"Music  rose  with  its   voluptuous  swell." 
as  the  sensual  poet  expresses  it,  thereby  ackno\vl- 


48  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

edging  that,  in  the  dance,  it  is  the  carnality  of  the 
occasion  that  is  the  attractive  part  of  it.  The  dancers 
were  gathering  and  forming  into  sets.  They  insist- 
ed on  my  just  looking  on  for  a  little  while ;  yielding, 
I  reached  the  door  and  was  soon  seated  and  gazing 
on  the  partially  nude  forms  of  the  women.  There 
was  a  strange  fascination  about  the  whole  affair. 
I  received  many  pressing  invitations  to  dance,  but 
steadfastly  declined  them.  After  we  had  been  there 
a  short  time  I  desired  to  go,  but  my  aunt  insisted 
on  staying  a  little  while  longer.  It  was  two  o'clock 
in  the  morning  before  we  left  the  house.  Once  more 
on  the  outside,  I  felt  like  a  bird  that  had  escaped 
the  serpent's  charm,  and  could  see  how  un- 
stable souls  were  easily  drawn  on  to  spiritual  and 
moral  ruin. 

Long  before  the  midnight  hour  young  men 
who  had  come  there  sober  were  reeling  around  the 
floor  intoxicated.  The  dancing  commenced  with  the 
old-fashioned  quadrille,  but  as  the  excitement  and 
delirium  increased  this  did  not  satisfy,  and  their 
only  enjoyment  was  found  in  the  lustful  embrace 
of  the  round  dance.  Husbands  and  wives  became 
jealous  of  each  other,  and  afterwards  found  that 
that  night's  experience  had  led  them  to  the  verge  of 
separation.  Young  girls,  who  in  the  earlier  part  of 
the  evening  had  shown  some  degree  of  modesty, 
became  coquettish  and  bold.  The  odor  of  liquor  per- 
meated the  atmosphere. 

My  father  was  a  Free  Mason,  and  I  was 
brought  up  to  believe  that  the  Masonic  Lodge  was 
a  good  thing.  Here  I  saw  drunkards,  infidels,  bias- 


TEACHING    EXPERIENCES.  49 

phemers,  adulterers  and  liars  wearing  the  badge, 
and  among  them  those  who  had  refused  to  allow 
me  to  read  the  Bible  and  pray  in  the  school.  I  had 
paid  out  about  $100  of  my  own  money  on  an  in- 
surance policy  that  my  father  had  taken  out  in  the 
lodge,  and  at  this  time  was  paying  the  tax  on 
the  monthly  death  roll.  After  this  1  informed  my 
parents  that  I  would  no  longer  keep  up  the  pay- 
ments, as.  I  thought  it  inconsistent  with  the  Chris- 
tian life. 

My  father's  regalia  was  kept  in  the  bottom  of 
a  trunk  and  looked  upon  as  being  almost  sacred. 
It  was  made  of  white  and  blue  satin  and  beauti- 
fully trimmed  with  gold  and  silver  tinsel.  When- he 
became  a  Christian  he  lost  interest  in  the  lodge  and 
never  wore  it  again. 

After  returning  to  Kentucky  I  took  the  trim- 
mings off  and  made  them  into  flower  vases.  Some 
professing  Christians,  and  even  holiness  people,  say 
they  can  see  no  harm  in  carrying  an  insurance  policy 
in  a  lodge.  This  one  night's  experience,  with  the 
little  spiritual  light  I  then  had,  forever  settled  the 
question  in  my  mind.  Lodges,  with  their  ungodly 
associations  and  insurance  policies,  are  earthly  props 
on  which  no  Christian  has  any  right  to  lean. 

In  almost  every  home  a  pack  of  cards  could  be 
found.  The  sight  of  them  always  brought  to  my 
mind  a  picture  of  their  associations  with  saloons, 
brothels  and  gambling  hells.  Mother  had  taught  me 
to  shun  them  as  I  would  a  poisonous  serpent.  I 
wondered  how  anybody  who  had  respect  for  them- 
selves or  loved  ones,  could  have  them  about. 


5O  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

The  sin  of  gamblng,  the  art  of  getting  some- 
thing for  nothing,  is  rapidly  on  the  increase  in  the 
land.  It  is  reported  that  four  millions  of  dollars 
was  lost  and  won  in  bets  on  the  result  of  the  recent 
Presidential  election.  Nine-tenths  of  the  defalca- 
tions, embezzlements  and  similar  expressions  of  of- 
fical  dishonesty,  are  found  to  take  their  rise  in  one 
form  or  another  of  deliberate  gambling.  Dishonesty, 
deception  and  trickery  are  early  hatched  out  in  the 
heart  by  cards.  Gamblers,  lately,  have  told  us  with 
tears  that  their  bondage  was  greater  and  their  condi- 
tion more  hopeless  than  the  habitual  drunkard.  It  is 
estimated  that  nine-tenths  of  all  gambling  is  done 
at  the  card  table,  which  is  the  most  common,  potent 
and  subtle  instrument  of  hell  for  this  nefarious 
work.  Satan  owns  the  cards.  He  has  adopted  them 
as  an  agent  of  destruction.  Look  at  them  as  they 
are  played  with  a  nervous  twitch  and  dealt  out  with 
an  oath;  their  secret  habitation  an  old  tobacco 
pocket!  When  in  use  they  are  encircled  with  to- 
bacco smoke  and  the  breath  of  stomachs  loaded  with 
whiskey  and  beer.  They  move  where  the  beings  of 
men  are  wrought  up  to  an  awful  tension,  where  the 
thunder  clouds  of  wrath  gather,  where  the  lightning 
of  the  eye  of  anger  flashes,  and  where  is  heard  in 
muttered  profanation  the  name  of  the  Most  High. 
More  than  homes  and  fortunes  are  lost  at  cards. 
Men  gamble  away  virtue,  honor  and  manhood,  yea, 
even  their  own  souls.  On  the  card  we  can  read  dis- 
honesty, hate,  revenge,  murder,  suicide  and  lost 
souls.  Is  it  any  wonder  that  we  are  told  that  sol- 
diers going  into  battle,  and  sailors  in  shipwrecks, 


TEACHING    EXPERIENCES.  51 

are  seen  stealthily  throwing  away  their  cards.  They 
shrink  from  going  into  the  presence  of  death  with 
fche  devil's  prayerbook  on  their  person.  Is  not  the 
very  sight  of  thenTto  be  detested  by  good  people 
and  should  not  the  social  game,  the  great  feeder  of 
the  gambling  house,  receive  the  strongest  denun- 
ciation? But  notwithstanding  all  this  there  were 
people  in  Dillon  who  thought  themselves  respect- 
able, and  even  professing  to  be  Christians,  that, 
played  cards.  Some  of  them  were  school  teachers, 
"employed  in  the  public  schools,  who  sat  up  until  two 
or  three  o'clock  in  the  morning  playing  "progressive 
euchre."  Sam  Jones  more  appropriately  calls  it 
"progressive  damnation."  Some  of  the  young  con- 
verts from  the  revival  meetings  were  unable  to  stand 
against  the  tide  of  worldliness,  kept  up  by  these 
dancing,  card-playing,  hypocritical  church  members, 
who  were  like  an  infectious  sore  on  the  community. 
Then,  too,  no  sooner  had  the  revival  fires  subsided 
in  a  measure  than  they  begun  their  church  fairs  and 
festivals.  If  the  cry  should  go  forth,  "Behold  the 
Bridegroom  cometh,"  they  would  be  found  among 
those  calling  for  the  rocks  and  hills  to  fall  on  them. 
The  Rev.  R.  F.  Killgore,  once  prominent  in  the 
gambling  world,  who  traversed  the  continent  and 
crossed  the  ocean  in  his  gambling  tours,  not  long 
ago  preached  for  a  week  in  our  Denver  Mission  and 
set  forth  the  midnight  horrors  of  blood  and  anguish 
found  in  such  a  life.  For  the  good  of  those,  and 
especially  for  parents  who  believe  there  is  not  much 
harm  in  the  social  game  of  cards,  we  print  an  ex- 
cerpt from  his  biography. 


52  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

HOW  A  NOTED  GAMBLER  STARTED. 

"While  in  the  city  of  Cincinnati  I  contracted 
the  evil  habits  that  afterwards  designated  me  as  the 
devil's  own.  I  knew  not  the  taste  of  intoxicants, 
and  did  not  know  one  card  from  another  when  I  left 
my  Virginia  home.  I  was  taught  to  shuffle  and  play 
my  first  game  of  cards  in  a  Presbyterian  home,  by 
a  member  of  that  church,  a  daughter  of  that  home. 
My  first  night  in  this  home,  where  I  lived  during 
the  six  years  of  my  stay  in  that  city,  cards  were 
played.  I  do  not  think  it  prevaricating,  or  in  the 
least  an  extravagant  assertion,  when  I  say  there 
were  cards  played  in  that  so-called  Christian  home 
every  night  (Sundays  excepted)  the  year  round.  I 
never  heard  a  prayer  offered  during  my  stay  there. 
Well  do  I  remember  the  night  of  March  2 1  st,  as  the 
father  sat  by  the  bright  lamp,  mother,  son  and  two 
daughters  at  the  card  table,  as  I  sat  off  to  myself 
reading  a  book,  trying  to  bury  in  thought  the  scenes 
that  imaginatively  arose  before  my  gaze,  when  Miss 
Nellie  said:  'Perhaps  the  young  gentleman  will 
take  part  in  the  game.'  'No,'  said  I,  'I  don't  know 
anything  about  cards;  was  never  allowed  to  handle 
them  in  my  home,  as  my  people  are  Christians  and 
members  of  the  church.'  This  was  a  Schley  bomb 
in  the  Presbyterian  camp.  All  eyes  were  riveted  on 
me  at  once.  'Well,'  said  the  strike-back  girl,  'we 
are  Christians  and  members  of  the  church,  and  if 
it  were  sinful  to  play  a  social  game  of  cards,  we 
certainly  would  not  indulge.'  'Very  well,  excuse 
me,  I  am  no  Christian,  but  I  don't  play  cards.' 
'You're  excusable.'  'Yesum.' 


TEACHING  EXPERIENCES.  53 

"Three  months  rolled  by.  I  learned  to  love  the 
family,  especially  the  girls.  Night  after  night  they 
pleaded  with  me  to  take  part  in  what  they  termed 
their  innocent  amusement.  At  the  end  of  the  third 
month,  I  took  my  seat  at  the  table  by  the  side  of  her 
whose  jeweled  hand  shuffled  and  selected  my  first 
card  to  play.  There  was  no  attraction  in  the  game 
for  me,  because  of  my  blindness  to  see  through  or 
comprehend.  But  oh !  the  words  of  instruction  from 
Nellie's  lips  were  music  to  my  ear,  her  gentle  smiles 
to  me  were  enough  to  bleach  the  ace  of  spades.  As 
time  passed  on  from  that  night,  more  and  more  I 
thought  of  and  enjoyed  both  the  company  of  the 
girls  and  the  game.  At  length  their  skill  as  carders 
was  not  sufficient  to  entertain  me,  hence  I  sought 
higher  game.  I  went  to  the  bar  room  for  amuse- 
ment, which  led  to  drink,  thence  to  drunkenness, 
blood  and  death.  While  no  one  fills  the  grave  from 
my  hand,  I  have  heard  the  crack  of  the  revolver 
around  the  card  table  where  parlor  manufactured 
gamblers  meet.  I  have  seen  men  of  noble  parentage 
go  down  in  blood,  I  have  heard  the  shrieks  of  the 
poor  dying  gambler  as  he  closed  his  eyes  to  open 
them  in  hell.  When  I  left  Cincinnati,  I  left  as  a 
gambler,  educated  as  such  in  a  Christian  family." 


CHAPTER  5. 

AT  HOME  IN  SCHOOL OVERWORK MISSIONARY  IN 

UTAH — TESTINGS. 

The  time  came  for  my  return  home.  On  the 
1 3th  day  of  May,  1884,  after  an  absence  of  a  little 
more  than  two  years,  I  left  Montana  for  Kentucky. 
I  reached  home,  to  find  many  changes  had  taken 
place  in  this  short  interval  of  time.  My  oldest  sis- 
ter had  died,  leaving  seven  motherless  children,  five 
of  whom  were  living  with  father  and  mother. 
Mother  was  careworn  and  looked  much  older 
than  when  I  left.  She  had  raised  a  large 
family  of  her  own  and  now  had  taken  the  burden 
of  these  grandchildren.  She  was  relieved  of 
three  of  them,  however,  a  few  months  later. 
My  oldest  brother  and  one  sister  had  mar- 
ried and  left  home.  The  summer  season  was  just 
opening  and  there  was  a  great  deal  of  sewing  to 
be  done,  which  kept  me  at  the  machine  for  six 
weeks,  scarcely  taking  time  for  my  meals.  I  entered 
the  female  college  in  the  fall,  tired  and  worn  out 
with  the  summer's  work,  taking  five  studies  besides 
music.  The  faculty  said  I  would  break  down,  and 
insisted  on  my  not  doing  so  much.  Believing  that 
this  year  would  end  my  school  days,  I  wished  to  ac- 
complish all  that  was  possible. 

At  the  close  of  this  year  of  hard  study  I  be- 

54 


MISSIONARY     IX     UTAH.  55 

came  alarmed  over  the  spiritual  dearth  through 
which  I  was  passing,  when  a  letter  came  from  Mr. 
White  telling  of  the  wonderful  outpouring  of  the 
Spirit  in  the  Harrison  meeting  in  Denver,  and  also 
relating  an  incident  of  a  young  woman  entering  the 
Canaan  of  rest.  He  assured  me  it  was  my  privilege 
to  have  this  blessing,  and  urged  me  to  take  a  sim- 
ilar step.  One  night,  conscious  of  my  great  need, 
I  waited  quite  a  while  before  God  in  prayer  for  a 
new  token  of  His  favor.  After  retiring,  before 
closing  my  eyes  in  sleep,  He  opened  the  heavens  and 
poured  out  a  great  blessing  upon  me. 

I  had  now  prepared  to  return  to  Montana.  Be- 
fore leaving  home  I  wrote  to  Mr.  White  at  Denver 
that  I  expected  to  pass  through  the  city  and  would 
probably  spend  a  few  hours  between  the  trains.  He 
received  the  letter,  but  misunderstanding  the  time 
of  my  arrival,  did  not  expect  to  meet  me,  as  he  had 
to  leave  the  city  immediately,  and  supposed  that  I 
would  not  arrive  until  several  days  later.  I  had 
given  up  seeing  him  when  he  walked  into  the  wait- 
ing room  accompanied  by  Evangelist  Thomas  Har- 
rison. It  was  a  Providential  meeting.  Finding,  on 
examining  my  ticket  that  I  could  stay  over  until 
the  next  day,  he  insisted  on  my  remaining  and  seeing 
something  of  Denver. 

During  the  day  I  met  his  pastor,  Rev.  I.  H. 
Beardsley,  some  of  whose  relatives  I  had  known  in 
Kentucky.  He  and  his  wife  kindly  invited  me  to 
stay  with  them  over  night.  Mr.  White  took  me 
about  the  city  next  day,  and  improved  the  time  in 
talking  to  me  on  the  subject  of  holiness.  Before 


56  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

leaving,  that  afternoon,  we  knelt  together  in  the 
old  St.  James  M.  E.  Church,  while  he  prayed  that 
I  might  receive  the  blessing.  At  that  time  I  had 
only  a  vague  idea  of  sanctification,  and  did  not  know 
that  it  meant  the  destruction  of  the  carnal  nature. 
Bro.  Godbey  had  talked  about  it,  and  left  some 
books  at  our  house  on  the  subject,  and  said  he  had 
preached  the  gospel  many  years  before  he  received 
it.  It  looked  like  folly  for  me  to  expect  so  much  in 
so  short  a  time  after  my  conversion.  While  pray- 
ing, I  received  a  blessing,  but  doubted  that  it  was 
sanctification  and  therefore  did  not  testify  to  it. 

After  my  arrival  in  Dillon,  Montana,  I  learned 
that  the  district  schools,  both  in  town  and  country, 
had  all  been  taken.  I  owed  seventy-five  dollars  and 
had  but  little  change  in  my  pocket.  The  Methodist 
Conference  was  then  in  session  at  the  place.  At  the 
love  feast,  I  testified  to  having  received  a  great  bless- 
ing, which  led  Dr.  T.  C.  Iliff,  Superintendent  of  the 
Utah  M.  E.  mission  work,  who  was  present,  and 
looking  for  teachers  for  the  Salt  Lake  Seminary,  to 
make  inquiries  about  me. 

My  uncle  and  aunt  were  about  to  move  to  their 
ranch  for  the  summer,  expecting  to  rent  or  lock  up 
their  house  in  towrn.  My  sister  Nora,  who  at  my 
aunt's  first  invitation  had  refused  to  go  to  Montana, 
decided  to  go  after  my  return  to  Kentucky,  and 
preceded  me  a  few  months  on  my  second  trip, 
and  was  invited  to  spend  her  vacation  on  the  ranch. 
The  fact  that  the  schools  were  all  taken,  and  that  I 
had  no  money  and  no  place  to  stay,  seemed  to  be 
overlooked  by  all.  My  extremity  was  reached  and 


MISSIONARY    IN    UTAH.  57 

I  had  no  one  to  lean  upon  but  God.  Praying  contin- 
ually for  three  days,  I  felt  that  a  crisis  was  near, 
when  opening  the  Bible  my  eyes  fell  on  the  words, 
"Consider  the  lilies  of  the  field  how  they  grow ;  they 
toil  not,  neither  do  they  spin ;  yet  I  say  unto  you,  that 
even  Solomon  in  all  his  glory  was  not  arrayed  like 
one  of  these."  When  I  reached  the  verse,  "O  ye  of 
little  faith !  Be  not  therefore  anxious,  saying,  What 
shall  we  eat?  or,  What  shall  we  drink?  or,  Where- 
withall  shall  we  be  clothed?"  my  eyes  were  so  filled 
with  tears  I  could  read  no  further.  O  how  I  now 
became  conscious  of  His  loving  and  watchful  care 
over  me !  How  gently  He  chided  me  for  my  lack  of 
faith !  "Be  not  therefore  anxious  for  the  morrow ; 
for  the  morrow  will  be  anxious  for  itself. "  Sufficient 
unto  the  day  is  the  evil  thereof."  (Math.  6:28-34. 
R.  V.)  Great  peace  came  into  my  soul.  I  knew 
that  God  had  spoken  directly  to  me  through  His 
-word.  Perhaps  only  ten  minutes  elapsed  when  a 
knock  was  heard  on  the  front  door.  It  was  Dr.  Iliff. 
He  said :  "I  understand  you  are  a  school  teacher, 
and  I  have  come  to  ask  you  if  you  would  accept  a 
position  in  the  Salt  Lake  Seminary."  One  can 
imagine  the  joy  of  my  heart,  which  was  artfully  con- 
cealed. I  was  to  leave  September  first  for  the  new 
field  of  labor. 

Secure  for  the  fall  and  winter,  I  was  still  in  a 
dilemma  to  know  what  to  do  the  intervening  two 
months,  when  a  man  called  with  a  note  from  a  coun- 
try school  teacher  desiring  me  to  finish  her  school  as 
she  wished  to  visit  the  National  Park.  In  a  few  days 
I  was  enjoying  the  quietness  of  ranch  life.  As  I  had 


58  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

only  a  small  number  of  pupils  there  was  ample  oppor- 
tunity to  rest  my  nerves.  Out-door  exercise,  horse- 
back riding,  etc.,  was  just  the  thing  necessary  to 
prepare  me  for  the  year's  work  ahead.  On  counting 
up  my  expenses  I  found  that  I  would  not  have  money 
enough,  after  paying  my  board,  to  buy  my  ticket  to 
Salt  Lake  City.  I  did  not  tell  any  one  this  and  was 
wondering  how  to  get  through.  When  I  offered  the 
lady  the  money  for  my  board  she  turned  her  back 
and  said,  "I  can't  take  it  from  you."  I  insisted,  but 
could  not  prevail  on  her  to  accept  it.  Her  only  ex- 
cuse was,  that  I  had  helped  her  with  the  dishes  a 
few  times,  which  was  no  more  than  the  other  teacher 
had  done,  whom  she  had  charged. 

My  sister  accompanied  me  to  Utah  and  taught 

the  mission  school  at  Tooele.     The  Rev.   G , 

whom  I  had  met  in  Butte  City,  had  been  appointed 
principal  of  the  seminary  in  which  I  was  to  teach. 
He  and  his  wife  had  charge  of  Davis  Hall,  where 
the  teachers  and  many  of  the  students  boarded.  He 
charged  me  more  for  board  than  any  one  else  in  the 
school,  of  w*hich  I  was  ignorant  for  several  weeks. 
When  asked  to  explain,  he  declined  to  do  so,  and  re- 
fused to  make  any  reduction.  Brother  and  Sister 
Iliff  then  invited  me  to  spend  the  rest  of  the  term  at 
their  home.  The  principal  \vas  not  pleased  with  this,- 
and  manifested  a  wrong  spirit  towards  me  the  rest 
of  the  year.  The  pastor  of  the  church  and  his  fam- 
ily also  boarded  at  the  hall.  He  was  a  native  of  New 
Jersey  and  a  warm  friend  of  the  principal.  His  ser- 
mons were  largely  illustrated  with  incidents  from  the 
late  civil  war,  many  of  which  would  have  been  more 


MISSIONARY    IN    UTAH.  59 

appropriately  left  out,  unless  he  wished  to  arouse  a 
spirit  of  antagonism  in  some  of  the  members  of  his 
congregation.  I  made  this  statement  to  a  friend 
who  repeated  it  in  his  hearing.  When  he  met  me 
he  severely  reprimanded  me  for  having  the  spiritof 
criticism.  He  said  if  it  were  not  for  my  southern 
prejudices  I  would  appreciate  him  more.  Unwilling 
to  accept  his  statement  in  full,  I  admitted  that  there 
might  be  something  in  it. 

I  taught  in  the  primary  department  in  a  crowded 
room  with  an  enrollment  of  over  sixty.  Extra  seats 
had  been  provided  and  rilled  up.  My  crowded  room 
became  a  problem  for  solution.  The  next  grade 
above  had  a  light  attendance  and  might  have  shared 
the  burden.  At  this  juncture,  in  walked  two  colored 
girls  who  had  been  assigned  to  my  room  by  the 
principal.  One  was  much  larger  than  the  average 
pupil  of  my  department.  Instantly  it  flashed  upon 
me  that  they  had  been  sent  there  on  purpose,  and  that 
I  must  yield  to  it  or  resign  my  position.  I  deter- 
mined not  to  let  a  word  escape  my  lips  that  I  might 
have  cause  to  regret.  I  had  been  taught  that  it  was  a 
disgrace  to  teach  colored  people  and  there  were  no 
mixed  schools  in  the  south.  Understanding  now  the 
real  feeling  the  principal  and  others  had  against  me, 
it  pierced  my  heart  like  an  arrow  and  the  tears 
flowed.  As  I  passed  out  of  the  building,  at  noon  they 
gave  me  a  look  that  said,  "I  wonder  how  she  is  tak- 
ing it  ?"  When  they  heard  that  I  had  been  weeping 
they  said,  "That  shows  how  much  of  a  Christian  she 
is."  Brother  and  Sister  Iliff  showed  more  sympathy, 
and  told  them  it  reflected  on  their  Christian  charity 


6O  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

to  impose  the  children  upon  me,  knowing  my  south- 
ern education.  In  a  few  hours  the  victory  was  won, 
and  I  found  it  no  cross  at  all,  but  rather  a  pleasure 
to  teach  the  colored  children.  I  found  that  all  things 
were  working  for  my  good,  and  that  in  this  the 
Lord  was  breaking  down  my  prejudices. 

The  Sabbath  School  had  planned  for  a  large 
Christmas  tree  and  the  teachers  in  the  institution 
were  invited  to  unite  their  efforts  to  make  it  a  suc- 
cess. One  of  the  Sunday-school  teachers  was  put  in 
charge  who  was  wearing  mourning  for  a  relative, 
and  passing  herself  off  as  a  real  widow  when  her  hus- 
band was  not  dead.  She  was  of  commanding  pres- 
ence and  taught  a,  class  of  young  men  and  women, 
most  of  whom  were  senior  students  in  the  school. 
The  kindergarten  teacher  and  myself  had  planned 
previously  to  combine  our  departments  and  give  the 
children  a  tree  of  their  own.  As  many  of  them  were 
poor,  and  some  of  them  almost  destitute  of  clothing, 
we  had  solicited  from  the  dry  goods  stores  a  large 
assortment  of  winter  garments  and  had  spent  much 
time  in  drilling  the  children  in  songs  and  recitations. 
They  were  looking  forward  to  the  exercises  with 
eager  anticipation,  when  the  woman  in  charge  of  the 
Sunday-school  tree  sent  word  to  us  to  drop  our  plans 
and  unite  our  efforts  with  them.  As  this  would 
necessitate  the  abandonment  of  our  exercises,  and  be 
a  great  disappointment  to  our  little  folks,  we  refused 
to  comply.  The  kindergarten  teacher  was  an  apos- 
tate from  the  Mormon  church,  and  while  having  no 
definite  religious  convictions,  had  a  keen  sense  of 
the  injustice  of  the  demand,  and  showed  no  disposi- 


MISSIONARY    IN    UTAH.  6l 

tion  to  yield  to  the  caprice  of  this  woman,  who,  in- 
stead of  coming  to  us  herself,  had  sent  others  at  dif- 
ferent times,  and  among  them  the  pastor  of  the 
church,  who  criticised  us  and  cast  reflections  on  my 
Christianity.  Stung  with  his  remarks,  I  gave  way 
and  said  some  unkind  things,  much  to  my  sorrow 
and  regret,  after  which  he  left  me  with  an  air  of  satis- 
faction. The  enemy  had  the  victory  and  I  knew  it. 
Many  battles  had  been  fought,  with  inward  and  out- 
ward foes,  and  had  been  won.  Now,  while  I  had 
said  nothing  but  the  truth,  I  might  have  said  it  in  a 
different  way,  or  kept  silent  altogether,  which  would 
have  shown  greater  wisdom.  My  heart  became  more 
sorely  grieved  as  I  remembered  the  prophet's  words, 
"As  a  lamb  that  is  led  to  the  slaughter,  and  as  a 
sheep  that  before  her  shearers  is  dumb,  yea,  He  open- 
ed not  His  mouth."  Feeling  that  the  failure  to  show 
a  true  Christian  spirit  was  inexcusable,  I  prayed  more 
earnestly  for  grace  to  overcome  in  every  time  of  need, 
and  especially  when  taken  by  surprise  by  a  Metho- 
dist preacher.  The  news  reached  the  superintend- 
ent's ears  when  he  returned  to  the  city.  He  looked 
troubled  and  said  in  ray  presence,  "I  wish  I  had  a 
corps  of  teachers  who  had  salvation  enough  to  keep 
sweet,"  and  added  that  there  was  only  one  exception 
to  the  number,  naming  a  person  in  whom  I  had 
failed  to  see  any  signs  of  spiritual  life  whatever.  She 
was  cold  and  precise  in  her  manner,  and  when  at- 
tempting to  speak  or  pray  had  only  a  form  of  words. 
It  was  hard  to  be  underrated  in  this  way,  and  yet 
my  punishment  was  just. 

A  few  weeks  after  this,  a  young  lady  pupil 


62  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

brought  me  a  note  written  by  the  oldest  son  of  the 
pastor  to  herself,  which  in  its  moral  tone  did  neither 
credit  to  himself  nor  his  parents.  She  asked  me  with 
tears  in  her  eyes  what  she  must  do.  I  told  her  to 
take  it  to  the  principal.  After  school  closed  in  the 
afternoon,  I  met  the  young  man's  father  in  the  hall, 
who  asked  abruptly  why  I  had  not  brought  that  note 
to  him  instead  of  letting  it  fall  into  the  hands  of  the 
principal.  I  told  him  that  I  did  not  think  of  him  at 
all  and  supposed  I  had  sent  it  to  the  proper  person. 
He  was  much  disturbed  and  said  I  had  not  shown  a 
Christ-like  spirit.  I  supposed  the  principal  would  jus- 
tify me  at  least,  only  to  learn  that  Pilot  and  Herod 
—for  a  while  not  on  good  terms — had  made  friends 
and  both  stood  solidly  against  me. 

On  Sunday  evening  the  pastor  preached  again, 
illustrating  his  sermon,  as  usual,  with  incidents  from 
the  civil  war,  which  was  meant  to  cast  reflections  on 
the  southern  people.  I  told  the  principal  that  his 
sermons  would  be  more  edifying  if  those  things  were 
left  out.  A  few  days  later  I  met  the  pastor  in  the 
parlor.  He  said  he  had  heard  that  I  was  criticising 
his  sermons  again,  and  it  showed  that  I  was  not 
right  with  God.  My  former  experience  caused  me 
to  speak  more  guardedly  and  I  tried  not  to  answer 
back.  I  evaded  coming  to  an  issue  with  him  at  the 
time,  but  the  subject  still  being  agitated  he  sent  for 
me  to  come  to  his  study. 

After  listening  to  a  number  of  accusations,  in 
which  I  knew  the  principal  figured,  it  seemed  impos- 
sible to  hold  my  peace  any  longer.  Had  they  not 
been  ministers  in  good  standing  in  the  M.  E.  Church 


MISSIONARY    IN    UTAH.  63 

I  could  have  borne  it  better,  but  this  made  it  more 
trying.  I  told  him  that  during  my  few  months  of 
acquaintance  with  him  I  had  found  him  bigotted, 
selfish  and  overbearing.  Losing  his  self-control  he 
declared  that  no  one  living  had  ever  dared  talk  thus 
to  him..  He  said  his  dignity  as  the  pastor  of  the 
church  had  been  highly  insulted.  Seeing  that  the 
multiplication  of  words  would  be  folly,  I  quietly 
withdrew.  Meeting  the  principal  the  next  morning, 

he  said  an  apology  was  due  Dr.  C ,  and  that*  I 

must  make  it  immediately. 

Determined  to  live  a  Bible  Christian  as  far  as 
light  was  given,  I  remembered,  "If  therefore  thou 
bringest  thy  gift  to  the  altar,  and  there  rememberest 
that  thy  brother  hath  aught  against  thee,  leave  there 
thy  gift  before  the  altar,  and  go  thy  way,  first  be  re- 
conciled to  thy  brother  and  then  come  and  offer  thy 
gift."  (Math.  5  -.23-24.  R.  V.)  At  the  first  oppor- 
tunity I  told  him  that  I  was  sorry  if  I  had  wronged 
him  in  any  way. 

I  had  heard  nothing  preached  but  the  suppres- 
sion of  the  old  Adam  nature  and  supposed  that  all 
I  could  do  was  to  pray  for  more  grace. 

Reconciliation  with  the  pastor  was  not  brought 
about- until  a  difficulty  was  settled  between  his  son 
and  his  teacher,  in  which  the  son,  on  refusal  to  com- 
ply with  certain  requests,  said  sarcastically,  "I  am 
not  from  Indiana,  anyhow,"  which  was  the  native 
state  of  his  preceptor.  No  sooner  had  the  words  es- 
caped his  lips  than  the  gangling  "Hoosier"  hurled 
1iim  through  a  glass  door  into  my  room,  knocking  me 
to  the  floor  amid  flying  glass.  Such  treatment,  being 


64  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

neither  Christian  nor  humane,  I  so  expressed  myself 
in  the  hearing  of  the  young  man's  father,  who  man- 
ifested his  surprise  at  my  being  in  sympathy  with 
his  son,  After  this  his  attitude  toward  me  was  en- 
tirely changed ;  but  my  difficulties  were  not  ended, 
for  the  principal,  who  seemed  to  have  imbibed  all  the 
animosity  of  the  pastor,  and  to  have  already  a  good 
supply  of  ill  will  of  his  own  on  hand,  made  it  exceed- 
ingly interesting  for  me  the  rest  of  the  term,  all  of 
which  worked  out  for  my  good  in  the  end. 

While  passing  through  these  experiences  I  was 
painfully  conscious  that  my  Christian  life  was  not 
complete,  and  it  is  partly  for  this  reason  that  I  have 
related  them  so  much  in  detail. 

Outside  the  school  room  Mormon  practices  and 
heresies  abounded  on  all  sides.  The  spiritual  dark- 
ness was  intense.  A  missionary  in  Utah  needs  to 
be  firmly  established  in  Christ  and  keep  the  heart 
warmed  by  continual  prayer,  to  successfully  with- 
stand the  cold  and  deadening  influences  that  are 
abroad. 

One  afternoon  a  note  was  put  under  the  door 
of  Davis  Hall  requesting  some  of  us  to  call  at  a 
certain  street  number.  Supposing  some  one  was  in 
destitute  circumstances,  Sister  Iliff  and  myself  took  i 
car  to  the  city  limits,  where  we  found  the  number  on 
a  board  at  the  door  of  a  dug-out.  Entering,  we 
found  an  old  lady  carrying  a  broken  arm  in  a  sling. 
There  were  three  little  grandchildren  and  a  grown- 
up feeble  minded  son,  scarcely  able  to  take  care  of 
himself,  all  sitting  by  a  board  eating  some  fat  pork? 
without  any  bread,  and  drinking  a  little  tea.  The 


MISSIONARY    IN    UTAH.  65 

two  daughters,  mothers  of  these  children,  had  died 
of  broken  hearts  from  neglect  and  ill  treatment. 
The  fathers  spent  most  of  their  time  in  the  saloons, 
refusing  to  support  their  offspring.  The  old  lady's 
arm  had  not  been  properly  set  and  caused  intense 
suffering.  She  told  us  that  these  children  had  been 
left  entirely  in  her  care,  and  now  being  disabled  she 
had  no  means  of  support;  that  she  was  one  of  the 
hand-cart  emigrants  in  1856  to  Utah,  and  becoming 
dissatisfied  with  the  Mormon  faith,  had  apostatized, 
which  caused  the  church  to  refuse  to  help  her  in  this 
time  of  distress. 

Aside  from  what  we  saw  on  the  table,  they  had 
had  nothing  to  eat  for  two  days.  The  half  demented 
son  had  assisted  some  one  in  butchering  a  pig  and 
secured  some  of  the  meat.  The  next  day  food  and 
fuel  were  sent  them.  In  the  meantime  I  went  with 
Sister  Iliff  as  she  confronted  saloon  keepers  with  the 
story  of  these  children,  whose  homes  they  were  im- 
poverishing and  whose  fathers  they  were  ruining. 
To  her  plea  that  it  was  their  duty  to  help  them,  they 
heartily  and  liberally  responded.  They  apparently 
did  not  enjoy  our  presence  or  the  depicting  of  this 
scene,  and  were  anxious  to  get  rid  of  both.  Yet  such 
are  the  scenes  that  are  making  up  the  dark  annals  of 
the  saloon  that  will  burn  in  the  soul  of  the  rum-seller 
where  the  worm  of  memory  dieth  not  and  the  fire  is 
not  quenched.  "Woe  unto  him  that  giveth  his  neigh- 
bor drink."  (Hab.  2:15.) 

Such  is  a  picture  of  poverty  in  Utah,  which  oc- 
casionally the  home  missionary  is  called  to  look 
upon.  Many  pitiful  sights  are  seen  of  indigent  and 


66  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


infirm  persons  that  somehow  make  their  way  to  this 
Mormon  Zion,  looking  for  prosperity  and  expect- 
ing a  miraculous  healing  of  their  diseases.  Sights  of 
wretchedness  and  suffering  always  deeply  affected 
me,  and  I  had  to  guard  against  their  repetition  lest 
my  nerves  should  become  unstrung  and  I  should  be 
unfitted  for  work. 


CHAPTER  VI. 

LIMA,     MONTANA LAST    YEAR    AS    A    TEACHER — A 

SCHOOL,  ELECTION — TRIALS  AND  TRIUMPHS. 

In  June  I  returned  to  Montana.  My  sister 
who  had  been  with  me  in  Utah  preceded  me  a  few 
weeks  and  was  teaching  the  summer  school  on  a 
ranch  seven  miles  from  Red  Rock.  Wishing  to 
spend  some  time  with  her,  I  stopped  off  at  this  sta- 
tion from  a  morning  train  but  had  no  way  to  get  out 
there.  The  night  operator  kindly  offered  to  take 
me  out  if  a  conveyance  could  be  had.  There  was  but 
one  horse  and  buggy  available.  The  horse  was  a 
bronco,  and  while  the  owner  would  not  recommend 
him,  he  said  we  might  take  our  chances.  The  oper- 
ator was  a  large  man,  weighing  perhaps  two  hun- 
dred and  fifty  pounds.  Believing  that  he  ought  to 
be  able  to  manage  the  horse,  and  that  I  might  con- 
sider myself  safe,  the  bronco  was  hitched  up  and  we 
were  off.  In  our  conversation  on  the  road,  the  sub- 
ject of  religion  was  introduced.  I  found  that  my 
escort  claimed  to  be  an  infidel.  I  gladly  witnessed 
for  Christ  while  he  set  forth  his  tenets  of  unbelief.  I 
told  him  that  if  he  were  facing  death  he  would  not 
talk  so.  He  said  that  he  had  been  at  death's  door 
and  had  felt  no  fear.  With  these  words  upon  his 
Hps,  something  about  the  harness  gave  way,  the 
horse  with  a  leap  left  the  road,  taking  us  over  sage 

67 


68  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

brush  and  greasewood  in  the  direction  of  an  irrigat- 
ing ditch.  Seeing  our  danger  I  kept  looking  to  God 
in  silent  prayer,  when  he  cried,  "For  God's  sake, 
jump!"  All  fear  had  left  me  and  I  refused  to  make 
a  move.  He  tumbled  out  of  the  back  part  of  the 
buggy  just  as  we  were  approaching  the  ditch,  when 
suddenly  the  horse  stopped.  He  rose  to  his  feet  with 
a  blanched  face  and  tremblingly  said,  "Why,  you  are 
not  even  pale!"  I  reminded  him  of  how  he  had 
boasted  a  few  moments  before,  and  now  when  the 
testing  time  came  he  proved  himself  to  be  a  coward. 
He  made  no  reply  and  changed  the  subject. 

Three  years  before,  in  a  similar  experience,  I 
had  proved  that  God  could  keep  one  in  perfect  peace 
whose  mind  was  stayed  on  Him.  (Isa.  26:3.)  It 
was  in  a  thunder  storm  on  top  of  the  Rocky  Mount- 
ains. An  aunt,  an  old  bachelor  friend  and  myself 
were  crossing  the  range  from  Bannock  to  Dillon, 
when  we  encountered  the  storm.  A  number  of 
horses  had  been  killed  by  lightning  in  the  vicinity  a 
few  days  before.  My  aunt  and  friend  were  badly 
frightened.  Our  horses  were  becoming  unmanage- 
able as  we  began  to  descend  a  dangerous  part  of  the 
road,  winding  around  the  mountain  side. ,  I  thought 
of  the  many  times  our  driver  had  good  naturedly 
ridiculed  religion,  and  how  he  had  been  encouraged 
by  my  aunt's  manifest  amusement  at  his  wit.  Now, 
perhaps,  this  was  God's  opportunity  to  teach  them 
a  lesson.  I  could  not  keep  from  laughing,  which 
may  have  appeared  irreverent  or  in  derision  of  their 
fear.  Anyhow,  it  was  incomprehensible  to  them,  and 
called  forth  a  severe  upbraiding,  especially  from  my 


YEAR  AS  A  TEACHER.  69 

aunt.  I  knew  I  was  God's  child,  and  the  display  of 
His  migjity'power  was~entertainment  for  me  on  a 
majestic  scale.  I  was  as  confident  and  careless  as  a 
playful  child7  tossed  and  caught  in  the  arms  of  a 
loving  father.  I  knew  that  He  would  not  let  me  fall. 
It  was  not  presumption  nor  hysteria,  but  the  woflz, 
derful  working  of  God's  Spirit  within  me,  that  filled 
my  mouth  with  laughter  for  which  I  was  not  re- 
sponsible. Glory  to  Jesus!  It  is  our  privilege  to 
have  a  triumphant  faith.  He  had  promised  never  to 
leave  nor  forsake  me,  and  now  that  He  spoke  to  us 
through  the  lightning's  flash  and  thunder's  roar,  His 
majestic  presence  sweetly  filled  my  soul. 

"I've  seen  the  lightning's  flashing, 

I've  heard  the  thunders  roll; 
I've  felt  sin's  breakers  dashing, 

Trying  to  conquer  my  soul. 

"I've  heard  the  voice  of  Jesus 

Telling  me  still  to  press  on; 
He  promised  never  to  leave  me 

Never  to  leave  me  alone." 

Hallelujah !  We  can  have  a  faith  like  God's  old 
heroes,  as  we  see  it  set  forth  in  that  wonderful 
eleventh  chapter  of  Hebrews. 

"O  for  a  faith  that  will  not  shrink, 

Though  pressed  by  every  foe; 
That  will  not  tremble  on  the  brink 

Of  any  earthly  woe!" 

"A  faith  that  shines  more  bright  and  clear 

When  tempests  rage  without; 
That  when  in  danger  knows  no  fear, 

In  darkness  feels  no  doubt." 


/O  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

Soon  after  my  arrival,  my  sister  asked  me  what 
I  would  do,  as  the  school  boards  had  all  employed 
their  teachers  for  the  fall  and  winter.  I  was  face  to 
face  with  the  same  difficulty  I  had  experienced  the 
year  before,  but  I  believed  the  Lord  would  open  the 
way  as  He  had  formerly  done. 

There  was  a  school  district  about  twenty-five 
miles  away,  said  to  be  one  of  the  best  in  the  country. 
The  chairman  of  the  board  had  told  my  sister  a  few 
days  before  that  they  had  already  engaged  their 
teacher.  Much  of  my  time  was  being  spent  in 
prayer,  when  one  afternoon  I  was  led  to  go  down  and 
see  for  myself.  My  sister,  and  others,  thought  it 
very  foolish  to  make  this  trip,  after  the  chairman  of 
the  board  had  told  her  that  the  teacher  had  already 
been  engaged.  However,  I  succeeded  in  getting  a 
ranchman  to  hitch  up  to  his  big  wagon  and  take  us 
down.  We  found  two  members  of  the  board  at 
home,  while  the  one  who  had  given  my  sister  the  in- 
formation was  out  of  town.  After  telling  them  that 
I  had  come  to  make  application  for  the  school,  they 
stepped  to-  one  side  to  talk  it  over.  On  returning 
they  asked  me  to  call  again  wlien  the  chairman  of  the 
board  could  be  present.  I  begged  them  to  decide,  if 
possible,  for  it  was  too  long  a  trip  to  make  a  second 
time.  They  again"  retired,  this  time  staying  longer 
In  their  absence  the  Holy  Spirit  gave  me  the  evi- 
dence that  I  was  to  have  the  school.  I  felt  as  com- 
posed as  if  they  had  already  given  their  answer. 
Returning,  they  said,  "We  have  decided  that  Mr. 

R has  controlled  the  school  board  long  enough, 

and  we  propose  to  engage  you  whether  he  likes  it  or 


LAST  YEAR  AS  A  TEACHER.  7 1 

not.  We  understand  that  he  has  promised  the 
school,  but  we  had  no  voice  in  it."  They  agreed  to 
give  me  seventy  dollars  for  the  first  month  and  then 
raise  my  wages. 

My  sister  and  I  spent  part  of  our  vacation  at  my 
uncle's  home  in  Dillon.  A  few  weeks  before  the 
opening  of  my  school  I  took  the  mountain  fever. 
The  strain  of  the  work  at  Salt  Lake  had  told  on  my 
physical  system  so  that  I  fell  an  easy  prey  to  this  dis- 
ease. To  get  away  from  the  noise  and  for  other  rea- 
sons I  had  to  occupy  a  room  near  the  roof.  I  was  not 
confined  to  my  bed  all  the  time,  but  when  up  and 
around  I  suffered  much  more  than  any  one  knew. 
It  was  averse  to  my  nature  to  be  dependent  on  others 
even  in  sickness.  The  Saturday  before  my  school 
was 'to  commence  I  was,  to  all  appearances,  utterly 
unfit  for  work.  My  uncle  asked  me  what  I  was  in- 
tending to  do.  I  told  him  I  expected  to  open  the 
school  at  the  appointed  time.  He  smiled  and  said, 
"Yes,  you  will."  He  was  reluctant  to  believe  that  I 
meant  it  when  I  asked  for  an  expressman  to  take  my 
trunk  to  the  depot.  No  sooner  was  an  effort  made 
to  get  to  the  train  than  I  felt  God  helping  me,  and 
two  hours  later,  weak  and  trembling,  but  with  a  keen 
appetite,  I  arrived  at  my  destination.  One  of  the 
members  of  the  board  met  me,  and  said  that  after 
repeated  efforts  he  had  failed  to  find  a  boarding 
house  for  me,  unless  I  would  go  to  the  railroad  hotel 
where  a  saloon  was  kept.  He  said  that  the  wife  of  a 
railroad  conductor,  living  near  by,  could  take  me  if 
she  would,  but  that  she  had  refused  four  different 
times  that  day.  He  pointed  out  the  house  to  me  and 


72  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEl'LAH. 

said,  "You  can  go  and  see  her,  if  you  think  best."  I 
asked  the  Lord  to  touch  her  heart  and  save  me  from 
having  to  go  to  the  hotel.  My  knock  at  the  door  was 
answered  by  the  lady  herself,  who  smilingly  said, 
"You  are  the  school  teacher ;  come  in.  They  won't 
take  no  for  an  answer,  and  I  suppose  I  will  have  to 
take  you."  She  took  my  wraps,  said  that  supper  was 
just  ready  and  invited  me  into  the  dining  room.  She 
was  a  splendid  cook  and  made  me  feel  quite  at  home. 
During  the  next  three  weeks  I  improved  rapidly 
in  health,  gained  several  pounds  in  weight  and  did 
not  lose  an  hour  from  school.  Jesus  was  very 
precious  to  me. 

"The  opening  heavens  around  me  shone 

With  beams  of  sacred  bliss, 
When  Jesus  showed  His  mercy  mine 

And  whispered  I  was  His." 

In  this  town  of  Lima,  with  a  school  enrollment 
of  seventy  scholars,  there  was  no  Sabbath  School  or 
church  services,  and  not  a  sign  of  spiritual  life  any- 
where. The  burden  for  the  children  came  upon  me 
and  with  the  assistance  of  one  or  two  others  a  Sab- 
bath school  was  started.  It  took  much  wisdom  to 
deal  with  the  Catholic  and  Mormon  element,  so  that 
the  work  might  not  be  hindered.  I  taught  the  child- 
ren of  the  day  school  at  least  forty  hymns,  also  the 
Lord's  prayer  and  many  texts  of  Scripture,  some  of 
which  they  would  repeat  at  the  opening  exercises  in 
the  morning. 

Two  little  entertainments  were  given  in  which 
we  raised  ninety  dollars  and  bought  an  organ  for 


LAST  YEAR  AS  A  TEACHER.  73 

the  school.  The  children  were  learning  to  sing  and 
many  of  the  parents  were  delighted ;  otherwise  they 
undoubtedly  would  have  opposed  me  in  the  religious 
training  their  children  were  receiving.  A  lesson  in 
hygiene,  with  Yaggy's  anatomical  chart,  the  last 
half  of  the  year,  took  up  an  hour  at  the  close  of  each 
day  with  the  entire  school  as  a  class.  This  gave  a 
wide  scope  to  talk  on  temperance  and  religious  sub- 
jects. 

My  greatest  delight  was  in  this  work,  and  I 
would  have  been  glad  of  the  privilege  of  turning  the 
school  into  a  mission  room. 

Impressions  made  on  the  minds  of  children  are 
usually  lasting  and  I  believed  that  the  seed  sown 
would  bring  forth  fruit. 

The  chairman  of  the  board,  who  had  been 
ignored  when  I  was  employed,  "was  nursing  his 
wrath  to  keep  it  warm,"  and  waiting  for  an  oppor- 
tunity to  retaliate.  The  school  election  was  soon  to 
take  place  and  this  man  worked  secretly  for  weeks 
to  elect  a  candidate,  who,  with  himself,  could  put  me 
out.  He  was  an  ex-saloon  keeper  and  his  candidate 
was  a  great  muscular  freight  conductor,  the  John 
Sullivan  of  the  road,  with  the  record  of  killing  a 
man.  The  conductor,  at  whose  house  I  boarded, 
came  home  one  night  with  a  black  eye  and  otherwise 
bruised  up,  having  suffered  at  his  hands.  His 
daughter  attended  my  school.  When  once  it  was 
necessary  to  punish  her,  the  neighbors  warned  me 
that  the  tiger  in  her  home  would  spring  upon  me. 

The  next  morning  after  the  occurrence,  I  looked 
out  and  saw  the  mother  coming.  She  had  a  fight 


74  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  B£UI<AH. 

with  a  woman  shortly  before,  and  when  she  heard 
her  little  girl  had  been  punished  she  said  she  would 
go  to  the  school  house  and  whip  the  teacher.  Know- 
ing her  purpose,  I  met  her  at  the  door  with  a  smile 
and  invited  her  in.  She  looked  confused,  and  said 
she  had  come  to  see  about  her  daughter.  I  told  her 
Clara  was  a  very  good  girl,  but  sometimes,  like 
other  children,  she  needed  to  be  corrected.  She 
looked  at  me  for  a  moment,  then  turning  to  her 
daughter  said,  "Clara,  if  you  give  this  teacher  any 
more  trouble  I  \vill  whip  you  myself,"  then  she 
quietly  walked  away. 

The  town  was  wonderfully  stirred  up  over  the 
school  election.  The  opposition  had  enlisted  the 
worst  element  of  the  place  and  it  was  evident  they 
would  win  if  God  did  not  interpose.  The  religious 
instruction  in  the  school  was  being  made  an  issue 
by  them.  I  knew  the  Lord  was  able  to  deliver  me  as 
He  did  Daniel  from  the  plot  of  wicked  men.  I  went 
to  my  room  to  spend  the  night  in  prayer.  At  3 
o'clock  in  the  morning  the  victory  was  won. 

"Hushed  was  every  doubt, 
Gone  was  every  fear." 

This  was  only  two  days  before  the  election. 
The  following  day  men  could  be  seen  standing  in 
small  groups  talking  and  hurrying  to  and  fro  from 
one  saloon  to  another.  It  was  evident  that  the  ex- 
citment  was  increasing.  Some  of  this  I  observed 
with  occasional  glances  from  my  school  house  win- 
dow. Men  had  stopped  their  work  to  electioneer. 
Friendships  were  being  renewed  and  glasses  of 


LAST  YEAR  AS  A  TEACHER.  75 

liquor  flowed  freely.  The  most  popular  saloon  in 
town  was  run  by  Peter  Halligan,  an  Irishman,  who 
was  uncle  to  some  little  Catholic  girls  in  the  school. 
He  declared  that  while  he  himself  was  a  great  sinner 
he  believed  that  the  school  teacher  had  been  a  bless- 
ing to  the  town.  He  said  that  he  had  three  little 
nieces  that  he  wanted  to  see  brought  up  right  and 
this  teacher  had  a  great  influence  over  them  for  good. 
Further,  that  he  intended  to  place  himself  on  record 
in  this  campaign  as  being  a  friend  of  humanity  and 
work  and  vote  in  behalf  of  the  teacher.  (The  even- 
ing before  the  election,  the  chairman's  brother,  who 
had  espoused  our  cause,  came  in  with  a  beaming  face 
and  said  he  was  sure  the  opposition  had  overlooked 
the  fact  that  women  could  vote.  He  advised  that 
two  ladies,  who  were  present,  should  go  quietly 
among  our  lady  friends  and  have  them  assemble  in 
one  place  just  in  time  to  go  in  a  body  to  the  polls 
and  vote  before  the  hour  of  closing.  At  the  set  time 
seventeen  women  had  gathered.  I  was  impressed 
that  two  more  votes  would  be  necessary,  and  at  that 
moment  thought  of  two  women  who  lived  back  of 
the  school  house  among  the  willows.  They  came 
quickly  when  sent  for.  The  company  of  women, 
headed  by  the  originator  of  the  plan,  with  a  twinkle 
in  his  eyes,  went  to  the  polls  and  voted.  The  chair- 
man was  confounded  and  said  to  his  brother  with 
indignation  and  stinging  sarcasm,  "When  did  you 
become  a  Mormon."  It  was  too  late  to  muster  their 
women ;  the.  time  had  come  for  the  closing  of  the 
polls,  A  little  later  the  news  was  heralded  over  the 
town  that  we  had  won  by  two  majority. 


76  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

I  was  employed  for  the  spring  term  and  offered 
the  school  for  the  following  year,  with  an  advance 
of  wages.  As  I  had  other  plans  before  me,  I  de- 
clined, naming  my  youngest  sister  Kate  for  the  place, 
whom  they  employed  to  teach  the  school. 


CHAPTER  VII. 

IN   DENVER — MARRIAGE — STRUGGLE  AGAINST 
WORIvDUNESS. 

After  spending  the  summer  of  1887  teaching  a 
country  school,  I  left  for  Denver,  Colo.,  where  I 
expected  to  take  music  and  a  few  other  studies  in 
the  Methodist  University.  I  found  after  trial  that 
I  was  unable,  physically,  to  do  what  I  had  planned 
and  dropped  all  but  music.  I  had  taught  thirteen 
months  in  a  high  altitude  with  only  one  week's  in- 
termission and  did  not  realize  my  unfitness  for  heavy 
work. 

Mr.  White,  to  whom  I  was  soon  to  be  married, 
insisted  on  my  taking  a  course  in  the  S.  S.  College 
of  Elocution.  He  said  it  would  be  two  hours  a  day 
of  recreation  and  would  be  helpful  to  my  broken 
down  nerves.  Before  I  was  hardly  aware  he  had 
arranged  for  my  tuition  and  I  was  in  a  large  class 
of  Methodist  students  and  ministers  and  among  them 
others  who  were  preparing  for  the  stage.  I  was 
glad  to  see  so  many  church  folks  there,  but  when  I 
learned  that  the  principal,  Mrs.  ,  was  a  Uni- 
tarian and  a  Christian  Scientist  I  was  very  much  sur- 
prised and  felt  entirely  out  of  place.  Some  of  the 
ministers  were  bringing  their  carefully  prepared  ser- 
mons to  her  to  be  drilled  on  oratorical  delivery.  She 
took  the  liberty  to  criticise  the  thought,  striking  at 


78  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

the  very  foundation  of  Christianity,  sneering  at  the 
blood  of  the  atonement  and  remarking  that  she  had 
no  use  for  a  slaughter  house  religion.  She  sought 
continually  to  bias  the  students  against  orthodox 
teaching,  claiming  it  was  a  day  of  advance  thought, 
culture  and  refinement  of  which  the  Unitarians  were 
in  the  lead.  Mr.  White  often  rebuked  her  and  tried  to 
offset  her  arguments  by  a  plain  statement  of  facts, 
but  this  only  led  to  endless  discussion  and  took  much 
time  in  the  class.  Providentially  I  was  kept  from 
taking  any  part  in  these  discussions.  It  was  sad  to 
see  her  influence  over  the  young  and  unstable. 

Mr.  White  invited  Joe  Stocks,  a  bright  young 
man,  in  the  last  year  of  the  University  course  to 
take  some  studies  in  this  school  of  elocution.  Little 
did  he  know  that  this  step  meant  the  ruin  of  this, 
his  old  friend  and  schoolmate,  who  was  unconverted, 
the  subject  of  many  prayers,  and  was  the  son  of  a 
deceased  M.  E.  minister.  A  trap  was  laid  for  his 
feet  by  an  assistant  teacher,  ten  years  his  senior,  who 
with  the  help  of  the  principal  succeeded  in  winning 
his  affections,  resulting  in  their  marriage  and  his  go- 
ing into  the  Unitarian  ministry.  The  hand  of  God 
was  upon  him  and  he  only  lived  a  short  time.  Thus 
was  a  young  life  that  gave  promise  of  great  useful- 
ness blasted. 

On  the  2  ist  of  December,  1887,  Mr.  White  and 
I  were  united  in  marriage  in  the  Asbury  M.  E. 
church.  We  continued  to  pursue  our  studies  in  the 
University  and  at  the  school  of  elocution.  We  were 
spending  much  of  our  time  in  Shakespeare  when 
Booth,  the  great  tragedian,  was  announced  for  Den- 


MARRIAGE.  79 

ver.  The  principal  said  that  the  students  in  the 
school  of  elocution  must  all  attend.  I  had  never  been 
to  a  theater,  but  the  enemy  came  to  Mr.  White  as 
an  angel  of  light  and  made  him  believe  it  would  be 
no  harm  to  go  once  for  educational  benefits. 
He  bought  a  couple  of  tickets  against  my 
protest  and  begged  me  to  use  them,  to  which 
I  finally  consented.  After  being  seated  in 
the  great  auditorium  of  the  Tabor  Grand  I 
felt  like  I  was  in  the  ante-chamber  of  the 
pandemonium,  my  suffering  was  so  great.  I  believe 
the  very  atmosphere  was  thronged  with  demons. 
When  once  more  in  the  open  air  I  severely  censured 
myself  for  being  influenced  to  go.  While  I  had  a 
fearful  conflict  with  the  powers  of  darkness,  my 
Savior  did  not  leave  me,  knowing  that  in  my  heart  I 
desired  to  please  Him  more  than  any  one  else.  It 
taught  me  the  lesson  of  walking  with  Jesus  alone  re- 
gardless of  the  advice  of  others.  I  made  up  my 
mind  that  I  did  not  want  a  diploma  from  such  an 
institution  and  stopped  before  the  end  of  the  year 
against  the  wishes  of  those  who  claimed  to  be  inter- 
ested in  my  welfare. 

I  was  a  member  of  the  Trinity  M.  E.  church 
and  at  this  time  was  singing  in  the  choir  of  some- 
thing less  than  a  hundred  singers.  Their  new  church 
was  being  built  and  the  services  were  then  held  in 
the  opera  house*  It  looked  like  this  opera  house 
would  swallow  me  up.  I  became  alarmed  at  the 
dearth  in  my  own  soul — I  was  obtaining  no  spirit- 
ual food  in  any  of  the  services. 

There  were  musicals,  concerts,  church  entertain- 


8O  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

ments,  recitals,  University  receptions  and  oratorical 
contests,  all  highly  endorsed  by  the  University  and 
the  Methodist  churches  in  the  city.  In  spite  of  the 
spirit  of  pride  and  worldliness,  I  saw  in  them,  I  tried 
to  think  well  of  them.  There  were  lectures  innumer- 
able, some  of  them  by  the  bishops.  Before  I  was 
aware  my  soul  was  famishing  for  the  bread  of  life. 
I  had  been  sustained  with  the  heavenly  manna  and 
drank  of  the  waters  from  the  smitten  rocks  in  the 
barren  wastes  of  Montana,  but  now  in  Denver 
among  thousands  of  Methodists  with  their  great 
university  and  magnificent  church  buildings  my  soul 
was  in  danger. 

I  loved  my  husband's  company,  but  he  had  so 
many  companions  and  associates  that  it  was  a  rare 
opportunity  to  spend  an  hour  with  him  alone.  He 
had  made  a  reputation  in  the  book  business,  canvass- 
ing in  the  summer  months  to  secure  the  means  to 
pursue  his  studies  in  the  school.  Many  young  men 
whose  means  were  limited  came  to  him  for  assistance 
and  he  often  spent  hours  in  drilling  them  for  the 
field.  If  we  walked  down  the  street  together  there 
was  some  one  to  engage  him  in  conversation  or  to 
ask  a  favor  of  him.  In  addition  to  his  college  studies 
he  had  his  book  business,  conference  course  and 
students'  appointments. 

Dr.  Godbey's  little  book  called  "Victory'*  was 
providentially  sent  to  me  from  home.  It  threw  me 
into  a  greater  state  of  unrest  in  regard  to  my  own 
experience.  I  saw  in  it  something  beyond  the  light 
that  I  had  been  walking  in.  I  had  heard  some  talk 
on  the  subject  of  holiness  and  a  number  of  persons 


MARRIAGE.  8 1 

with  whom  I  was  acquainted  professed  it,  but  I  be- 
lieved my  experience  would  compare  with  theirs  and 
here  again  the  enemy  had  a  snare  for  my  feet,  for- 
getting that  Paul  said,  "They  measuring  themselves 
by  themselves  and  comparing  themselves  among 
themselves  are  not  wise."  (2  Cor.  1012.)  Had  I 
known  it  meant  the  crucifixion  of  the  "old  man"  or 
the  destruction  of  the  carnal  nature,  I  might  have 
soon  been  delivered  from  my  bondage.  Instead  of 
this  I  had  my  eyes  upon  a  great  blessing. 

Rev.  A.  C.  Peck  preached  one  morning  on  the 
subject  at  the  church  campmeeting  at  Palmer  Lake. 
He  invited  the  people  forward  to  the  altar  to  seek 
"the  blessing."  A  number  responded.  He  con- 
fessed he  did  not  have  it  himself  and  went  forward 
with  the  rest  as  a  seeker.  There  was  no  change  man- 
ifested or  testified  to  when  they  returned  to  their 
seats.  Two  persons,  however  ,on  the  ground  I  be- 
lieved had  something  the  rest  did  not  enjoy.  I  did 
not  understand  them  and  hushed  the  voice  that  was 
speaking  to  me  by  saying  that  perhaps  it  was  only  a 
difference  of  disposition. 

I  had  seen  a  deeper  spiritual  light  in  my  hus- 
band's face  in  the  earlier  years  of  our  acquaintance, 
and  now  wondered  at  its  absence.  I  expected  great 
help  from  him,  but  instead  of  talking  salvation, 
books  and  studies  were  his  theme. 

A  few  weeks  after  my  arrival  in  Denver  he 
asked  me  to  go  with  him  to  spend  the  evening  with 
the  pastor  and  his  wife  at  Asbury  Church  in  North 
Denver.  I  had  been  so  long  isolated  from  the  fel- 
lowship of  Christian  people  that  I  was  expecting  a 


82  BOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

spiritual  treat,  but  to  my  disappointment  the  time 
was  spent  in  discussing  Greek,  French,  Hebrew,  etc. 
Having  never  studied  these  languages,  I  felt  very 
much  out  of  place  and  wished  I  had  not  gone. 

Mr.  White's  health  was  not  good  when  he  en- 
tered the  fall  term  of  the  university.  He  had  worked 
himself  down  trying  to  do  too  many  things  at  one 
time.  I  did  all  I  could  to  induce  him  to  give  up  his 
studies  and  asked  the  presiding  elder  to  so  advise 
him.  He  said :  "He  had  better  stay  in  school.  A 
young  man  who  has  not  finished  his  education  don't 
stand  much  show  these  days."  Thinking  of  what 
my  life  would  be  without  him,  and  the  heartless- 
ness  of  the  remark,  I  could  scarcely  conceal  my  in- 
dignation ;  however,  prayer  was  answered  and  his 
studies  were  dropped.  I  wondered  how  many  young 
men  were  being  sacrificed  on  the  altars  of  the  uni- 
versities. 

We  were  needing  fifty  dollars,  and  knew  not 
from  what  source  it  was  to  come,  when  my  hus- 
band was  called  to  his  charge  at  Hugo  to  hold  a 
funeral  service.  A  young  man  of  the  town  had  been 
on  a  drunken  spree,  and  becoming  delirious,  had  wan- 
dered away  in  the  cold  and  darkness  with  only  his 
night  clothes  on  and  perished  on  the  plains.  His 
body,  not  found  for  a  week,  showed  how  he  had 
staggered  and  fallen  on  beds  of  cactus  before  he 
became  completely  exhausted.  This  young  man  had 
been  brought  up  in  a  good  family,  was  kind  hearted 
and  well  liked.  The  people  were  badly  broken  up 
over  this  occurrence,  especially  the  saloon  keepers 
and  rough  element  of  the  town,  who  turned  out  en 


MARRIAGE.  83 

masse  to  the  funeral.  Mr.  White  was  ignorant  as 
to  who  was  dead  until  he  reached  the  town.  In  the 
opening  prayer,  power  and  grace  were  given,  and 
unprepared  as  he  was,  he  found  the  divine  promise 
true  and  a  mouth  and  wisdom  not  his  own  were 
given  him.  The  people  were  deeply  moved.  Tears 
trickled  down  the  cheeks  of  the  hard-hearted  men 
as  he  drew  a  picture  of  the  deceased  in  his  childhood 
innocency,  with  a  mother's  love  and  hope  for  her 
baby  boy,  and  set  over  against  it  his  death  alone  on 
the  plains.  Heart-breaking  contrast !  He  spoke  on 
temperance  and  the  righteousness  of  God's  laws  in 
human  life,  and  concluded  with  an  exhortation  to 
them  to  turn  from  their  sins  and  seek  the  Lord.  That 
evening  one  of  the  leading  hard  characters  of  the 
place  came  to  him  and  said,  "I  am  a  bad  man !  You 
touched  us — you  got  a  hold  of  us !"  and  he  stopped 
and  wept.  "I've  got  a  little  present  for  you  from 
the  saloon  people  and  Catholics  of  the  town;  no 
Christians  had  anything  to  do  with  it,"  and  he 
handed  him  $55.50,  saying:  "You  will  never  lack 
for  a  congregation  in  Hugo."  This  was  given  in 
answer  to  prayer.  Our  extremity  was  God's  oppor- 
tunity. 


CHAPTER  VIII. 
LAMAR — PASTOR'S  WIFE — FURNACE  OF  AFFLICTION. 

On  the  1 5th  of  March,  1889,  a  beautiful  baby 
boy  was  born  in  our  home.  No  one  but  God  knows 
the  dreadful  ordeal  through  which  I  passed,  or  the 
years  of  suffering  that  awaited  me  from  that  hour. 
Had  I  known  it  death  would  have  been  preferable. 
In  reading  God's  word  I  found  He  had  chosen  me 
in  the  furnace  of  affliction.  Skillful  physicians  in 
their  treatment  were  to  prove  of  little  avail.  The 
babe  was  six  months  old  when  my  husband  was  ap- 
pointed pastor  at  Lamar,  Colo.  He,  not  wishing  to 
take  me  where  I  could  not  have  the  best  medical  as- 
sistance, left  me  at  Colorado  Springs  to  be  treated  by 
a  specialist,  while  he  went  to  his  charge.  Arrange- 
ments had  been  made  for  me  to  stay  several  months. 
After  a  few  weeks,  realizing  but  little  benefit  from 
the  treatment,  I  gave  it  up  and  went  to  him  at  Lamar. 
He  was  disappointed  and  regretted  that  I  had  come, 
not  knowing  what  could  be  done  for  me  there.  I 
read  a  number  of  medical  works  searching  in  vain 
for  help.  My  nerves  were  so  shattered  that  I  could 
not  confine  myself  to  anything  long  at  a  time.  The 
labors  and  hardships  of  life,  together  with  my  late 
sickness,  had  broken  me  down.  I  had  only  been 
there  a  few  days  when  I  was  taken  very  sick.  Of  the 
two  physicians  in  the  place,  one  was  a  moral  man, 

84 


PASTOR'S  WIFE.  85 

but  limited  in  knowledge  and  practice ;  the  other  a 
dissipated  unbeliever,  who  had  come  there  in  hopes 
of  reform.  While  only  twenty-eight  years  old,  he 
showed  his  ability  as  a  physician  and  surgeon  and 
was  making  a  specialty  of  the  diseases  for  which  I 
was  being  treated.  While  there  was  a  principle  in- 
volved in  employing  either  of  these  men,  we  decided 
to  give  the  latter  a  trial.  For  two  years,  without 
charge,  he  did  everything  possible  to  better  my  con- 
dition, and  yet  there  was  only  a  slight  improvement. 
I  loved  music  and  painting,  which  he  advised  me  to 
study  as  a  helpful  diversion  to  mind  and  nerves. 

The  salaries  of  pastors  who  preceded  us  were 
largely  raised  by  church  suppers,  held,  we  were  told, 
about  every  two  weeks,  which  seemed  incredible. 
The  church  people  said  we  would  have  to  pursue  the 
same  course.  When  told  that  the  pastor  would  not 
receive  money  raised  in  this  way,  some  were  in- 
dignant, and  others  said  we  were  making  a  mistake, 
and  still  others  that  we  would  come  to  it.  We  took 
it  to  the  Lord  in  prayer,  who  confirmed  us  in  our 
course,  and  assured  us  that  our  needs  would  be  sup- 
plied. 

Nearly  three  months  passed  in  which  we  re- 
ceived seven  dollars  on  salary,  yet  we  did  not  suffer, 
as  the  Lord  provided  for  us  in  other  ways. 

One  day  when  the  indifference  of  the  church 
was  a  greater  trial  than  usual,  an  unsaved  man  who 
occasionally  attended  church  came  to  our  door.  He 
had  been  out  and  secured  twelve  twenty-five  dollar 
subscriptions  followed  by  a  list  of  smaller  ones.  He 
said,  "I  am  not  a  Christian ;  I  was  once,  though,  and 


86        LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

I  know  what  true  Christianity  is."  I  see  that  these 
church  suppers  have  been  a  curse  to  the  town.  I 
have  been  watching  you  very  closely  and  I  appreciate 
the  stand  you  have  taken.  No  other  minister  that  we 
have  had  here  has  been  brave  enough  to  do  it.  This 
paper  you  may  turn  over  to  your  stewards."  With- 
out any  effort  on  the  part  of  the  pastor  the  money 
was  brought  and  laid  down  in  the  parsonage  during 
the  rest  of  our  stay  in  the  town. 

There  being  no  suppers  now  to  occupy  the  time 
and  minds  of  the  people,  they  began  to  think  on  their 
pitiful  spiritual  condition  and  to  hope  and  pray  for 
a  revival.  But  a  deeply  rooted  trouble  was  in  the 
way.  The  suppers  and  fairs  had  caused  a  division 
among  the  women  of  the  church  and  some  were  not 
on  speaking  terms.  One  was  accused  of  stealing 
cake  and  money.  In  strife  for  the  honor,  two  women 
appeared  in  a  social  dressed  as  Martha  Washington 
when  only  one  was  expected.  Husbands  and  others 
had  taken  sides  and  the  outcome  was  a  scandal  of 
two.  After  much  prayer  it  was  planned  to  gather  all 
the  parties  involved  in  a  meeting  at  the  church.  It 
was  difficult  to  get  some  of  the  most  obstinate  ones 
to  come,  but  they  finally  yielded  and  were  in  their 
place  at  the  appointed  hour.  The  pastor  prepared  a 
discourse  on  the  tongue,  which  was  delivered  in  the 
Spirit.  Before  he  had  finished  the  sisters  were  weep- 
ing. After  praying  himself  he  called  on  me.  Some 
one  sobbed  aloud  and  a  general  melting  time  fol- 
lowed. Concessions  were  made  and  barriers  re- 
moved. A  revival  soon  broke  out,  in  which  forty 
were  added  to  the  church. 


PASTOR'S  WIFE.  87 

It  was  Li  this  meeting,  that  although  weak  in 
body,  the  Spirit  began  to  move  on  me  to  exhort. 
We  had  tried  hard  to  get  an  evangelist  to  help  us  but 
failed.  One  evening  at  the  close  of  the  sermon,  when 
there  had  not  been  as  much  liberty  as  usual,  thought 
after  thought  kept  flashing  through  my  mind,  and  I 
had  a  conviction  that  I  ought  to  get  up  and  invite 
people  to  come  to  the  altar.  Hesitating  as  if  between 
two  mighty  influences  the  moment  passed  and  the 
opportunity  wras  gone.  That  night  sleep  went  from 
me  and  most  of  the  night  was  spent  in  prayer  and 
weeping.  The  enemy  tried  to  console  me,  by  tell- 
ing me  that  women  had  no  recognition  as  preachers 
or  exhorters  in  the  M.  E.  Church,  and  that  an  effort 
of  the  kind  would  be  entirely  out  of  place.  I  awak- 
ened my  husband  and  asked  him  what  he  thought 
about  it.  His  answer  was,  "If  you  want  to  talk  I'll 
open  the  way  for  you  any  time."  A  few  evenings 
later  the  opportunity  was  again  presented.  This 
time  I  wras  more  strongly  moved  than  before,  and 
just  as  I  wras  about  to  rise  to  my  feet  the  enemy  whis- 
pered, "You  will  make  a  great  blunder."  Again  the 
opportunity  passed  and  my  condemnation  was 
greater  than  before.  The  revival  closed  and  the  class 
meeting  was  the  only  place  where  I  could  unburden 
my  heart.  One  Sunday  morning  I  made  a  desperate 
effort  to  break  through  the  powers  that  held  me,  but 
utterly  failed  and  quickly  left  the  church.  My  health 
had  been  gradually  improving,  but  now  the  old 
symptoms  of  disease  began  to  take  a  stronger  hold. 

One  day  after  a  restless  night  I  became  im- 
pressed that  I  would  not  live  longer  than  a  year.  I 


88  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

wanted  to  go  home  to  Kentucky  once  more.  The 
doctor  said  a  change  would  do  me  good  and  advised 
that  I  make  preparations  to  stay  for  some  length 
of  time.  With  our  thirteen-months-old  babe,  I 
started  on  my  journey.  He  was  very  restless  and 
soon  exhausted  my  strength.  At  St.  Louis  I  had  a 
nervous  collapse  on  the  train.  My  strength  wa& 
somewhat  regained  before  I  reached  Cincinnati, 
where  I  changed  cars  without  much  difficulty.  After 
a  day's  delay  at  Paris  I  reached  my  parents'  home 
at  Millersburg,  Ky.  The  child  was  exposed  to  both 
whooping  cough  and  measles  on  the  road,  and  nine 
days  after  our  arrival  was  taken  down  with  both 
diseases.  His  life  was  almost  despaired  of  several 
times,  and  being  at  his  bedside  night  and  day  I  had 
no  chance  to  gain  strength  myself. 

My  brother  Charles  had  been  attending  the  Ken- 
tucky Wesleyan  College  and  was  ready  for  the  senior 
class.  The  school  was  to  be  moved  from  Millersburg 
to  Winchester,  where  he  could  not  very  well  attend. 
I  insisted  on  his  finishing  his  course  at  the  Univers- 
ity of  Denver,  but  he  apparently  had  no  thought  of 
doing  so.  I  believed  that  God  had  a  purpose  in  my 
going  home,  and  as  my  health  had  not  improved, 
asked  Him  what  this  visit  was  for,  when  it  flashed 
upon  me  that  Charles  must  go  to  Colorado. 

Six  weeks  passed  when  the  doctor  said  the  baby 
would  be  able  to  make  the  trip  back.  When  near 
Kansas  City  he  took  a  relapse  and  some  persons  in 
the  car,  seeing  his  condition,  asked  how  far  it  was 
to  the  end  of  my  journey.  After  telling  them  I  heard 
an  old  lady  say  in  an  undertone  that  the  child  would 


PASTOR'S  WIFE.  89 

not  live  to  reach  home.  A  German  noticed  the 
startling  effect  of  the  remark  and  did  all  he  could  to 
console  me.  He  took  it  upon  himself  to  help  pre- 
pare some  food  for  the  baby ;  his  help  and  sympathy 
greatly  lightened  my  burden.  When  he  reached  his 
destination  it  was  like  parting  with  an  old  friend. 
His  last  words  were,  "The  child  will  soon  be  all 
right ;  you  need  not  fear."  It  was  another  manifes- 
tation of  God's  goodness  in  providing  a  friend  in 
time  of  need. 

After  reaching  home  my  brother's  face  was  con- 
tinually before  me.  He  had  studied  hard  and  needed 
a  change  of  climate  and  associations.  .  Mother  wrote 
me  later  that  the  way  was  closed  for  him  to  finish 
his  course  there,  and  that  he  was  ready  to  come  to 
Colorado.  My  husband  had  aided  young  men  and 
women  in  securing  positions  in  Denver,  where  they 
could  earn  a  part  of  their  expenses  while  attending 
the  University.  I  tried  to  induce  him  to  take  some 
interest  in  my  brother,  but  being  absorbed  in  his 
work,  he  appeared  indifferent.  I  knew  with  a  little 
effort  he  could  open  the  way.  God  was  permitting 
this  test  as  a  trial  of  my  faith. 

s  One  day  some  friends  from  a  former  pastorate 
called  to  see  us.  With  limited  means,  the  burden  of 
their  heart  was  to  get 'their  son  in  the  University. 
My  husband  had  secured  a  place  for  their  daughter 
in  a  good  Methodist  family  a  few  years  before  and 
now  assured  them  that  he  would  be  pleased  to  do  as 
much  for  their  son.  I  listened  to  their  conversation 
until  I  could  bear  it  no  longer  and  slipped  out  into 
the  church  study,  where  my  soul  was  poured  out  in 


i,0  IvOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

tears  to  God.  My  husband  soon  followed  me  and 
wanted  to  know  the  cause  of  my  sorrow.  When 
told,  he  became  thoroughly  aroused  and  three  weeks 
later  my  brother  arrived  in  Lamar.  His  membership 
was  transferred  to  the  church  at  this  place,  where  he 
was  licensed  as  a  local  preacher.  Mr.  White  accom- 
panied him  to  Denver  and  after  a  few  days  of  fruit- 
less effort  they  betook  themselves  to  special  prayer, 
and  just  such  a  place  opened  as  was  desired.  In  my 
husband's  absence  the  baby  became  seriously  ill  and 
I  had  no  one  with  me  but  a  little  girl.  The  germs  of 
typhoid  fever  were  preying  on  my  system,  and  while 
not  able  to  be  up  myself  I  had  most  of  the  care  of 
the  child. 

The  premonition  of  death  that  I  had  had  some 
time  before  I  believed  was  from  God.  My  nervous 
system  was  broken  down,  my  bodily  powers  were 
depleted,  and  I  was  an  easy  prey  to  the  disease  that 
now  took  a  strong  hold  upon  me.  It  looked  like  the 
end.  My  husband  returned  and  for  days  watched 
constantly  at  my  bedside,  when  it  became  necessary 
to  have  other  help.  The  past  thirteen  years  of  my 
life  were  reviewed  under  the  searchlight  of  the 
Spirit.  There  had  been  many  victories  over  which 
I  rejoiced ;  on  the  other  hand,  failures  which  caused 
me  much  humiliation  and  sorrow,  especially  those  in 
the  revival  meetings  the  previous  winter.  The  con- 
flict at  times  during  these  years  had  been  fearful  and 
there  were  places  where  I  became  faint  hearted 
and  shrank  from  the  foe.  Often  great  clouds  hung 
over  my  spiritual  horizon  and  the  cross  was  carried 
when  I  almost  fainted  beneath  it,  but  never  since 


PASTOR'S  WIFE.  91 

the  memorable  night  when  I  took  it  up  had  I  dared 
to  lay  it  down.  Knowing  that  Jesus  said,  "Whoso- 
ever doth  not  bear  his  cross,  and  come  after  me,  can 
not  be  my  disciple."  (Luke  14:27.)  Many  times 
I  was  helped  on  the  way  by  the  old  hymn : 

"Must  Jesus  bear  the  cross  alone 

And  all  the  world  go  free? 
No,  there's  a  cross  for  every  one, 

And  there's  a  cross  for  me." 

"The  consecrated  cross  I'll  bear, 

Till  death  shall  set  me  free; 
And  then  go  home,  my  crown  to  wear, 

For  there's  a  crown  for  me." 

My  body  was  racked  with  pain,  and  the  end 
seemed  very  near,  but  more  and  more  came  a  con- 
scious unfitness  for  it.  There  were  hard  chills,  fol- 
lowed by  hours  of  burning  fever.  In  the  short  in- 
tervals of  sleep,  I  would  dream  that  I  was  a  child 
again  climbing  up  to  break  the  icicles  from  the  eaves 
of  the  house  to  quench  my  thirst.  Just  as  they  were 
within  my  grasp  my  foot  would  slip  and  they  were 
never  reached.  A  literal  fire  seemed  to  be  consuming 
me  and  I  was  well  aware  that  there  was  no  hope  out- 
side of  the  divine  intervention.  My  mind  was  clear 
through  it  all,  upon  which  the  attendants  remarked. 
For  this  I  thanked  God,  as  I  wanted  to  know  things 
as  they  were,,  and  especially  God's  dealings 
with  me. 

We  had  a  skillful  nurse  and  a  physician,  who 
were  doing  all  in  their  power  to  relieve  my  suffering. 
No  one  could  have  been  more  faithful  than  the  nurse. 


92  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

She  had  come  contrary  to  her  own  plans  and  wishes 
to  wait  upon  me,  knowing,  as  I  knew  also,  that  God 
had  sent  her  at  this  critical  hour. 

The  baby  would  often  stand  by  my  bedside  and 
watch  me.  He  would  take  my  hand  and  place  it  to 
his  cheek,  then  draw  my  arm  around  his  neck.  The 
thought  of  leaving  him  motherless  was  more  than  I 
could  bear.  I  had  heard  of  mothers  who  became  per- 
fectly resigned  in  leaving  their  children  before  their 
death,  but  I  was  not.  One  of  my  aunts  and  my 
oldest  sister  were  among  the  number  ,and  their  last 
moments  were  those  of  greatest  triumph.  Some  of 
the  old  saints  called  it  dying  grace  and  it  was  evi- 
dent that  I  did  not  have  it.  I  was  disappointed,  and 
could  not  help  but  say  so.  There  were  thorns  in  my 
pillow.  I  had  sung  many  times : 

"Jesus  can  make  a  dying  bed 

Feel  soft  as  downy  pillows  are, 
While  on  His  breast  I  lean  my  head 
And  breathe  my  life  out  sweetly  there." 

Instead  of  my  head  being  on  His  breast,  as  the 
end  was  approaching.  He  seemed  to  be  far  away. 
I  could  not  say, 

"My  soul  would  stretch  her  wings  in  haste, 
Fly  fearless  through  death's  iron  gate." 

Yet  I  did  not  think  I  would  be  lost,  but  I  wanted 
greater  victory.  Job  said,  "I  will  speak  in  the  bit- 
terness of  my  soul.  I  will  say  unto  God,  'Do  not 
condemn  me;  show  me  wherefore  thou  contendest 
with  me.  Is  it  good  unto  thee  that  thou  shouldst 


PASTOR'S  WIFE.  93 

despise  the  work  of  thine  hands?  Thou  knowest 
that  I  am  not  wicked ;  and  that  there  is  none  that  can 
deliver  out  of  thine  hand.  If  I  be  wicked,  woe  unto 
me;  and  if  I  be  righteous,  yet  will  I  not  lift  up  my 
head.  I  am  full  of  confusion;  therefore  see  thou 
mine  affliction.' '  (Job  10  ch.)  Like  Job,  I  was 
disposed  to  reason  with  God  and  bring  my  complaint 
before  Him,  taking  Him  back  over  the  thirteen  years 
of  my  Christian  experience,  deploring  my  failures 
and  recounting  my  victories,  but  if  I  tried  to  justify 
myself,  my  own  mouth  would  condemn  me.  Yet 
\\ithal  there  was  a  consciousness  that  I  had  made  an 
heroic  effort  to  please  Him  in  all  things,  however 
much  I  might  have  come  short.  My  fever  had 
reached  one  hundred  and  six  degrees,  but  now  fell 
below  normal  in  fifteen  minutes.  I  said :  "This  is 
death."  Thinking  of  the  child  and  making  one  more 
desperate  appeal  to  be  spared  for  his  sake,  a  gentle 
chiding  voice  said,  "Is  that  not  a  selfish  prayer?"  I 
could  see  now  and  said,  "Yes,  Lord."  He  was  bend- 
ing over  me.  A  greater  work  than  simply  living 
for  the  child  was  flashing  in  upon  my  soul.  I  had 
thought  nothing  in  this  hour  of  the  thonsands  of 
motherless  children  in  the  world,  and  multitudes  of 
men  and  women  who  were  in  the  tombs  of  spiritual 
death.  Could  it  be  possible  that  I  had  been  so  self- 
ish ?  Another  instant  and  my  heart  was  singing : 

"Yes,  I'll  tell  the  wondrous  story 

Of  the  Christ,  who  died  for  me; 
How  He  left  His  throne  in  glory 

For  the  cross  on  Calvary." 


94         LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

"He  will  keep  me  till  the  river 

Rolls  its  waters  at  my  feet; 
Then  He'll  bear  me  safely  over 

Where  the  loved  ones  I  shall  meet." 

The  assurance  came  that  my  life  would  be 
spared,  and  that  not  only  to  sing  but  preach.  After 
this  I  sank  lower,  and  remember  that  they  were  try- 
ing to  take  my  temperature.  On  returning  to  con- 
';'-.  sciousness  my  desire  was  to  tell  the  nurse  that  she 
need  not  be  anxious  about  me,  for  the  Lord  had 
spared  my  life  to  preach  the  gospel.  She  was  a  little 
deaf  and  I  had  not  strength  enough  to  make  her  hear 
me,  and  did  not  tell  her  until  the  next  day,  when,  at- 
tempting to  do  so,  I  found  that  she,  too,  was  aware 
that  the  change  had  come  through  divine  interven- 
tion. 

I  was  no  sooner  able  to  be  up  than  my  husband 
took  sick.  He  did  not  want  to  give  up,  and  was  un- 
willing to  have  a  physician  called,  and  until  confined 
to  his  bed  he  sat  near  the  fire  for  a  number  of  days, 
suffering  intensely.  With  difficulty  he  was  prevailed 
upon  to  take  some  medicine.  Before  it  had  time  to 
take  effect,  he  happened  to  think  that  the  teacher  of 
the  infant  class  in  the  Sunday  School  was  going  to 
leave  town  and  it  would  be  necessary  to  procure  an- 
other to  fill  the  place.  The  person  whom  he  thought 
would  take  the  place  lived  on  the  outskirts  of  the 
town.  A  cold  November  wind  was  blowing,  and  as 
he  had  no  one  at  hand  to  send,  he  insisted  on  going 
himself.  Unable  to  persuade  him  not  to  run  such  a 
risk,  as  he  walked  away  from  the  house  a  gloom  set- 
tled down  upon  me.  I  believed  it  meant  his  death  or 


PASTORS  WIFS.  95 

the  next  thing  to  it.  A  few  hours  after  his  return 
he  took  a  serious  relapse,  and  at  the  same  time  the 
baby  was  suddenly  taken  ill — threatened  with  mem- 
braneous croup.  We  could  get  no  help  only  as  the 
neighbors  would  come  in  and  offer  their  assistance. 
An  elderly  woman  sat  up  with  the  child  one  night 
when  his  case  was  most  critical.  Observing  the 
nervous  and  physical  strain  upon  me,  she  said,  "If 
you  will  rest  and  sleep  awhile  I  will  watch  the  baby 
every  moment."  With  reluctance  I  took  her  at  her 
word  and  dropped  to  sleep,  when  I  was  suddenly 
awakened  as  if  some  one  had  touched  me.  She  was 
sitting  in  a  chair  with  her  head  thrown  back,  fast 
asleep,  and  the  child  struggling  for  breath.  This  so 
frightened  me  that  I  was  unwilling  to  trust  him  with 
any  one  after  that.  While  he  was  slowly  recovering 
my  husband  was  confined  to  his  bed  and  growing 
worse.  His  suffering  was  so  great  that  he  required 
almost  every  minute  of  my  time.  I  had  instantly  re- 
sponded to  every  call,  until  one  night  he  dropped 
into  a  doze  and  I  took  this  opportunity  to  rest  a 
little.  The  bed  was  no  sooner  touched  than  I  heard 
his  voice  calling  as  if  from  a  great  distance.  After 
I  had  made  several  efforts  to  move,  and  failed,  the 
Holy  Spirit  whispered,  "Have  you  reached  your  ex- 
tremity and  are  you  willing  to  trust  him  to  me  now  ?'' 
An  hour  passed  and  I  was  still  unable  to  move.  Dur- 
ing the  time  I  seemed  to  be  on  the  bosom  of  a  great 
ocean  in  the  arms  of  the  Infinite  one.  Again  I  heard 
my  husband's  voice,  I  awakened  and  found  him 
propped  up  on  his  elbow  looking  me  in  the  face. 
There  was  a  decided  change  for  the  better,  and  for 


96  BOOKING  BACK  FROM  BELJLAH. 

the  first  time  since  his  illness  he  was  without  pain. 
As  soon  as  he  was  able  to  be  up  some  of  the  Sunday 
School  teachers  came  in  and  began  to  talk  about  hav- 
ing a  Christmas  tree.  He  thought  it  would  be  just 
the  thing  to  create  new  interest  and  insisted  on  their 
having  it,  and  doing  their  best  to  make  it  a  success. 
A  committee  was  appointed,  and  a  Mrs.  C en- 
gaged to  take  charge  of  the  programme.  She  was 
a  woman  of  culture,  a  fine  musician,  but  a  sceptic. 
She  proposed  a  cantata  which  would  require  much 
preparation,  on  condition  that  I  would  take  the  lead- 
ing part,  that  of  a  grandmother  entertaining  her 
grandchildren  on  Christmas  eve,  and  appear  in  old 
lady's  costume  with  knitting  in  hand  in  company 
with  grandfather,  the  Sunday  School  superintend- 
ent. Further,  the  grandmother  was  to  sing  a  solo 
in  a  cracked  voice  to  make  merriment  for  the  child- 
ren. With  conscience  smiting  me  during  the  re- 
hearsals, I  begged  to  be  excused,  but  was  persist- 
ently refused.  My  husband  pleaded  with  me  to 
take  part  just  to  please  him.  It  was  hard  to 
refuse  him  when  he  was  sick.  Weakening  several 
times  I  went  to  the  woman  in  charge  and  told  her 
she  must  put  some  one  else  in  my  place.  She  said 
she  would  draw  out  and  have  nothing  more  to  do 
with  the  cantata  if  I  refused  to  go  through  with  it. 
The  tree  was  loaded  down  with  presents  for 
the  children.  Fearing  that  some  one  would  be 
missed,  my  husband  asked  me  to  stay  in  the  church 
.•md  see  that  none  were  overlooked.  The  excitement 
from  first  to  last  was  too  much  for  him,  and  his  fever 
rose  higher  than  it  had  been  for  many  days.  My 


PASTOR'S  WIFE.  97 

greatest  desire  was  to  remain  at  his  side,  but  he  re- 
peatedly requested  me  to  return  to  the  church,  where 
he  thought  my  presence  was  needed.  Several  times 
during  the  afternoon,  when  he  supposed  I  was  at  the 
church,  I  was  standing  on  the  steps  listening  to  his 
breathing  through  the  slightly  open  door. 

Skillful  hands  had  arranged  the  drapery  and 
decorated  the  platform,  until  the  chupch  looked  more 
like  a  theater  than  a  house  of  pcayer.  The  Sunday 
school  superintendent,  who  appeared  as  grandfather 
in  the  first  part  of  the  exercises,  retired  to  reappear 
as  Santa  Claus.  Some  children  had  been  overlooked 
after  all,  and  the  parents  manifested  their  displeasure 
by  taking  them  out  of  our  school.  Leaving  the 
church  that  night,  I  resolved  never  to  have  anything 
more  to  do  with  a  Christmas  tree  entertainment,  and 
later  on  so  expressed  myself. 

After  my  husband's  recovery,  revival  services 
were  begun  with  the  help  of  Rev.  E.  F.  Bittner. 
Some  souls  were  brought  to  Christ.  The  afternoon 
meetings  were  helpful  to  Christians,  and  some  were 
seeking  a  better  experience,  although  there  was  ao 
definite  preaching  on  the  second  work  of  grace. 
Feeling  a  great  lack  in  my  soul,  I  set  myself  to  fast- 
ing and  prayer.  I  had  never  fasted  before  and  found 
it  hard  to  do.  I  was  a  slave  to  coffee,  and  naturally 
a  headache  followed.  At  1 1  o'clock  I  was  really  suf- 
fering ;  this  troubled  me,  for  the  assisting  pastor  had 
fasted  all  day  without  any  inconvenience.  Before 
noon  I  resorted  to  coffee  for  relief.  As  the  Holy 
Spirit  searched  my  heart,  I  realized  that  something 
was  seriously  wrong,  yet  as  I  wept  and  prayed  I  ob- 


98  LOOKING  BACK  PROM 

tained  no  relief.  The  evangelist  attributed  my  diffi- 
culty to  hysteria.  While  I  knew  this  was  not  true, 
yet  it  gave  me  a  backset  spiritually  that  I  did  not  re- 
cover from  for  over  a  year. 


CHAPTER  IX. 

A  MOUNTAIN  CHARGE) — HEART  CRY  FOR  PURITY. 

At  the  close  of  the  second  year  at  Lamar  the 
official  board  again  asked  for  our  return.  We  knew 
a  change  had  to  be  made,  and  when  the  presiding 
elder  heard  the  story  of  the  past  months  of  suffering, 
his  heart  was  touched  and  he  assured  me  he  would 
do  all  he  could  to  make  a  chang*e  where  I  could  have 
the  advantages  of  mountain  air  and  pure  water, 
which  the  physician  said  was  an  absolute  necessity. 
We  packed  our  goods  before  leaving  for  the  Confer- 
ence at  Denver  in  June,  1891.  My  husband  had  fin- 
ished his  ministerial  course  and  was  ordained  elder 
at  this  session.  After  two  or  three  days,  our  pre~ 
siding  elder  said  he  had  no  desirable  place  for  us, 
and  it  looked  like  we  would  have  to  return  to  Lamar. 

We  went  to  our  room  to  pray,  and  while  on  our 
knees  the  question  came  clearly :  "If  it  is  God's  will 
for  you  to  go  back,  will  you  go  even  though  it  costs 
your  lives?"  Our  hearts  immediately  responded, 
"Yes,"  which  was  no  sooner  said  than  all  anxious 
concern  was  gone,  and  we  had  the  victory  of  a  sweet 
resignation  to  His  will.  Later  we  met  the  elder,  who 
greeted  us  with  a  smile  and  said,  "I  have  just  the 
place  for  you,  where  there  is  nothing  to  hinder  Sister 
White  from  getting  well."  It  was  a  little  town  at 
the  foot  of  the  hills,  known  for  its  beautiful  scenery. 

99 


IOO  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

pure  air  and  mountain  water,  and  was  just  such  a 
place  as  the  physician  had  recommended.  In  having 
been  willing  to  return  to  our  former  charge,  God  had 
not  required  it  of  us. 

In  a  few  days  we  were  in  a  private  boarding 
house  in  the  town,  looking  for  a  suitable  place  to  live. 
The  best  we  could  find  was  a  little  five-room  cottage, 
which  was  neither  ceiled  nor  plastered,  much  to  the 
mortification  of  my  pride,  but  boarded  inside  and  out 
and  whitewashed. 

The  Ladies'  Aid  society  was  making  prepara- 
tions for  an  elaborate  fair  and  festival,  and  were 
busy  making  cotton  dogs,  monkeys,  rabbits  and  var- 
ious fancy  articles.  They  boasted  of  the  new  church 
organ  which  they  purchased  with  money  raised  in 
this  way. 

Before  we  came  to  the  charge  the  president  of 
the  society  had  turned  a  church  social  into  a  dance. 
She  was  not  a  member  of  the  church  and  attended 
balls,  card  parties,  etc.  When  we  met  her  she 
greeted  us  with  words  of  flattery  and  a  deceitful 
smile.  It  was  plain  to  be  seen  that  unstable  souls 
would  be  easily  influenced  by  her.  They  had  al- 
lowed her  to  handle  all  the  money,  and  some  said 
there  was  much  more  paid  in  than  she  had  turned 
over.  As  we  were  opposed  to  church  fairs,  socials  or 
suppers  of  any  kind  we  took  measures  against  them. 
She  then  gathered  a  company  at  the  house  of  a 
friend,  including  a  number  of  school  children,  whom 
she  thought  would  vote  with  others  for  the  festivals. 
I  was  advised  not  to  attend  this  meeting,  on  account 
of  my  nervousness,  but  as  the  time  approached  I  felt 


A  MOUNTAIN  CHARGE.  IOI 

I  must  go,  and  did.  She  called  the  meeting  to  order 
and  in  her  smooth  way  set  forth  the  advantages  of 
church  socials,  to  which  there  were  many  assenting 
voices.  Unable  to  remain  quiet  longer  I  said,  "I 
have  understood  that  this  woman  has  run  the  society 
into  a  dance  and  to  the  devil,  and  it  looks  very  much 
like  it  is  true."  Her  friends  were  about  to  devour 
me,  when  silence  was  regained.  She  remarked  that 
our  support  would  be  a  "slim  affair"  after  that,  add- 
ing that  she  did  not  believe  we  would  receive  five 
dollars  between  that  and  spring. 

Some  good  folks  were  afraid  I  had  made  a  mis- 
take, even  though  they  admitted  the  truth  had  been 
spoken.  I  was  severely  tested,  and  thought  perhaps 
I  had  not  used  wisdom  in  saying  what  I  did,  when 
it  came  to  me  to  ask  a  certain  sister  to  go  home  with 
us  and  pray.  I  dreaded  to  have  the  presiding  elder 
hear  of  it,  although  I  believed  him  to  be  the  most 
spiritual  elder  we  had  ever  had|  As  we  knelt  in 
prayer  only  a  few  sentences  were  uttered  when  the 
glory  of  God  began  to  fill  my  soul.  I  arose,  saying 
that  whomsoever  else  I  had  displeased,  I  was  sure  I 
had  pleased  God. 

They  succeeded  in  getting  the  consent  of  the 
trustees  and  held  a  festival  in  the  church.  It  was  a 
time  of  frolic,  of  eating  and  drinking,  of  buying  and 
selling — a  veritable  Vanity  Fair.  It  would  have  dis- 
graced a  common  hall,  let  alone  a  church,  and  was 
all  done  under  the  name  of  Christianity.  The  plan 
was  to  apply  the  money  on  the  pastor's  salary,  but  as 
he  would  not  accept  it,  they  saved  it  for  his  suc- 
cessor. This  ended  the  church  festivals  while  we  re- 


IO2  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

mained  on  the  charge.  Instead  of  our  support  being 
cut  off,  money  came  from  the  most  unexpected 
sources  to  supply  our  every  need.  The  leading  busi- 
i  ness  man  of  the  town,  although  he  made  no  pretense 
to  Christianity,  showed  his  approval  of  the  action 
•Kli/by  placing  a  twenty  dollar  gold  piece  in  the  pastor's 
hand  and  telling  him  that  as  long  as  he  had  a  store 
we  need  not  want  for  anything.  This  man  gave 
freely  to  our  support.  We  did  not  suffer  in  conse- 
quence of  the  stand  taken.  The  Lord  was  our  shep- 
herd. 

The  gambling  devil  was  in  possession  of  one  of 
the  trustees  and  helped  him  to  carry  a  fair  outward 
appearance  in  business  life  and  to  manifest  a  real 
devotion  to  his  wife,  and  her  two  boys  by  a  former 
husband.  But  the  empty  shell  of  his  life  collapsed, 
and  in  it  came  the  loss  of  one  of  the  best  properties  in 
the  place — the  house  of  his  wife.  In  the  sudden 
downfall,  he  left  her  mangled  beneath  the  ruins, 
without  saying  good-bye,  and  deftly  covered  his 
footprints  behind  him. 

As  the  holiday  season  was  approaching,  the  peo- 
ple began  to  talk  about  a  Christmas  tree  enter- 
tainment, which  they  hoped  the  pastor  would  not 
oppose.  He  had  no  definite  convictions  against 
Christmas  trees  and  consented  to  their  having  one. 

I  knew  it  was  wrong  from  the  experience  of 
the  previous  winter,  and  believed  it  would  not  be  a 
success.  The  night  of  the  23rd  there  was  a  great 
snow  storm,  which  lasted  all  the  next  day;  only  a 
few  persons  were  seen  on  the  streets  and  some  of 
them  were  on  horseback.  It  was  plain  to  me  that 


A  MOUNTAIN  CHARGE.  IO3 

light  was  being  given  us  to  walk  in  and  that  the  en- 
tertainment was  providentially  a  failure,  though 
others  were  loath  to  believe  it. 

My  husband  greatly  deplored  my  use  of  coffee, 
as  the  physician  said  it  was  doing  me  much  harm. 
He  proposed  to  get  me  a  piano  if  I  would  give  it  up. 
My  desire  for  the  instrument  was  so  great,  that  after 
some  hesitation  I  told  him  I  would.  A  few  weeks 
later  a  beautiful  Weber  piano  was  brought  to  our 
home — paid  for,  and  all  my  own.  One  can  imagine 
how  my  heart  swelled  with  delight  as  I  ran  my 
ringers  over  the  keys  of  the  coveted  treasure. 

Dinner  was  called.  A  shadow  was  thrown  over 
me  when  asked,  "How  about  the  coffee  ?"  One  time 
I  had  done  without  coffee  for  six  long  months  in  an 
effort  to  quit  it,  and  the  struggle  ended  in  defeat.  I 
wanted  to  keep  my  word  and  fully  intended  to  when 
the  promise  was  made,  but  my  courage  failed  me, 
and  bursting  into  tears,  I  said,  "I  can't  do  it !"  I  can 
never  forget  the  painful  look  on  my  husband's  face. 
I  told  him  that  I  could  give  the  instrument  up,  but 
could  not  go  through  what  I  had  in  the  past.  He 
saw  my  weakness  and  submitted. 

I  had  promised  the  Lord  to  sing  for  Him  and 
many  hours  a  day  were  spent  in  practice.  I  knew 
there  were  persons  who  did  not  preach,  but  who  sim- 
ply sang  the  gospel,  and  was  in  hopes  that  the  Lord 
would  let  me  off  as  easily.  I  had  a  strong  voice,  that 
compassed  over  three  octaves,  and  specialists  in  voice 
culture  had  given  me  much  encouragement,  all  of 
which  tended  to  avert  my  attention  from  the  real 
work  that  God  had  for  me  to  do. 


IO4  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

On  the  24th  of  August,  1892,  another  baby  boy 
was  born  in  our  home.  Being  now  the  mother  of 
two  children,  and  having  a  broken  down  constitu- 
tion, I  could  see  no  way  to  fulfill  my  promise  to  God. 

The  tempter  tried  to  make  me  believe  that  all 
thought  that  I  had  ever  had  of  preaching  the  gospel 
was  a  delusion,  yet  in  my  dreams  I  stood  before  large 
congregations  that  were  being  held  by  some  super- 
natural power  while  burning  messages  went  forth 
from  my  lips.  On  awakening  I  would  say,  "O,  if 
this  could  only  be  a  reality,  and  the  messages  would 
come  as  they  did  in  my  dreams,  how  wonderful  it 
would  be!"  I  knew  not  then  that  the  Holy  Spirit 
was  trying  to  bring  me  into  an  experience  that  would 
enable  me  to  speak  with  a  tongue  of  fire. 

There  was  no  talking  or  preaching  on  holiness, 
and  I  was  ignorant  as  to  my  true  standing  in  spiritual 
things.  When  the  presiding  elder  came  I  listened  to 
every  word  in  hopes  that  something  might  be  said 
that  would  give  me  light.  As  my  heart  was  searched 
from  day  to  day,  I  was  conscious  that  I  needed  an- 
other work  of  grace,  whether  it  was  God's  plan  that 
I  should  attain  to  it  in  this  life  or  not,  but  was  more 
and  more  impressed  with  the  fact  that  it  was  His  will 
to  sanctify  me  at  once.  A  shudder  came  over  me  as  I 
thought  of  going  to  the  judgment  and  finding  out 
when  it  was  too  late  that  something  had  been  left  out 
of  my  Christian  experience. 

John  said,  "I  indeed  baptize  you  with  water 
unto  repentance:  but  He  that  cometh  after  me  is 
mightier  than  I,  whose  shoes  I  am  not  worthy  to 
bear:  He  shall  baptize  you  with  the  Holy  Ghost, 


CO 

if 
P" 

1= 

Kk 


CRY  FOR  PURITY.  IO5 

and  fire."  (Math.  3:11.)  Was  it  not  this  baptism 
that  I  needed  ?  The  Spirit  was  presenting  something 
to  my  heart  that  was  necessary  to  complete  my  salva- 
tion, and  this  some  of  the  old-time  saints  called 
dying  grace.  I  believed  that  a  common  sense  view 
of  it  was  to  have  living  grace,  and  in  this  I  often 
came  short.  I  thought  the  blessing  of  sanctification 
could  not  be  lost,  therefore  did  not  understand  my 
husband.  Comparing  my  experience  with  his,  con- 
trary to  scripture  (2  Cor.  10-12),  I  concluded  that 
if  he  was  sanctified  so  was  I.  He  talked  and  wrote 
to  me  on  the  subject,  and  once  knelt  and  prayed  that 
I  might  receive  the  blessing,  but  after  we  were  mar- 
ried he  ceased  to  talk  or  pray  about  it  except  in  a 
general  way,  as  ministers  without  the  experience 
often  do,  thinking  they  are  possessing  and  preaching 
holiness.  I  went  to  hear  two  evangelists  in  Denver, 
who  were  reported  as  having  great  success,  in  hopes 
that  I  might  find  out  their  secret.  They  preached 
nothing  but  what  I  had  heard  for  years  and  I  left 
their  meetings  disappointed.  I  heard  Mother  Van 
Cott  preach,  but  received  no  help  from  her.  I  knew 
that  Moody  was  an  uneducated  man.  I  read  his 
books,  searching  for  light,  but  failed  to  find  anything 
beyond  my  own  experience,  yet  I  believed  there  was 
a  secret  to  his  success  in  his  early  life. 

My  soul  panted  for  the  living  waters  only  to  be 
tormented  by  broken  cisterns. 

I  longed  for  inward  strife  to  cease, 
And  prayed  to  have  His  perfect  peace. 

One  day,  after  my  husband's  return  from  Den- 
ver, he  said  that  we  were  both  living  beneath  our 


IO6       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

x 

privilege  and  that  he  intended  to  renew  his  cov- 
enant with  God.  There  was  nothing  encouraging 
about  this  remark  to  me,  for  I  had  renewed  mine 
hundreds  of  times  only  to  be  met  with  the  same 
difficulties  and  be  overcome  by  them.  Birthdays 
and  holidays  were  special  days  of  covenant-making. 
It  was  my  custom  to  watch  the  old  year  out  on  my 
knees.  Many  tears  were  shed  on  account  of  broken 
promises.  I  would  determine  to  give  more  time  to 
the  study  of  God's  word,  to  be  more  faithful  and 
earnest  in  prayer,  and  to  be  long-suffering  and  kind. 

The  enemy  tried  to  make  me  believe  that  my  im- 
patience and  irritability  were  due  to  shattered  nerves, 
and  I  often  excused  myself  in  this  way.  The  phy- 
sician had  advised  a  change  of  climate,  the  study  of 
music,  painting,  etc.,  but  all  had  failed  to  bring 
about  the  desired  results. 

My  husband  had  met  Dr.  F.  E.  Yoakum,  a 
sanctified  physician,  in  Denver,  and  decided  to  put 
my  case  in  his  hands.  He  believed  in  divine  healing 
and  often  prayed  for  his  patients  and  they  were 
healed.  He  also  led  many  of  them  into  the  experi- 
ence of  sanctification,  using  every  opportunity  to  en- 
lighten them  on  the  subject. 

Again  the  holiday  season  rolled  around  and  pre- 
parations were  being  made  for  another  Christmas 
entertainment.  Notwithstanding  my  past  experi- 
ences they  prevailed  on  me  to  take  part  again. 

A  physician  of  the  town  was  asked  to  take  part, 
regardless  of  his  character  and  of  the  fact  that  his 
drink  and  profligacy  had  broken  up  his  family.  In 
a  duet  I  was  to  sing  the  soprano  and  he  the  bass. 


CRY  FOR  PURITY.  IO/ 

Decorations  were  being  completed  at  the  church 
when  a  message  came  for  the  pastor  to  call  and  see 
a  woman  who  was  dying.  He  went,  and  on  return- 
ing rehearsed  the  sad  story  of  a  mother's  awful  suf- 
fering and  death,  surrounded  by  her  husband  and 
children  with  no  one  else  present  but  himself.  She 
had  been  sick  for  several  days,  but  the  church,  so 
occupied  with  festive  preparations,  had  left  her  un- 
visited,  uncared  for  and  unprayed  with,  except  in 
her  last  moments.  "Inasmuch  as  ye  did  it  not  to  one 
of  the  least  of  these  ye  did  it  not  to  me."  (Mat. 

25:45-) 

The  last  rehearsal  was  in  progress  at  the  time, 
but  the  physician  failed  to  appear,  which  gave  the 
committee  some  concern.  Hearing  of  the  woman's 
death,  I  had  fears  for  our  baby,  lately  taken  with  a 
heavy  cold,  and  left  for  home  immediately.  My 
niece  met  me  at  the  door  and  said,  "I'm  glad  you 
have  come,  for  the  baby  is  worse."  He  was  in  a 
feverish  stupor.  The  doctor  was  sent  for,  and  after 
some  search  was  found  half  intoxicated  in  a  saloon, 
which  accounted  for  his  absence  at  the  rehearsal. 
After  an  examination  he  said  the  baby  had  all  the 
symptoms  of  pneumonia,  and  must  have  a  bath 
quickly.  The  water,  already  heated  for  the  purpose, 
was  brought  in.  He  tried  to  take  the  child  from  my 
arms  by  force  and  put  him  into-  the  hot  water  before 
it  was  reduced  to  the  right  temperature.  My  hus- 
band came  in  after  the  bath,  and  thinking  I  had  be- 
come unnecessarily  concerned,  he  proceeded  to  tell 
us  that  everything  was  in  readiness  at  the  church. 
The  doctor  had  forgotten  the  entertainment.  He 


IO8  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

was  anxious  for  the  duet,  and  advised  that  the  baby 
be  wrapped  up  in  a  shawl  or  blanket  and  left  on  the 
bed,  saying  that  he  would  be  all  right  when  we  re- 
turned. Before  leaving  he  said  he  would  see  us  at 
the  church,  but  we  did  not  go. 

The  day  was  past  and  the  night  gathered  her 
shadows  in  the  canon  about  our  home,  and  under  it 
my  soul  brooded  in  heaviness.  I  believed  that  God 
had  permitted  affliction  to  chasten  us  and  begged 
Him  to  stay  the  hand  of  death  that  was  reaching  out 
over  us.  I  was  looking  into  an  open  grave.  The 
stillness  in  the  room  was  broken  two  hours  later, 
when  some  persons  returned  from  the  church  to  tell 
us  that  the  Christmas  entertainment  was  a  failure, 
and  the  people  had  gone  away  disappointed.  The 
latter  part  of  the  night  I  was  left  to  watch  alone.  I 
took  this  opportunity  to  pour  out  my  soul  in  prayer 
to  God,  but  received  no  assurance  that  the  baby 
would  recover.  After  a  fearful  struggle  I  gave  him 
up  and  became  resigned  to  the  will  of  God. 

There  was  not  much  change  in  him  until  about 
noon  the  next  day,  when  he  rapidly  grew  worse. 
The  doctor  was  somewhere  trying  to  sober  up  after 
his  drunken  debauch,  so  another  physician  was 
called,  a  stranger  in  town,  who  after  seeing  the  child 
expressed  little  hope  for  his  recovery.  This  was  no 
surprise  to  me,  but  was  startling  to  my  husband, 
whom  I  had  not  been  able  to  convince  of  his  danger. 
Had  he  seen  it  before  it  would  have  been  a  great 
relief  to  me  and  made  it  much  easier  for  me  to  be- 
come reconciled. 

At  3  o'clock  the  following  morning  he  was  fast 


CRY  FOR  PURITY.  IO9 

sinking.  His  head  was  drawn  back  and  his  eyes 
were  setting  in  death.  As  a  last  remedy  the  doctor 
was  applying  a  mustard  plaster  to  the  back  of  his 
neck.  They  called  me  to  see  him  breathe  his  last. 
My  husband  in  great  sorrow  said,  "He  will  never 
look  on  our  faces  again,"  then  turned  and  went 
quickly  into  his  study.  The  child,  to  him,  was 
strangely  wrapt  up  in  a  covenant  made  with  God  in 
a  day  of  fasting  and  prayer  on  the  mountain  side 
before  his  birth.  He  promised  to  press  with  all  his 
soul  into  the  deep  of  the  divine  life  and  walk  the 
pathway  of  absolute  faith  and  trust  in  the  fullest 
abandonment  to  God.  Relax  in  his  covenant,  as  he 
entered  the  study,  he  fell  on  his  knees  and  cried  out, 
"I  will,  Lord,  I  will  keep  it !"  Receiving  assurance, 
he  came  out  and  said  to  me,  "I  believe  God  is  going 
to  spare  his  life."  The  critical  hour  of  this  night 
soon  passed  and  the  baby  was  better.  The  next  few 
months  that  followed  were  months  of  furnace  fires 
through  which  Mr.  White  passed  and  the  child's  life 
wavered  as  he  wavered.  He  was  unconsciously  in  a 
heart  bondage  of  servitude  to  the  church  officials  and 
dignitaries.  He  had  allowed  them  to  come  between 
him  and  God  or  so  to  influence  him  that  God  could 
not  have  his  way.  He  sought  to  please  and  have  the 
approval  of  flesh  and  blood.  After  the  bonds  were 
burnt  off  and  he  stood  free  in  Christ,  he  looked  bacK 
and  marveled  to  see  how  God  had  steadied  him  in 
the  furnace  with  a  baby's  hand.  This  was  kept  as  a 
secret  in  his  own  heart  and  referred  to,  after  a  time, 
with  reserve  and  a  deep  sense  of  God's  dealings  with 
him. 


IIO  BOOKING  BACK  FROM  BE)UL,AH. 

The  doctor  was  present,  and  heard  the  prayer 
in  the  adjoining  room,  also  the  surprising  statement 
that  God  would  spare  his  life.  But  he  took  the  credit 
to  himself  and  was  building  up  a  reputation  on  the 
strength  of  it,  when  his  own  little  girl  and  two  other 
child  patients  suddenly  died.  God  says  in  His  word 
that  He  will  not  give  His  glory  to  another. 

After  this,  more  than  ever,  ve  desired  to  see  the 
salvation  of  the  lost,  and  held  a  revival  meeting  with 
the  assistance  of  two  pastors,  but  little  was  accom- 
plished. Sorely  grieved  over  the  results,  I  deter- 
mined to  fast  and  pray  to  ascertain  if  possible  what 
was  in  the  way.  We  prayed  for  the  church  members 
and  outsiders,  calling  them  by  name,  when  the  Spirit 
whispered  to  me,  "Pray  for  yourself."  As  the 
search-light  was  turned  on  my  heart,  discoveries 
were  made  which  astonished  me,  and  I  cried  out  for 
deliverance.  Longing  for  purity  the  old  self  life 
became  more  and  more  offensive,  and  no  one  but  God 
understood  the  cry  of  my  soul. 


CHAPTER  X. 

CONSECRATION   AND   SANCTIFICATION. 

One  Sunday  evening  the  organist  was  absent 
and  I  took  her  place.  The  pastor  did  not  have  lib- 
erty and  the  Spirit  moved  me  to  give  an  exhortation. 
There  was  an  intense  burning  in  my  breast.  I  was 
confronted  with  past  failures  and  the  suffering  they 
brought,  and  felt  the  Holy  Spirit  for  the  last  time 
trying  to  press  me  out  and  that  I  must  seize  the  op- 
portunity or  lose  all. 

Thoughts  of  Naaman  the  Syrian  were  going 
through  my  mind  and  the  awful  leprosy  of  sin  of 
which  his  disease  was  a  type.  The  enemy  reminded 
me  that  there  was  a  book  lying  near  with  a  song  in 
it  entitled  "Naaman  the  Leper,"  and  suggested  that 
I  sing  this  song  instead  of  trying  to  speak.  There 
was  no  trouble  in  finding  it,  for  it  was  the  last  piece 
in  the  book.  I  had  sung  only  a  part  of  the  first  verse 
when  my  eyes  and  voice  failed  me  and  the  result  was 
a  complete  break-down.  There  were  two  persons  in 
the  congregation  who  paid  more  than  any  of  the 
others  on  the  salary,  who  did  not  believe  in  women 
preaching.  Satan  reminded  me  of  this,  and  to  dis- 
please them  might  cut  off  our  support,  and  help  fulfill 
the  predictions  of  our  opposers  that  we  wrould  not 
get  a  living  in  the  town.  For  a  moment  the  conflict 
was  desperate.  Throwing  the  book  aside  I  stood 


in 


112  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

trembling  before  the  congregation,  when  instantly 
my  lips  were  touched  with  a  live  coal  and  a  fiery 
stream  of  words  went  forth.  All  fear  left  me.  I  had 
discovered  the  secret  of  preaching.  It  was  not  in 
carefully  prepared  or  written  sermons,  but  by  His 
Spirit.  The  message  came  direct  from  heaven  and 
struck  the  audience  with  such  power  that  they  sat 
spellbound.  A  young  man  said  afterward  that  he 
felt  the  bottomless  pit  was  opening  to  receive  him.  I 
wondered  if  this  anointing  would  abide. 

After  leaving  the  church  my  soul  was  plunged 
into  greater  darkness  than  ever.  Like  Job  the 
thing  that  I  feared  came  upon  me.  The  Holy  Spirit 
had  taught  me  one  of  the  greatest  lessons  of  my  life 
in  momentarily  resting  upon  me  in  the  endument 
of  power.  The  temple  was  unclean,  hence  He  could 
not  abide.  In  anguish  I  cried : 

"Return,  O  Holy  dove,  return, 

Sweet  messenger  of  rest; 
I  hate  the  sins  that  made  Thee  mourn 

And  drove  Thee  from  my  breast." 

In  this  dreadful  darkness  I  was  left  without 
human  help  or  sympathy  to  weep  over  my  desola- 
tion. I  asked  my  husband  to  pray  for  me,  and  after 
offering  a  lew  words  he  expressed  himself  as  not  be- 
ing able  to  understand  me,  and  retired,  leaving  me 
alone. 

Jeremiah  (17:9  R.  V.)  says,  "The  heart  is  de- 
ceitful above  all  things  and  desperately  sick."  The 
blood  of  Christ  was  the  only  antidote,  and  this  could 
become  effectual  only  through  consecration  and 
faith.  Had  there  been  some  one  to  instruct  me,  I 


CONSECRATION.  113 

would  perhaps  have  been  saved  from  the  two  weeks' 
struggle  which  followed ;  however,  the  Spirit  enabled 
me  to  take  the  definite  steps  of  consecration  and  all 
was  on  the  altar  for  time  and  eternity.  I  had  great 
ambition  to  have  my  voice  cultivated  and  had  spent 
much  time  and  money  on  it,  but  now  I  turned  it 
over  to  the  Lord  to  be  a  success  or  failure  as  He  saw 
fit.  Amemg  the  last  things  surrendered  was  coffee, 
and  from  this  time  I  had  no  more  desire  for  it.  All 
my  efforts  before  had  failed.  Now  with  the  aid  of 
Jesus,  and  for  His  sake,  it  was  made  easy  for  me. 
To  Him  be  all  the  glory.  And  now  that  all  was  on 
tlie"  altar,  I  wondered  that  the  fire  did  not  fall.  My 
husband  noticed  the  depression  that  had  settled  down 
upon  me  and  determined  to  delay  no  longer  in  tak- 
ing me  to  see  Dr.  Yoakum. 

On  the  1 5th  of  March,  nine  days  after  I  had 
made  my  consecration,  he  introduced  me  to  the  sanc- 
tified physician.  He  received  me  very  cordially  and 
after  asking  me  some  questions  about  our  work  he 
said,  "I  understand  you  have  been  preaching.  This 
embarrassed  me  and  he  changed  the  subject,  avoid- 
ing questions  concerning  my  health.  He  had  learned 
that  soul  sickness  was  worse  than  that  of  the  body 
and  needed  a  remedy  first.  It  was  an  inspiration  to 
hear  him  tell  how  he  fasted  and  waited  before  God 
for  heart  cleansing  and  how  wonderfully  God  came 
him.  It  was  a  longer  period  than  I  had  ever  ab- 
stained from  food.  He  said  that  he  believed  that  I 
was  fully  consecrated  and  asked  me  to  receive  sancti- 
fication  at  once  by  faith.  While  upon  our  knees  I 
agreed  to  do  so  on  God's  word.  Patients  were  wait- 


114  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUL,AH. 

ing,  and  we  felt  it  would  not  be  right  to  take  any 
more  of  his  time,  and  retired.  We  had  not  gone 
more  than  a  block  when  the  enemy  accused  me  of 
being  a  hypocrite  in  claiming  something  I  did  not 
have.  Frightened  at  the  thought,  I  let  go  my  hold 
on  the  promises,  and  my  soul  remained  in  darkness. 
After  returning  home,  I  fasted,  prayed  and  searched 
the  Bible  more  persistently  than  ever.  Almost  every 
place  that  it  opened  my  eyes  rested  on  some  passage 
of  Scripture  relating  to  holiness.  I  read,  "Follow 
peace  with  all  men  and  holiness,  without  which  no 
man  shall  see  the  Lord."  (Heb.  12:14.);  "Be  ye 
holy,  for  I  am  holy"  (Lev.  19:2;  I.  Peter  i  :i6)  ; 
"Put  on  the  new  man  created  in  righteousness  and 
true  holiness"  (Eph.  4:24;  "That  we  should  be  holy 
before  Him"  (Eph.  1 14)  ;  "This  is  the  will  of  God, 
even  your  sanctification"  (I.  Thes.  4:3).  There 
was  no  going  back.  I  must  go  through  at  any  cost, 
for  it  was  now  holiness  or  hell. 

On  the  1 6th  I  went  into  my  husband's  study 
and  asked  him  if  he  had  any  books  on  the  second 
work  of  grace.  He  pointed  to  a  corner  on  a  book 
shelf  where  there  was  a  number  by  different  authors, 
among  which  were  Daniel  Steele's  "Love  En- 
throned," Bishop  Foster's  "Christian  Purity,"  J.  A. 
Wood's  "Perfect  Love,"  Wesley's  "Christian  Per- 
fection." and  M.  W.  Knapp's  "Out  of  Egypt  into 
Canaan."  The  title  of  the  last  book  impressed  me, 
and  I  thought,  this  must  be  what  I  need.  I  had 
experienced  a  hard  struggle  in  the  Egyptian  bond- 
age of  sin,  before  crossing  the  Red  Sea  of  conver- 
sion, and  now,  for  many  years,  had  made  a  beaten 


SANCTIFICATION.  115 

path  through  the  wilderness.  The  book  told  of  the 
Canaan  experience  also,  but  to  this  I  was  a  stranger. 
I  had  been  in  sight  of  Jordan  for  many  days,  now 
my  feet  were  at  its  water's  edge.  The  manna  that 
had  fallen  from  Heaven,  on  which  I  had  fed,  was 
wonderfully  sweet,  and  the  waters  that  had  flowed 
from  the  smitten  rock,  often  quenched  my  burning 
thirst.  But  now  the  promised  land,  with  its  luscious 
fruits,  was  lying  out  before  me.  There  was  milk 
and  honey,  old  corn  and  new  wine,  yet  between  me 
and  this  wonderful  land  rolled  a  river  overflowing 
its  banks.  The  spiritual  manna  brought  from  the 
wilderness  had  become  worm  eaten  and  moldy.  God 
gave  me  a  glimpse  of  something  better  that  he  had 
in  store  for  me.  No  longer  fearing  the  giants  in 
the  land,  the  only  question  was  how  to  enter  in. 
Almost  prostrated  I  said,  "Lord,  I  must  have  help !" 
I  must  cross  over  quickly !  I  can't  hold  out  'much 
longer!  I  knew  another  moment  of  vital  impor- 
tance was  at  hand,  and  the  matter  if  ever  settled 
must  be  settled  then.  I  dared  not  sleep,  so  spent 
the  night  in  prayer.  The  morning  dawned  and  ap- 
parently no  progress  had  been  made,  unless  it  was 
an  increased  desire  to  possess  the  land. 

In  the  after  part  of  the  second  night,  I  con- 
cluded to  sleep  a  little  in  hopes  that  I  might  awake 
in  Canaan.  I  awoke  just  as  the  clock  was  striking 
seven,  disappointed  to  find  myself  still  on  the  wilder- 
ness side. 

It  was  not  God's  plan  to  take  me  over  in  my 
sleep.  The  event  was  of  too  much  importance.  It 
was  now  the  i8th  of  March,  1893,  fifteen  years 


Il6        LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BKULAH. 

after  my  conversion.  Almost  two  sleepless  days 
and  nights  had  been  spent  in  fasting  and  prayer, 
and  in  searching  holiness  books  and  scriptural  texts 
on  the  subject,  which  I  read  and  reread,  but  all  had 
failed.  The  darkness  was  growing  more  intense 
and  my  soul  was  on  the  verge  of  despair. 

My  husband  had  a  slight  attack  of  the  asthma 
and  slept  for  a  few  nights  in  an  adjoining  room, 
where  he  could  breathe  easier,  and  knew  nothing 
of  the  ordeal  through  which  I  was  passing  until  I 
went  to  his  room  a  fewr  minutes  after  seven  o'clock 
and  told  him  all.  He  was  very  much  surprised  and 
could  hardly  believe  me.  I  told  him  I  could  never 
help  him  again  in  his  church  work,  for  I  had  utterly 
failed  to  receive  the  blessing  I  had  been  seeking, 
and  there  was  nothing  awaiting  me  but  darkness 
and  death.  With  the  help  of  the  Spirit  he  said  all 
he  could  to  encourage  me;  when  at  a  loss  for  some- 
thing more,  he  waited,  and  then  added,  "Jesus  loves 
you  more  than  I  do,  more  than  any  earthly  friend.'' 
I  felt  myself  sinking  when  he  said,  "The  everlasting 
arms  are  beneath  you."  This  was  almost  too  won- 
derful to  be  true.  At  that  moment  I  saw  Jesus  on 
the  cross  looking  upon  me  with  great  pity  and  com- 
passion. The  thorns  were  pressing  His  brow  while 
the  blood  trickled  down  His  cheeks.  Never  had  I 
seen  such  a  picture.  Only  a  moment  were  my  eyes 
fixed  upon  Him  when  I  was  enabled  to  say,  "His 
blood  cleanseth  me  from  all  sin,  and  underneath  are 
the  everlasting  arms."  In  the  twinkling  of  an  eye 
my  feet  were  placed  on  holy  ground.  There  was  no 
particular  manifestation  of  God's  power,  but  great 


SANCTIFICATION.  1 1/ 

soul  rest.  The  enemy  suggested  that  the  blessing 
was  not  great  enough  and  I  must  have  something 
more  before  I  could  claim  sanctification.  I  said: 
"Get  thee  behind  me  Satan,  the  temple  is  cleansed, 
and  henceforth  the  abiding  place  of  the  Holy  Ghost." 
There  was  a  deep  sense  of  purity  such  as  I  had  never 
known  before.  My  heart,  which  had  been  like  a 
whited  sepulchre,  was  now  transparent,  and  if  it 
were  possible,  I  would  have  been  willing  for  the 
whole  world  to  have  seen  it.  There  were  no  fears 
of  the  Comforter  leaving.  I  knew  that  He  would 
stay  in  such  a  heart.  Nine  years  have  passed  and 
His  indwelling  presence  has  ever  been  an  abiding 
one.  At  times  when  severely  tested,  I  have  stood  by 
faith  alone  and  claimed  the  victory,  saying :  "The 
blood  cleanseth,  the  blood  cleanseth  just  now." 

My  soul  had  at  last  awakened  as  if  in  obedience 
to  the  command  of  the  prophet  who  said,  "Awake, 
awake,  put  on  thy  strength,  O  Zion;  put  on  thy 
beautiful  garments — shake  thyself  from  the  dust — 
loose  the  bands  from  off  thy  neck,  O  captive  daugh- 
ter of  Zion."  (Isa.  52  :i-2.) 

My  bands  were  broken,  I  had  arisen  from  the 
dust  and  was  clothed  in  white.  The  prophet  added, 
"Therefore  my  people  shall  know  my  name;  there- 
fore they  shall  know  in  that  day  that  I  am  he  that 
doth  speak;  behold  it  is  I."  (Isa.  52  :  6.)  He  had 
spoken  to  my  soul,  and  I  knew  the  truth  of  His 
word.  "His  name  shall  be  called  Jesus  for  He  shall 
save  His  people  from  their  sins."  (Math,  i  :2i.) 
"Therefore  Jesus  also,  that  He  might  sanctify  the 
people  with  His  own  blood,  suffered  without  the 


1  18  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


gate."  (Heb.  13  :i2.)  He  not  only  saved  me  from 
actual  transgressions,  but  had  cleansed  me  from  in- 
bred corruption.  The  Lord  made  bare  His  holy 
arm  and  I  knew  His  great  salvation.  "The  wil- 
derness and  the  solitary  place  was  made  glad  and 
the  desert  blossomed  as  a  rose."  The  problem  of 
years  was  solved,  and  I  had  found  what  was  des- 
tined to  fill  the  whole  earth. 

When  Kepler's  unflagging  toil  of  seventeen 
years  was  rewarded  by  the  glorious  triumph  which 
resulted  in  the  discovery  of  the  great  laws  which 
made  his  name  famous,  in  his  rapture  over  his  suc- 
cess he  exclaimed,  "Nothing  holds  me.  The  die 
is  cast.  The  book  is  written,  to  be  read  now  or  by 
posterity,  I  care  not  which.  It  may  well  await  a 
century  for  a  reader,  since  God  has  waited  six  thou- 
sand years  for  an  observer."  Kepler  knew  that  the 
tmth  of  his  discovery  must  be  accepted  sooner  or 
later.  They  were  God's  laws  which  had  been  in  op- 
eration since  the  morning  stars  sang  together  and 
were  co-existant  with  Himself.  "Be  ye  holy  as  I 
am  Holy,"  is  provided  for,  Peter  says,  by  "the  pre- 
cious blood  of  Christ,  who  verily  was  foreordained 
before  the  foundation  of  the  world."  (I  Peter  i  : 
16-20.)  and  was  typified  by  the  bloody  sacrifice 
which  Abel  brought  as  an  offering  for  sin.  God's 
eternal  foreknowledge  of  Christ's  redeeming  sacri- 
fice and  purpose  to  have  us  sanctified  through  it,  adds 
to  the  meaning  and  obligation  of  our  receiving  and 
maintaining  a  holy  life  before  Him. 

I  had  been  a  member  of  the  Methodist  church 
for  nineteen  years  and  had  heard  ministers,  presid- 


SANCTIFICATION.  1 19 

ing  elders  and  bishops  preach,  but  did  not  remem- 
ber of  ever  having  heard  a  definite  clear-cut  sermon 
on  the  second  work  of  grace,  yet  this  doctrine  has 
been  called  "the  brightest  star  in  the  constellation  of 
Methodism."  Unsanctified  preachers  are  afraid  to 
have  it  preached  in  their  churches  for  fear  of  losing 
their  carnal  members.  They  can't  stand  Bible  truth. 
An  old  veteran  with  years  of  experience  humorously 
said,  "If  one  wants  to  get  along  easily  in  the  popular 
churches  of  to-day,  he  must  not  tinker  with  re'- 
ligion." 

"No  man  putteth  a  piece  of  new  cloth  into  an 
old  garment,  for  that  which  is  put  in  to  fill  it  up 
taketh  from  the  garment,  and  the  rent  is  made 
worse."  (Matt.  9:16.)  The  new  cloth  shows  the 
old  filthy  rags  of  depravity  to  a  disadvantage,  and 
when  the  exposure  is  made  there  naturally  arises 
division.  Many  people  are  spending  their  lives  in 
the  old  bottle  and  rag  business.  They  have  become 
so  accustomed  to  handling  these  goods  that  it  is  im- 
possible to  induce  them  to  deal  in  any  other.  Never- 
theless, the  new  bottles  and  garments  can  be  had 
when  the  conditions  are  met  and  the  price  is  paid. 
Fifteen  years  handling  old  bottles  and  patching  old 
garments  was  enough  for  me. 

Sam  Jones  relates  an  incident  of  a  revival  meet- 
ing in  the  south  where  a  holiness  evangelist  was  in 
charge.  There  was .  a  cry  that  the  church  was  in 
danger  of  being  split.  Mr.  Jones  told  them  that 
if  this  were  true  there  was  hope,  for  in\that  case 
a  part  of  it  would  be  saved,  but  he  very  much  feared 
it  was  like  an  old  gum  log  and  could  not  be  split.  Rev. 


120  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

J.  A.  Woods  says,  "No  legitimate  efforts  to  pro- 
mote holiness  tend  to  division  among  Christians. 
The  direct  opposite  of  this  is  true.  Sin  alienates 
and  divides;  holiness  unites  and  binds  together,  and 
constitutes  the  strongest  bond  of  union  in  the  church 
of  God.  Any  other  union  in  the  church  is  but  a 
rope  of  sand." — Perfect  Love,  p.  277. 


CHAPTER  XL 

THE  BIBLE  A  NEW  BOOK. 

The  Bible  became  a  new  book  to  me.  I  found 
that  the  Old  Testament  abounded  in  holiness  typol- 
ogy, while  every  page  of  the  New  Testament  was 
aflame  with  its  doctrines  and  experiences.  Great 
gold  mines  of  truth  opened  to  me  and  my  soul  was 
in  ecstacy  over  the  shining  nuggets.  Ah,  thou 
subtle  lurking  foe ;  thou  arch  fiend  of  the  pit !  Thou 
hadst  cheated  me  out  of  my  inheritance  and  kept 
me  from  these  precious  treasures,  while  my  soui 
groped  in  the  mists  and  shadows  of  a  twilight  ex- 
perience. Like  the  blind  man  after  receiving  the 
first  touch,  I  had  seen  men  as  trees  walking,  and 
was  frightened  with  forms  that  were  not  real.  Bish- 
ops, presiding  elders,  many  preachers  and  evange- 
lists, especially  those  of  great  learning,  had  assumed 
immense  proportions  through  my  distorted  vision. 
Perhaps  Nebuchadnezzar's  image  on  the  plains  of 
Dura  did  not  excel  them  in  stature,  but  Jesus,  the 
great  eye  opener,  who  touched  me  the  second  time, 
brought  all  down  to  one  common  level,  and  some  of 
them  looked  wonderfully  small.  I  saw  that  the 
things  that  are  highly  esteemed  among  men  are  an 
abomination  in  the  sight  of  God.  All  the  self-seek- 
ing, money-loving,  conference  wire  pulling,  savors 

of  the  old  man,  and  is  in  the  domain  of  the  world 
121 


122  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUL,AH. 

of  which  Satan  is  the  Prince.  In  the  temptation  in 
the  wilderness  Jesus  resisted  these  forces  of  evil,  and 
so  does  the  Christ-like  ministry.  The  conference 
giants,  who  cause  little  preachers  and  their  wives 
to  walk  softly  before  them,  are  brought  to  a  focus 
through  the  great  lens  of  spiritaul  truth  and  found 
to  be  weaklings  and  dwarfs. 

THE   IMPORTANCE   OF   DEFINITE   TESTIMONY. 

One  of  my  first  impressions  after  receiving  the 
blessing  was  that  I  had  been  so  long  in  the  wilder- 
ness under  incompetent  leaders,  who  failed  to  de- 
clare the  whole  counsel  of  God,  that  I  felt  now  my 
light  must  be  put  on  a  candlestick  that  persons  'n 
the  dark,  as  I  had  been,  might  be  benefited  thereby. 
His  word  says  "Ye  are  my  witnesses,"  and  I  knew 
if  the  blessing  were  retained  I  must  take  a  stand  and 
give  forth  no  uncertain  sound.  "For  whosoever 
shall  be  ashamed  of  me  and  of  my  words,  of  him 
shall  the  Son  of  Man  be  ashamed  when  He  shall 
come  in  His  own  glory,  and  in  His  Father's,  and 
of  the  holy  angels."  (Luke  9  126. )  A  treasure  was 
committed  to  my  care  and  I  must  be  a  faithful  stew- 
ard. He  had  sanctified  me  wholly  beyond  the  pos- 
sibility of  doubt.  My  God  had  so  puTmy  feet  on 
the  rock  that  there  were  not  men,  devils  or  creeds 
enough  to  convince  me  otherwise. 

For  fifteen  years  I  had  tried  to  get  a  better  ex- 
perience by  works,  but  had  utterly  failed.  Now  at 
last  consecration  and  simple  faith  in  the  blood 
brought  the  pearls  of  great  price  into  my  possession, 
and  my  soul  reveled  in  its  beauty.  Two  hours  after 
I  received  the  blessing  my  husband  left  to  hold  a 


THE  BIBLE  A  NEW  BOOK.  123 

meeting  in  another  church  on  his  charge,  but  before 
the  day  was  passed  I  was  impressed  that  I  ought  to 
write  to  him  and  tell  him  that  there  was  not  a 
shadow  of  a  doubt  in  my  mind  that  the  Lord  had 
sanctified  me  wholly.  The  words  were  no  sooner 
written  than  my  heart  began  to  overflow  with  joy. 
This  was  the  Lord's  way  of  having  me  testify.  I 
said,  "I  will  tell  it,  Lord !  I  will  tell  it !" 

Satan  took  advantage  of  my  nerves  that  were 
weakened  through  years  of  suffering,  but  I  found 
God's  word  true,  "When  the  enemy  shall  come  in 
like  a  flood,  the  Spirit  of  the  Lord  shall  life  up  a 
standard  against  him."  (Isa.  59:19.)  Before  a 
week  had  passed  a  thousand  demons  were  clutching 
at  my  pearl,  and  here  I  learned  that  the  outward  at- 
tacks of  the  enemy  had  nothing  to  do  with  the  con- 
dition of  the  soul  life  within.  The  blood  cleansed 
from  all  sin  and  Jesus  was  enthroned.  I  could  truly 
say,  "The  Lord  God  omnipotent  reigneth." 

It  was  far  more  difficult  to  tell  my  experience 
to  our  brethren  in  the  ministry  than  to  others.  The 
water  that  was  turned  to  wine  was  first  carried  to 
the  governor  of  the  feast,  who  could  not  understand 
why  the  best  wine  was  kept  until  the  last,  neither 
did  these  brethren  understand  me. 

In  second  Kings,  seventh  chapter,  we  read  that 
when  the  famine  was  raging  in  Samaria,  and  the 
four  lepers  found  the  abundant  supplies  left  by  the 
Syrians,  they  said  one  to  another,  "We  do  not  well : 
this  day  is  a  day  of  good  tidings,  and  we  hold  our 
peace;  if  we  tarry  till  the  morning  light,  some  mis- 
chief will  come  upon  us;  now  therefore  come,  that 


124  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

we  may  go  and  tell  the  king's  household."  They 
had  plundered  the  first  tent,  ate,  drank,  and  carried 
away  from  thence  silver  and  gold  and  hid  it,  but 
not  until  they  reached  the  second  tent  did  they  so 
reason  among  themselves  and  go  and  tell  the  news 
to  the  famishing  multitudes  inside  the  walls  of  the 
besieged  city.  I  found  riches  in  the  .tent  of  regener- 
ation, but  did  not  get  much  beyond  a  supply  for 
myself.  Now  that  I  had  entered  into  the  second 
tent  and  found  an  abundance  for  all,  I  was  sure  that 
some  mischief  would  befall  me  if  I  did  not  carry 
the  glad  tidings  to  the  "King's  household." 

Elisha  prophesied  on  this  occasion:  "Tomor- 
row about  this  time  shall  a  measure  of  fine  flour  be 
sold  for  a  shekel  and  two  measures  of  barley  for  a 
shekel  in  the  gates  of  Samaria."  This  was  a  very 
low  price  for  food,  when  it  could  not  be  had  at  any 
cost  and  mothers  were  eating  their  own  babes.  So 
great  a  change  in  twenty-four  hours  seemed  impos- 
sible, and  a  lord  on  whose  hand  the  King  leaned 
doubted  the  prophet  of  God  and  said,  "Behold,  if 
the  Lord  would  make  windows  in  heaven,  might  this 
thing  be?"  The  prophet  said,  "Behold,  thou  shalt 
see  it  with  thine  eyes  but  shalt  not  eat  thereof." 
At  the  stated  time  the  next  dav  this  lord,  whom  the 

M> 

king  appointed  to  have  charge  of  the  gate,  was  trod- 
den upon  and  died.  He  saw,  but  ate  not  thereof. 

Many  persons  are  walking  through  the  gates  of 
dead  ecclesiasticisms,  over  the  bodies  of  pastors, 
presiding  elders  and  bishops,  in  search  of  the  bread 
of  life.  If  these  persons,  having  charge  of  the  gates, 


THE  BIBLE  A  NEW  BOOK.  125 

fail  to  swing;  them  open  and  let  the  people  through, 
they  will  be  trampled  under  foot  as  was  this  lord. 

"Woe  unto  you  -scribes,  and  Pharisees,  hypo- 
crites !  for  ye  shut  up  the  kingdom  of  heaven  against  \ 
men ;  for  ye  neither  go  in  yourselves,  neither  suffer  ' 
ye  them  that  are  entering  to  go  in.     *     *     *     Thou 
blind  Pharisee,  cleanse  that  first  which  is  within  the 
cup  and  platter,  that  the  outside  of  them  may  be 
clean  also."     Jesus  compared  them  to  "whited  sep- 
ulchers,"   which   indeed   appear  beautiful   outward, 
but  are  within  full  of  dead  men's  bones  and  all  un- 
cleanness."     (Matt.  23  113,  26,  27.) 

The  sanctified  eye  will  enable  you  to  detect  the 
cesspools  of  iniquity  in  high  places  as  well  as  down 
in  the  slums.  Let  the  great  Surgeon  remove  the 
beam  (of  depravity)  out  of  your  eye  "and  you  will 
be  able  to  see  clearly  to  locate  the  mote  .that  is  in 
your  brother's  eye.  "The  light  of  the  body  is  the 
eye ;  if  therefore  thine  eye  be  single,  thy  whole  body 
shall  be  full  of  light."  When  carnality  is  removed 
through  the  sanctifying  fires  of  the  Holy  Ghost 
things  are  brought  to  a  proper  focus  through  a 
purely  spiritual  lens,  and  not  until  then  can  the  eye 
be  single.  Many  persons  who  once  had  light  now 
have  none.  Refusing  to  walk  in  the  light,  they  have 
forfeited  what  they  had.  Truly  their  darkness  is 
great. 

Hosts  of  so-called  pastors,  instead  of  leading 
their  flocks  to  green  fields,  are  guarding  gates  to 
keep  them  out.  Instead  of  being  a  Caleb  or  a  Joshua 
in  trying  to  get  the  people  to  go  forward  at  the 
command  of  God.  and  possess  the  land  (Numbers 


126  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

14  Ch.),  they  act  the  part  of  the  ten  spies,  whose 
names  are  not  worth  remembering,  declaring  the 
land  can  not  be  possessed.  From  this  direful  calam- 
ity, the  Apostle  in  Hebrews  exhorts  the  Christians 
to  fear  lest  they  fail  to  enter  into  their  inheritance 
through  a  similar  unbelief. 

Two  out  of  the  twelve  chosen  to  explore  the 
land  believed  God's  word.  Is  this  the  proportion 
of  the  ministry  that  believe  to-day?  The  ten  with 
their  giants  and  fears  blocked  the  way,  and  turned 
Isreal  into  the  desert.  How  many  supposed  spir- 
itual guides  to-day  are  saying,  "It  can  not  be  pos- 
sessed," and  are  turning  hungry  multitudes  into  the 
desert  to  languish  and  die!  Canaan  does  not  stand 
for  heaven,  but  for  the  sanctified  life.  "We  which 
have  believed  do  enter  into  rest."  (Heb.  4:3.) 

"I  am  drinking  at  the  fountain, 

Where  I  ever  would  abide; 
For  I've  tasted  life's  pure  river, 

And  my  soul  is  satisfied; 
There's  no  thirsting  for  life's  pleasures, 

Nor  adorning,  rich  and  gay, 
For  I've  found  a  richer  treasure, 

One  that  fadeth  not  away. 

"Is  not  this  the  land  of  Beulah? 

Blessed,  blessed  land  of  light, 
Where  the  flowers  bloom  forever, 

And  the  sun  is  always  bright. 

"I  can  see  far  down  the  mountain, 

Where  I  wandered  weary  years, 
Often  hindered  in  my  journey, 

By  the  ghosts  of  doubts  and  fears. 
Broken  vows  and  disappointments 

Thickly  sprinkled  all  the  way, 
But  the  Spirit  led  unerring 

To  the  land  I  hold  today." 


THE  BIBLE  A  NEW  BOOK.  I2/ 

"And  in  this  mountain  shall  the  Lord  of  host 
make  unto  all  people  a  feast  of  fat  things,  a  feast  of 
wines  on  the  lees,  of  fat  things  full  of  marrow,  of 
wines  on  the  lees  well  refined.  And  it  shall  be  said 
in  that  day,  Lo,  this  is  our  God ;  we  have  waited  for 
Him,  and  He  will  save  us :  this  is  the  Lord ;  we  have 
waited  for  Him,  we  will  be  glad  and  rejoice  in  His 
salvation." — (Isa.  25:6-9.) 

OUT  AND  INTO. 

The  following  beautiful  poem  contrasts  the 
Egypt  of  sin  with  the  Canaan  of  a  holy  life : 

"He  brought  us  out  *  *  that  He  might 
bring  us  in." — Deut.  6.23. 

"Out  of  the  distance  and  darkness  so  deep, 

Out  of  the  settled  and  perilous  sleep, 

Out  of  the  region  and  shadow  of  death, 

Out  of  its  foul  and  pestilent  breath, 

Out  of  the  bondage  and  wearying  chains. 

Out  of  companionship  ever  with  stains — 
Into  the  light  and  glory  of  God 
Into  the  holiest  made  clean  by  the  blood, 
Into  the  arms,  the  embrace  and  the  kiss, 
Into  the  scene  of  ineffable  bliss, 
Into  the  quiet,  of  Infinite  calm, 
Into  the  place  of  the  song  and  the  psalm. 

Wonderful  love  that'has  wrought  all  for  me; 

Wonderful  love  that  has  thus  set  me  free, 

Wonderful  ground  upon  which  I  have  come, 

Wonderful  tenderness  welcoming  home. 

"Out  of  the  horror  at  being  alone, 


128       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

Out  and  forever  of  being  my  own; 

Out  of  the  hardness  of  heart  and  of  will, 

Out  of  the  longings  which  nothing  could  fill. 

Out  of  the  bitterness,  madness  and  strife, 

Out -of  myself  and  all  I  call  life:  — 

Into  communion  with  Father  and  Son, 

Into  the  sharing  of  all  that  Corist  won; 

Into  ecstacies  full  to  the  brim, 

Into  the  having  of  all  things  with  Him. 

Into  Christ  Jesus,  there  ever  to  dwell, 

Into  more  blessings  than  words  e'er  can  tell. 

Wonderful  lowliness  draining  my  cup! 

Wonderful  purpose  that  ne'er  can  give  up! 

Wonderful  patience  that  waited  so  long, 

Wonderful  story  to  which  I  belong. 

"Out  of  my  poverty  into  His  wealth, 

Out  of  my  sickness  into  pure  health, 

Out  of  the  old  into  the  new, 

Out  of  the  false,  into  the  true. 

Out  of  what  measures  the  full  depth  of  "Lost." 

Out  of  it  all — but  an  infinite  cost! 

Into  what  must  with  the  cost  correspond, 
Into  that  which  there  is  nothing  beyond. 
Into  the  union  which  nothing  can  part, 
Into  what  fills  every  want  of  the  heart, 
Into  the  deepest  of  joys  ever  had — 
Into  the  gladness  of  making  God  glad? 

Wonderful  Persqn  whose  face  I  behold! 

Wonderful  story  then  all  to  be  told ! 

Wonderful  all  the  dread  way  that  He  trod, 

Wonderful  end,  he  has  brought  me  to  God!" 

— Unknown. 


BEULAH. 


Thou  shall  no  more  be  termed  Forsaken;  neither  shall 
thy  hand  any  more  be  termed  Desolate;  but  thou  shalt  be 
called  Hephzibah,  and  thy  land  Beulah:  for  the  Lord  de- 
lighteth  in  thee,  and  thy  land  shall  be  married.  And  as 
the  bridegroom  rejoiceth  over  the  bride,  so  shall  thy  God 
rejoice  over  thee. — Isa.  62:4-5. 

My  beloved  spake,  and  said  unto  me,  Rise  up,  my  love, 
my  fair  one,  and  come  away.  For  lo!  the  winter  is  past, 
the  rain  is  over  and  gone;  the  flowers  appear  on  the  earth; 
the  time  of  the  singing  of  birds  is  come,  and  the  voice  of 
the  turtle  is  heard  in  our  land. — Cant.  2:10-12. 

Now  1  saw  in  my  dream,  that  the  pilgrims  were  got 
over  the  Enchanted  Ground,  and  entering  in  the  country  of 
Beulah  (Isa.  62:4;  Cant.  2:10-12),  whose  air  was  very 
sweet  and  pleasant;  the  way  lying  directly  through  it,  they 
solaced  themselves  there  for  a  season.  Yea,  here  they 
heard  continually  the  singing  of  birds,  and  saw  every  day 
turtle  in  the  land.  In  this  country  the  sun  shineth  night 
and  day;  wherefore  this  was  beyond  the  Valley  of  the 
Shadow  of  Death,  and  also  out  of  the  reach  of  Giant 
Despair;  neither  could  they  from  this  place  so  much  as  see 
Doubting  Castle.  Here  they  were  within  sight  of  the  City 
they  were  going  to;  also  here  met  them  some  of  the  in- 
habitants thereof;  for  in  this  land  the  Shining  Ones  com- 
monly walked,  because  it  was  on  the  borders  of  heaven.  In 
this  land  also  the  contract  between  the  bride  and  the  bride- 
groom was  renewed;  yea,  here,  "as  the  bridegroom  re- 
joiceth over  his  bride  so  did  their  God  rejoice  over  them." 
Here  they  had  no  want  of  corn  and  wine;  for  in  this  place 
they  met  with  abundance  of  what  they  had  sought  for  in 
all  their  pilgrimage.  Here  they  heard  voices  from  out  of 
the  city,  loud  voices,  saying,  "Say  ye  to  the  daughter  of 
Zion,  'Behold  thy  salvation  cometh!  Behold,  His  reward  is 
with  Him!'  "  Here  all  the  inhabitants  of  the  country  called 
them  "The  holy  people,  and  redeemed  of  the  Lord,"  "sought 
out,"  etc. — Bunyan's  Pilgrim's  Progress. 


i  HAVE  THE  VICTORY. 


MRS.  KENT  V>  UIT«. 


,    1  The  blocxl  of    Je-sus  cleansetb  me,    1  have  the  vie  -  to  -  ry~\ 
\  From  ev-'ry  trace  of    H'HI'  J'm  free,  I  have  the  vic-to-ry;/ 

„    I  Tho'    in  the    fier  -  y   furnace  tried,.  I  have  the 
\  With   Je-sus  now  1  in  cm  -  ci  -  fled,    1  have  the 


vic-to-ry, 


I  On  wings  o.f  love  my  soul  mitr  ta  high'r,  I  have  the  vie  -  to  •  ry,  ) 
l  I've  found  in  him,  my  heart's  desire,  I  (Om/f.  ~  .  .  .  .  .  )f 
f  Tri-umphant  in  my  heart  I  sinj;,  I  have  the  vie  •  to  -  ry,  i 
I  My  troph-ies  all  to  him  \  bring,  1  ((Jniit )J 

^r^^-^^l^-^^^-f-^I^-O-,, 

^q^^z^^z^z^rzj^«^Kd.g=:^ — , — ^=t^x=l| 


t?-?^-j-i-fr-»-r-*7«— *"   r~*— 1"^~- ^-^-i^*-'-*^*  J"in  »-r»^»—  4^*^*- C:| 

have  the  victory.         Oh!  halicluj.ili,  sing  with  m  ,  I  ?ve  the  vie-to  ryT'     The 
-^^— «-    >  /-> 


blood  of  Jjsusc'eaajet^D^I -av'Tevic-to-ryT^   Th  bl  'd,  thebl<odt.my 
^^'^^•^•«  A    "-fc" 


have  the  vic-to-ry;   Thebl  od,  tie  bio  d,  it  clean  ethne,  I  ha^e  the  victory. 


3  With  freedom  now  from  inbred  Bin, 

_I  have  the  victory. 
While  Jesus  reigns  supreme- within, 

I  have  the  victory; 
Though  unseen  powers  pf  hell  awake, 

I  have  the  victory, 
Wo  foe«  ran  e'er  my  courage  shake, 

1  have  the  victory.  . 


4  He's  taken  all  my  doubts  away, 

1  have  the  victory, 
And  keeps  me  by  his'power  each  day. 

I  have  the  victory; 
Tho'  thousands  fall  at  my  right  hard 

I  have  the  victory, 
I've  found  the  >frace  wherein  we  stta^ 

I  have  the  victory. 


SABBATH     RKST.  131 

THE  SABBATH  A  TYPE  OF  THIS  REST. 

We  read  in  Hebrews  4  :g :  "There  re- 
maineth  a  rest  for  the  people  of  God,  or,  as  the  mar- 
gin says,  "A  keeping  of  the  Sabbath."  The  R.  V. 
gives  it,  "A  Sabbath  rest."  If  our  Seventh  Day 
Advent  brethren  would  but  rightly  interpret  the 
Sabbath,  they  would  seize  its  inner  meaning  with 
joy  and  leave  the  Saturday  Sabbath  alone,  which 
they  have  signally  failed  to  establish.  Have  they 
not  lost  the  substance  and  grasped  the  shadow  ?  We 
read,  "Verily  my  Sabbaths  ye  shall  keep;  for  it  is 
a  sign  between  me  and  you  throughout  your  gen- 
erations ;  that  ye  may  know  that  I  am  the  Lord 
that  doth  sanctify  you.  Ye  shall  keep  the  Sabbath 
therefore ;  for  it  is  hply  unto  you.  Every  one  that 
defileth  it  shall  surely  be  put  to  death.  It  is  a  sign 
between  me  and  the  children  of  Israel  forever." 
(Read  Exodus  31  :i3,  17.)  We  emphasize,  that  yc 
may  know  that  I  am  the  Lord  that  doth  sanctify  you. 
This  meaning  is  fully  carried  forward  into  the  New 
Testament. 

Many  are  the  proselytes  of  blind  guides.  They 
have  put  their  heads  in  a  noose  like  animals  being 
led  to  the  slaughter,  unconscious  of  their  awful 
doom,  the  fatal  blow  is  given  and  they  drop  spirit- 
ually dead  at  the  feet  of  their  murderers.  O  for  the 
light  to  reveal  the  cloven  hoof  of  sin !  The  twilight 
of  the  regenerated  experience  is  not  sufficient.  The 
noon-day  light  of  the  Sun  of  Righteousness  must 
flood  your  soul,  for  the  "natural  man  receiveth  not 
the  things  of  the  spirit  of  God,  for  they  are  foolish- 


132  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

ness  unto  him,  neither  can  he  discern  them,  for  they 
are  spiritually  discerned." 

When  Alexander,  the  world's  conqueror,  asked 
Diogenes  what  favor  he  might  bestow  upon  him, 
the  humble  philosopher  replied,  "Get  out  of  my  sun- 
shine." The  man  of  sin,  though  subjected  by  grace, 
eclipses  our  vision  of  the  true  Christ.  Paul  says 
the  body  of  sin  must  be  destroyed.  The  Holy  Ghost, 
the  great  executive  of  the  Godhead,  with  your  con- 
sent, will  put  him  to  death  now. 

ADDITIONAL  LIGHT. 

I  knew  nothing  of  the  holiness  movement,  hav- 
ing read  only  the  church  papers.  My  husband  and 
brother  were  both  preaching  without  the  experience, 
and  I  had  not  yet  learned  that  there  was  any  re- 
proach on  the  cause,  supposing  that  Methodists  were 
true  to  the  principles  on  which  Methodism  was 
founded.  I  did  not  know  that  backslidden  bishops 
and  presiding  elders  were  sending  preachers  to 
"Hardscrabble"  for  preaching  this  doctrine.  A  new 
world  was  opening  to  me. 

When  in  Dr.  Yoakum's  office  one  day,  he  hand- 
ed me  "The  Way  of  Faith,"  a  holiness  paper.  I  had 
never  seen  such  a  paper  before.  He  gave  me  a  copy 
to  take  home.  After  looking  it  over  I  found  it  to  be 
entirely  different  from  the  "Christian  Advocate" 
that  had  been  coming  to  our  home  for  years.  It 
was  food  for  my  soul.  A  few  days  later  he  sent  me 
another  publication  equally  as  good.  I  found  in  it 
liberal  offers  to  subscribers  and  immediately  began 
to  take  subscriptions  for  it.  Before  long  it  was  com- 
ing to  at  least  thirty  homes  on  my  husband's  charge. 


ADDITIONAL    LIGHT.  133 

Some  money  .that  was  given  to  me  as  a  Christmas 
present  was  used  in  sending  it  to  my  relatives. 

While  doing  all  that  I  could  to  spread  holiness, 
a  shadow  came  over  my  soul  as  I  thought  of  laying 
our  lives  on  the  altar  of  a  church  where  almost  the 
entire  membership  and  ministry  are  ignorant  of  this, 
the  crowning  doctrine  of  the  Bible,  and  look  upon 
it  as  a  delusion  or  some  sort  of  superstition  or  fanat- 
icism. Only  a  weakly  form  of  it  has  been  at  all  tol- 
erated. Where  it  rises  up  with  any  strength,  the 
old  Adam  nature  that  has  grown  to  enormous  pro- 
portions and  power  in  the  church,  with  all  the  cun- 
ning and  craft  of  the  old  serpent  in  Eden  and  the 
worldly  wisdom  of  man,  combine  to  crush  it  out. 
I  was  now  gradually  being  enlightened  on  the  sub- 
ject. 

My  husband  when  a  young  man  had  marked 
ability  as  a  financier,  but  we  had  willingly  sacrificed 
all  to  devote  our  entire  time  to  the  denomination 
that  we  believed  was  the  nearest  right.  We  were 
born  and  cradled  in  the  two  great  branches  of  Meth- 
odism, he  of  the  north  and  I  of  the  south.  I  made 
nearly  a  thousand  dollars  teaching  school  the  year 
before  we  were  married,  and  gave  up  this  position 
with  an  offer  of  increased  wages,  to  enter  a  life  of 
service  with  him  in  the  ministry. 

I  had  labored  also  to  help  educate  my  brother 
Charles,  whom  my  mother  had  dedicated  to  the 
ministry  when  a  child.  When  he  was  not  two  years 
old,  I  remember  the  anxious  look  on  her  face  as  she 
tossed  in  pain  on  her  bed  praying  to  God  to  spare 
her  life  to  hear  him  preach  the  gospel.  While  at- 


134  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

tending  school  at  Millersburg  he  was  led  into  the 
experience  of  holiness  by  one  of  the  students  and 
walked  in  the  light  of  it  for  several  months,  but  like 
many  others,  had  lost  it  before  he  became  estab- 
lished. 

SHORN   SAMSONS. 

After  Samson  had  laid  his  head  in  the  lap  of 
Delilah,  he  went  out  and  shook  himself,  but  wist  not 
that  the  Lord  had  departed  from  him. 

The  fallen  church,  which  Delilah  represents,  is 
everywhere  supporting  a  shorn  ministry.  Millions 
are  being  poured  into  her  coffers  to  pay  college  pro- 
fessors, presiding  elders  and  bishops,  with  their  clip- 
ping machines,  to  carry  on  the  wholesale  business  of 
shearing  the  prophets. 

Many  young  men  with  bright  experiences,  en- 
tering some  of  the  so-called  Christian  institutions, 
not  only  lose  their  experiences,  but  are  shaken  in 
their  orthodoxy  by  ideas  imbibed  from  dead  theo- 
logians, higher  criticism  and  other  subjects  det- 
rimental to  spiritual  life  and  growth. 

If  a  spiritual  young  man  runs  the  gauntlet  of 
the  colleges  and  seminaries  (often  properly  called 
cemeteries)  and  does  not  lose  his  locks,  or  get  struck 
down  too  dead  to  be  resurrected  as  a  preacher,  the 
clipping  machines  of  the  annual  conference  await 
him. 

Samson  in  the  glory  of  his  strength  rent  the 
lion  like  a  kid.  The  lords  of  the  Philistines  paid 
Delilah  large  sums  of  money,  and  furnished  the  ma- 
terial with  which  to  bind  him,  but  the  green  withes 
were  broken  as  tow  when  it  touches  the  fire.  Thev 


SHORN     SAMPSONS.  135 

bound  him  with  two  new  cords,  but  the  Spirit  of 
the  Lord  came  mightily  upon  him,  and  they  were 
broken  as  flax  that  is  burned  with  fire.  He  slew  a 
thousand  men  with  the  jaw  bone  of  an  ass. 

After  the  upper  room  believers  received  the 
baptism  of  the  Holy  Ghost  and  fire  they  could  no 
longer  be  bound  with  the  bands  of  Judaism,  neither 
will  the  bands  of  dead  ecclesiasticism  hold  a  man 
that  is  filled  with  the  Spirit.  He  must  have  liberty 
to  catch  the  foxes  and  tie  firebrands  to  their  tails 
to  destroy  the  fields  of  the  Philistines. 

The  seven  locks  of  his  head  were  woven  into  a 
web  and  fastened  to  the  beam  with  a  pin,  but  awak- 
ening out  of  his  sleep  he  walked  away  with  the 
beam.  Had  Samson  kept  his  head  out  of  the  lap  of 
Delilah,  he  would  have  escaped  the  calamity  that 
befell  him. 

Pulpits  are  everywhere  filled  with  a  bald-headed 
ministry,  and  the  shearers  are  being  kept  busy  to 
supply  the  demand.  A  few  pop  guns  loaded  with 
paper  wads  are  being  fired,  a  report  is  heard,  but 
no  one  is  hurt.  Some  who  have  had  the  power  like 
Samson,  have  had  their  eyes  put  out  and  now  go 
around  like  a  blind  horse  in  the  old  beaten  path  of  a 
treadmill;  they  are  forever  going  and  getting  no- 
where. My  father  used  a  blind  horse  in  the  bark  mill 
of  his  tannery.  The  animal  became  so  habituated  to 
the  mill,  that  instead  of  grazing,  when  turned  out  in 
the  green  pasture  near  by,  we  often  found  her  going 
around  and  around  in  a  circle,  at  the  same  gait  she 
was  accustomed  to  in  the  mill.  This  would  be  kept 
up  for  hours  unless  some  one  had  mercy  upon  her 


136  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

and  broke  the  spell.  Before  she  lost  her  sight  she 
was  a  valuable  race  horse.  The  sanctified  experience 
will  start  you  out  at  race  horse  speed  for  glory.  No 
more  circuitous  routes  or  beaten  paths.  Nothing 
less  than  the  baptism  of  the  Holy  Ghost  and  fire 
will  break  the  pulpit  treadmill  spell  of  to-day.  Poor 
old  blind  Samson. was  a  pitiful  sight,  bound  with 
fetters  of  brass  and  grinding  in  the  prison  house  of 
the  Philistines,  after  having  been  a  mighty  victor, 
single  handed,  over  their  armies.  As  we  see  him  in 
his  humiliation  at  the  mill,  we  think  of  the  trium- 
phant spirit  in  which  he  walked  away  with  the  gates 
of  the  city,  posts,  bar  and  all — carrying  them  to  the 
top  of  the  mountain. 

The  lords  of  the  Philistines  gathered  them- 
selves together  to  sacrifice  to  Dagon,  their  god,  for 
they  said,  "Our  god  hath  delivered  Samson,  our 
enemy,  into  our  hand."  They  had  now  in  their 
power  the  destroyer  of  their  ^country,  who  had  mul- 
tiplied their  slain.  When  their  hearts  were  merry 
they  called  for  Samson  out  of  the  prison  house  that 
he  might  make  them  sport.  The  shorn  prophets 
are  the  laughing  stock  of  devils  while  vultures  from 
the  pit  prey  upon  their  congregations.  Ever  and 
anon  there  is  a  jubilee  in  hell  over  one  who  has  had 
great  strength  but  who,  alas,  has  fallen  into  the 
hands  of  the  shearers.  If  these  poor  victims  would 
awaken  to  the  fact  that  their  strength  is  gone,  and 
let  their  locks  grow  again,  they  could  pull  down  the 
pillars  on  the  heads  of  the  Philistines,  and  like 
Samson,  accomplish  more  by  their  death  (of  the 
old  man)  than  by  their  life.  They  might  lose  their 


SHORN     SAMPSONS.  137 

ecclesiastical  standing,  but  they  would  regain  their 
strength,  and  be  a  terror  to  the  workers  of  iniquity. 
Some  are  courageous  enough  to  go  just  to  the  dan- 
ger point  and  no  further.  A  few  dare  to  be  true, 
suffering  the  reproach  of  Christ.  Jesus  said  to  His 
disciples  when  He  sent  them  forth,  "He  that  findeth 
his  life  shall  lose  it,  and  he  that  loseth  his  life  for 
my  sake  shall  find  it."  We  never  live  until  we  die, 
"For  he  that  is  dead  is  freed  from  sin."  "But  now 
being  made  free  from  sin,  and  become  servants  to 
God,  ye  have  your  fruit  unto  holiness  and  the  end 
everlasting  life."  (Rom.  6:7,  22.)  It  is  one 
thing  to  be  a  servant  of  human  organizations,  and 
another  to  be  a  servant  of  God.  An  organization 
is  human  when  man  has  taken  the  reins  out  of  the 
hands  of  God  and  set  himself  up  in  the  place  of  the 
Holy  Spirit's  wisdom  and  guidance.  King  Saul  did 
this.  Sorrow  and  ruin  attended  his  wild  and  selfish 
career,  that  at  last  brought  self-destruction.  To  be 
a  servant  of  Gocl  may  mean  to  be  dropped  from  the 
hands  of  a  bishop  to  the  bottom  of  the  ladder;  and 
as  these  human  structures  have  no  real  foundation 
under  them,  it  is  well  to  go  down  and  build  on  the 
rock  against  which  the  gates  of  hell  can  not  prevail. 
Never  mind  the  scoffs  and  jeers  or  sickly  smiles  of 
spectators  while  the  descent  is  being  made.  When 
the  bottom  has  been  reached  the  coming  up  will  be 
glorious.  It  was  so  with  Daniel,  who  was  cast  into 
the  lion's  den,  and  Joseph,  who  was  thrown  into  a 
pit  by  his  brethren,  came  out  with  his  face  toward 
a  throne.  • 


CHAPTER  XII. 

HEALING    FOR    THE    BODY REVIVAL    FIRES    ON    THE 

ERIE  CHARGE. 

Three  weeks  after  the  Lord  sanctified  me,  I  re- 
ceived faith  for  the  healing  of  my  body.  The  treat- 
ments received  from  the  best  physicians  with  their 
prescriptions  of  medicines,  change  of  climate,  scen- 
ery, and  study  of  music,  painting,  etc.,  were  carried 
out  with  but  little  profit.  My  wrecked  nervous  con- 
dition had  been  one  of  torture  almost  intolerable, 
baffling  medical  skill.  No  sooner  were  my  eyes 
closed  in  sleep  than  all  kinds  of  distorted  figures 
would  appear  before  me — hideous  reptiles  and  other 
creatures  with  human  heads  would  look  into  my 
face.  Beautiful  forms  would  vanish  and  reappear 
as  monstrosities.  If  I  had  not  been  as  well  as  usual 
during  the  day,  or  there  had  been  any  unusual  ex- 
citement, my  husband  would  often  sit  at  my  bedside 
to  awaken  me  out  of  these  horrible  nightmares  into 
which  I  was  sure  to  fall.  The  physician  once  said 
that  my  sleep  was  like  that  of  a  man  in  the  delirium 
trcmens.  Sometimes  a  knock  on  the  door  would 
throw  me  into  a  nervous  chill.  I  was  unable  to  hear 
pathetic  stories  of  poverty  or  suffering,  and  had  not 
been  able  to  attend  a  funeral  service  without  injury 
for  four  years.  When  awakening  at  night  there 
were  often  dark  clouds  hanging  over  me,  and  the 
only  way  that  relief  could  be  obtained  was  to  arouse 

138 


HEAUNG  FOR  THE  BODY.  139 

my  husband  to  talk  or  pray  with  me.  I  believed 
it  was  God's  will  to  heal  me,  and  I  promised  to  use 
all  my  strength  in  His  service  and  for  His  glory. 
I  knew  no  other  way  than  to  take  it  by  faith  as  I  had 
sanctification,  and  did  so.  I  felt  no  immediate 
change  but  was  conscious  that  He  was  undertaking 
for  me.  Several  days  of  severe  testing  followed, 
during  which  time  I  stood  on  the  promises  and  re- 
sisted the  devil.  In  looking  to  Jesus,  determining 
not  to  doubt,  the  neYvousness  all  left  me,  and  my 
sleep  became  as  sweet  as  that  of  a  child,  with  no 
more  frightful  dreams  or  night-mares.  My  friends 
could  all  see  that  a  great  change  had  taken  place  in 
my  body.  To  the  glory  of  God  I  can  say  that  I  was 
completely  healed  of  this  chronic  disease,  but  since 
then  I  have  had  my  faith  tried  quite  severely  by 
sickness  in  other  forms;  but  in  every  such  instance 
have  gotten  the  victory  by  faith.  "Many  are  the 
afflictions  of  the  righteous,  but  the  Lord  delivereth 
him  out  of  them  all."  (Psa.  34:19.) 

Four  years  ago  I  took  a  heavy  cold  in  a  tent 
meeting  at  Leadville.  For  three  months  I  suffered 
with  severe  pains  in  my  chest,  coughing  almost  con- 
stantly. Yet  I  went  on  with  my  work.  While  in 
Cripple  Creek  I  stepped  into  the  office  of  a  physician 
one  day  with  a  sister  who  was  taking  treatment. 
Before  leaving,  at  her  request.  I  had  my  lungs  ex- 
amined and  was  told  that  I  had  all  the  symptoms  of 
quick  consumption,  and  unless  the  disease  was 
checked  I  might  not  be  living  in  six  months.  In 
our  work  I  often  lead  the  open  air  meetings.  I  was 
told  this  would  have  to  stop  immediately  and  was 


140  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUL.AH. 

handed  a  prescription  for  cod  liver  oil,  and  told  to 
have  it  filled  at  the  first  drug  store.  While  I  slipped 
it  into  my  pocket  I  did  not  have  it  filled,  nor  had  I 
any  intention  of  doing  so. 

On  my  return  home  I  found  the  Mission  had 
suffered  in  my  absence.  I  went  to  the  service  the 
following  Sunday  night.  My  mother  came  in  a  few 
minutes  before  the  meeting.  She  looked  at  me  and 
said,  "You  might  just  as  well  close  this  Mission 
now  for  it  will  have  to  be  closed  sooner  or  later." 
I  thought  she  meant  it  would  close  on\  account  of 
my  health,  but  asked  her  no  questions.  At  that  mo- 
ment about  fifteen  men  filed  into  the  room  and  took 
their  seats  and  looked  up  at  me  with  such  a  sad  and 
pitiful  look — some  the  pictures  of  despair.  I  never 
had  a  greater  desire  to  live  than  I  had  at  that  mo- 
ment— not  for  myself,  but  that  I  might  preach  the 
gospel  to  just  such  persons  as  were  before  me.  [ 
knelt  down  and  began  to  pray  aloud.  I  do  not  know 
what  I  said,  but  I  know  the  Spirit  of  God  had  pos- 
session of  me.  A  quickening  came  into  my  body. 
1  arose  to  my  feet  and.  said  to  mother,  "He  has 
touched  me,"  and  without  further  preliminaries 
stepped  to  the  front  and  began  to  preach  under  a 
gracious  anointing  of  the  Spirit.  I  knew  I  had  a 
new  lease  of  life,  and  that  the  Mission  would  not 
close,  but  that  others  would  be  opened  up.  The 
pains  left  my  chest  and  the  coughing  ceased.  This 
was  Dec.  4th,  1898. 

Last  August  (1901)  I  had  consumption  of  the 
bowels.  A  physician  was  consulted.  I  told  him 
my  case  was  in  the  hands  of  the  Lord,  that  I  did 


ERIE;  CHARGE.  141 

not  want  treatment;  only  to  know  the  nature  of 
my  trouble.  He  said  he  was  not  a  Christian  but 
gave  an  instance,  when  he  was  in  distress,  of  a  re- 
markable inswer  to  his  prayer.  He  frankly  told 
me  that  even  had  I  desired  treatment  he  could  do 
nothing  for  me,  'aid  that  as  I  believed  in  prayer  I 
had  better  pray.  I  was  face  to  face  with  the  grave 
and  fully  realized  that  my  help  must  come  from 
God  alone.  Before  consulting-  the  physician,  through 
hours  of  severest  testings,  my  case  was  so  fully  in 
the  hands  of  the  Lord  that  I  had  not  an  anxious 
care,  rejoicing  that  I  was  His  for  life  or  death.  The 
Lord  had  raised  me  up  before  and  I  \vas  sure  that 
He  would  do  so  again  if  my  work  was  not  done. 
At  this  time  Mr.  White  wras  away  in  a  revival  meet- 
ing. I  suffered  severely  for  several  days  and  fainted 
and  fell  in  the  night,  wedging  myself  in  behind  the 
bath-tub,  where  I  might  have  perished  had  not  one 
of  the  sisters  heard  my  groans  and  come  to  my  re- 
lief. The  crisis  came  two  or  three  days  later,  when, 
after  a  few  hours  of  intense  pain,  Jesus,  the  great 
physician,  came  to  my  relief.  To  Him  be  all  the 
glory. 

For  eight  years  I  have  taken  no  remedies  and 
my  faith  and  trust  have  been  in  Jesus  alone  as  my 
physician. 

THE  ERIE  CHARGE. 

In  June,  1893,  the  conference  sent  us  to  Erie. 

Colo.     We  were  delayed  in  moving  almost  three 

weeks  because  of  the  former  pastor's  remaining-  to 

,  hold  a  church  supper  to  raise  some  of  his  back  sal- 


142  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

ary.  The  house  he  lived  in  was  not  a  parsonage, 
but  the  only  one  in  the  town  available  for  the  pur- 
pose. On  our  arrival  we  found  his  family  still  in 
the  house,  but  ready  to  go  the  next  clay.  The 
preacher's  wife  felt  it  her  duty  to  enlighten  us  in 
regard  to  some  things  about  the  work.  She  told 
us  of  a  certain  local  Methodist  preacher  who  called 
himself  the  "daddie  of  the  town."  He  was  the 
leading  church  official,  popular  as  a  politician  and 
the  organizer  of  most  of  the  lodges  in  the  town  and 
of  many  throughout  the  state.  She  said  he  would 
expect  to  hold  the  funeral  services  and  \vanted  all 
the  weddings.  She  advised  us  to  let  him  have  his 
way  in  things  to  avoid  trouble,  however  unjust  it 
might  be.  After  she  told  me  this  I  knew  there  would 
be  a  connection. 

Our  baby  was  just  recovering  from  the  whoop- 
ing-cough and  we  were  feeding  him  on  prepared 
foods.  The  change  of  water  did  not  agree  with  him, 
and  a  week  after  our  arrival  he  was  at  death's  door. 
On  July  i Qth  he  had  rallied  sufficiently  to  be  taken 
to  Glen  Park,  in  the  mountains,  and  after  we  had 
been  there  a  week  his  life  was  again  despaired  of. 
The  doctor  left  us  one  night  about  half  past  two 
o'clock  without  any  hopes  of  his  recovery.  Xo  one 
but  God  knew  our  hearts  as  we  watched  the  little 
sufferer. 

As  he  had  been  so  miraculously  raised  up  be- 
fore. I  could  not  help  but  think  that  he  would  be 
spared  now.  I  believed  there  was  a  lesson  in  it  for 
me,  and  I  asked  the  Lord  to  let  me  learn  it  quickly, 
when  mv  soul  was  instantly  hushed  bv  the  voice  of 


ERIE    CHARGE.  143 

the  spirit  saying,  "Will  you  go  and  preach  the  gos- 
pel if  his  life  is  spared?"  My  answer  was,  "Yes 
Lord."  I  felt  sure  that  He  would  not  require  me 
to  go  unless  I  was  perfectly  satisfied  that  the  chil- 
dren would  have  the  proper  care  in  my  absence.  The 
next  morning  the  baby  was  much  better,  and  mes- 
sages for  the  people  began  to  burn  in  my  soul. 

My  husband  returned  to  his  charge  and  for 
nearly  four  weeks  T  was  left  alone  \vith  the  two  chil- 
dren. It  would  have  been  impossible  to  have  taken 
this  responsibility  before  the  Lord  sanctified  my 
soul.  There  were  several  critical  times  passed  and 
some  severe  tests  before  we  returnd  home,  but 
through  them  all  ]  had  -complete  victory. 

At  our  first  prayer  meeting  after  my  return  the 
local  preacher  was  present  and  took  a  prominent 
part.  The  opportunity  was  given  for  testimony.  I 
could  think  of  nothing  but,  "Woe  unto  you  when 
all  men  shall  speak  well  of  you,  for  so  did  your  fath- 
ers to  the  false  prophets."  (Luke  6:26.)  I  had 
no  thought  of  the  preacher  when  I  quoted  the  pass- 
age; but  it  was  an  arrow  directed  by  the  Holy 
Spirit,  for  he  took  it  all  to  himself.  The  Lord  kept 
his  hand  upon  me;  and  at  every  service  I  attended, 
without  wishing  to  antagonize  him,  it  seemed  I 
would  and  that  it  could  not  be  avoided.  The  situa- 
tion became  more  and  more  interesting  until  he  open- 
ly rebelled. 

The  services  of  Rev.  Thomas  Leach  and  his 
singer  were  secured  for  evangelistic  work.  The 
two-edged  sword  of  full  salvation  was  used  and  the 
church  and  town  stirred  as  they  never  had  been. 


144  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

He  was  the  first  person  I  ever  knew  to  make  an 
altar  call  for  seekers  of  both  pardon  and  purity. 
1  was  anticipating  a  spiritual  feast  before  these 
brethren  came,  but  two  days  after  their  arrival  our 
baby  took  another  relapse  and  was  again  given  up 
by  the  physician,  who  left  the  house  and  reported 
him  to  be  dying.  My  husband  retired  to  some  se- 
cret place  to  pour  out  his  soul  to  God  while  I  was 
left  alone  by  his  side.  Feeling  that  the  Lord  had 
something  to  say  to  me,  my  heart  cried,  "Speak  for 
Thy  servant  heareth."  Then  came  the  words  clear 
and  unmistakable,  "If  his  life  is  spared,  will  you 
preach  the  gospel?"  It  was  the  same  question  that 
was  asked  two  months  before,  but  after  his  recovery 
I  doubted  whether  it  was  the  Lord,  saying  "Surely 
He  did  not  give  me  these  children  to  leave  in  an- 
other's care."  I  was  willing  to  help  all  I  could  in 
the  services  at  home,  but  was  in  hopes  the  Lord 
would  not  ask  me  to  go  where  it  would  take  me  from 
the  children.  The  second  test  was  sufficient  to  re- 
move all  doubt  and  my  soul  said  yes  once  more  to 
God.  At  this  moment  my  husband  came  in  and  for 
the  first  time  during  all  the  baby's  illness  he  was 
resigned  to  his  death.  It  was  Sunday  morning 
and  the  evangelist  told  the  people  that  in  all  prob- 
ability the  child  would  not  be  living  at  the  close  of 
the  service.  Many  persons  came  to  the  house  during 
the  afternoon  and  were  surprised  to  find  him  still 
alive,  and  changing  some  for  the  better. 

THE  PLEASANT  VIEW   MEETING. 

A  few  weeks  later  special  services  were  begun 


PLEASANT    VIEW    MEETING.  145 

at  Pleasant  View,  a  little  country  church  on  this 
charge  five  miles  from  town. 

The  baby  was  still  very  delicate  and  required 
constant  care.  I  was  seeking  every  opportunity  to 
study  God's  word,  which  was  opening  with  new 
light.  I  found  holiness  everywhere  on  its  pages  and 
longed  to  preach  it  to  the  people.  I  believed  it  was 
God's  will  for  me  to  help  in  the  meetings  just  start- 
ed, but  did  not  know  how  to  leave  the  child.  One 
day  it  came  to  me  that  he  could  be  left  with  my 
niece,  if  he  would  only  sleep  while  we  were  away. 
That  evening  he  went  to  sleep  at  half  past  six  o'clock 
and  did  not  awaken  until  eleven.  The  next  evening 
this  was  repeated  and  I  saw  that  God's  hand  was  in 
it  and  ventured  to  go.  For  four  weeks  he  slept 
through  the  hours  of  our  absence.  My  husband 
preached  the  first  few  evenings,  but  there  were  no 
seekers.  The  burden  of  my  heart  was  to  see  be- 
lievers sanctified.  After  he  had  preached  rather 
lengthily  one  night,  unable  to  sit  still  longer,  I  asked 
if  I  might  speak  for  a  few  moments.  My  lips  were 
touched  with  a  live  coal  and  in  a  short  time  thirteen 
persons  bowed  at  the  altar  for  sanctification,  and  five 
soon  followed  for  pardon.  The  power  of  God  was 
manifested  in  the  deliverance  of  souls  from  their 
bondage.  After  the  service  the  pastor  was  very 
much  depressed.  He  said  he  was  afraid  the  scrip- 
tures I  used  had  been  strained  to  bring  out  the  sec- 
ond work  of  grace.  This  was  an  unexpected  trial  to 
me.  I  sought  consolation  from  a  young  Salvation 
Army  brother  who  was  riding  with  us,  when  to  my 
surprise  he  decided  against  me.  This  made  it  much 


146  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

harder  for  me,  as  I  had  great  confidence  in  the  broth- 
er's experience.  He  claimed  to  be  sanctified,  and  I 
believed  he  was.  It  was  the  best  thing  for  me  in 
the  end,  as  I  learned  not  to  look  for  the  approval  of 
men  after  the  Holy  Spirit  had  given  the  message. 
Having  been  in  the  experience  only  a  short  time,  I 
had  yet  to  learn  that  silence  was  my  greatest  weapon 
and  the  Spirit  was  being  grieved  by  my  trying  to 
defend  myself  and  the  word. 

Arriving  at  the  church  the  next  evening,  I 
was  met  at  the  gate  by  a  brother  who  was  waiting 
to  give  me  some  advice.  He  had  been  visiting 
through  the  neighborhood  during  the  day  and  found 
some  persons  who  attended  the  service  the  night 
before  greatly  stirred  over  the  preaching  of  holiness. 
He  believed  in  holiness,  but  thought  it  was  not  the 
time  to  preach  it.  The  words  had  no  sooner  fallen 
from  his  lips  than  I  detected  the  cloven  hoof  of  the 
enemy.  Satan  had  come  as  an  angel  of  light  to  de- 
feat the  preaching  of  a  whole  gospel.  I  saw  it  clear- 
ly, and  it  only  made  me  more  determined  to  de- 
clare the  whole  counsel  of  God  regardless  of  con- 
sequences. 

There  was  great  power  in  the  meetings.  A 
man  converted  Saturday  evening  shouted  until  he 
was  so  hoarse  that  he  could  not  speak  above  a 
whisper  for  three  days.  His  whole  family  was 
brought  to  Christ.  His  father  was  converted  un- 
der Peter  Cartwright  and  truly  we  were  seeing 
the  old  time  religion. 

Persons  who  were  converted  at  the  beginnning 
of  the  meeting  were  sanctified  before  its  close.  Con- 


VIEW    MEETING.  147 

viction  was  so  great  it  was  almost  impossible  to  get 
the  people  to  leave  the  church  at  night  after  the  serv- 
ice closed.  The  news  of  the  revival  spread  all  over 
the  northern  part  of  the  state.  Some  persons  who 
were  not  able  to  attend  were  converted  in  their 
homes.  Restitutions  were  made  and  family  altars 
established.  This  community  until  of  late  has  been 
a  holiness  center. 

BROTHER  R.  A.  CALKINS'  TESTIMONY. 

"When  twenty  years  old  I  joined  the  church  at 
Marshall,  Wisconsin,  and  without  any  change  of 
heart  the  preacher  told  me  I  was  all  right.  Soon 
after  I  moved  to  Kansas.  Wishing  to  unite  with 
God's  people  there  I  received  a  very  flattering  let- 
ter from  my  former  church  pastor. 

"Subsequently  I  moved  to  Colorado  and  rinding 
no  church  near  enough  with  which  to  unite  I  carried 
my  letter  in  my  pocket  and  trunk  until  it  was  worn 
out.  I  married  after  coming  West  and  my  wife  and 
others  supposed  I  was  a  backslider.  A  revival  meet- 
ing was  held  a  number  of  years  ago  at  this  place,  at 
which  she  was  converted.  One  day  on  returning 
home  she  came  out  and  embraced  me,  telling  me  it 
had  been  the  happiest  day  of  her  life.  This  so  con- 
victed me  that  I  was  awakened  to  the  fact  that  I  had 
never  been  converted  myself,  although  I  had  been  a 
respectable  church  member  for  sixteen  years.  I  be- 
lieve now  that  one  can  be  a  respectable  member  of 
any  denomination,  meet  the  obligations  placed  on 
him  and  go  straight  to  hell.  I  had  willingly  carried 
the  financial  burdens  of  the  church  and  often  prayed 


148  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

and  testified  in  class  meeting,  the  substance  of  my  re- 
marks being  that  I  did  not  have  as  much  of  the  love 
of  God  in  my  heart  as  1  wanted,  but  I  hoped  to  meet 
them  all  in  heaven. 

"A  few  days  after  my  wife's  conversion  I,  too, 
j:ec£iyjed_jhe_wj^aiejs_^jt^  Spirit  to  the  pardon  of 
my  sins.  I  lived  in  the  up  and  down  experience  for 
several  years,  often  times  feeling  under  condemna- 
tion and  then  repenting  and  praying  until  peace  was 
restored.  I  knew  there  was  something  lacking,  but 
did  not  understand  the  doctrine  of  holiness,  there- 
fore remained  in  the  twilight  experience.  The 
above  meeting  at  Pleasant  View  found  me  in  an  un- 
settled condition  praying  for  a  better  experience. 
Night  after  night  I  went  to  the  altar  not  for  pardon 
but  for  purity.  As  the  Holy  Spirit  revealed  inher- 
ited corruption  I  sickened  at  the  sight  of  my  own 
heart.  On  the  eighth  night,  after  the  hardest  strug- 
gle of  my  life,  when  the  altar  call  was  made  they 
were  singing,  "Standing  on  the  promises  of  God." 
The  enemy  whispered,  "Are  you  going  to  make  a 
fool  of  yourself  by  going  up  there  again?"  At  that 
moment  the  burden  rolled  away  and  wave  after  wave 
of  glory  deluged  my  soul.  My  friends  heard  it 
miles  away.  Some  of  them  had  supposed  I  had  all 
the  salvation  there  was  for  me." 

This  brother's  face  glowed  as  his  heart  burst 
forth  from  day  to  day  in  holy  laughter.  At  times 
it  seemed  that  the  earthen  vessel  would  break  if 
the  hand  of  God  was  not  stayed. 

I  had  been  sustained  for  weeks  by  supernatural 
strength,  attending  our  sick  baby  and  household  du- 


PLEASANT    VIEW    MEETING.  149 

ties  during  the  day  and  driving-  five  miles  to  the 
church  and  back  of  nights,  often  continuing  the  ser- 
vices until  ten  and  eleven  o'clock.  The  night's  rest 
was  continually  broken  by  the  care  of  the  baby, 
but  almost  invariably  the  Holy  Spirit  would  awaken 
me  at  five  o'clock  with  a  burden  for  souls.  I  would 
pray  until  six,  sometimes  receiving  the  evidence  that 
certain  persons  would  be  converted  the  following 
evening.  I  suffered  from  the  continual  exposure 
and  when  the  meeting  closed,  had  a  severe  cold  on 
my  lungs.  I  did  not  feel  sick,  but  was  greatly 
in  need  of  rest,  and  the  only  way  to  get  it  was  to 
go  to  bed.  I  did  this  and  stayed  there  for  ten  days. 
During  this  time  the  Lord  was  wonderfully  precious 
to  my  soul.  The  baby  had  the  best  of  care  and  was 
improving  fast  in  the  hands  of  a  young  woman  who 
had  been  converted  in  our  meetings.  One  day,  I 
do  not  remember  whether  I  was  dozing  or  not,  I  had 
a  vision  of  hell.  It  was  terrible  beyond  words  to 
tell.  I  saw  it  as  a  pit  and  standing  close  enough 
I  looked  over  into  it.  I  could  see  miles  and  miles 
into  its  awful  depths.  The  mouth  of  it  was  an  en- 
closure of  four  black  walls.  In  this  narrow  passage 
demons  wrere  pressing  their  way  out  and  in.  Those 
just  entering  hacj  victims  in  their  embrace  screaming 
with  horror.  One  great  black  monster  had  my 
mother,  another  equally  as  ferocious  was  carrying 
my  oldest  brother,  who  was  then  unsaved  in  Mon- 
tana. I  had  been  concerned  for  four  weeks  about 
my  mother's  salvation,  knowing  that  she  was  not  in 
a  safe  place  spiritually.  I  had  been  writing  letters 
to  her,  which  I  am  sure  were  used  of  the  Lord  in 


I5O  BOOKING  BACK  FROM 

bringing  her  closer  to  Himself.  Before  many  months 
the  Lord  brought  her  to  Colorado,  where  she  re- 
ceived great  help  and  light  at  our  first  holiness  camp 
meeting.  Three  months  later  my  brother  Emery 
was  saved  in  Montana. 

ACHAN  IN  THE  CAMP. 

One  Saturday  morning  while  reading  the  story 
of  Achan  a  burden  was  rolled  upon  me  for  the  Sun- 
day services.  I  saw  him  who  caused  the  defeat  of 
Israel's  army  as  a  type  of  the  "old  man"  of  sin.  The 
Lord  was  burning  a  message  into  my  soul  and  pre- 
paring the  way  for  me  to  deliver  it.  I  thought  of  no 
particular  person  as  Achan  in  the  camp,  but  could 
see  clearly  that  the  man  of  sin  must  die  before  we 
could  expect  victory.  I  said  nothing  to  my  husband 
about  my  leadings  until  he  called  me  to  the  study 
and  told  me  that  he  had  no  message  for  the  morn- 
ing congregation.  I  told  him  I  understood  why.  He 
took  the  hint.  On  the  way  to  the  church  my  body 
was  weak  under  the  pressure  of  the  Spirit.  I  knew 
gospel  dynamite  was  going  to  explode  before  that 
service  closed.  My  husband  asked  me  to  tell  him  my 
subject,  but  the  Lord  made  me  withhold  it  until  the 
time.  I  could  see  divine  wisdom  in. this  afterwards, 
as  he  would  have  thought  of  the  local  preacher,  and 
would  have  been  afraid  that  the  message  would  be 
too  personal.  As  I  stepped  out  on  the  floor  to  speak 
my  limbs  fairly  smote  together,  so  great  was  the 
power  of  the  Spirit  upon  me.  The  battle  was  or- 
dered of  the  Lord,  and  for  about  thirty  minutes  shot 
and  shell  fell  thick  and  fast  in  the  ranks  of  the  enemy. 


ACHAN    IN    THE     CAMP. 


There  were  tears  of  repentance  and  storm  clouds  of 
wrath,  the  latter  especially  upon  the  face  of  the  local 
preacher,  who  arose  to  his  feet  and  began  to  justify 
himself  and  to  antagonize  the  pastor  who  had  fol- 
lowed with  an  exhortation.  He  took  all  that  was 
said  to  himself,  and  kept  the  floor  until  he  had  made 
his  defense,  then  evidently  expecting  a  reply  he  re- 
turned to  his  seat.  People  were  called  forward  for 
prayers.  A  miner,  under  conviction  for  several  days, 
broke  down  and  came  to  the  altar.  He  was  used  of 
the  Lord  to  minister  an  awful  rebuke  to  this  brother. 
As  he  came  to  the  front  he  stopped  at  the  head  of 
the  aisle  where  the  local  preacher  sat  in  a  chair  facing 
the  congregation.  He  put  his  hand  on  his  shoulder 
and  pushing  him  back  said,  with  tears  and  trembling, 
"Man,  do  you  know  what  you  are  doing?  You  are 
fighting  against  God.  He  is  with  these  people.  I 
am  a  sinner."  Then  in  a  few  words  he  gave  this 
brother  an  epitome  of  his  life  in  the  town,  and  in 
it  said:  "Instead  of  helping  people  to  Christ,  you 
have  darkened  their  lives,"  making  mention  espe- 
cially of  a  young  man  then  lying  in  the  graveyard 
on  the  hill.  "You  have  been  given  to  story  telling 
too  low  for  the  houses  of  ill  fame  on  Market  street 
in  Denver."  It  is  a  fearful  thing  to  fall  into  the 
hands  of  the  living  God.  His  rebukes  are  some- 
times terrible,  making  man's  beauty  to  consume 
away.  The  audience  sat  motionless  and  speechless 
while  the  sword  of  truth  uncovered  sin. 

I  made  some  reference  to  lodges  which  aroused 
the  beast  of  depravity.  Ephraim  was  joined  to  his 
idols  and  wished  to  be  let  alone.  The  crv  that 


152  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

went  up  in  behalf  of  these  ungodly  organizations 
during  the  next  few  weeks  doubtless  had  a  striking 
similarity  to  the  uproar  at  Ephesus,  when  the  idol- 
atry of  that  city  was  made  manifest  under  the 
preaching  of  Paul  and  his  co-laborers.  About 
twelve  humble  disciples  had  received  the  Holy 
Ghost  subsequent  to  their  conversion  and  shook  the 
foundations  of  the  heathen  city.  In  much  confusion 
the  idolators  cried  out,  "Great  is  Diana  of  the  Ephe- 
sians,"  until  the  town  clerk  appeased  their  wrath 
by  telling  them  that  they  were  in  danger  of  being 
called  into  account  by  the  authorities  for  the  uproar. 
There  was  almost  everything  in  the  order  of  lodges 
represented  in  this  town  of  Erie. 

Special  services  were  began.  Unusual  inter- 
est was  taken  by  the  unsaved  and  non-churchgoing 
people,  while  the  attendance  of  the  membership  was 
very  small.  The  women  as  well  as  the  men  were 
more  interested  in  their  lodges  than  in  salvation, 
and  excused  their  absence  by  saying  that  they  had  to 
attend  the  lodge.  Although  a  small  place  it  kept  the 
local  preacher  and  his  lodge  folks  busy  attending 
funerals.  They  came  out  on  dress  parade  and  made 
a  great  ado,  especially  at  the  grave,  where  they  re- 
minded me  of  the  Bannock  Indians  in  their  orgies 
over  their  dead. 

A  committee  waited  on  the  presiding  elder  to 
ask  for  our  removal.  A  few  days  later  he  called  and 
severely  reprimanded  me  for  saying  anything  against 
lodges,  giving  us  to  understand  that  he  was  a  Free 
Mason  himself.  I  told  him  that  my  father  had  been 
too,  but  dropped  the  lodge  after  his  conversion. 


ERIE)  CHARGE.  153 

There  was  a  sting  in  his  reply  when  he  said  that  he 
was  a  Christian  and  he  had  not  dropped  his  lodge 
either,  adding  that  a  person  could  not  be  a  Free 
Mason  unless  he  was  a  believer.  This  we  doubted. 

Philip  Zang,  the  great  Colorado  brewer,  be- 
longed  to  thisTofcter.  His  beer  cursed  the  lives  of 
thousands  and  took  the  bread  from  the  mouths  of 
poor  women  and  innocent  children.  Yet  this  man, 
the  papers  said,  had  the  greatest  funeral  ever  wit- 
nessed in  the  history  of  the  city;  a  thousand  dollar 
aluminum  casket  was  used  with  three  thousand  dol- 
lars in  flowers,  woven  into  magnificent  designs  of 
which  they  made  special  mention  of  Crosses,  Gates 
Ajar  and  Anchors.  The  bands  played  the  delicate 
strains  of  a  funeral  march  at  the  head  of  a  cortege  of 

double  carriages  over  a  mile  long.  To  Rev. was 

extended  the  courtesy  of  a  few  remarks  in  which  he 
said :  "The  deeds  of  Mr.  Zang  are  a  sufficient  mon- 
ument to  his  memory."  But  the  men  who  were 
especially  set  up  as  the  principal  actors  on  the  occa- 
sion, performing  the  funeral  rites,  were  of  the  be- 
fore-named order.  They  laid  away  the  man  whose 
name  is  on  a  sign  at  almost  every  door  of  the  hells 
of  suicide  and  debauchery  in  the  West.  If  our  pre- 
siding elder  considers  this  lodge  a  good  thing,  then 
he  should  have  considered  himself  highly  honored 
in  this  procession  as  a  pall-bearer.  Reader,  how  did 
some  of  our  pastors  and  bishops  look  in  mourning 
for  their  deceased  brother?  Must  one  be  a  believer 
to  be  a  Free  Mason  ?  So  devils  believe  and  tremble. 

Persecutions  were  coming  thick  and  fast.  I 
felt  I  could  face  a  regiment  of  demons  if  my  hus- 


154  BOOKING  BACK  FROM 

band  would  only  stand  with  me,  but  he  was  not  in 
the  full  light  and  could  not  see  things  as  I  did.  My 
burden  for  him  and  my  brother  Charles,  who  were 
both  preaching  without  this  experience,  was  almost 
crushing  me. 

The  meetings  continued  with  good  results,  not- 
withstanding the  difficulties  in  the  way.  The  desire 
to  see  my  husband  sanctified  eclipsed  every  other  in- 
terest. My  tears  would  flow  in  spite  of  restraining 
efforts  when  I  would  think  of  what  might  be  accom- 
plished if  he  were  sanctified  wholly.  At  times  he 
became  troubled  and  asked  me  why  I  wept.  I  shrank 
from  telling  him,  knowing  the  controversy  that 
would  follow,  but  unable  to  avoid  the  question 
longer  my  heart  was  unburdened  one  Sunday  morn- 
ing as  he  was  standing  in  the  door  with  his  Bible 
under  his  arm  just  ready  to  start  for  the  church. 
To  my  surprise  he  made  no  reply  and  walked  off. 
I  saw  that  God  had  taken  hold  of  him. 

The  majority  of  the  church  members  had  but 
little  use  for  me  but  thought  he  was  about  right  and 
often  remarked  that  they  believed  in  the  kind  of 
sanctification  that  he  had.  On  entering  the  pulpit 
that  morning  he  confessed  publicly  that  he  was  not 
sanctified.  The  Lord  -honored  the  confession  and 
used  it  to  stir  the  people.  For  hours  I  waited  upon 
Gor1  in  fasting  and  prayer  for  his  sanctification  and 
received  the  assurance  that  something  would  be  done 
soon.  He  writes  of  his  experience  that  came  shortly 
after  this : 

"I  arose  one  Sunday  morning  with  such  a  sense 
of  unworthiness  that  I  cried  out  in  prayer,  wishing 


ERIE   CHARGE.  155 

that  I  might  be  put  away  in  the  Rock  of  Ages  and 
covered  up  out  of  sight.  I  went  to  the  church  at 
eleven  o'clock;  Brother  Harvey  Calkins  was  holding 
evangelistic  meetings  for  us.  After  the  opening  ex- 
ercises I  took  a  seat  in  the  congregation,  with  that 
humble,  unworthy  feeling  that  would  have  hidden 
me  away  in  the  lowliest  vale  or  place  accessible.  At 
the  close  of  the  sermon  the  evangelist  called  people 
forward.  I  knew  it  was  my  duty  to  go  to  the  front, 
and  went  up  and  kneeled  behind  the  pulpit  to  be 
hidden  from  view.  Suddenly  the  Spirit  came  in 
power  upon  me  and  a  shout  arose  from  the  depth 
of  my  being  that  I  knew,  when  it  reached  my  vocal 
cords,  that  if  God  had  His  way  with  me,  I  would 
shout  at  the  top  of  my  voice.  I  had  told  my  wife  I 
would  never  shout,  that  it  was  not  my  nature.  Sa- 
tan said,  if  you  do  you  will  make  a  fool  of  yourself 
and  that  nice  man  and  woman  in  the  back  part  of 
the  church,  whose  friendship  you  prize,  will  never 
have  anything  more  to  do  with  you.  I  said,  I  have 
conferred  with  flesh  and  blood  long  enough — these 
thoughts  were  quicker  than  a  flash,  when  yielding 
myself  up  to  God,  a  mighty  shout  of  "Glory  to  God ! 
Glory  to  God !"  broke  forth  from  my  lips.  Then,  a 
quiet,  sweet  peace  settled  down  on  my  soul  and 
the  Spirit  said,  "stand  up."  I  arose  and  looked  over 
the  congregation  and  instead  of  seeing  any  mani- 
fest displeasure,  the  people  were  weeping  under  the 
mighty  presence  of  God  and  the  man  and  woman, 
I  was  tempted  over,  were  coming  to  the  altar.  Again 
the  Spirit  distinctly  spoke  to  me,  saying,  "May  I 
not  with  a  shout  save  some  one  when  everything 


156  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

else  has  failed?"  I  said,  "Yes,  Lord."  Years  be- 
fore when  seeking  sanctification  I  was  similarly 
tested  and  yielded  to  the  tempter.  Later,  I  received 
the  experience  and  let  it  be  absorbed  by  the  world. 
Now  God  took  me  over  the  same  grounds  which, 
with  the  witness  of  the  Spirit,  was  full  proof  to  me 
that  God  had  sanctified  my  soul.  Glory  to  God !  In 
the  next  few  months  I  shouted  several  times  under  a 
similar  pressure  until  I  was  free  to  shout  or  not  to. 
God  wonderfully  bore  with  me  in  my  unworthiness 
and  infirmities  and  graciously  poured  out  His  Spirit 
upon  me  in  the  pulpit.  When  we  came  to  Denver  I 
murmured  and  complained  some  over  the  life  of  faith 
and  the  apparent  hardness  and  uncertainty  of  the 
work.  I  soon  learned  better,  and  God  marvelously 
provided  for  our  needs.  He  has  taken  me  through 
some  severe  refinings  and  given  me  some  of  the 
deepest  lessons  on  the  crucifixion  and  death  of  the 
old  self.  With  humiliation  and  tears  I  confess  to  a 
weakness  at  times  past  of  grieving  the  gentle  blessed 
Holy  Spirit  that  is  so  precious  in  His  ministrations, 
that  finally  led  to  an  experience  some  months  ago 
that  had  in  it  the  most  hopeless  soul  appalling  dark- 
ness that  could  be  described.  In  infinite  mercy  I  was 
delivered  from  it,  and  to-day  I  rejoice  in  the  blood 
that  cleanseth  from  all  sin,  and,  as  did  Hezekiah,  like 
the  waters  of  Shiloah,  'I  shall  go  softly  all  my 
years.' "  KENT  WHITE. 

I  had  been  almost  as  much  burdened  for  my 
brother  Charles  as  I  had  for  Mr.  White.  He  came 
to  visit  us,  and  the  Spirit  came  mightily  upon  me 
one  night  at  the  family  altar  in  prayer.  Hastening 


ERIE  CHARGE.  157 

from  the  room  he  called  to  me  from  the  head  of  the 
stairs  to  tell  me  that  he  was  afraid  I  was  beside 
myself.  I  had  joy  in  knowing  that  the  Holy  Spirit 
had  directed  an  arrow  that  he  was  unable  to  remove 
from  his  heart.  After  he  returned  to  his  charge  he 
wrote  me  that  peace  had  come  t^  his  soul.  Years 
of  experience  have  taught  me  that  persons  who  are 
really  justified  will  not  fight  the  "second  blessing." 
We  have  known  some  persons  at  the  beginning  of  a 
revival  meeting,  whom  we  believed  to  be  truly  jus- 
tified, who  refused  to  walk  in  the  light  in  making  the 
consecration  necessary  to  obtaining  the  blessing  and 
thereby  forfeited  what  they  had. 

Three  months  later  my  brother  was  sanctified 
at  our  first  holiness  camp  meeting,  but  he  relapsed 
into  ecclesiastical  bondage  and  lost  the  blessing. 

""More  than  one  hundred  and  fifty  souls  pro- 
fessed conversion  during  the  last  few  months  of  the 
Conference  year,  which  closed  with  the  finances  all 
in  good  condition,  yet  there  had  been  no  entertain- 
ments or  other  questionable  means  of  raising  money. 
The  blessing  of  God  had  been  upon  the  work  from 
the  beginning  of  the  year  and  streams  of  living  water 
flowed  out  to  the  people. 

Many  persons  grasped  our  hands  with  a  "God 
bless  you"  in  expressing  their  gratitude  for  the 
humble  instrumentality  used  in  the  salvation  of  their 
souls.  The  revival  reached  Lafayette  and  other  min- 
ing towns  near  by  and  several  school  districts. 


CHAPTER  XIII. 

THE  BOULDER  CONFERENCE — IN  EVANGELISTIC  WORK 
BIBLE  SUBJECTS  AND  COMMENTS. 

A  committee  was  sent  to  the  Conference  to 
make  sure  of  our  removal.  I  had  awakened  to  the 
fact  that  the  Methodists  were  a  fallen  people,  yet  I 
did  not  fully  comprehend  the  situation  until  the 
power  of  evil  that  dominated  this  body  was  made 
manifest.  They  showed  their  disapproval  of  the 
year's  work,  and  of  the  revival  that  was  so  far- 
reaching,  by  severely  criticising  the  work  that  had 
been  accomplished  and  by  granting  the  request  of  the 
committee  for  our  removal. 

Regardless  of  their  antagonism  to  holiness,  I 
determined  to  give  no  uncertain  sound  in  testifying 
at  the  love  feast  on  Sunday  morning.  The  bishop 
had  heard  of  me  in  the  cabinet  and  was  watching  me 
Very  closely.  They  reported  me  to  him  as  making 
a  hobby  of  holiness,  which  they  seemed  to  think  was 
a  fearful  thing  to  do.  Nine  years  have  passed,  and 
as  my  experience  widens  and  deepens,  the  subject 
becomes  more  and  more  precious. 

Before  the  day  was  over  many  questions  were 
asked  by  persons  who  were  lamenting  their  spiritual 
poverty  and  the  fact  that  their  pastors  did  not  preach 
holiness.  One  sister  said  that  she  had  heard  of  it 
years  before  in  the  east,  and  knew  it  was  just  what 

158 


BOUNDER  CONFERENCE.  159 

she  needed,  but  did  not  know  how  to  obtain  it.  A 
preacher  became  especially  interested  in  the  subject. 
He  had  been  sanctified  years  before,  but  through  dis- 
obedience lost  it.  Strange  to  say  this  was  the 
preacher  God  was  preparing  to  follow  us  upon  the 
Erie  charge. 

When  the  appointments  were  read  we  were  to 
go  to  Broomfield  circuit,  a  charge  consisting  of  two 
country  school  houses  with  no  parsonage.  Previous 
to  this,  it  had  been  supplied  by  students  from  the 
University  of  Denver.  This  was  perhaps  my  great- 
est test  since  the  Lord  had  sanctified  me,  as  I  had 
tried  hard  to  look  at  things  from  the  standpoint  of 
right  instead  of  from  human  prejudices  and  eccle- 
siastical corruption.  My  husband  said  from  the  be- 
ginning that  we  would  lose  our  standing  in  the  Con- 
ference if  we  worked  on  definite  holiness  lines. 

There  was  nothing  like  a  living  in  sight,  but  it 
was  not  that  I  was  afraid  of  coming  to  want,  for  I 
had  proved  God  and  founcf  that  His  promises  are 
true.  From  a  human  standpoint  it  was  somewhat 
humiliating  in  the  eyes  of  the  people,  especially  when 
our  enemies  were  apparently  triumphant,  but  I  had 
died  to  them  and  was  not  particularly  concerned 
about  what  they  thought  or  said.  The  fact  that  my 
work  seemed  to  be  cut  off  gave  me  the  greatest  con- 
cern. There  was  a  great  lesson  which  an  overruling 
providence  had  for  me,  which  perhaps  could  not 
have  been  learned  in  any  other  way,  i.  e.,  a  knowl- 
edge of  the'  apostate  condition  of  Methodism. 

I  found  that  the  old  church  which  I  had  loved 
so  long,  and  which  was  raised  up  to  spread  Scrip- 


l6o  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUIvAH. 

tural  holiness,  was  no  longer  a  healthy  branch  of 
the  true  vine,  but  had  become  withered  and  sapless, 
the  habitation  of  unclean  birds.  To  be  sure  there 
were  sickly  signs  of  life  in  some  parts  of  it,  but  a 
deathly  burning  blight  is  fast  consuming  the  whole. 
My  eyes  were  opened  to  many  things  since  the  great 
change  had  taken  place  in  my  heart,  but  this  exper- 
ience was  necessary  to  reveal  the  truth  in  its  fullest 
sense,  and  was  the  means  of  driving  the  last  nails 
of  death  to  the  fallen  church.  My  husband  tried  to 
comfort  me,  and  took  me  out  to  see  Brother  Calkin's 
family  in  the  country,  thinking  perhaps  they  might 
be  able  to  cheer  me  up.  They  were  powerless,  how- 
ever, to  relieve  the  death  pangs  of  my  soul,  for  I 
was  slowly  but  surely  dying.  The  end  was  reached 
the  next  day  about  noon  when  the  greatest  and  most 
unspeakable  joy  filled  my  soul.  I  was  suddenly 
lifted  from  the  low  lands  to  a  mountain  peak  in 
Beulah,  higher  than  any  yet  ascended.  The  cord 
that  bound  me  to  the  old  mortified  mother  was 
clipped  and  I  was  free.  It  was  liberty  beyond  all 
words  to  express. 

"My  soul  mounted  higher  in  a  chariot  of  fire, 

Nor  did  envy  Elijah  his  seat." 

I  knew  not  what  the  future  would  be,  but  one 
thing  had  been  learned,  that  these  great  organizations 
with  their  millions  of  money  and  members,  we  could 
only  use  as  mission  fields,  and  in  carrying  the  cup  of 
salvation  to  them  we  must  not  fail  to  declare  the 
whole  counsel  of  God,  keeping  clear  of  the  corrup- 
tion in  them  lest  we  also  be  consumed.  Nothing 
less  than  the  baptism  with  the  Holy  Ghost  and  fire 


BOULDER  CONFERENCE.  l6l 

will  keep  one  from  being  contaminated.  If  you  are  a 
flame  of  fire  every  unclean  thing  that  touches  you 
will  be  burned  up.  If_you  have  the  Pentecostal  bap- 
tism, they  will  separate  you  Irom  their  company  and 
casFoUt  your  name  as  evil. 

Some  people  are  strong  enough  to  come  in  con- 
tact with  the  most  malignant  form  of  contagious 
diseases,  while  others  dare  not  run  such  risks.  The 
Pentecostal  baptism  will  free  you  from  contagion 
and  nothing  short  of  it  will  lift  you  above  the  dan- 
ger line. 

There  is  a  sort  of  worldty  insanity  developed 
in  these  denominations  that  reminds  me  of  an  in- 
sane mother  I  once  knew,  who  stripped  her  two 
weeks'  old  babe  and  put  it  in  a  band  box  in  a  cold 
place  to  freeze  to  death.  It  was  taken  out  of  the 
box  and  warmed  and  placed  to  its  mother's  breast 
for  nourishment,  but  she  repeatedly  pushed  it  away. 
•There  was  a  strange  unnaturalness  in  her  lack  of 
affection  for  the  child ;  yet  at  times  she  showed  traits 
of  a  real  mother — how  like  the  old  church  mother 
in  whose  arms  new-born  babes  are  unsafe.  If  the 
holiness  people,  outside  of  these  organizations,  don't 
protect  their  spiritual  infants  by  keeping  the  fire 
burning  in  cottage  meetings,  independent  churches, 
missions,  etc.,  they  will  not  survive  the  treatment 
they  will  receive  at  the  hands  of  the  insane  mother, 
in  whose  lap  they  are  sure  to  fall. 

THE  FIRST  HOLINESS  CAMP  MEETING. 

Our  attention  was  called  one  day  to  a  beautiful 
grove  at  Pleasant  View,  near  by  the  little  church 


1 62  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

where  I  was  used  in  my  first  revival  work.  The 
owner,  in  taking  us  around  over  the  grounds,  re- 
marked that  one  person  had  said  it  would  be  a  good 
place  for  a  beer  garden,  another  that  it  would  be  just 
the  place  for  a  camp  meeting.  I  had  never  before 
heard  of  a  holiness  camp  meeting,  but  for  days  I 
could  not  get  rid  of  the  thought  of  having  one  in  this 
grove.  I  kept  it  continually  before  the  Lord,  be- 
lieving He  would  open  the  way.  During  this  time 
I  did  not  tell  it  to  anyone  for  fear  there  would  be 
objections  to  calling  it  a  holiness  camp  meeting,  and 
I  knew  this  would  be  a  device  of  the  enemy  to  de- 
feat our  purpose.  I  had  prayed  earnestly  for  the 
Lord  to  put  it  on  the  heart  of  my  husband,  and 
Bro.  R.  A.  Calkins  to  co-operate  with  me.  In  this 
my  prayer  was  answered. 

We  enlisted  the  aid  of  Dr.  F.  E.  Yoakum,  and 
proceeded  to  perfect  the  plans.  Dr.  Yoakum  se- 
cured the  services  of  Rev.  Thomas  H.  Leach  and 
Singer  T.  A.  Marshall,  of  Charleston,  S.  C.,  for  a 
holiness  convention  in  the  Hay  Market  Mission, 
Denver.  At  this  convention  the  Colorado  Holiness 
Association  was  organized,  October  4th  and  5th, 
1893.  Officers  elected  were  A.  C.  Peck,  president; 
Dr.  F.  E.  Yoakum,  vice  president ;  Kent  White,  sec- 
retary; Milo  Stark,  treasurer.  The  following 
March  23rd,  Dr.  Yoakum  and  others  from  Denver 
held  a  morning  and  afternoon  service  at  Pleasant 
View,  and  approved  of  the  plans  for  the  first  camp 
meeting  in  Herring's  grove,  June  26th  to  July  5th, 
1894;  also  granted  the  request  to  have  Dr.  W.  B. 
Godbey  as  the  evangelist.  A  few  months  before 


FIRST  CAMP  MEETING.  163 

this  I  had  written  Dr.  Godbey  to  come  and  hold 
services  in  our  church.  He  said  he  could  not  come 
then  as  his  time  was  taken  up  with  holiness  camp 
meetings.  My  burden  for  him  to  come  to  Colorado 
was  of  the  Lord  and  he  now  accepted  the  invitation. 

At  the  time  appointed  the  meeting  opened.  Sis- 
ter Hattie  Livingston  was  with  us  from  Iowa,  and 
kindly  let  us  have  the  use  of  her  gospel  tent  for  this 
and  five  successive  years.  During  this  time  my  hus- 
band had  the  work  of  nearly  all  the  officers  to  do. 

Many  remarkable  things  were  brought  about  in 
the  camp  meeting  in  answer  to  prayer.  In  the  first 
service  the  flood  gates  of  heaven  were  raised  and  our 
souls  inundated.  We  shouted  for  joy.  It  was  truly 
as  Dr.  Godbey  said,  "A  stream  from  the  heavenly 
ocean  from  beginning  to  end."  My  brother  groaned 
in  the-straw,.until  Adam  Jhe^first  diedTancf  returned 
to  his  charge  to  preach  an  uttermost  salvation.  I 
had  been  praying  for  my  mother  arict'God  gave  me 
the  evidence  a  few  months  before  that  she  would  be 
at  this  meeting.  It  seemed  to  be  too  good  to  be 
true.  Imagine  my  feelings  when  a  wagon  drove 
up  from  the  depot  to  the  edge  of  the  grove  with  my 
mother  and  nephew  Charles  (Tony)  Davis  from 
Kentucky.  The  next  day  mother  was  at  the  altar. 
She  sought  and  received  a  blessing.  The  shouts  of 
my  husband  stirred  me  to  the  depths,  and  the  groans 
of  my  brother  awakened  in  me  the  keenest  sympathy, 
but  the  sight  of  her  upturned  face  as  she  cried,  "This 
is  what  I  have  been  wanting  all  these  years,"  was 
more  joy  than  I  could  bear.  I  took  it  to  be  sancti- 
fication,  but  afterwards  she  said  it  was  not  that  that 


164       BOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

she  received ;  she  got  it  later.  She  stayed  with  us  for 
two  years  and  kept  the  children  while  we  went  re- 
sponsive to  the  call  of  the  Lord  in  evangelistic  work. 

Not  being  able  to  get  a  house  on  the  new  cir- 
cuit, we  found  it  most  convenient  to  live  at  Erie, 
from  which  place  the  appointments  could  be  easily 
reached.  The  circuit  pulpits  were  provided  for  and 
the  Lord  opened  the  way  for  us  to  hold  revival  meet- 
ings and  gave  us  the  greatest  victories  of  our  lives. 
In  the  providence  of  God  we  remained  in  the  town 
nearly  two  years  longer,  which  greatly  increased  the 
humiliation  of  those  who  had  sought  to  get  rid  of  us, 
for  in  so  doing  they  had  only  furnished  help  on  the 
other  side.  While  the  people  of  Erie  were  delighted 
with  their  new  pastor,  imagine  their  chagrin  when 
he  sought  and  obtained  the  blessing  of  sanctification 
at  the  camp  meeting.  They  were  beginning  the  new 
year  with  a  worse  problem  than  they  had  before. 

From  time  to  time  the  red  hot  gospel  shot  was 
poured  ugon  them.  SeveTaTmteresting  scenes  were 
witnessed  where  our  presence  added  to  their  discom- 
fort. One  Sunday  morning  when  the  pastor  was 
about  half  way  through  his  discourse  two  men  arose 
and  publicly  denounced  it.  They  reminded  me  of 
lions  ready  to  spring  upon  their  prey,  but  could  go 
no  further  than  their  chains  would  permit. 

THE  DILLON  MEETING. 

July  23rd,  1894,  I  left  Erie  and  joining  my 
brother  the  next  day  at  Denver,  we  took  the  train 
for  Montana.  We  had  a  number  of  relatives  at  Dil- 
lon, all  of  whom  were  unsaved.  It  was  here  that  I 


DILLON  MEETING.  165 

lived  true  to  the  light  in  a  justified  experience  for  a 
number  of  years,  and  was  now  going  back  to  tell 
them  of  something  I  had  in  addition  to  the  first  work 
of  grace. 

My  brother,  who  had  been  preaching  in  an  alti- 
tude four  thousand  feet  above  Denver,  needed  a 
change,  and  after  some  hesitation  he  consented  to 
go  with  me.  On  our  arrival  the  members  of  the 
Methodist  church  immediately  gave  us  a  unanimous 
invitation  to  hold  meetings  for  them. 

Their  pastor  had  gone  to  the  mountains  for  an 
outing,  but  they  thought  with  the  consent  of  the 
official  board  he  would  not  object.  He  returned 
in  a  few  days,  but  instead  of  being  in  favor  of  the 
meeting  he  expressed  himself  as  being  decidedly 
opposed  to  it.  The  Baptist  minister  would  have  been 
in  favor  of  union  services  if  the  co-operation  of  the 
M.  E.  pastor  could  have  been  secured.  The  churches 
being  closed  to  us,  we  sent  to  Denver  for  our  gospel 
tent  and  set  it  up.  There  had  never  been  anything 
like  it  in  the  town  before  and  naturally  it  attracted 
a  great  deal  of  attention. 

The  power  of  the  Lord  was  manifest  in  every 
service  from  the  first.  At  one  time  there  were  seven- 
teen seekers  at  the  altar,  the  most  of  whom  were 
Methodists,  the  pastor's  mother-in-law  being  among 
them.  My  sister  Nora,  after  she  received  the  light, 
was  used  of  God  in  bringing  in  my  oldest  brother, 
who  had  been  backslidden  for  a  number  of  years. 
Several  months  before  I  had  dreamed  he  was  dying 
unprepared  to  meet  God,  and  later  had  a  vision  of 
hell  and  of  his  going  into  it,  which  so  burdened  me 


l66       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

that  I  prayed  until  I  received  the  evidence  of  his 
salvation. 

Most  of  the  seekers  received  a  clear  ex- 
perience of  sanctification,  and  after  the  meetings 
closed  in  the  tabernacle  they  started  holiness  meet- 
ings in  the  homes.  Their  numbers  increased  until 
it  was  hard  to  find  parlors  large  enough  to  accommo- 
date the  people.  Through  their  prayers  a  revival 
was  brought  about  in  the  M.  E.  church.  There  was 
no  spirit  of  come-outism  manifested,  and  all  they 
asked  was  the  privilege  of  continuing  the  weekly 
meetings,  but  the  heads  of  the  church  were  opposed 
to  this  and  took  measures  to  stop  them.  We  were 
told  that  a  preacher  said  at  conference  that  if  he  were 
sent  to  the  charge  he  would  crush  that  movement. 
He  was  sent  and  he  crushed  it.  He  came  as  an  angel 
of  light,  pretending  to  have  the  experience  of  holi- 
ness and  proposing  to  make  all  of  the  church  services 
holiness  meetings.  In  this  way  the  enemy  wilily 
crept  in,  and  the  work  was  stopped  after  continuing 
more  than  two  years. 

FALSE  PROPHETS. 

It  is  astonishing  how  many  people  are  caught 
by  these  church  wolves  in  sheep's  clothing.  God 
says,  "Spots  they  are  and  blemishes,  sporting  them- 
selves with  their  own  deceivings  while  they  feast 
with  you ;  having  eyes  full  of  adultery,  and  that  can 
not  cease  from  sin;  beguiling  unstable  souls;  an 
heart  they  have  exercised  with  covetous  practices; 
which  have  forsaken  the  right  way,  and  are  gone 
astray,  following  the  way  of  Balaam.  *  *  *  While 


PROPHETS.  167 

they  promise  them  liberty,  they  themselves  are  the 
servants  of  corruption."  (II.  Peter  2:13-19.)  "Nev- 
ertheless the  foundation  of  God  standeth  sure,  having 
this  seal.  The  Lord-knoweth  them  that  are  His." 
(II.  Tim.  2:19.)  John  says,  "Beloved,  believe  not 
every  spirit,  but  try  the  spirits  whether  they  are  of 
God ;  because  many  false  prophets  are  gone  out  into 
the  world.  (I.  John  4:1.) 

In  this  time  of  awful  apostacy,  it  behooves  us 
to  heed  the  above  warning.  Satan  has  kept  his 
preachers  busy  all  through  the  centuries  and  there 
are  more  of  them  to-day  whose  records  are  being 
written  on  the  black  parchments  of  the  pit  than  any 
time  in  the  history  of  the  world.  Sometimes  they 
wear  long  hair  but  they  are  not  so  much  to  be  feared 
when  they  come  like  this.  One  may  be  a  spiritualist, 
a  Mormon  elder  or  a  devotee  of  Mrs.  Eddy's  so- 
called  Christian  Science,  a  Universalist  or  an  anni- 
hilationist  or  even  a  Dowieite,  yet  in  these  channels 
it  will  be  easier  to  locate  them  as  heretics  or  fanatics 
than  many  who  are  found  in  the  rank  and  file  of 
professed  orthodoxy.  The  time  may  have  been 
when  some  of  the  latter  had  real  spiritual  light,  and 
a  desire  to  see  souls  saved,  but  they  have  long  since 
lost  their  grip  on  the  word  of  God  and  forfeited  the 
rights  and  claims  of  a  Christian  minister,  and  are 
now  manipulating  the  forces  that  are  set  in  motion 
in  the  regions  of  the  lost.  They  belong  to  the  sala- 
ried ministry,  move  in  religious  circles  and  fill  prom- 
inent offices  and  pulpits,  courteously  granted  to  them 
by  the  fallen  denominations  to  which  they  belong. 
You  may  find  them  in  the  Epworth  Leagues  and 


l68  BOOKING  BACK  FROM 

Christian  Endeavor  Societies;  in  Sunday  School 
Conventions,  Conferences  and  Synods;  in  the  social 
circles  of  the  rich,  in  the  theological  chairs,  on  the 
lecture  platforms  and  in  the  banqueting  halls  at  the 
bishops'  receptions.  They  often  preach  the  baccalau- 
reate sermons  and  edit  the  church  papers.  They  may 
be  found  among  the  delegates  to  the  General  Confer- 
ences and  the  Synods,  or  among  the  Secretaries  of 
the  Benevolent  Societies  or  at  the  heads  of  Book 
Concerns.  Some  of  you  would  never  have  thought  of 
looking  in  these  places  for  the  class  of  preachers 
John  is  talking  about.  You  will  be  blind  to  all  of 
this  until  the  baptism  of  the  Holy  Ghost  and  fire 
burns  the  scales  off  of  your  eyes.  Listen  to  Jere- 
miah's words,  "Hear  now  this,  O  foolish  people,  and 
without  understanding;  which  have  eyes,  and  see 
not;  which  have  ears  and  hear  not.  *  *  *  For 
among  my  people  are  found  wicked  men;  they  lay 
wait,  as  he  that  setteth  snares;  they  set  a  trap,  they 
catch  men.  *  *  *  They  are  waxen  fat,  they 
shine:  yea,  they  overpass  the  deeds  of  the  wicked: 
they  judge  not  the  cause  of  the  fatherless,  yet  they 
prosper.  *  *  *  Shall  I  not  visit  for  these  things  ? 
saith  the  Lord :  shall  not  my  soul  be  avenged  on 
such  a  nation  as  this  ?  The  prophets  prophesy  falsely 
and  the  priests  bear  rule  by  their  means ;  and  my  peo- 
ple love  to  have  it  so:  and  what  will  ye  do  in  the 
end  thereof?"  (Jer.-5  121-31.)  Paul  says  they  are 
"traitors,  heady,  highminded,  lovers  of  pleasure 
more  than  lovers  of  God;  having  a  form  of  godli- 
ness, but  denying  the  power  thereof;"  and  adds, 
"From  such  turn  away."  (2  Tim.  3:4-5.) 


FALSE  PROPHETS.  169 

Not  long  ago  a  pastor  in  Denver,  who  claimed 
to  have  the  Holy  Ghost,  took  his  flock  and  attended 
the  famous  Gentry  dog  show  within  a  block  of  the 
holiness  tent  meeting.  The  Ringling  Brothers,  with 
their  great  circus,  paraded  the  streets  with  a  piece 
of  canvass  thrown  over  an  elephant's  back  adver- 
tising the  beer  of  a  famous  brewer,  and  following  it 
came  a  Methodist  preacher,  with  his  family,  going 
to  the  circus.  Another  pastor  went  to  see  a  prize  < 
fight.  Not  much  worse  does  the  degenerate  priest 
of  Mexico  who  attends  the  cock  and  bull  fights  on 
Sundays. 

A  picture  comes  before  me  of  false  prophets 
skulking  away  behind  the  charred  walls  of  perdition 
to  avoid  meeting  with  souls  they  had  helped  to  de- 
lude and  damn.  Ever  and  anon  they  are  greeted 
with  scorpion  tongues  of  fiery  denunciation.  The 
door  of  mercy  is  forever  closed.  The  gulf  widens 
and  hell's  eternal  night  continues  to  blacken,  while 
its  victims  sink  deeper  and  deeper  into  its  awful 
depths. 

Like  animals  led  to  the  slaughter  many  will 
never  understand  until  the  fatal  blow  is  given.  Sin 
causes  stupidity  and  blindness,  and  the  whole  diffi- 
culty lies  in  an  unwillingness  to  forsake  all  and  fol- 
low Jesus,  hence  they  become  the  dupes  of  false 
prophets,  false  doctrines,  and  every  form  of  demo- 
niacal heresy.  The  Lord  says,  "Whosoever  he  be  of 
you  that  forsaketh  not  all  that  he  hath,  can  not  be 
my  disciple."  (Luke  14:33.)  How  many  are 
clinging  with  their  hearts  to  the  things  of  the  world 
and  vainly  imagine  that  they  will  be  saved?  "Love 


BOOKING  BACK  FROM 

not  the  world,  neither  the  things  that  are  in  the 
world.  If  any  man  love  the  world  the  love  of  the 
Father  is  not  in  him."  (I  John  2:15.) 

Soon  we  will  be  under  the  white  lights  of  the 
judgment  bar.  The  Judge  of  all  the  earth  will  open 
the  book.  "There  is  nothing  covered  that  shall  not 
be  revealed;  neither  hid,  that  shall  not  be  made 
known."  (Luke  12  :2.)  We  are  commanded  to  "Cry 
aloud,  spare  not,  lift  up  thy  voice  like  a  trumpet, 
and  declare  unto  my  people  their  transgression,  and 
to  the  house  of  Jacob  their  sins."  (Isa.  58  :i.) 

The  preacher  who  spares  carnality  is  not  worthy 
the  name,  and  will  suffer  an  awful  retribution.  Peo- 
ple arc  looking  to  him,  instead  of  reading  their  Bibles 
and  seeking  light  from  God;  hence  the  greater  his 
responsibility,  while  they  will  be  judged  for  follow- 
ing him  when  there  was  abundant  evidence  that  he 
was  not  being  led  of  God.  Truly  the  time  has  come 
"when  they  will  not  endure  sound  doctrine,  but  after 
their  own  lusts  shall  they  heap  to  themselves  teach- 
ers, having  itching  ears."  (II.  Tim.  4:3.)  John 
Wesley  says  of  such  preachers,  "They  say  much  of 
the  promises  and  little  of  the  commands,  that  they 
corrupt  their  hearers,  vitiate  their  appetites  so  that 
they  cannot  endure  sound  doctrine  or  receive  true 
nourishment.  They  feed  them  with  sweet  meats 
until  the  bread  and  meat  of  the  kingdom  becomes 
unpalatable,  and  it  is  often  extremely  difficult  to  re- 
cover them  from  their  enfeebled  state  and  get 
strength  and  vigor  in  their  souls.  Preachers  of  this 
kind,  though  it  may  appear  otherwise,  spread  death 
rather  than  life  among  the  people."  Then  such  pro- 


PROPHETS. 


fessors  of  religion  are  harder  to  deal  with  than  those 
who  make  no  profession  at  all,  and  yet  they  think 
that  the  wheels  of  God's  machinery  would  stop  if 
they  ceased  to  co-operate.  They  are  like  the  Jews 
at  the  time  of  Christ,  who  thought  they  were  indis- 
pensible  in  the  economy  of  God;  that  there  was  no 
doing  without  them;  that  they  were  the  seed  of 
Abraham  and  that  there  were  none  to  take  their 
place.  They  needed  some  one  like  John  the  Baptist 
to  cry  in  their  ears,  "God  is  able  of  these  stones  to 
raise  up  children  unto  Abraham."  (Matt.  3:9.) 
The  publicans  and  harlots  stood  a  better  chance  to 
go  into  the  kingdom  than  the  priests  and  elders 
(Matt.  21:31),  yet  they  believed  they  would  have 
an  abundant  entrance. 

Again  some  of  the  carnal-minded  ask,  "Have 
any  of  the  rulers  believed  on  Him?"  If  so  they  can 
afford  to  put  themselves  on  record,  too  ;  if  not,  there 
is  too  much  at  stake.  Like  the  chameleon,  they  im- 
mediately change  their  color.  It  takes  much  of  the 
grace  of  forbearance  to  deal  with  church  professors 
who  have  no  salvation.  Jesus  had  a  trial  of  it  that 
ended  in  His  death. 

MEETING  AT  POCATElvLO,  IDAHO. 

On  our  way  to  Dillon  we  stopped  off  at  Poca- 
tello,  Idaho,  to  avoid  traveling  on  Sunday.  Attend- 
ing the  Methodist  church  the  next  morning,  we  met 
the  pastor,  who  asked  us  to  hold  a  meeting  for  him 
on  our  return. 

We  found  the  church  as  cold  and  lifeless  as  a 
graveyard.  It  took  almost  two  weeks  of  hard  pray- 


LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

ing  and  preaching  to  dig  the  people  out.  The  pastor 
prayed  to  be  filled  with  the  Spirit,  but  it  was  useless 
to  pray  such  a  prayer  unless  he  was  willing  to  be 
emptied.  If  he  had  only  confessed  his  backslidings 
and  stepped  out  of  the  way  of  others,  the  barrier  in 
the  meeting  would  have  been  removed;  but  instead 
of  this,  at  every  request  for  those  who  were  sancti- 
fied to  stand,  he  was  the  first  on  his  feet.  As  the 
ostrich  fleeing  from  his  pursuer,  sticks  his  head  in 
the  sand  and  vainly  imagines  he  is  not  seen,  so  peo- 
ple covering  up  sin  in  their  hearts  imagine  their 
spiritual  standing  is  not  discerned,  but  it  is.  (I  Co*-. 
2:14-16.) 

The  last  Sunday  evening  my  brother  preached, 
and  I  followed  with  an  exhortation  which  for  some 
reason  did  not  please  the  pastor.  On  reaching  the 
parsonage,  after  the  services,  he  turned  on  me  like 
a  ferocious  beast.  The  tiger  that  had  been  crouching 
away  in  his  soul  was  turned  loose  and,  white  with 
rage,  he  poured  his  wrath  upon  me.  We  wonder  at 
the  mercy  and  patience  of  God.  The  sermon  was  on 
temperance,  and  I  remarked  that  the  professing 
Christians  were  voting  with  the  saloon  men.  This 
stirred  him,  for  he  was  a  politician  and  had  been 
voting  with  the  saloon  keepers  for  the  accursed 
whiskey  traffic  all  his  life.  Truly  sin  in  the  pulpit 
is  worse  than  sin  in  the  saloon  or  brothel. 

BUND  WATCHMEN. 

Isaiah  (56:10-11),  speaking  of  false  prophets, 
says :  "His  watchmen  are  blind ;  they  are  all  igno- 
rant; they  are  all  dumb  dogs,  they  can  not  bark; 


PROPHETS.  173 

sleeping,  lying  down,  loving  to  slumber.  Yea,  they 
are  greedy  dogs,  which  can  never  have  enough,  and 
they  are  shepherds  that  cannot  understand;  they  all 
look  to  their  own  way,  every  one  for  his  gain  from 
his  quarter."' 

God's  people  had  become  a  reproach  and  other 
nations  were  preying  upon  His  heritage.  These  na- 
tions He  compared  to  the  wild  beasts  of  the  forest, 
typical  of  the  wild  beast  of  depravity,  which  is  de- 
vouring His  flock  everywhere.  How  could  it  be 
otherwise  with  prophets  that  are  compared  to  dogs 
that  are  blind,  ignorant  and  dumb,  sleeping,  lying 
down  and  loving  to  slumber.  They  could  neither  see 
nor  hear  the  approach  of  the  enemy,  taking  their 
ease  right  in  the  time  of  greatest  danger.  Who  are 
foolish  enough  to  keep  a  watchman  of  this  kind  on 
guard  ?  Only  those  who  are.  blind,  dumb  and  igno- 
rant themselves.  Spiritual  blindness  and  ignorance 
lead  to  all  kinds  of  blunders,  and  under  these  condi- 
tions human  weakness  will  manifest  itself  in  the 
form  of  pity,  church  loyalty,  submission  to  false 
prophets  and  carnal  pastors.  We  have  heard  persons 
of  this  class  say,  "Our  pastor  is  not  very  spiritual, 
but  he  is  a  good  man."  A  woman  lately  said  to  us, 
"Our  pastor  delivers  nice  sermons,  but  why  is  it  we 
seem  to  die  under  his  preaching?"  It  is  said  that 
when  ^Eschines,  the  ancient  Greek  orator,  spoke, 
the  people  said,  "That  is  beautiful;"  but  when  De- 
mosthenes, his  opponent,  delivered  an  oration,  they 
would  say,  "Let  us  go  and  fight  Philip."  Many 
preachers  are  brilliant  and  beautiful — that  is  all. 
There  are  others,  when  heard,  the  people  say,  "Let 


174  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

us  quit  the  evil  of  our  doings ;"  "let  us  get  convert- 
ed," or,  "let  us  get  sanctified."  People  everywhere 
to-day  deplore  the  state  of  the  minister  in  the-pulpit. 
They  acknowledge  that  he  is  void  of  spir- 
itual life  and  power,  yet  they  feel  it  is 
their  duty  to  give  him  their  consecrated  money,  sim- 
ply because  they  pity  him.  The  truth  is  they  are 
keeping  him  in  a  place  where  he  can  do  more  harm 
than  a  thousand  demons,  for  "if  the  blind  lead  the 
blind  both  shall  fall  into  the  ditch."  Some  professed 
holiness  people  say  we  must  pursue  this  course,  keep 
sweet  and  try  to  get  the  preacher  into  a  better  ex- 
perience. While  he  is  no  more  precious  than  any 
other  person,  yet  the  devil  appears  as  an  angel  of 
light  and  has  his  soul  weighed  and  valued  above 
whole  congregations  that  he  is  helping  -to  delude 
and  damn.  Some  of  our  people  haven't  common 
sense  enough  to  keep  them  out  of  the  fire  on  this 
point.  The  light  in  them  has  become  darkness,  and 
how  great  is  that  darkness.  God's  plan  is  to  expose 
hypocrisy,  not  to  cover  it  up.  It  is  our  business  to 
uncover  sin  and  call  things  by  their  right  names, 
whatever  the  consequences  may  be.  The  old  church 
forests  are  full  of  ravenous  beasts,  preying  upon 
God's  heritage  with  only  here  and  there  a  pastor 
who  refuses  to  cry  peace,  peace,  when  there  is  no 
peace.  -Those  wild  beasts  may  be  truly  designated 
by  the  word  carnality.  Look  for  immense  piles  of 
brick  and  mortar,  stained  glass,  cushioned  pews,  and 
here  you  will  find  the  carcasses  of  their  prey.  Pride, 
lust,  avarice,  deceit,  malice,  envy,  hatred  are  the  very 
essence  of  carnality,  and  these  things  have  eaten  like 


PROPHETS.  175 

a  canker  until  the  very  vitals  of  the  denominations 
around  about  us  have  been  reached.  While  this  pro- 
cess goes  on,  the  pastors  instead  of  being-  like  true 
watchmen  on  a  tower,  "are  all  greedy  dogs,  all  look- 
ing to  their  own  way;  every  one  for  his  gain  from 
his  quarter." 

Once  I  saw  a  comic  picture  of  a  sly  old  fox  with 
his  foot  on  a  duck's  neck.  With  a  grin  of  satisfac- 
tion, he  asked  "whose  little  ducky  are  oo?"  The 
reply  was,  "I'se  your  little  duck)'-."  In  picture  num- 
ber two  there  were  only  a  few  bones  and  feathers 
left.  A  word  to  the  wise  is  sufficient. 


CHAPTER  XIV. 

REMARKABLE  EXPERIENCES  IN  THE  WORK. 

We  reached  home  after  an  absence  of  eleven 
weeks.  Our  little  Ray  was  playing  near  the  gate. 
He  had  so  improved  in  health  that  I  did  not  recog- 
nize him  at  first.  Arthur,  the  oldest,  who  had  ac- 
companied us,  seeing  my  confusion,  said :  "Mamma, 
don't  you  know  him  ?  it  is  Ray,  sure  it  is."  He  was 
no  longer  the  little  delicate  child  I  had  constantly 
watched  and  wept  over  for  months.  It  took  all  the 
grace  God  had  given  me  to  stay  away  from  him 
until  my  work  was  done.  Mother  had  written  to  me 
how  fast  he  was  gaining  in  flesh,  but  I  was  not  pre- 
pared for  this  surprise.  Truly  the  Lord  had  done 
more  than  I  had  asked  or  thought.  Never  had  my 
labors  been  so  fruitful  in  the  same  length  of  time. 
"He  brought  us  out  from  thence  that  He  might 
bring  us  in,  to  give  us  the  land  which  He  swore  unto 
our  fathers"  (Deut.  6:23) — a  fruitful  land.  Within 
six  months  seven  of  my  nearest  relatives  were  re- 
claimed or  sanctified,  one  or  two  having  received 
both  experiences.  Paul's  words  to  the  Philippian 
jailor,  "Thou  shalt  be  saved  and  thy  house,"  were 
being  fulfilled  in  my  case,  and  I  marveled  at  the 
humble  instrumentality  used  to  bring  it  about.  One 
thing  I  knew,  that  every  atom  of  my  being  was  con- 
secrated to  God  and  that  I  was  on  His  altar  either 
for  service  or  sacrifice. 


EXPERIENCES  IN  THE  WORK.  177 

"Beloved,  if  our  heart  condemn  us  not,  then 
have  we  confidence  toward  God.  And  whatsoever 
we  ask  we  receive  of  Him,  because  we  keep  His 
commandments,  and  do  those  things  that  are  pleas- 
ing in  His  sight."  (I.  Jokn  3:21-22.)  If  Enoch 
of  the  antediluvian  world  could  know  that  he  pleased 
God,  how  much  more  reasonable  that  we  should 
know  it  now  in  the  Holy  Ghost  dispensation.  The 
Son  is  not  honored  when  we  continually  bemoan  our 
lukewarmness,  shortcomings,  crooked  paths,  etc.  An 
uttermost  salvation  is  provided  and  we  have  nothing 
to  do  but  pay  the  price  and  take  it. 

After  resting  for  two  weeks  I  went  to  help  one 
of  our  Methodist  brethren,  holding  two  meetings  on 
his  charge.  At  the  first  place  a  great  work  was  done. 
There  were  shouts  of  victory  from  liberated  souls. 
At  one  service  every  person  in  the  house  converted 
and  unsaved  were  on  their  knees.  A  moment  of 
silent  prayer  followed,  when  the  power  of  God  fell 
on  the  people.  A  brother  was  so  convicted  on  com- 
ing to  the  altar  that  it  frightened  him  and  he  ran 
from  the  house,  not  stopping  until  he  reached  his 
brother's  house  two  miles  away.  They  questioned 
him  about  leaving  the  church.  He  told  them  that  he 
felt  so  much  worse  after  going  forward  that  he 
thought  it  best  to  get  out  of  there  in  a  hurry.  He 
could  not  be  induced  to  return.  Many  persons  on  the 
very  threshold  of  the  kingdom  were  driven  back 
by  the  enemy  because  of  ignorance  of  thejpffice  work 
of  the  Holy  Spirit  jn  Bringing  them  to  see  theTngTTt- 
ful  condition  of  their  heart. 

An  avaricious  old  man  and  his  wife  living  in 


LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

the  community  were  invited  to  attend  the  services. 
They  came,  but  with  the  determination  not  to  give 
a  penny,  as  .he  thought  it  was  his  money  they  were 
after.  Jesus  going  to  abide  with  Zaccheus,  and 
His  giving  to  the  poor  (Luke  I9th  ch.)  was  the 
subject  of  the  evening  discourse.  He  took  the  mes- 
sage all  to  himself  and  before  the  work  of  conviction 
was  accomplished  in  his  heart,  he  placed  his  hand  up- 
on his  pocket  and  said,  "You  haven't  got  anything 
out  of  my  pocketb^k  yet.'  The  people  said  that  he 
would  not  come  again.  Early  the  next  evening  he 
called  at  the  home  where  I  was  being  entertained 
and  handed  me  a  ten  dollar  gold  piece.  He  was  on 
his  way  to  the  church  and  at  the  first  invitation,  to 
the  surprise  of  ail,  he  and  his  wife  came  forward  and 
gave  their  hearts  to  God.  With  her  it  proved  to  be 
the  eleventh  hour;  she  was  soon  called  to  meet  her 
God. 

A  Presbyterian,  who  showed  no  signs  of  spir- 
itual life,  excused  himself  from  testifying  by  saying 
that  he  confessed  Jesus  in  his  daily  walk.  The  Scrip- 
ture was  quoted  to  him,  "For  with  the  heart  man 
believeth  unto  righteousness,  and  with  the  mouth 
confession  is  made  unto  salvation."  (Rom.  10-10.) 
This  and  other  passages  convicted  him  and  he  went 
to  the  altar.  The  light  soon  broke  in  on  his  soul 
and  he  was  ready  ever  after  that  to  tell  what  the 
Lord  had  done  for  him.  His  timidity  had  been  a 
great  humiliation  to  him  as  he  had  been  unable  to 
speak  in  any  kind  of  public  meetings.  Now,  he  re- 
joiced in  his  freedom,  testifying  for  Jesus. 

The  next  meeting  was  held  at  L— — .    Here  the 


EXPERIENCES  IN  THE  WORK.  179 

people  were  'building  on  the  sand  of  good  works 
and  church  membership.  Their  ministers  had  dealt 
largely  in  untempered  mortar,  and  when  the  sledge^ 
hammer  of  God's  word  began  to  shake  theiFoId  wall, 
they  became  frightened  and  were  afraid  to  have  the 
foundation  discovered. 

There  were  twenty-two  persons  at  one  time  at 
the  altar.  The  most  of  them  were  church  members 
who  had  never  been  converted.  They  complained 
that  I  was  preaching  to  Christians  after  they  had 
invited  me  there  to  preach  to  sinners.  Whatever 
profession  they  may  have  made,  I  believed  I  was 
preaching  to  sinners  just  the  same.  While  the  pastor 
professed  holiness,  I  knew  that  he  did  not.  have  the 
experience,  and  his  profession  of  it  was  simply  to 
dodge  the  issue.  I  was  led  one  day  to  tell  him  what 
I  thought  but  shrank  from  it,  knowing  that  the  pre- 
siding elder  had  recommended  me  and  I  feared  it 
would  close  up  my  work  in  the  churches.  That  night 
I  tried  to  speak  but  found  it  impossible  even  with  a 
familiar  subject.  I  was  humiliated  and  told  them 
I  could  not  speak  unless  the  Holy  Ghost  gave  me 
the  message.  The  special  meetings  closed  that  night. 
The  next  Sunday  I  rode  with  the  pastor  to  his  other 
appointment.  We  were  talking  about  the  closing 
service,  and  my  being  unable  to  speak,  when  he  said 
he  was  partly  to  blame  for  it  himself,  but  went  no 
further  with  the  confession.  God  says,  "Judgment 
also  will  I  lay  to  the  line,  and  righteousness  to  the 
plummet;  and  the  hail  shall  sweep  away  the  refuge 
of  lies,  and  the  waters  shall  overflow  the  hiding 
place."  (Isa.  28:17.)  In  this  meeting  I  lost  a  vie- 


l8o  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


tory  by  consulting  with  flesh  and  blood  (a  presiding 
elder)  instead  of  being  guided  by  the  Lord.  I  gave 
way  through  fear  to  influences  that  are  stripping 
evangelists  everywhere  of  their  power.  I  was  not 
so  conscious  of  it  then,  but  it  came  to  me  later.  I 
thought  I  was  just  using  a  little  wisdom.  It  taught 
me  a  lesson. 

A  few  hours  after  reaching  home  our  youngest 
child,  who  had  been  so  well  during  my  absence, 
was  taken  very  ill.  I  believed  that  God  could  keep 
him  from  sickness  while  I  was  at  home  as  well  as 
when  I  was  away  and  prayed  to  this  end.  The  as- 
surance was  received  that  it  would  be  so,  and  for 
six  years  neither  of  the  children  have  known  what 
it  is  to  be  sick,  with  the  exception  of  a  case  of 
measles.  To-day,  September  2Oth,  1900,  I  am  a 
thousand  miles  from  home.  My  husband  writes: 
"The  children  are  well.  I  have  great  soul  rest  and 
the  evidence  that  God  will  bless  you  in  the  work 
there."  With  the  Psalmist,  my  heart  cries,  "Let 
everything  that  hath  breath  praise  the  Lord.  His 
soul  shall  dwell  at  ease  and  his  seed  shall  inherit  the 
earth."  (Ps.  25:13.)  "I  will  abide  in  Thy  taber- 
nacle forever:  I  will  trust  in  the  covert  of  Thy 
wings.  For  Thou,  O  God,  hast  heard  my  vows; 
Thou  hast  given  me  the  heritage  of  those  who  fear 
Thy  name."  (Ps.  61  14-5.) 

REVIVAL  AT  BALD  MOUNTAIN. 

Our  next  meeting  was  at  Bald  Mountain,  where 
my  brother  was  pastor.  My  husband  preceded  me 
there  a  week  and,  with  the  pastor,  had  done  some 


REVIVAL  AT  BAI^D  MOUNTAIN.  l8l 

faithful  calling  and  preaching,  several  having  been 
converted  in  their  homes. 

Sunday  morning  I  attended  the  class  meeting 
where  the  spiritual  pulse  of  the  church  was  felt.  By 
their  testimonies  it  was  evident  that  the  old  man  of 
sin  was  becoming  very  offensive  to  some,  as  they 
told  of  their  struggles,  failures,  ups  and  downs,  etc., 
and  their  desire  for  deliverance. 

The  anointing  of  the  Lord  was  upon  me.  In 
the  first  service,  I  had  only  spoken  a  few  minutes, 
when  the  people  began  to  weep  all  over  the  house. 
My  husband  followed  with  an  exhortation.  The 
invitation  was  given  and  the,  altar  and  front  seats 
were  soon  filled  with  seekers.  The  power  continued 
to  fall  as  men  called  on  God  with  faces  bathed  in 
tears.  The  Sunday  School  superintendent,  who  was 
a  local  preacher,  was  at  one  end  of  the  altar  suffering 
the  pangs  of  "Old  Adam"  in  death  agonies,  while  at 
the  other  end  a  class  leader  cried  for  deliverance. 
The  latter  wras  the  first  to  receive  the  blessing,  while 
others  soon  followed.  One  brother  leaped  to  his 
feet  shouting.  Some  were  making  confessions  of 
their  wrongs  and  were  embracing  each  other. 

In  the  afternoon  the  Sunday  School  was  turned 
over  to  us,  which  closed  with  fifty  scholars  and  their 
teachers  at  the  altar. 

In  the  evening  the  house  was  packed  to  the 
gallery.  I  never  felt  greater  weakness  than  when 
going  on  the  rostrum  to  speak,  not  knowing  a  word 
I  was  going  to  say.  The  class  leader  who  had  shout- 
ed over  the  death  of  the  "old  man"  in  the  morning 
got  hold  of  the  horns  of  the  altar  in  prayer.  While 


1 82  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

he  was  praying  the  Lord  gave  me  a  message,  and 
for  another  forty  minutes  the  Holy  Ghost  had  the 
right  of  way.  People  trembled  in  their  seats.  This 
was  one  of  the  old  battlefields  in  the  Colorado  Con- 
ference. The  devil  had  previously  contested  every 
inch  of  the  ground.  There  were  many  powerful  con- 
versions during  this  meeting,  the  following  being 
among  them : 

A   CONFLICT   WITH   SATAN   OVER   A   SICK   BED   FOR   A 
SOUL. 

Two  brothers  in  the  prime  of  life  were  em- 
ployed in  a  mine.  Both  were  worldly  and  drifting 
away  from  the  influence  of  an  early  Christian  home. 
Their  father  had  died  in  the  triumph  of  a  living 
faith ;  their  mother,  still  alive,  was  praying  for  them 
across  the  sea. 

In  the  dismal  recesses  of  the  gold  mine,  hun- 
dreds of  feet  below  the  surface  of  the  earth  and 
thousands  of  miles  from  their  boyhood  home,  these 
brothers  worked,  unmindful  of  that  sainted  father 
arid  praying  mother.  An  awful  but  merciful  God 
startled  them  from  their  sinful  sleep.  A  large  rock 
from  its  place  in  the  wall  fell  upon  one  of  them, 
crushing  his  lower  parts  and  breaking  his  back.  The 
unharmed  brother  stood  for  a  moment  transfixed 
with  horror,  powerless  to  remove  the  three-ton  rock 
that  had  pinioned  him  to  the  earth.  He  cried  out, 
"Call  on  God"  and  fled  for  help.  Help  came,  the 
rock  broken  in  pieces  by  sledges  liberated  the  man 
alive  to  the  amazement  of  all. 

For  some  time  he  was  kept  under  the  influence 


REVIVAL  AT  BALD  MOUNTAIN.  183 

of  morphine,  which  produced  its  ghastly  effects. 
There  he  lay  unconscious,  his  breathing  labored  and 
heavy,  unprepared  to  meet  his  God.  Providence 
spoke  to  people  in  terrible  tones  as  they  looked  on 
the  scene.  Those  under  deep  conviction  trembled. 
Even  the  unsaved  prayed  for  the  salvation  of  his 
soul.  After  the  influence  of  the  narcotic  had  worn 
off  he  was  exhorted  and  prayed  with,  but  no  action 
in  behalf  of  his  soul  could  he  be  persuaded  to  take. 
He  affirmed  that  he  would  not  die  a  coward;  he 
would  die  as  he  lived.  Finally,  in  great  distress  of 
mind,  people  called  on  us  to  make  a  special  effort. 
We  went,  but  he  gave  us  no  encouragement.  He 
sorely  tried  us  by  his  indifference.  "Too  late;  no 
use  to  pray,"  he  would  say.  He  finally  consented  to 
our  offering  a  word  of  prayer.  We  felt  the  opposing 
forces  against  us  trying  to  drive  us  from  the  room, 
but  the  Spirit  held  us.  One  of  us  bowed  in  tears 
while  the  other  besought  him  to  look  to  Jesus  and 
pray.  He  delayed,  but  at  last  he  said,  "Lord  be  mer- 
ciful to  me  a  sinner." 

Instantly  mighty  ejaculations  of  prayer  burst 
forth  so  earnestly  as  to  be  startling.  What  a  reve- 
lation God  immediately  gave  this  man  of  his  heart, 
what  an  uplift  from  indifference  to  earnestness.  Only 
for  a  brief  period  did  the  Savior  withhold  Himself, 
then  as  He  showed  His  face  in  the  power  of  His 
salvation,  the  poor  penitent  cried,  "Blessed  Jesus! 
Blessed  Jesus!  I  am  saved!  I  am  saved!  I  am 
saved !" 

Powerless  to  move  his  body,  he  turned  his  eye 
to  his  brother  and  cried,  "Lord,  save  my  brother," 


184  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

and  for  him  and  his  unsaved  landlady  he  prayed 
most  fervently.  He  shouted  for  joy,  "Mother's 
prayers  are  answered."  "My  father's  face  has  been 
before  me  in  this  room  with  tears  in  his  eyes  as  he 
said,  'Son,  look  to  Jesus.' ' 

For  fifteen  days  he  preached,  prayed  and  sung, 
lying  on  his  back,  not  expecting  to  live  from  one  day 
to  another.  At  the  end  of  this  time,  sensation  that 
had  left  his  body  from  the  waist  down,  returned, 
which  gave  promise  of  an  extension  of  life,  but  in 
a  most  pitiable  condition. 

The  burden  that  was  upon  us  gave  us  the  as- 
surance that  the  Spirit  had  not  left  the  dying  man. 
A  mother's  and  father's  prayers  were  answered  in 
his  being  spared  from  sudden  death,  and  our  being 
held  to  the  bedside  until  the  benighted,  reluctant  soul 
yielded  to  Christ.  Such  an  experience  made  us  trem- 
ble, then  weep  for  joy.  Surely  the  salvation  of  Jesus 
is  wonderful,  yea  glorious.  Let  angels  rejoice  and 
let  us  never  despair  of  a  soul. 

Three  years  and  a  half  later  the  pastor  of  this 
church  informed  us  that  James  Letcher,  the  subject 
of  the  above  sketch,  died  in  triumph.  He  grew  in 
grace  and  in  the  knowledge  of  God,  manifesting  a 
spirit  of  submission  in  his  suffering  to  the  end. 

They  were  anxious  to  have  me  assist  in  a  re- 
vival meeting  on  my  husband's  charge.  Three  times 
I  went  to  begin  it,  not  because  I  had  any  leadings 
of  the  Spirit,  but  simply  to  please  my  husband  and 
the  people.  Each  time  the  meetings  were  defeated 
either  by  the  weather  or  by  sickness  in  the  homes. 
The  Lord  had  so  wonderfully  blessed  our  labors  at 


THE;  LORD  LEADING.  185 

other  places  that  they  naturally  supposed  we  would 
have  a  revival  here,  which  they  hoped  might  result 
in  a  new  church  building,  but  it  was  not  the  Lord's 
plan  for  us  to  take  root  again  in  the  conference.  He 
had  pulled  us  up  to  replant  us  in  a  larger  field.  We 
thank  God  for  the  instruments  used  to  bring  this 
about,  however  severe  they  might  have  seemed  at 
the  time.  "Surely  the  wrath  of  man  shall  praise 
Thee :  the  remainder  of  wrath  shalt  Thou  restrain." 
(Ps.  76:10.) 

We  were  not  depending  alone  on  this  charge 
for  support,  for  the  Lord  sent  in  supplies  from  other 
sources  and  we  lacked  nothing. 

Concerning  our  future  we  were  not  left  in  the 
dark.  Three  weeks  before  the  conference  it  was 
made  plain  that  we  were  to  go  into  the  evangelistic 
and  missionary  work.  At  ten  o'clock  one  morning 
we  were  praying  together  when  the  light  flooded  our 
souls  and  the  path  was  made  clear  before  us.  A 
year  before  we  would  have  been  entirely  unprepared 
for  this,  but  the  various  experiences  through  which 
we  had  passed  gradually  brought  us  to  it.  In  asking 
the  Lord  to  give  me  additional  evidence  from  His 
Word,  I  picked  up  the  Bible;  with  my  eyes  closed 
I  opened  the  Book  and  placed  my  finger  on  the  page, 
after  having  said,  "Lord,  put  forth  your  hand  and 
touch  the  scripture."  I  had  opened  to  the  first  chap- 
ter of  Jeremiah,  my  finger  upon  the  first  line  of  the 
ninth  verse,  which  read :  "Then  the  Lord  put  forth 
His  hand."  I  was  so  overcome  it  was  some  time 
before  I  could  read  what  followed.  My  own  words 
were  repeated  in  answer  to  the  request  for  additional 


1 86  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

light.  As  soon  as  I  could  see  through  my  tears  I 
continued  to  read,  "and  touched  my  mouth.  And 
the  Lord  said  unto  me,  "Behold  I  have  put  my  words 
into  thy  mouth.  See,  I  have  this  day  set  thee  *  *  * 
to  root  out,  and  to  pull  down,  and  to  destroy,  and 
to  throw  down  and  to  build,  and  to  plant."  The 
seventh  and  eighth  verses  were  for  me  also :  "And 
the  Lord  said  unto  me,  say  not  I  am  a  child;  for 
thou  shalt  go  to  all  that  I  shall  send  thee,  and  what- 
soever I  command  thee  thou  shalt  speak.  Be  not 
afraid  of  their  faces;  for  I  am  with  thee  to  deliver 
thee,  said  the  Lord."  My  husband  when  he  received 
his  first  students'  appointment,  went  to  his  room  and 
fell  upon  his  knees  feeling  incapable  for  the  work  and 
cried,  "Lord  I  am  but  a  child,  I  can  not  go!"  Look- 
ing through  tears  at  his  Bible  open  in  front  of  him, 
his  eyes  met  the  above  words,  "Say  not  I  am  a  child," 
etc.  He  believed  it  was  from  God  and  the  Spirit  so 
witnessed,  so  I  believed  God  spoke  to  me  as  truly  as 
He  did  to  the  prophet  of  old. 

We  never  enjoyed  a  conference  session  more 
than  the  one  that  followed.  Although  misunder- 
stood by  many  of  our  brethren,  God  had  spoken  to 
us  as  plainly  as  he  did  to  Abraham  when  he  called 
him  out  of  Ur  of  Chaldea  to  go  into  a  country  that 
he  knew  not.  And  he  promised  to  bless  them  that 
blessed  him  and  curse  them  that  cursed  him. 

Some  thought  it  the  height  of  folly  to  venture 
out  without  a  salary.  We  remained  at  Erie  nearly 
a  year,  going  from  there  into  evangelistic  work.  We 
had  our  greatest  results  from  meetings  held  in  school 
houses.  Here  the  people's  hearts  were  not  so  hard- 


STILL    FIGHTING    HOLINESS.  187 

ened  and  they  had  not  been  spoiled  with  mere  forms 
of  religion.  Persons  converted  in  these  meetings 
are  standing  to-day  in  the  holiness  movement  in 
Colorado. 

STILL  FIGHTING  HOLINESS. 

The  battle  against  holiness  was  still  going  on 
at  Erie.  They  sent  the  pastor  away  who  followed 
us,  and  now  had  a  pastor  who  was  a  Free  Mason 
and  were  exultant  over  their  apparent  victory.  He 
took  charge  of  the  work  in  June  and  on  the  Qth  of 
July  dropped  dead  at  the  home  of  one  of  his  mem- 
bers in  the  country. 

Up  until  the  time  of  his  death  I  was  in  igno- 
rance of  his  being  a  Free  Mason,  and  was  first  ap- 
prised of  it  when  I  saw  members  of  the  organiza- 
tion in  charge  of  his  body.  Ten  days  preceding  his 
death  I  attended  a  prayer  meeting  at  the  church. 
A  brother  in  a  boastful  spirit  told  of  a  certain  meet- 
ing where  the  pastor  was  present.  He  claimed  that 
the  presence  of  God  was  there.  I  supposed  it  was  a 
cottage  prayer  meeting,  and  never  knew  the  differ- 
ence until  after  the  preacher  was  dead,  when  I 
learned  that  it  was  a  lodge  meeting  and  that  the  re- 
marks of  this  brother  were  especially  for  my  benefit. 

The  lodge  devotee  is  very  sensitive  and  will 
fight  fiercely  for  his  order,  as  divine  and  all  sufficient, 
until  God  has  opened  his  eyes.  Dr.  Godbey  says 
that  the  lodge  is  the  "best  thing  the  sinner  has.  living 
in  the  land  of  Moab;  but  the  Christian,  living  in 
Canaan,  does  not  find  it  necessary  to  go  to  Moab  for 
fellowship  and  entertainment.  Persons  who  are  will- 
ing to  walk  in  the  light  soon  see  they  are  not  of  God. 


1 88  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

The  brethren  of  the  country  church  asked  the 
presiding  elder  to  send  Brother  I.  F.  McKay,  a  holi- 
ness man,  to  the  charge.  Before  preaching  a  ser- 
mon he  said,  "Sister  White,  these  holiness  fighters 
will  keep  me  about  a  month."  At  the  end  ol  theUrst 
month  he  was  dismissed  from  the  charge. 

The  next  man  to  come  was  one  who  at  some 
time  had  had  great  spiritual  light.  One  could  tell 
that  he  once  enjoyed  the  experience  of  sanctification. 
We  trembled  for  him  as  he  was  brought  face  to  face 
with  the  difficulties  on  this  charge.  His  place  was 
not  a  desirable  one  unless  he  was  ready  to  suffer  and 
be  sacrificed  with  the  rest  of  us.  All  eyes  were  upon 
him.  Would  he  lift  the  blood-stained  banner,  and 
preach  a  full  salvation  regardless  of  consequences, 
or  would  he  compromise?  He  was  a  middle-aged 
man,  formerly  a  presiding  elder,  with  a  brilliant 
mind  and  of  keen  discernment.  In  conversation 
with  him  we  recognized  his  executive  ability  and 
his  full  comprehension  of  the  situation,  over  whicn 
he  wept  and  prayed  with  us. 

After  attending  our  holiness  convention  at 
Longmont  he  confessed  to  us  that  he  had  never 
found  persons  who  were  straighter  in  doctrine  and 
who  had  been  more  grossly  misrepresented.  The 
fact  that  he  had  had  great  light  made  it  more  peril- 
ous for  him  to  compromise,  which  we  were  afraid 
he  would  do.  One  sister  on  whom  the  burden  was 
especially  laid,  accompanied  by  my  mother,  went  to 
his  home  and  in  a  spirit  of  love  gave  him  a  solemn 
warning.  He  immediately  secured  one  of  the  most 
spiritual  men  outside  of  the  holiness  ranks  to  assist 


LONGMONT   MEETING.  189 

him  in  a  revival.  Satan  appeared  as  an  angel  of 
light  with  the  argument  that  it  would  be  detrimental 
to  young  converts  to  preach  holiness  to  them  as  they 
must  be  fed  with  milk  and  not  with  meat. 

He  was  removed  at  the  end  of  the  conference 
year,  at  his  own  request,  and  died  in  a  few  weeks. 
A  short  time  before  his  death  he  wrote  to  us  request- 
ing the  prayers  of  the  holiness  people  for  his  healing, 
and  if  possible  for  one  or  both  of  us  to  come  and 
see  him,  but  if  not  to  send  the  sister  who  in  company 
with  my  mother  had  given  him  the  warning. 

TABERNACLE  MEETING  AT  LONGMONT. 

The  Lord  pjaced  a  burden  on  me  for  Long- 
mont,  a  town  of  twelve  hundred  inhabitants.  The 
churches  were  closed  against  holiness,  and  the  only 
possible  opening  was  to  get  the  city  hall  or  use  a 
gospel  tent.  On  the  train  I  met  Bro.  C.  Hill,  the 
Free  Methodist  pastor  of  that  place,  who  said  tha" 
the  Holy  Spirit  had  laid  it  on  his  heart  to  invite  me 
to  bring  our  gospel  tent  and  hold  a  meeting  for  them. 
He  had  made  a  final  test  by  asking  the  Lord  if  it 
were  His  will  to  let  him  see  me  that  morning.  The 
arrangements  were  made  and  the  meeting  opened 
the  latter  part  of  July  with  a  good  corps  of  workers. 

Brother  Hill  had  been  faithful  in  uncovering  sin 
and  preaching  a  full  gospel  and  his  little  band  was 
ready  for  work.  Brothers  G.  W.  Ray  and  I.  P. 
McKay  assisted  in  some  of  the  meetings. 

Open  air  meetings  were  held  every  evening  pre- 
ceding the  services.  Many  of  the  farmers  hitched 
their  teams  and  waited  until  the  service  was  over 


LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

before  returning  to  their  homes  at  night.  One  Sab- 
bath evening  the  presence  of  the  Spirit  was  power- 
fully felt  pleading  with  young  men  to  yield  to  God 
at  once.  Conviction  was  great,  but  there  was  no  re- 
sponse. The  next  day  six  of  them  were  badly  scalded 
by  an  explosion  of  the  boiler  in  a  canning  factory, 
one  of  them  fatally,  who  never  spoke  intelligently 
after  the  accident,  and  died  in  a  few  hours.  Hun- 
dreds heard  the  gospel  preached  as  they  had  never 
heard  it  before.  The  country  people  drove  in  for 
miles  to  attend  the  services. 

On  Sabbath  evenings  the  tent  was  full  and 
many  gathered  on  the  outside.  It  was  a  time  of  seed 
sowing  as  well  as  ingathering  of  some  souls.  We 
asked  the  Lord  for  two  hundred  souls,  and  while  we 
did  not  see  more  than  thirty  saved  and  sanctified 
at  that  time,  we  believe  we  shall  see  them  in  heaven ; 
for  almost  every  place  we  have  labored  in  the  state 
since  then  we  have  met  persons  who  were  convicted 
in  this  meeting  and  many  of  them  have  since  been 
brightly  converted. 

""AUNT  REBECCA/'' 

The  sainted  Rebecca  Grant,  a  colored  sister, 
camped  on  the  ground  and  with  her  prayers,  songs 
and  testimonies,  did  a  work  for  God  that  only  eter- 
nity will  reveal.  She  afterward  worked  in  our  Den- 
ver missions  and  other  places  where  there  were 
pressing  calls  for  her.  This  humble  sister  endeared 
herself  to  many  hearts.  She  was  a  servant  of  ser- 
vants, and  never  complained  in  any  suffering,  but 
gladly  and  silently  endured  hardships  for  the  good 


LONGMONT    MEETING. 

of  others  and  for  the  cause  of  her  blessed  Lord.  She 
was  given  to  much  fasting  and  prayer.  In  meet- 
ings her  dark  face  would  light  up  with  a  smile  and 
she  would  spe?k  with  great  unction  of  the  Spirit. 
Some  of  her  characteristic  remarks  were,  "Well, 
children,  de  blessed  Lord  is  right  in  my  soul  dis 
mornin' !  He  has  heard  my  prayers.  He  pity  dis 
poo'  old  colored  woman  and  had  mercy  on  her.  Oh, 
children,  but  1  love  Him !  O  glory !  He  never  will 
get  rid  of  me!"  Again  she  would  say,  "I^am_all 
dressed  urjjnj^sus.  I  am  the  king's  daughter;  my 
clothing  is  of  wrought  gold;  my  raiment  of  needle 
work."  Speaking  of  Jesus,  she  would  call  Him  in 
the  greatest  delight,  her  Ishi.  When  the  brethren 
would  talk  about  Jesus  in  class  meeting,  she  would 
shout  out,  "Talk  about  Him,  children!  Talk  about 
Him !"  No  matter  how  indifferent  an  audience 
might  be  to  some  speakers,  unusual  interest  was  al- 
ways manifest  when  she  spoke. 

Many  persons  in  trouble  sought  Aunt  Rebecca's 
little  home  in  the  outskirts  of  Denver,  and  would  re- 
sort to  her  tent  on  camp  grounds  where  Cod's  com- 
forting, saving  and  sanctifying  grace  came  down. 
La'tely,  God  called  her  home  after  sever?!  days  of 
great  suffering,  in  which  she  was  fully  resigned, 
often  saying  "Lam  ready;  please  Jesus  take  me." 
Several  hundred  persons  attended  her  funeral,  where 
the  Spirit  of  God  was  blessedly  manifest.  Saints 
wept  and  shouted  for  joy,  and  sinners  trembled  and 
tvrr;ed  to  the  Savior. 

Our  camp  meeting  followed  at  Fort  Collins. 
There  were  perhaps  thirty-five  hundred  people  on 


LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

the  ground  the  last  Sabbath,  who  heard  the  preach- 
ing of  a  full  gospel.  They  often  asked  "Is  this  a 
new  doctrine?"  Truly  holiness  was  being  preached 
on  virgin  soil,  yet  there  was  no  lack  of  churches  or 
of  that  class  of  people  called  Methodists,  whose  bus- 
iness, John  Wesley  said,  was  to  raise  up  a  holy 
people. 

The  old  fair  ground  was  used  for  the  encamp- 
ment, about  one  and  one-half  miles  from  town. 
Large  numbers  of  unsaved  people  would  come  out 
of  evenings,  mostly  from  curiosity.  Many  were  con- 
victed and  converted,  and  quite  a  number  left  the 
grounds  rejoicing.  A  farmer,  living  near  by,  was 
present  several  evenings,  and  a  number  of  the  preach- 
ers and  missionaries  talked  to  him  about  his  soul. 
The  last  service  he  attended  four  different  persons 
pleaded  with  him  to  yield  to  God,  but  he  stoutly  re- 
sisted, telling  them  he  did  not  believe  in  hell,  claim- 
ing to  be  an  honest  man,  treating  his  neighbors 
right,  etc.  He  declared  he  would  stand  his  chances 
with  the  rest  of  them.  The  next  morning  he  was 
found  a  few  hundred  yards  from  the  camp  ground 
in  an  unconscious  condition.  He  died  a  most  hor- 
rible death  a  few  days  later.  His  face  was  bruised, 
but  his  friends  were  not  able  to  ascertain  the  cause. 
I  visited  the  sick  room  in  company  with  a  woman 
who  had  spoken  to  him  about  his  soul  the  night  be- 
fore the  accident.  We  tried  to  pray,  but  our  mouths 
were  closed.  It  looked  like  demons  from  the  pit 
were  in  possession  of  his  soul;  we  felt  their  power 
and  left  the  room.  It  was  too  late. 


CHAPTER  XV. 

BOX   ELDER,    BLACK   HOLLOW    AND   OTHER   REVIVALS. 

From  this  place  we  were  called  to  Box  Elder,  a 
rich  farming  community,  to  hold  a  meeting  in  a 
school  house.  One  of  the  leading  men  of  the  neigh- 
borhood, at  whose  home  we  were  entertained, 
brought  his  carriage  to  the  railroad  station  for  us. 
On  the  way  he  told  us  he  had  attended  the  camp 
meeting  on  purpose  to  find  out  if  the  people  that 
professed  holiness  had  anything  more  than  he  had. 
After  a  thorough  investigation  he  decided  that  they 
did  not,  and  he  never  had  any  second  work  of  grace 
either.  We  knew  that  he  was  numbered  with  thou- 
sands of  others  that  were  deluded  by  the  devil  and 
that  in  all  probability  he  would  be  a  hindrance  to  the 
meeting  and  to  his  family  of  grown  up  sons  and 
daughters. 

Before  our  arrival,  a  worldly  young  man,  en- 
gaged to  one  of  his  daughters,  was  brought  from 
the  harvest  field  sick.  We  were  at  the  home  three 
days  before  we  were  invited  to  see  him,  he  having 
requested  that  we  be  kept  away,  as  he  did  not  want 
to  be  talked  to  about  his  soul.  Finally  our  host,  not 
thinking  it  looked  well,  asked  us  to  come  to  his  room 
for  prayers.  He  was  very  stubborn  and  kept  his 
hand  over  his  eyes.  When  about  to  leave  the  room  I 
was  moved  of  the  Spirit  to  go  back  to  his  bedside 


194  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

and  tell  him  not  to  be  afraid  of  us,  that  we  would  not 
try  to  force  him  to  accept  salvation ;  that  Jesus  would 
not  do  that,  promising  also  that  we  would  not  in- 
trude again  unless  he  wished  to  see  us.  I  believed 
that  the  Lord  would  work  with  him  as  well  as  his 
affianced,  who  was  as  indifferent  as  himself. 

Gospel  messages  were  given  "not  in  word  only, 
but  also  in  power,  and  in  the  Holy  Ghost,  and  in 
much  assurance."  (I.  Thess.  1 15.)  After  about  ten 
days  the  break  came  and  fully  thirty  persons  re- 
sponded to  the  altar  call.  Three  days  later,  when 
the  smoke  of  battle  had  somewhat  cleared  away,  the 
thrilling  testimonies  and  shining  faces  gave  evidence 
that  a  genuine  work  had  been  done  in  their  hearts. 
Some  were  testifying  to  sanctification  'as  a  second 
work,  when  our  host  arose  and  began  to  talk  against 
it.  It  was  like  throwing  a  wet  blanket  over  a  flame. 
The  young  man  was  no  better,  and  we  were  glad 
when  the  services  of  this  brother  were  needed  at  the 
bedside  and  he  was  thereby  kept  from  the  meetings. 

On  the  last  Sabbath  afternoon  there  were  thirty- 
five  at  the  altar;  some  had  never  been  there  before, 
others  were  new  converts  seeking  a  clean  heart.  The 
meeting  lasted  for  hours,  and  in  their  earnestness 
they  forgot  the  time.  The  scene  became  more  in- 
teresting when  mothers  and  fathers  with  their  chil- 
dren wept  their  way  to  the  cross.  About  seventy 
persons  came  into  the  light  of  salvation  in  our  meet- 
ings at  this  place.  They  formed  a  class  and  have  had 
a  pastor  ever  since. 

Some  time  before  one  of  these  families  lost 
three  children  and  a  brother  of  the  mother  bv  drown- 


BOX  ELDER.  195 

ing  in  the  lake  near  their  home.  The  children  were 
dressed  for  Sunday  School,  when  an  uncle,  with 
another  young  man,  a  friend  of  his,  drove  up  to  the 
gate.  They  insisted  on  the  children  and  their  father 
going  with  them  for  a  boat  ride.  As  they  were 
ready  for  Sunday  School,  it  was  with  some  reluct- 
ance that  the  father  consented.  The  children  were 
delighted.  When  the  boat  was  about  ten  feet  from 
the  shore  it  capsized  and  all  were  thrown  into  the 
water.  After  a  desperate  struggle  the  father  escaped 
with  the  youngest  child  in  his  arms,  the  other  chil- 
dren and  the  two  young  men  were  drowned.  It  was 
supposed  that  the  young  men's  feet  caught  in  barbed 
wire  at  the  bottom  of  the  lake.  In  this  father's  tes- 
timony he  said  that  he  had  been  a  Christian  before 
and  when  living  close  to  God  had  always  prayed 
that  if  he  should  ever  backslide  that  He  would  bring 
him  back  at  any  cost,  then  added  with  great  emO' 
tion,  "My  prayer  has  been  answered  at  an  awful 
cost."  His  wife,  grieving  for  her  children,  fell  away 
to  a  mere  skeleton.  Some  of  her  relatives,  especially 
one  sister,  severely  censured  him  for  not  saving  the 
other  children.  This  woman  had  one  child  of  her 
own  who  was  in  the  habit  of  playing  about  the  door. 
One  day  it  was  missing  and,  almost  frantic,  she  be- 
gan to  search  and  found  it  drowned  in  a  ditch  near 
by.  When  God  sees  fit  to  inflict  punishment  we 
should  lay  our  mouths  in  the  dust  lest  the  strokes  fall 
on  us. 

As  the  young  man  was  growing  worse  it  was 
thought  best  that  the  family  be  relieved  of  the  bur- 
den of  our  entertainment.  As  we  left  the  door  that 


196  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUL,AH. 

day  I  was  impressed  with  the  truth  that  if  he  recov- 
ered at  all  it  would  be  a  narrow  escape,  and  I  knew 
that  he  would  send  for  us  before  any  crisis  came. 
Two  or  three  days  later  we  went  back  at  his  request 
to  pray  with  him.  As  he  extended  his  hand  he  said, 
"Everything  is  against  me;  I  might  just  as  well  give 
up.  Please  pray  for  me."  In  less  than  three  quar- 
ters of  an  hour  he  was  gloriously  converted,  after 
which  he  begged  his  betrothed  to  give  her  heart  to 
God  also.  On  this  day  several  hundred  miles  away 
there  was  a  prayer  scene  in  his  old  home  where  his 
mother  and  some  friends  were  wrestling  with  God 
for  his  salvation.  He  lived  a  few  days  after  this. 
Just  before  passing  away  1-"-  asked  them  to  sing 
"Jesus  Lover  of  My  Soul."  This  young  man  had 
great  influence  over  the  young  people  in  the  commu- 
nity, and  it  was  believed  that,  had  he  not  been  on  a 
sick  bed,  he  would  have  kept  many  of  them  from  giv- 
ing their  hearts  to  God.  The  mother  and  two  daugh- 
ters in  this  home  were  stricken  down  with  the  same 
disease,  the  former  dying  six  weeks  after  the  close 
of  our  meeting.  We  visited  the  neighborhood  and 
held  a  few  services  before  the  young  ladies  had  fulh 
recovered.  One  took  a  relapse  and  kept  her  bed 
until  late  in  the  winter. 

We  never  learned  what  the  doctor  bills  amount- 
ed to  during  these  months  of  sickness  and  death, 
but  it  must  have  been  a  great  deal,  for  the  physician 
had  to  drive  about  fourteen  miles  every  trip  he 
made.  Our  brother  with  the  Zinzendorfian  idea 
of  getting  it  all  at  conversion,  had  his  heart  set 
on  the  things  of  the  world.  God  knows  where  to 


BOX  ELDER.  197 

put  His  hand, when  the  heart  is  not  right.  "It  is  a 
fearful  thing  to  fall  into  the  hands  of  the  living 
God,"  but  it  is  better  to  suffer  chastisement,  how- 
ever severe,  than  to  be  left  to  the  ravages  of  the 
wicked  one.  "Whom  the  Lord  loveth  He  chasteneth." 

The  following  is  a  copy  of  the  letter  written 
by  the  mother  of  the  young  man  above  referred  to : 

"My  Darling  Boy :  I  was  glad  to  hear  from 
you,  but  sorry  to  hear  of  your  sickness.  Hope  you 
are  better.  Was  greatly  rejoiced  to  learn  that  you 
had  enlisted  as  a  soldier  for  Jesus.  It  may  be 
strange  to  you  but  I  was  not  very  much  surprised. 

"The  8th,  the  same  day  you  were  converted, 
Bro.  and  Sister  S were  here  when  we  were  hav- 
ing worship.  Sister  S prayed  for  you,  and  of 

course  I  was  praying,  for  I  was  feeling  very  bad. 
I  stayed  on  my  knees  quite  a  while  after  the  rest 
got  up,  and  the  Lord  so  wonderfully  blessed  me  I 
could  hardly  tell  just  what  it  was,  but  I  knew  that 
you  would  be  saved  and  the  angels  were  rejoicing 
over  a  sinner  coming  to  God  and  my  heart  was  filled 
with  joy  and  gratitude. 

"Last  night,  after  hearing  of  your  conversion,  I 
rejoiced  and  praised  God  nearly  all  night.  Bless 
His  name.  Now  Charlie  be  true.  It  is  so  hard  to 
have  you  sick  away  from  home,  and  mother  some- 
times thinks  she  can't  stay  away  from  her  boy.  With 
many  kisses  to  my  darling.  Good  bye. 

"YOUR  MOTHER." 

Then  the  father  enclosed  a  letter  expressing 
thanksgiving  at  his  conversion,  with  an  exhortation 
to  be  faithful. 


IQ8  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

To-day  the  peaks  of  the  Rocky  Mountains  stand 
on  the  West  above  his  grave  as  white  robed  senti- 
nels, and  will  guard  the  grave  of  the  sleeper  until  the 
Christ  of  the  resurrection  comes  in  the  East  and  re- 
leases them  of  their  vigil. 

One  evening  in  the  above  meeting  as  I  prayed 
the  Spirit  came  upon  me  in  mighty  power.  A  man 
came  and  asked  us  to  visit  him  at  his  home  several 
miles  away,  adding  that  he  could  not  understand 
why  we  would  be  working  as  we  were  and  making 
such  sacrifices  if  there  was  nothing  in  religion.  He 
said  he  was  an  infidel,  and  we  found  he  was  living 
in  a  nest  of  them  in  his  part  of  the  community.  He 
told  us  his  father  was  a  preacher,  that  he  had  be- 
longed to  the  Presbyterian  church  himself,  but  found 
nothing  in  religion  and  withdrew  from  the  church. 
We  went  to  see  him  the  next  day.  We  told  him 
we  did  not  come  to  go  over  the  grounds  of  infidelity 
with  him,  as  he  desired  us  to,  but  would  say  to  him 
that  if  he  would  seek  God  with  all  his  heart,  He 
would  be  found  of  him.  (Jer.  29:13.)  He  said 
he  had  no  faith,  that  he  could  not  believe,  etc.  He 
was  told  just  to  seek  God,  to  be  honest  about  it, 
not  to  be  ashamed  to  make  a  public  effort,  and  go  to 
praying.  He  was  held  right  to  this  and  that  night 
after  being  talked  with  personally,  he  went  forward 
to  the  altar.  There  was  no  expression  of  feeling  or 
conviction  about  him,  but  cold  and  professing  to 
have  no  faith,  he  said  he  would  go  forward  on  our 
word  as  an  honest  man  desiring  the  truth.  After 
he  had  knelt  a  few  minutes  at  the  altar,  he  arose, 


BLACK  HOLLOW  REVIVAL.  1 99 

turned  to  the  audience,  and  said :  "I  have  ten  times 
the  faith  I  had  when  I  came  here"  and  business-like 
he  knelt  and  continued  praying.  We  found  him  the 
next  day  under  such  conviction  that  he  had  quit 
work.  We  knelt  and  prayed  together  in  his  home. 
In  his  effort  to  pray  aloud  he  threw  up  his  hands 
and  began  to  laugh.  The  Spirit  of  God  had  touched 
him  and  he  was  a  new  creature.  This  was  about 
the  middle  of  the  week.  The  next  Sunday  evening 
he  arose  in  the  Amen  corner  of  the  building,  weep- 
ing, and  said  "I  did  not  know  that  God  Almighty 
had  such  a  blessing  for  a  human  being  as  T  received 
the  past  week."  Then  he  told  about  his  conversion. 
This  brother  is  now  preaching  the  Gospel. 

THE  BLACK  HOLLOW  REVIVAL. 

After  returning  home  to  rest  a  few  days,  we 
went  back  to  commence  a  meeting  in  an  adjoining 
neighborhood.  It  was  in  one  corner  of  the  famous 
potato  district.  At  nearly  every  farm  house  men  and 
women  were  working  early  and  late.  There  were 
only  a  few  out  at  the  first  two  services.  My  hus- 
band became  discouraged  with  the  outlook  and  said 
we  had  better  close  the  meeting  and  come  again  at 
a  better  time.  I  had  great  victory  in  my  soul  for 
the  meeting  before  leaving  home,  and  was  positive 
God  .had  led  us  thus  far.  Believing  that  the  Spirit 
would  be  grieved  by  giving  up  without  further  trial, 
we  proposed  to  stay  until  it  was  clear  that  the  Lord 
was  through  with  us.  Seeing  our  purpose,  several 
persons  manifested  a  disposition  to  co-operate. 

One  evening  after  school  hours  we  were  driving 


2OO  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


past  the  school  house  and  went  in  where  we  could 
be  alone  to  pray.  We'  had  been  driving  in  the  cold 
winds,  and  sleeping  in  cold  rooms,  which  I  was  not 
accustomed  to,  and  while  on  my  knees  I  took  a  chill 
which  was  followed  by  a  fever,  and  I  was  unable  to 
attend  the  services  that  night.  By  the  next  morn- 
ing all  the  symptoms  of  pneumonia  were  developed. 
My  husband  and  the  family  where  we  were  being 
entertained  said  that  a  physician  must  be  called,  to 
which  my  consent  was  not  given. 

Our  hostess  had  become  so  interested  in  the 
subject  of  sanctification  that  she  persisted  in  asking 
me  questions  about  it  even  when  I  was  suffering  the 
most.  She  and  her  husband  had  been  Christians  for 
years,  but  had  never  heard  this  doctrine  preached  be- 
fore. The  pain  in  my  body  became  so  great  that  I 
groaned  aloud.  My  husband  told  the  family  in  an 
adjoining  room  that  I  had  been  healed  many,  times 
before  in  answer  to  prayer,  and  asked  them  to  come 
in  and  unite  with  him  in  my  behalf.  He  poured 
out  his  soul  to  God  for  my  healing,  but  our  hostess 
cried  to  the  Lord  to  sanctify  her  soul.  When  she 
was  through  the  Holy  Spirit  came  mightily  upon 
me,  and  lifting  my  head  from  the  pillow  I  prayed 
not  only  for  her  sanctification  but  for  the  salvation 
of  the  whole  community.  The  pain  all  left  me  and 
the  perspiration  stood  on  my  forehead.  No  one 
could  doubt  that  the  Lord  had  healed  me.  Some- 
time during  the  following  night  the  sister  received 
the  witness  to  her  sanctification,  and  the  next  morn- 
ing her  face  fairly  shone  as  she  prayed,  all  on  fire, 
for  her  family  and  others.  The  daughters  began  to 


BLACK  HOLLOW  REVIVAL.  201 

pray,  "O  God,  give  me  what  mother's  got;  give  me 
what  mother's  got."  The  oldest  daughter  soon  re- 
ceived "the  blessing." 

The  news  went  forth  the  next  day  that  I  was 
healed  and  would  be  at  the  meeting  that  night.  The 
house  was  full  to  overflowing.  The  power  of  the 
Spirit  was  in  the  word  spoken.  When  the  altar  call 
was  made,  a  son-in-law  of  the  family  with  whom  we 
were  stopping,  sitting  in  a  back  seat,  cried  out  "I 
can't  stand  it  any  longer,"  and  started  for  the  altar. 
He  had  only  gone  a  few  steps  when  his  soul  was 
liberated  and  he  shouted  for  joy.  The  people  had 
never  seen  anything  like  this  and  through  curiosity 
the  potato  diggers  left  their  fields  to  come  to  the 
services.  The  revival  swept  on  until  the  card  parties 
and  dancing  circles  were  broken  up. 

While  bowing  at  the  family  altar  one  morning, 
we  were  trying  to  lead  another  of  the  daughters  of 
the  above  named  family  into  the  experience  of  holi- 
ness by  telling  her  to  "reckon  herself  dead  indeed 
unto  sin."  (Rom.  6:11.)  The  father  apparently 
had  been  doing  a  good  deal  of  thinking  but  was 
very  quiet  until  this  time.  As  the  steps  of  conse- 
cration were  being  taken  not  a  word  was  said  to 
him,  when  he  cried  out  "I  see  it,  I  see  it."  He 
sprang  into  the  air  with  a  shout  that  startled  every 
one  from  their  knees;  he  caught  the  babe  in  his 
arms  and  tossed  it  to  the  ceiling,  saying,  "I  never 
loved  you  as  I  do  now,"  then  hugged  and  kissed 
the  whole  family.  Since  this  his  shouts  and  testi- 
monies have  often  been  heard  and  enjoyed  at  the 
annual  camp  meetings. 


2O2  LOOKING    BACK    FROM    BEUL,AH. 

An  old  brother  who  had  been  in  a  backslidden 
state  for  many  years  lived  near.  He  avoided  any 
conversation  about  his  soul,  but  was  very  talkative 
on  other  subjects:  We  had  never  seen  a  greater 
slave  to  tobacco  than  he  was.  He  was  hedged  in 
until  there  was  apparently  no  way  to  get  at  him, 
and  I  became  so  burdened  for  his  soul  one  night 
that  I  could  not  sleep.  His  white  head  and  face 
were  continually  before  me.  We  went  to  his  house 
the  second  time  and  succeeded  in  getting  him  upon 
his  knees.  At  first  he  would  not  pray,  but  after 
much  solicitation  he  called  on  God  to  have  mercy 
upon  him.  The  Spirit  interceded  with  groanings 
that  could  not  be  uttered,  when  presently  his  prayer 
was  turned  into  praise.  He  sang: 

"  'Tis  done,  the  great  transaction's  done ; 
I  am  the  Lord's  and  He  is  mine." 

Ten  days  later  he  was  seeking  sanctification  and 
after  struggling  over  his  pipe  he  gave  it  up  and  re- 
ceived "the  blessing."  He  cried  out  at  the  altar, 
"Lord,  I  give  it  up,  I  give  it  up,"  and  the  victory 
was  won.  During  five  years  this  brother  has  re- 
mained true  to  God  and  has  been  the  means  of  lead- 
ing his  companion  to  the  Lord. 

The  work  of  grace  did  not  stop  in  this  commu- 
nity after  the  meetings  closed.  A  week  or  two  later 
a  man  who  was  considered  one  of  the  hardest  sinners 
in  the  place,  was  converted  while  riding  along  the 
road.  We  labored  here  just  three  wreeks  and  closed 
after  seeing  many  old-time  conversions  and  a  num- 
ber of  persons  clearly  sanctified.  It  was  a  notable 
fact  that  the  work  done  in  country  school  houses  and 


HOLYOKE.  2O3 

out  of  the  way  places  always  stood,  but  lambs  left 
in  a  fallen  church  were  devoured  by  wolves. 

After  this  meeting  my  husband  went  to  help 
the  M.  E.  pastor  at  Windsor,  where  God  gave  a  re- 
vival. I  went  to  assist  my  brother,  C.  W.  Bridwell, 
at  Holyoke,  Colo.  The  following  is  an  article  he 
wrote  to  the  Christian  Witness: 

"The  Lord  has  been  pouring  out  His  Spirit  on 
our  people  in  great  measure.  The  entire  community 
has  been  stirrqd  as  never  before  in  its  history.  Sin- 
ners have  been  converted;  believers  sanctified  and 
the  church  lifted  up  out  of  the  ruts.  Special  ser- 
vices were  begun  November  the  i6th  and  concluded 
after  three  weeks  of  hard  labor.  My  sister,  Mrs. 
Kent  White,  had  the  meeting  in  charge.  She 
preached  under  the  power  of  the  Spirit  and  the 
altar  was  crowded  with  seekers  from  night  to  night. 
It  was  an  occasion  of  much  joy  when  all  classes  were 
seen  coming  forward  with  one  accord  and  calling  on 
God  for  salvation.  The  church  was  filled  night  after 
night  with  eager  crowds.  Some  of  the  principal  busi- 
ness and  professional  men  were  reached  and  saved. 
Prodigals  who  had  been  away  from  their  father's 
house  for  many  years  came  back  and  received  the 
kiss  of  reconciliation.  It  was  wonderful  to  see  the 
shining  faces  and  hear  the  thrilling  testimonies.  Di- 
vine love  has  taken  the  place  of  envy  and  strife  in  the 
hearts  of  certain  individuals.  Family  altars  have  been 
erected.  A  few  months  ago,  when  I  became  pastor, 
there  was  much  opposition  to  the  doctrine  of  sanc- 
tification,  but  constant  teaching  under  the  guidance 
of  the  Spirit  has  swept  away  much  of  it,  and  now 


2O4  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

living  testimonies  form  an  argument  which  opposers 
can  neither  gainsay  nor  resist.  The  people 
are  hungry  for  holiness  literature  and  many 
books  have  been  sold.  One  young  man  who  had 
come  home  from  college  on  his  vacation  was 
convicted  of  imbred  sin  and  has  since  ded- 
icated his  life  to  the  ministry." 

We  reached  home  in  time  for  the  holidays, 
within  three  months  there  had  been  four  meetings 
held  with  over  two  hundred  conversions  and  sanc- 
tifications.  In  the  latter  part  of  the  winter  we  held 
two  meetings  in  school  houses  where  several  young 
people  were  converted  who  have  since  been  called 
to  the  Lord's  work,  among  them  Sister  Delia  Huff- 
man, a  farmer's  daughter,  who  has  since  proved  one 
of  our  most  efficient  workers. 


CHAPTER  XVI. 

THE  OPENING  OF  THE  PENTECOSTAL  MISSION. 

On  visiting  Denver  a  few  weeks  before  we 
moved  to  the  city,  I  found  the  banner  of  holiness 
was  lowered  in  the  Hay  Market  Mission,  where  it 
was  once  honored.  Instead  of  preaching  sanctifica- 
tion,  persons  were  employed  to  fill  the  pulpit  who 
were  fighting  it.  Those  who  once  had  liberty 
in  preaching  and  testifying  were  now  held  back.  The 
superintendent  asked  me  to  speak  for  them  the  next 
evening.  Awakening  at  three  o'clock  the  following 
morning  I  had  Acts  19:2  on  my  lips,  "Have  ye  re- 
ceived the  Holy  Ghost  since  ye  believed?"  I  was 
so  burdened  during  the  day  that  I  was  unfit  for  the 
business  that  I  had  to  attend  to.  Sanctification  as 
a  second  work  of  grace,  and  the  importance  of  defi- 
nite testimony,  burned  like  a  fire  in  my  breast.  I 
knew  something  was  coming,  for  I  fairly  trembled 
under  my  load  all  day.  My  soul  was  suffering  the 
real  birth  pangs  of  a  new  work  which  began  with 
this  message.  On  reaching  the  hall  a  little  early  I 
walked  back  to  Sixteenth  street  and  around  the 
block.  There  were  broken  cisterns  that  could  hold 
no  water  in  every  direction.  I  asked  the  Lord  to 
open  an  artesian  well  of  salvation  in  the  heart  of 
the  city  where  famishing  multitudes  might  quench 
their  thirst.  On  returning  to  the  hall  I  found  the 
congregation  had  gathered  and  the  superintendent 

205 


2O6  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUL,AH. 

beckoned  me  to  the  platform.  After  reading  the 
scripture  lesson  there  was  a  slight  struggle  for  lib- 
erty, when  my  soul  broke  through  amidst  the  shouts 
and  amens  of  the  people.  The  sword  of  truth  was 
unsheathed.  Forty  minutes  quickly  passed.  When 
the  altar  call  was  made,  there  was  a  rush  in  two 
directions — some  to  the  front  and  others  to  the 
door.  The  assistant  superintendent  stood  near  the 
door  to  comfort  those  whose  idols  had  been  discov- 
ered and  otherwise  smarting  under  the  truth.  The 
leader  on  the  platform  looked  like  a  pouting  child. 

Soon  there  were  shouts  of  deliverance  from 
seekers  at  the  altar.  A  Presbyterian  minister  in  the 
congregation  took  my  hand  and  said,  "God  bless 
you,  preach  on ;  it  is  the  truth." 

The  leader  said  he  did  not  wish  to  criticise  me, 
but  he  did  not  think  it  necessary  to  use  the  word 
sanctification,  as  it  aroused  so  much  opposition.  He 
stated  that  there  were  other  terms  that  could  be  used 
which  would  not  offend  the  people.  He  said  the 
folks  down  in  New  York  called  it,  "the  infilling  of 
the  Holy  Ghost,"  and  that  he  had  adopted  the  same 
term.  I  did  not  know  until  several  weeks  after  that  I 
was  on  trial  in  this  service,  it  being  under  considera- 
tion we  were  told,  whether  my  husband  and  I  should 
be  employed  as  assistants  in  the  mission,  but  this 
meeting  spoiled  it  all  and  the  victory  was  won  for 
holiness.  Two  years  before  the  Lord  gave  me  Psalms 
121:8:  "The  Lord  shall  preserve  thy  going  out 
and  thy  coming  in  from  this  time  forth  and  even 
forevermore." 

My  mother  was  in  Denver  on  a  visit.     She  de- 


OPENING  IN   DENVER.  2O/ 

cicled  to  stay,  and  rented  furnished  rooms,  which 
was  additional  evidence  that  we  were  to  follow.  For 
two  years,  when  we  were  absent  in  the  work,  she 
kept  the  children,  but  now  felt  that  the  responsibility 
was  lifted. 

We  were  without  any  visible  support,  and  to 
move  into  the  city  was  quite  a  step  of  faith  and  must 
be  clearly  known  to  be  the  will  and  leadings  of  God. 
It  meant  more  than  double  our  house  rent  and  fuel 
bill  and  general  expenses.  All  of  which  was  duly 
weighed  and  critically  considered  by  my  husband. 
He  was  a  good  manager  but  seemed  to  be  over-cau- 
tious and  hesitated  until  I  began  to  take  the  pictures 
from  the  wall  and  pile  them  on  the  floor,  for  I  had 
settled  the  matter  on  my  knees  and  knew  that  God 
would  supply  our  needs.  He  wrongly  held  back 
some  he  afterwards  confessed,  to  see  how  strong  my 
conviction  was — believing  himself  God  wanted  us 
in  Denver.  He  dreaded  ^a  day  or  two  of 
house  hunting,  and  being  brought  up  in  the  coun- 
try was  distressed  with  the  thought  of  being  cooped 
up  between  houses  with  no  room.  In  the  burden  of 
the  undertaking  I  even  prayed  that  the  first  house 
shown  us  for  rent  might  be  the  place  God  had  for 
us,  and  had  the  assurance  that  it  would  be  so.  I 
went  ahead  with  the  thought  of  looking  for  a  house. 
Starting  twice  to  the  rental  offices  I  was  consciously 
stopped  by  the  Spirit  and  given  to  understand  I 
must  wait.  Mr.  White  was  left  to  pack  and  ship 
the  goods.  When  he  came  we  went  into  that  part 
of  the  city,  where  we  were  impressed  we  were  to 
live  and  were  shown  a  house,  suitable  in  size,  with  a 


208  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

large  yard  and  a  rear  gate  opening  into  Lincoln 
Park.  There  were  large  double  parlors,  just  the 
place  for  a  weekly  holiness  meeting.  As  this  was 
thought  of,  the  blessing  of  God  came  upon  my  soul 
and  I  said  "this  is  the  place."  We  thought,  at  first, 
of  nothing  but  the  price,  which  was  a  third  more 
than  we  calculated  to  pay,  and  how  to  manage  this, 
with  the  extra  expense  of  living,  we  did  not  know. 
Making  a  final  test  we  asked  the  Lord  that  the  rent 
might  be  reduced  if  it  were  His  will  that  we  take 
this  house.  It  was  secured  for  one  dollar  less,  and 
in  a  few  hours  the  household  goods  were  transferred 
by  a  brother  free  of  charge. 

The  railroad  company  made  a  mistake,  in  our 
favor,  in  weighing  our  car  of  household  goods  and 
the  freight  bill  was  small.  Wher  their  attention  was 
called  to  it,  they  said  the  weight  was  official  and 
could  not  be  changed,  and  smilingly  added  that  it 
was  our  gain  and  their  loss.  God's  hand  was  in  all 
these  little  things — in  the  moving,  and  in  the  first 
house  shown  us  with  its  arrangements  and  surround- 
ings. The  knowledge  of  this  gave  us  courage  and 
strength  for  the  work  ahead  of  us. 

Two  weeks  after  we  were  settled,  the  Thursday 
afternoon  holiness  meeting  was  started  in  the  large 
double  parlors  of  our  home.  The  most  spiritual 
people  of  the  city  attended.  It  was  like  an  oasis  in 
the  desert.  There  have  been  conversions,  sanctifi- 
cations  and  many  remarkable  cases  of  healing  in 
these  meetings.  Some  of  the  regular  attendants  have 
passed  away  in  the  most  triumphant  faith.  Services 


OPENING  IN   DENVER.  2O9 

held  on  holidays  have  been  special  seasons  of  re- 
freshing. 

A  place  was  opened  for  Sunday  afternoon  holi- 
ness meetings  near  the  center  of  the  city,  in  a  side' 
room  of  the  Haymarket  Mission.  We  only  met  there 
a  few  times,  however,  when  the  superintendent  of 
that  work  said  we  must  find  another  place,  as  he  did 
not  care  to  have  his  folks  attend  our  meetings,  claim- 
ing they  were  tired  and  needed  to  rest  and  be  ready 
for  the  night  services.  At  the  last  service  in  this 
hall  a  large  gospel  tent  was  offered  us  for  gospel 
work.  The  next  thing  was  to  find  a  suit- 
able location  near  the  center  of  the  city 
where  the  services  could  be  preceded  by  open  air 
meetings.  We  were  led  definitely  to  the  house  and 
I  believed  the  Holy  Spirit  would  direct  to  the  very 
spot  where  this  tabernacle  was  to  be  erected.  While 
waiting  upon  God  I  was  impressed  to  ask  my  hus- 
band to  go  to  Twentieth  and  Arapahoe  streets  and 
see  if  there  were  not  some  vacant  lots  in  that  vicin- 
ity. Here  they  were  found  less  than  a  half  a  block 
from  the  corner.  The  ground  was  secured  free  of 
charge  on  which  the  tent  was  erected. 

On  June  the  i6th  the  first  meeting  was  held. 
From  night  to  night  the  altars  were  filled  with  seek- 
ers and  the  attendance  increased.  Hard-hearted  men 
and  women  wept  their  way  to  the  cross  and  when 
delivered  from  their  sins  often  shouted  uproariously. 
With  Mother  Vorn  Holtz  we  soon  had  help  enough 
to  conduct  two  meetings.  The  business  men  were 
often  stirred  by  persons  calling  upon  them  to  make 
restitution  for  wrong  business  transactions,  theft,. 


2IO  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUL,AH. 

etc.     In  every  case  they  were   forgiven  by  those 
whom  they  had  wronged. 

We  lived  at  the  north  end  of  Lincoln  Park, 
where  great  multitudes  gathered  on  the  Sabbath. 
We  very  much  desired  to  preach  to  the  people  in 
this  park  if  the  way  could  be  opened.  With  great 
travail  of  soul  upon  me  I  asked  my  husband  to  see 
the  city  commissioners  and  find  out  if  permission 
could  be  had  to  hold  services  there.  I  continued  in 
prayer  and  was  still  more  impressed  that  some  action 
must  be  taken  at  once  or  souls  would  be  lost  that 
we  might  possibly  reach.  The  hand  of  God  was 
upon  me  for  some  purpose.  My  husband  said  that 
there  had  been  a  city  ordinance  passed  that  no  re- 
ligious services  were  to  be  held  in  the  parks,  and 
therefore  thought  it  useless  to  make  an  effort  of  the 
kind.  I  went  away  alone  to  pray  and  returned  with 
a  still  greater  burden.  My  husband,  seeing  my  tears, 
consented  to  go  and  see  the  commissioners  whether 
anything  was  accomplished  or  not.  I  went  with  him 
and  it  proved  just  as  he  had  said — nothing  could 
be  done.  As  we  left  the  office  he  asked,  where  next  ? 
I  told  him  I  would  go  up  to  the  gospel  tabernacle 
to  pray  and  he  could  do  as  he  liked.  I  had  gone 
only  a  few  steps  when  some  one  spoke  to  me.  I  was 
wondering  what  this  peculiar  burden  meant,  and 
could  hardly  collect  my  thoughts  long  enough  to  see 
where  the  voice  came  from.  At  this  moment  a 
brother  whom  I  had  met  two  years  before  at  our 
first  camp  meeting,  stepped  to  my  side.  After  in- 
quiring about  the  success  of  our  work,  he  said  he 
had  just  rented  a  building  near  Seventeenth  and 


OPENING  IN   DENVER.  211 

Market  streets,  for  his  business,  and  that  he  did 
not  need  the  second  floor  and  wanted  a  mission 
opened  there.  Still  absorbed,  I  did  not  catch  his 
words  until  they  were  repeated.  I  told  him  we  would 
need  such  a  place  when  the  weather  got  too  cold  for 
our  tabernacle.  He  asked,  "Why  not  take  this  now?" 
I  told  him  we  could  not  pay  the  rent.  He  said, 
"Never  mind  about  that,  I  will  take  the  Lord  for.it." 
It  flashed  upon  me  that  this  was  the  explanation  of 
my  burden. 

The  place  was  taken  and  seated  with  benches 
made  of  plain  lumber.  Mother  Vorn  Holtz,  assisted 
by  others,  was  put  in  charge.  Previous  to  this  it 
was  well  known  as  the  old  "Buckeye  Gambling 
Hall;"  now  it  became  a  "Peniel"  of  prevailing 
prayer,  and  in  seven  weeks  time  there  were  two  hun- 
dred and  twenty-five  that  professed  salvation  at  the 
long  bench  used  as  an  altar.  The  services  at  both 
places  were  preceded  by  street  meetings.  Thousands 
heard  a  full  gospel  in  the  open  air.  All  classes 
stopped  to  listen.  Many  who  followed  into  the  hall 
would  fall  on  their  knees  at  the  altar  before  any 
preaching  was  done  more  than  they  heard  on  the 
street.  Afternoon  prayer  meetings  were  held  daily. 
The  open  air  meetings  were  attended  by  the  power 
of  the  Spirit.  Some  of  the  workers  fairly  trembled 
as  they  stood  before  the  people  with  burning  mes- 
sages. As  the  holy  anointing  came  upon  me  I  felt 
like  running  through  a  troop  and  leaping  over  a  wall. 
Persecution  and  opposition  only  made  me  stronger. 
It  was  liberty  beyond  words  to  express.  "Whom 
the  Son  makes  free  is  free  indeed."  This  freedom 


212       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

had    cost    me   everything — my    church,    reputation 
and  all. 

SOME  REMARKABLE  STREET  MEETINGS. 

One  evening  as  I  left  home  with  two  or  three 
workers  to  hold  an  open  air  meeting  at  Sixteenth  and 
Larimer  street,  I  was  told  that  we  needed  five  dol- 
lars worth  of  groceries.  My  husband  was  away 
from  home  and  I  had  less  than  fifty  cents  in  my 
pocket.  A  few  songs  were  sung  and  a  prayer  of- 
fered when  a  large  crowd  began  to  gather  around 
us.  The  messages  were  given  with  power.  Many 
wept,  others  were  indignant  and  a  number  of  drunk- 
en men,  staggering  through  the  crowd,  made  a  dis- 
turbance. A  conflict  with  the  powers  of  darkness 
was  on.  As  the  word  went  forth  a  quietness  stole 
over  the  audience.  A  man  on  whose  face  sin  had 
left  its  traces  placed  a  five  dollar  bill  in  my  hand  and 
said  "Please  pray  for  me."  Another  handed  me  a 
dollar,  and  others  gave  smaller  sums.  We  never 
take  collections  on  the  streets  and  had  said  nothing 
about  money.  Before  closing  eleven  men  raised 
their  hands  for  prayer.  This  meeting  ran  for  two 
hours.  At  this  time  we  were  without  a  hall. 

Again  on  the  same  corner,  it  was  sprinkling 
rain.  Less  than  a  dozen  persons  stopped,  the  ene- 
my mocked  while  two  or  three  of  the  workers  were 
speaking.  The  outlook  was  discouraging  and  we 
were  on  the  point  of  giving  up  the  meeting  and  re- 
turning to  the  hall,  when  the  Spirit  moved  me  to 
speak.  The  first  sentence  was  scarcely  uttered  when 
the  Holy  Ghost  fell  upon  me.  It  was  a  shock  from 


OPENING  IN   DENVER.  213 

the  heavenly  battery.  The  people  came  from  every 
direction  and  soon  a  multitude  was  enmassed  about 
us.  After  speaking  forty  minutes  a  song  was  sung; 
some  of  the  people  moved  on  and  gave  place  to 
others.  Resting  a  few  minutes  the  Spirit  gave  an- 
other message,  this  time  a  half  hour  long.  Perhaps 
a  thousand  people  heard  the  gospel  on  the  street  that 
evening  after  we  had  been  at  the  point  of  giving 
up  the  meeting  as  a  failure. 

At  another  time  our  usual  street  congregation 
had  gathered.  An  old  man  who  held  spite  against 
me,  because  he  was  called  down  in  a  meeting  on 
account  of  the  evil  spirit  he  manifested,  took  a  stand 
a  few  feet  from  us  and  began  to  talk.  Confusion 
followed  and  the  people  kept  running  back  and  forth 
to  hear  what  was  said.  No  policeman  was  in  sight 
and  ere  long  the  street  was  blocked  with  people 
thronging  upon  us.  The  old  man  kept  pace  with 
two  of  the  speakers.  A  crisis  was  coming  and  some- 
thing must  be  done  or  the  enemy  would  have  the 
victory.  It  was  against  the  city  ordinance  to  stand 
on  the  sidewalk  and  preach,  but  as  there  was  not 
standing  room  in  the  street  I  saw  nothing  else  to  do. 
As  I  faced  the  crowd  the  Holy  Spirit  filled  my  gospel 
gun  with  dynamite.  There  was  no  lack  of  ammu- 
nition ;  nothing  to  do  but  fire.  Our  intruder's  voice 
failed  and  he  tried  to  get  away  when  a  burly  fellow 
took  hold  of  him  and  brought  him  back.  He  said : 
"You  commenced  this  fight  and  you  will  have  to  see 
it  through.  My  voice  is  given  out,"  he  replied. 
"That  don't  make  any  difference,  you  will  have  to 
talk  as  long  as  she  does,"  was  the  answer.  A  num- 


214       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

her  of  persons  surrounded  him  to  prevent  his  es- 
cape. He  made  another  effort  to  speak,  but  could 
scarcely  be  heard  above  a  whisper,  when  a  policeman 
appeared  and  told  him  if  he  ever  disturbed  another 
meeting  they  would  arrest  him.  We  had  prayed 
many  times  that  the  work  of  the  enemy  through 
this  man  might  be  stopped  as  he  had  often  disturbed 
us  before. 

One  evening  the  weather  was  a  little  cold  and  it 
seemed  almost  useless  to  try  to  hold  the  people.  As 
the  sword  of  truth  entered  hearts,  a  man  stand- 
ing in  front  of  us  became  very  restless  and  suddenly 
taking  a  bill  from  his  pocket  and  shaking  it  in  our 
faces  said  vehemently,  "I'll  give  you  this  if  you  will 
stop."  No  attention  being  paid  to  him  he  became 
furious,  repeating  his  first  statement  over  and  over, 
shaking  the  bill  at  me.  He  drew  a  large  audience — 
the  people  coming  from  all  directions.  John  3:19 
was  read:  "And  this  is  the  condemnation,  that 
light  has  come  into  the  world,  and  men  love  dark- 
ness rather  than  light,  because  their  deeds  are  evil." 
We  told  the  people  that  this  described  the  condition 
of  the  man  who  was  trying  to  hire  us  to  quit — he 
loved  darkness  rather  than  light.  He  suddenly  dis- 
appeared. The  enemy  overshot  the  mark  and  drew 
numbers  of  people  to  hear  the  gospel  who  other- 
wise would  not  have  stopped. 

Near  the  close  of  a  street  meeting  at  Eighteenth 
and  Larimer  a  young  man  stepped  forward  and  said, 
"I  came  to  make  light  of  this  service,  but  God  has 
laid  His  hand  on  me  while  standing  here.  I  have 
been  wayward  and  rebellious.  Lately  my  mother 


OPENING  IN   DENVER.  215 

sent  for  me  from  Kentucky  to  come  home  and  see 
her  again  before  she  died.  I  went  to  her  bedside 
and  hardened  my  heart  against  her  dying  pleas.  I 

am  the  grandson  of  Bishop ,  of  Kentucky.    God 

has  laid  His  hand  on  me  on  this  street  corner  to- 
night. I  give  myself  to  Him  and  feel  that  He 
saves  me." 

A  sister  was  preaching  on  the  street  with  great 
power  when  a  man  who  looked  like  a  tramp  began 
to  scoff.  My  mother,  who  was  present,  touched  his 
arm  and  begged  him  not  to  disturb  the  meeting. 
He  asked  abruptly,  "Who  are  you  anyhow?"  She 
made  no  reply.  He  added,  "I  am  from  Kentucky." 
"I'm  from  Kentucky,  too,"  she  said,  "and  I  am  more 
ashamed  of  you  than  ever."  He  then  let  it  be  known 
that  he  was  from  the  town  in  which  we  had  lived 
for  many  years.  When  he  learned  this  he  was 
amazed  and  said,  "Then  I  suppose  you  must  have 
known  my  people  there."  He  proved  to  be  the  prod- 
igal son  of  our  family  physician  who  had  been  a 
banker  in  the  town.  Long  since  he  had  seen  his 
parents,  my  mother  had  stood  at  their  bedside  and 
helped  to  close  their  eyes  in  death.  When  she  told 
him  this  he  wept  bitterly  and  lamented  his  fallen 
condition.  I  remembered  his  brother  in  the  banking 
business,  and  his  two  sisters  as  being  the  handsom- 
est girls  in  the  female  college.  Alas,  to  what  a  low 
state  this  wanderer  had  fallen!  Clad  in  filthy  rags, 
with  vermin  on  his  body,  begging  a  dime  with  which 
to  get  a  cheap  bed  or  buy  a  glass  of  rum.  Mother 
wrote  to  his  brother  in  Kentucky,  living  in  luxury, 
telling  him  that  she  had  found  his  long  lost  brother. 


2l6  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


His  reply  was  that  he  did  not  claim  kin  to  him  and 
would  rather  not  hear  anything  more  about  him. 
We  could  not  help  but  think  of  the  similar  spirit 
shown  by  the  elder  brother  in  the  parable  of  the 
prodigal  son. 

The  interesting  incidents  and  experiences  in  the 
work  are  seemingly  links  in  an  endless  chain, 
wrought  out  link  by  link  in  the  flaming  forge  of 
Pentecostal  fire. 


CHAPTER  XVII. 

THE    LEADVILIvE    CONFERENCE    AND    MISSION    WORK. 

Near  the  end  of  our  summer's  campaign  I  at- 
tended the  annual  conference  at  Leadville.  I  had  no 
thought  of  going  until  a  young  preacher  who  had 
been  sanctified  in  the  tabernacle  meeting  begged  me 
to  do  so.  He  said  he  had  friends  there  who  would 
gladly  entertain  me;  whom  he  hoped  I  might  help 
spiritually.  A  friend  handed  me  ten  dollars  to  pay 
my  railroad  fare  and  two  sisters  offered  to  take  care 
of  the  house  and  children  in  my  absence.  All  this 
was  done  without  my  making  any  effort  or  express- 
ing a  desire  to  go.  I  went  not  knowing  what  the 
Lord  had  for  me  to  do,  but  intended  to  walk  in  the 
light  as  it  was  shed  in  my  pathway. 

Bishop  Vincent  led  the  conference.  He  talked 
against  women  preachers,  altar  services,  pastoral 
calling,  the  modern  gospel  songs,  etc.  He  trampled 
the  God  honored  customs  of  old-time  Methodism 
under  his  feet.  I  could  not  have  withstood  his  fierce 
attacks  on  Christian  experience  had  I  not  been 
founded  on  the  Rock.  But  bless  God,  that  His 
thoughts  and  ways  are  as  high  above  man's  thoughts 
and  ways  as  the  heavens  are  above  the  earth.  He 
hides  the  mysteries  of  grace  from  the  wise  and  pru- 
dent and  reveals  them  unto  babes. 

While  the  wings  of  Satan  were  brooding  over 


2l8  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


the  Conference  the  Holy  Ghost  fire  was  burning  in 
my  soul.  I  had  an  experience  that  a  misled  bishop 
could  not  talk  me  out  of.  Glory  to  God!  "We 
wrestle  not  against  flesh  and  blood  but  against  prin- 
cipalities and  powers,  against  the  rulers  of  the  dark- 
ness of  this  world,  against  spiritual  wickedness  in 
high  places."  (Eph.  6:12.) 

The  backslidden  officers  of  this  Conference  re- 
minded me  of  Ahab's  wicked  reign.  This  wicked 
king  did  more  to  provoke  the  Lord  God  of  Israel 
to  anger  than  all  the  kings  of  Israel  that  were  before 
him.  (I.  Kings  16:33.)  The  spirit  of  Jezebel,  was 
present  in  the  leaders  of  this  conference.  They  were 
on  the  track  of  the  Lord's  prophets  and  determined 
to  have  the  head  of  one  Naboth,  whom  they  stoned 
behind  closed  doors  and  took  his  inheritance  (cre- 
dentials) from  him.  This  was  during  the  great 
strike  at  Leadville  among  the  miners  when  thou- 
sands were  wandering  idly  up  and  down  the  streets. 
No  grander  opportunity  was  ever  offered^to  preach 
the  gospel  to  the  unsaved.  An  audience  of  a  thou- 
sand men  could  easily  be  reached  any  evening  within 
two  blocks  of  the  church.  With  a  hundred  and  fifty 
preachers  in  town  the  Conference  made  no  effort  to 
reach  the  multitudes.  With  the  assistance  of  two  or 
three  persons  we  held  open  air  meetings.  It  was  in- 
spiring to  look  into  the  faces  of  these  miners  and  talk 
to  them  about  Jesus,  while  the  Pharisees  stood  off  on 
the  ragged  edges  of  the  great  crowd  and  criticised. 
There  were  some  of  the  younger  preachers  who 
would  have  gladly  been  with  us  had  they  not  been 
afraid  their  heads  would  be  taken  also.  O  for  the 


BABIES  AND  BOTTLES.  2 19 

Pentecostal  baptism  to  deliver  men  from  the  bond- 
age of  ecclesiastical  tyranny.  Without  solicitation 
the  Congregational  church  was  offered  us  in  which 
to  hold  services.  Several  ministers  were  at  the  altar, 
and  before  the  conference  session  closed  there  were 
about  thirty  persons  in  all  who  professed  either  par- 
don or  purity.  The  people  asked  many  questions 
about  the  Pentecostal  work  and  wished  there  might 
be  a  mission  in  Leadville.  I  left  with  the  promise 
that  if  the  Lord  willed  I  would  return  and  open  one. 

CONFERENCE  BABIES  AND  BOTTLES. 

Real  babies  have  their  place,  but  the  unnatural- 
ness  of  a  dwarf  usually  brings  a  blush  to  the  cheek 
of  the  mother. 

Paul  says,  "I,  brethren,  could  not  speak  unto 
you  as  unto  spiritual,  but  as  unto  carnal,  even  as  unto 
babes  in  Christ."  (I.  Cor.  3:1.)  It  is  sad  to  see 
old  babies  without  teeth,  unable  to  masticate  or  di- 
gest food.  The  bottles  they  have  carried  so  long 
have  soured  the  milk;  their  digestive  organs  have 
become  impaired  so  that  the  very  sight  of  meat 
nauseates  them. 

The  sanctified  experience  will  enable  one  to 
discern  quickly  between  a  real  baby  and  a  dwarf. 
God  likes  real  babies.  Their  words  are  sweeter  than 
honey  in  His  mouth,  but  the  sallow7,  sickly,  whining, 
forty-year-old  ones  He  would  rather  have  kept  out 
of  sight,  on  special  ooccasions  at  least;  but,  strange 
to  say,  they  clamor  for  the  front  seats,  particularly 
at  the  annual  and  general  conferences.  They  like 


220       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

gold-headed  canes,  tall  silk  hats,  big  appointments 
and  to  be  called  Doctor,  Doctor. 

At  these  assemblies  mere  is  a  strange  clatter  of 
tongues,  mingled  with  confused  and  indistinct 
sounds,  followed  by  a  general  clashing  and  often 
smashing  of  bottles.  In  addition  to  the  individual 
bottles  there  are  special  bottles,  the  largest  of  which 
is  labeled  "University"  and  is  carried  by  the  chan- 
cellor. It  has  a  long  nozzle  and  stands  much  higher 
than  all  the  rest.  On  its  first  appearance  there  is 
a  general  clapping  of  hands,  then  the  stopper  is  re- 
moved and  the  gas  and  froth  escape.  Having  ceased 
to  effervesce,  there  is  little  left  but  dregs,  when  the 
members  are  called  to  empty  part  of  the  contents  of 
their  bottles  into  it.  Then  as  nothing  more  can  be 
done,  the  stopper  is  replaced  and  it  is  set  aside  to 
be  reopened  at  the  next  annual  meeting.  This  bottle 
has  taken  the  place  of  the  artesian  well  of  salvation 
that  used  to  overflow  at  these  gatherings.  * 

There  are  some  bottles  that  are  real  conference 
relics,  old  wine  skins,  whose  contents  are  discussed 
each  succeeding  year.  They  are  handled  very  care- 
fully by  the  fallen  church  officials  lest  some  preacher 
who  owns  a  new  wine  tank  in  Canaan  should  come 
along  with  an  extra  supply,  mingle  the  juices  and 
cause  a  fermentation  that  would  break  the  old  bot- 


Said  a  prominent  Methodist  divine  a  year  or  two  ago 
to  a  number  of  his  ministerial  brethren:  "At  University 
Park  they  are  putting  education  where  our  forefathers  put 
religion."  Is  this  not  what  the  Methodists  and  other  de- 
nominations are  doing  everywhere?  Education  and  other 
things  are  taking  the  place  of  vital  Christianity,  and  they 
are  breaking  the  first  commandment:  "Thou  shalt  have 
no  other  gods  before  me." 


PENTECOSTAL,     MISSIONS.  221 

ties.  The  new  wine  preacher  is  called  upon  to  report 
and  then  retire.  The  bishop  watches  him  very 
closely,  then  looks  knowingly  over  his  glasses  and 
asks  to  hear  from  his  presiding  elder  who  comes 
forward  and  with  deep  intonations  pronounces  him 
unsafe. 

One  bottle  of  which  there  is  much  said  is  "The 
pastor,  his  own  evangelist."  At  the  sight  of  it  there 
are  many  hearty  approvals  and  amens.  It  is  called 
the  safest  in  all  the  conference  museum.  All  wine 
transferred  to  this  bottle  must  pass  through  the 
cabinet  laboratory  and  a  thorough  analysis  is  made 
and  the  elements  of  fermentation  removed.  If  this 
process  has  not  been  sufficient  to  remove  all  the 
germs  of  life  there  is  a  cry  of  danger,  and  the  pas- 
tors are  advised  to  keep  their  old  bottles  securely 
corked  lest  they  become  the  receptacles  of  the  new 
wine  and  be  destroyed. 

Symbolically,  this  may  be  a  bottle  mixture,  but 
the  labels  bear  the  stamp  of  divine  truth  just  the 
same. 

Our  annual  camp  meeting  followed  at  Fort  Col- 
lins. Dr.  Godbey,  under  God's  guidance,  led  the 
hosts.  A  train  went  out  from  Denver  carrying  over 
one  hundred  campers,  nearly  all  of  whom  were 
Christians,  including  evangelists  and  missionaries, 
who  formed  the  nucleus  of  the  meeting.  There  were 
large  crowds  at  the  services,  especially  on  Sundays, 
and  God's  blessing  was  on  the  people  in  convicting, 
converting  and  sanctifying  power. 

Mother  Vorn  Holtz  returned  east  and  all  of  our 
efforts  were  centered  at  the  mission  hall  with  the 


222  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


every  night  work  outside  and  in.  Saturday  after- 
noon meetings  were  held  for  the  children  in  addi- 
tion to  the  Sunday  School.  The  children  were  al- 
most destitute,  and  nearly  a  thousand  garments  were 
sent  in  and  given  out  to  them  during  the  winter 
months.  Scarcely  a  night  passed  that  souls  were 
not  saved. 

During  the  Carnival  a  band  of  workers  went 
to  Twentieth  and  Market  and  held  a  midnight  meet- 
ing. The  power  of  God  was  marvelously  manifest. 
Soon  there  came  a  shower  of  eggs  from  roughs  in- 
cited by  inflamed  rum  sellers,  whose  prosperous  Car- 
nival trade,  for  the  time,  had  been  stopped.  A  Meth- 
odist minister  in  this  meeting  said  he  would  not 
have  missed  the  experience  for  a  thousand  dollars; 
that  he  got  a  new  manifestation  of  what  God  was  to 
the  Wesleys  and  others  who  were  stoned  for  His 
sake.  Nothing  daunted,  they  continued  to  preach 
until  many  broke  down  and  wept.  They  were  fol- 
lowed into  the  hall  by  seven  penitent  souls,  who, 
with  bitter  tears,  confessed  their  wrongs  and  sur- 
rendered to  God. 

The  work  continued  until  New  Years-r  when  the 
Peniel  Mission  was  opened  by  James  Howell  and 
my  brother,  C.  W.  Bridwell.  Their  hall  was  well 
furnished  and  in  a  much  better  location.  Many  of 
the  people  left  our  services  and  went  there,  giving 
for  their  reason  that  they  liked  to  hear  Howell  pray 
and  Bridwell  preach.  In  two  weeks  we  did  not 
have  an  audience  unless  new  people  were  gathered 
in  from  the  streets.  Previous  to  the  opening  of  this 
Mission  they  had  both  helped  us  in  our  meetings. 


PENTECOSTAL,    MISSIONS.  223 

Some  folks  thought  it  strange  that  this  work  should 
be  started  at  this  time  by  those  who  were  so  closely 
related  to  us.  Six  weeks  previous  to  this  our  two 
boys  were  sick  with  measles,  the  older  quite  se- 
riously. As  I  watched  at  the  bedside  night  after 
night  the  Lord  talked  to  me  in  a  special  manner 
concerning  the  future  of  the  work,  and  that  we  were 
not  to  be  confined  alone  to  Denver,  but  must  reach 
out  all  through  the  great  Rocky  Mountain  region. 
However,  the  tendency  was  to  build  a  nest  and  settle 
down.  When  the  Peniel  Mission  was  opened  I  saw 
it  was  the  Lord's  plan  to  stir  up  our  home  nest  for 
a  time,  in  order  to  push  us  out  into  new  places. 

The  last  of  February  1897,  we  were  impressed 
that  Leadville  would  be  our  next  field  of  labor.  I 
asked  if  it  were  His  will  for  me  to  go,  to  let  some 
word  come  from  the  sisters  I  had  met  there  a  few 
months  before.  A  letter  soon  came  from  a  person 
who  had  opened  a  Mission  and  wanted  me  to  come 
and  take  it  off  her  hands.  I  supposed  it  was  from 
Sister  Mary  Henderson,  the  president  of  the  W.  C. 
T.  U.,  whose  name  I  had  forgotten,  but  on  my  ar- 
rival was  disappointed  in  meeting  a  woman  of  en- 
tirely a  different  character.  I  saw  that  nothing  could 
be  done  with  her  work,  and  found  she  was  unwilling 
to  turn  it  over  to  us,  as  she  had  proposed  to  do. 
After  ten  days  of  suffering.,  privation  and  much 
prayer,  it  was  clear  to  me  that  another  mission  should 
be  started  entirely  independent  of  her.  With  the  as- 
sistance of  Sister  Henderson,  we  opened  on 
the  second  floor  of  a  building  on  the  main  street  of 
the  city.  I  returned  home  after  nearly  a  month' 3 


224  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

absence  and  my  husband  took  up  the  work  and  car- 
ried it  through  the  summer,  part  of  the  time  in  a 
tent,  with  the  help  of  Bro.  Edwin  Brace.  In  the 
after  part  of  the  summer  I  went  back  for  a  short 
time,  after  which  Bro.  J.  A.  Da  Foe  took  charge  of 
the  work,  laboring  there  for  nearly  three  years.  He 
writes  the  following  for  the  Pentecostal  Mission 
Herald,  in  1898: 

"During  the  past  year  the  work  has  been  sig- 
nally blessed  of  the  Lord.  At  least  five  hundred  and 
twenty-five  services,  including  street  meetings  and 
services  at  Oro,  have  been  held.  While  we  have  no 
exact  figures,  it  is  safe  to  say  that  one  hundred  and 
fifty  persons  have  professed  faith  in  Christ,  among 
them  some  very  remarkable  cases.  A  number  have 
experienced  entire  sanctification. 

"The  hall  has  been  purchased,  fitted  up  and 
opened  a"t  Oro,  where  in  addition  to  the  services  al- 
ready mentioned,  a  Sunday  School  is  being  success- 
fully conducted.  We  have  also  an  interesting  mis- 
sion school  in  Leadville.  We  have  been  able  to  dis- 
tribute through  sales  and  donations  quite  an  amount 
of  religious  literature,  including  Bibles,  books,  pa- 
pers and  tracts.  Much  house  to  house  missionary 
work  has  been  done  and  provisions,  fuel  and  cloth- 
ing have  been  distributed  as  necessity  required.  The 
evangelistic  meetings,  conducted  in  the  mission  by 
Revs.  W.  B.  Godbey,  C.  B.  Langdon  and  others, 
have  been  times  of  spiritual  refreshing  and  a  great 
help  to  the  work.  The  Lord  has  most  wonderfully 
stood  by  us,  encouraged  our  hearts  and  given  suc- 
cess to  our  efforts.  To  Him  be  all  the  glory." 


PENTECOSTAL    MISSIONS.  22$ 

After  we  made  up  our  minds  to  open  missions 
in  other  places,  the  Lord  having  allowed  a  sifting 
in  the  Denver  ranks,  raised  up  a  new  band  of  faith- 
ful workers  to  stand  by  the  Pentecostal  Mission. 
All  the  time  we  were  sinking  deeper  into  His  will 
and  becoming  more  firmly  founded  upon  the  Rock. 

The  Lord  favored  us  with  a  visit  from  Mr. 
White's  mother,  who  stopped  with  us  for  nearly  two 
years.  In  our  absence  He  provided  in  her  a  faithful 
guardian  for  our  two  boys. 

In  the  early  part  of  1898  we  were  called  for 
revival  work  to  two  country  districts  near  Greeley, 
Colorado,  where  about  eighty  persons  were  convert- 
ed or  reclaimed,  and  some  clearly  sanctified.  One 
beautiful  little  church  was  built  without  the  noise 
of  dishes  at  festivals  or  money  changers  at  bazaars. 
People  marveled  at  the  way  funds  came  in.  Money 
was  on  hand  to  meet  all  claims  when  the  building 
was  finished  ready  for  the  seats.  A  pastor  at  Gree- 
ley said :  "It  was  one  of  the  most  glorious  demon- 
strations of  saving  power  I  have  ever  witnessed. 
Sinners  were  convicted  and  gloriously  converted, 
and  believers  were  sanctified  wholly.  People  of  all 
denominations  were  baptized  by  the  Spirit  into  one 
body  and  have  kept  the  unity  of  the  Spirit  in  the 
bond  of  peace."  In  addition  to  our  city  missionary 
work,  we  supplied  this  work  for  nearly  two  years. 

Of  the  Mission  at  Colorado  City,  Miss  Emma 
Bailer  wrote: 

"This  work  was  opened  on  the  tenth  of  May, 
1898,  in  the  business  center  of  the  town,  among  sa- 
loons, brothels  and  gambling  halls.  The  Lord  placed 


226  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


a  great  burden  on  us  for  the  people,  and  being  clear 
in  our  leadings,  we  opened  a  Mission  on  the  faith 
line  in  the  face  of  opposition  and  discouragement. 
A  friend  in  Colorado  Springs  paid  the  first  month's 
rent,  and  with  the  assistance  of  Mrs.  Kent  White, 
we  opened  against  the  powers  of  sin  and  darkness. 
The  Holy  Spirit  attended  the  word  with  power,  and 
souls  were  rescued  from  sin  the  first  night.  The 
Lord  raised  up  friends  to  furnish  living  rooms  for 
the  workers  and  pay  the  running  expenses.  The 
street  meetings  have  done  much  good.  The  songs 
and  exhortations  draw  many  from  the  saloons,  who 
stand  and  listen  attentively.  Some,  after  entering 
the  hall,  said  it  was  the  first  service  they  had  at- 
tended in  years." 

On  the  Fourth  of  July,  1898,  at  a  Holiness 
Convention  held  at  Pleasant  View,  a  presentation  of 
the  Pentecostal  Mission  work  was  requested.  Some 
feared  that  it  would  check  the  spiritual  tide  that  had 
been  steadily  rising.  However,  a  short  time  was 
given  to  Edwin  Brace  and  myself  for  the  purpose. 
As  we  told  of  the  leadings  of  the  Holy  Spirit  and 
of  the  trials  and  blessings  of  the  work,  the  people 
were  so  moved  upon,  that  they  came  forward,  un- 
asked, and  laid  down  $43.25  to  start  the  work  at 
Cheyenne.  We  had  told  them  how  the  Lord  was 
burdening  us  for  this  place  and  that  two  or  three 
persons  were  ready  to  go  and  help.  This  was  fol- 
lowed by  a  crowded  altar  service  and  a  mighty  out- 
pouring of  the  Spirit. 

The  Cheyenne  Mission  was  opened  a  few  days 
later,  July  2Oth,  with  James  Bowes  and  his  three 


PENTECOSTAL     MISSIONS.  22/ 

nephews,  earnest  and  capable  workers,  assisting  us. 
For  over  a  month  services  were  held  in  a  tabernacle 
pitched  half  a  block  in  front  of  the  Congregational 
Church.  During  the  time,  the  workers  rilled  pulpits 
in  'different  churches  and  conducted  prayer  meetings 
in  the  homes.  The  street  meetings  drew  and  held 
the  people.  At  first  the  spirit  of  indifference  and 
unbelief  created  in  the  very  atmosphere  a  hardness 
that  it  required  courage  to  face  and  took  time  to 
break  down.  Like  thawing  ice  these  powers  began 
to  loosen  up  and  one  by  one  persons  would  come  to 
the  altar.  Most  of  the  people  converted  or  helped  in 
this  work  have  gone  to  other  parts  of  the  country. 
Some,  we  occasionally  meet  in  our  travels;  others 
we  hear  from  by  letters  written  to  some  of  our  mis- 
sionaries. 

There  is  always  a  time  of  seed  sowing,  sea- 
sons of  prayer  and  waiting  on  God  before  harvests 
are  given  in  the  Missions.  We  have  learned  to  pray, 
and  hope,  no  matter  what  comes  while  working  for 
God  in  hard  places,  remembering  that  "He  that  ob- 
serveth  the  wind  shall  not  sow ;  and  he  that  regard- 
eth  the  clouds  shall  not  reap."  (Eccle.  n  14.) 

Services  began  in  the  hall  on  the  24th  of  Au- 
gust. On  September  i6th,  Misses  Lovina  L.  Leach 
and  Helen  C.  Bushfield  took  charge  of  the  Mission. 
Miss  Bushfield  became  an  active  worker  in  our  first 
tent  meeting  in  Denver.  She  left  a  good  position  to 
give  her  life  to  the  work.  After  laboring  for  two 
or  three  jears  in  this  high  altitude,  she  needed  a 
change  and  went  to  California  and  thence  to  Hono- 
lulu, still  working  in  missions.  At  last,  worn  out 


228  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


and  in  need  of  rest,  she  wanted  to  go  to  her  home 
in  Canada.  After  reaching  there  she  wrote,  "I  could 
not  doubt  God's  leadings  in  my  past  life  and  now  I 
knew  he  wanted  me  to  come  home,  yet  I  had  not 
one  dollar  to  travel  six  thousand  miles  with,  and  no 
one  knew  my  need  but  God.  I  prayed  and  believed 
that  He  would  answer,  though  it  looked  like  asking 
a  great  deal.  God  converted  a  rich  man  in  the  mis- 
sion. and  put  it  in  his  heart  to  come  and  tell  me  that 
I  ought  to  go  home  and  take  a  rest.  He  put  a  bag 
of  gold  in  my  hand  containing  $275.00.  Oh,  God 
is  so  good,  and  faithful  to  His  word  !"  After  a  few 
months  of  rest  and  study  in  a  Bible  school,  she 
wrote  that  she  was  ready  for  the  work  either  in 
Colorado  or  the  foreign  field.  While  we  miss  her 
here,  yet  we  are  thankful  that  God  chose  her  for 
India,  for  which  place  she  sailed  in  November,  1901. 

Miss  Leach  was  for  five  years  a  teacher  in  Bish- 
op Taylor's  work  in  Chili,  and  had  been  a  missionary 
in  California  before  coming  to  Colorado.  In  the 
Pentecostal  Missions  she  has  put  in  several  years 
of  faithful  work.  She  sees  along  the  way  those  who 
have  been  brought  to  Christ  through  her  ministry. 

Sister  Delia  Huffman,  for  over  a  year,  was  in 
charge  in  Cheyenne,  and  since  has  been  in  more  re- 
sponsible positions  in  Butte  City  and  Cripple  Creek. 
We  saw  her  converted  and  have  witnessed  the  strug- 
gles and  victories  of  her  soul  as  she  steadfastly  has 
pressed  forward  and  upward  to  her  high  calling  in 
Jesus  Christ.  She  has  become  an  inseparable  com- 
panion in  the  work. 

Bro.  Jonas  A.  Peterson,  a  cowboy,  came  into 


PENTECOSTAL    MISSIONS.  229 

the  sanctified  experience  in  our  meeting  in  Cheyenne. 
He  bought  a  large  supply  of  holiness  books  and  as 
he  drove  his  team  across  the  plains  and  through  the 
National  Park,  working  for  ranchmen,  he  read  these 
books  and  the  Bible  and  inwardly  digested  the  truth. 
We  met  him  in  Butte  a  year  later  and  marveled  at 
his  growth.  He  has  been  working  in  the  Butte 
mission  ever  since,  part  of  the  time  in  charge.  He 
passed  through  some  testings  but  stood  true,  and 
God  rewarded  him.  He  now  has  a  devoted  Chris- 
tian wife  to  share  with  him  in  the  labor  and  the 
reward. 

We  have  a  number  of  young  people  entering  the 
mission  field  in  whose  lives  God  is  already  clearly 
manifested  and  who,  if  faithful,  "shall  receive  a  hun- 
dred fold  now  in  this  time,  houses  and  brethren,  and 
sisters  and  mothers,  and  children,  and  lands  with 
persecutions,  and  in  the  world  to  come  eternal  life." 
(Mark  10:30.) 

The  fifth  annual  camp  meeting  of  the  Colorado 
State  Holiness  Association  was  held  at  Greeley  Sep- 
tember, 1898.  The  work  previously  done  in  revival 
meetings,  we  held  in  the  country  around,  drew  many 
hungry  souls,  as  well  as  curiosity  seekers,  to  the  ser- 
vices. The  altars  were  filled  with  a  goodly  number 
of  seekers  and  many  prayed  through  to  victory.  It 
was  here  that  my  soul  was  burdened  to  put  the  Pen- 
tecostal work  before  the  people,  but  the  committee 
hesitated  to  have  me  do  so.  They  finally  consented 
to  my  having  a  few  minutes,  but  their  reluctance  and 
apparent  dissatisfaction,  when  a  little  more  time  was 
taken  up  than  was  allotted,  caused  me  great  suffer- 


230  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

ing  for  two  days  afterwards,  when  the  Lord  came 
and  comforted  my  heart  by  showing  me  that  it  was 
His  will  for  the  Pentecostal  folks  to  have  a  camp 
meeting  of  their  own. 

After  the  summer's  work  was  over  the  Lord 
kept  me  waiting  before  Him  for  several  weeks.  We 
were  feeling  the  need  of  a  home  training  school  for 
our  missionaries.  A  number  of  young  people  were 
willing  to  give  up  their  positions  and  devote  their 
whole  time  to  the  work.  Some  of  them  only  had  a 
slight  acquaintance  with  the  Scriptures  and  but  a 
limited  knowledge  of  the  English  language.  Others 
did  not  have  the  advantage  of  orthodox  training  in 
their  early  life,  and  therefore  knew  but  little  of 
the  doctrine  to  which  Paul  told  Timothy  "to  take 
heed."  Such  persons,  though  they  may  have  a 
bright  experience,  unless  enlightened,  will  be  greatly 
hindered  in  their  work  if  not  set  aside.  Much  of 
the  so-called  wild  fire  and  fanaticism,  that  sometimes 
creeps  into  the  holiness  movement,  would  be  avoid- 
ed, if  young  Christians  could  have  the  proper  teach- 
ing at  the  start  when  they  can  be  easily  led.  The 
Methodist  Hymnal  did  much  to  establish  me  in  the 
right  doctrine.  It  ought  to  be  studied  and  used 
more  by  the  young  people.  My  desire  to  see  a  home 
and  training  school  increased  until  it  became  a  great 
burden.  The  financial  question  seemed  to  be  the 
greatest  problem,  but  I  believed  the  Lord  would  fur- 
nish the  means  to  open  it  and  carry  it  on.  One  night 
I  dreamed  that  instead  of  asking  the  people  for 
money,  we  should  call  them  together  for  prayer. 
Letters  were  written  to  our  countrv  friends,  as  well 


PENTECOSTAL    MISSIONS.  23! 

as  those  in  the  city,  asking  them  to  meet  with  us 
in  prayer  on  the  first  Thursday  afternoon  in  No- 
vember, 1898,  at  our  home,  1226  W.  Thirteenth  ave- 
nue. Forty-five  of  the  most  spiritual  people  were 
present.  As  the  matter  was  presented,  the  burden 
rolled  off  me  on  to  them.  Some  shouted,  others 
wept  and  said,  "It  is  of  God."  Different  ways  of 
securing  means  to  open  the  home  was  suggested, 
but  it  was  clearly  shown  me  that  I  must  ask  no  one 
for  anything  myself,  or  in  any  way  lean  on  the  arm 
of  flesh,  and  that  in  trusting  the  Lord  fully  He 
would  move  on  the  hearts  of  others  to  bring  or  send 
it  in.  Within  a  few  weeks,  money  was  on  hand  to 
pay  the  first  month's  rent;  also  furniture  and  pro- 
visions to  begin  with.  On  the  first  of  February, 
1899,  the  home  was  opened  in  a  ten-room  building 
on  Twenty-second  street.  Three  months  later  we 
moved  to  2348  Champa  street,  our  present  location 
— a  much  larger  and  more  commodious  place.  •  We 
have  had  from  sixteen  to  twenty-five  persons  in  the 
Home  since  it  was  opened,  and  truly  He,  who  is 
the  head  of  the  work,  has  supplied  all  our  needs  ac- 
cording to  His  riches  in  glory.  On  the  first  of  the 
month,  our  rents  have  always  been  met.  We  have 
no  resources  of  our  own  and  there  are  no  individuals 
on  whom  we  are  depending,  neither  have  we  any 
subscribers  to  the  Home,  and  while  we  make  no 
charge  for  board,  room  rent,  etc.,  some  have  made 
us  a  free  will  offering,  according  to  their  ability. 
No  one  who  is  called  of  the  Lord  to  this  work  is 
barred  out  for  want  of  means.  We  pay  no  salaries 


232  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

and  hire  no  servants.     All  are  the  love  slaves  of 
Jesus  and  what  they  do  is  done  as  unto  the  Lord. 

MISSIONARY   WORK  IN    MONTANA. 

On  the  27th  of  June,  1899,  my  husband,  two 
boys  and  myself  left  for  Butte  City,  Montana,  to 
open  a  mission.  We  did  not  have  money  to  take  the 
trip,  yet  so  clear  were  the  leadings  of  the  Spirit, 
that  Mr.  White  packed  his  trunk,  bade  the  folks 
good  bye  and  left  on  Saturday  for  Greeley,  where 
he  was  to  preach  on  Sunday,  and  join  us  there  at 
the  train  on  Tuesday.  Instead  of  receiving  five  or 
six  dollars  as  was  customary,  they  paid  him  thirty, 
the  amount  needed.  The  Lord  was  very  precious 
all  the  way  on  this  thousand  mile  journey,  and 
showed  His  hand  in  tokens  of  favor  that  meant 
much  to  us.  We  visited  our  friends  a  few  days  at 
Dillon  and  then  went  on  to  Butte.  We  found  living 
expenses  were  high  and  it  was  almost  impossible 
to  rent  a  room  at  any  reasonable  price.  It  was  still 
harder  to  find  a  hall  for  our  work,  centrally  located, 
where  we  would  be  able  to  reach  the  people.  In  our 
extremity  we  thought  of  renting  a  rather  poorly 
located  store  room  at  a  high  rental,  when  a  case  of 
scarlet  fever  next  door  to  it,  stopped  us.  We  now 
had  only  a  few  dollars  left  and  had  to  change  our 
rooming  place  the  next  day.  It  \vas  Sunday  after- 
noon and  we  felt  that  something  would  have  to  be 
done  quickly,  if  it  were  done  at  all.  We  had  been 
in  many  such  places  before  and  found  no  way  out 
but  to  pray  through.  While  we  were  waiting  upon 
our  knees  before  God  the  evidence  came  that  a  place 


3  » 

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a-  Q  CD 


<1    »    &  O    T3    g; 


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is- 

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a  a  3 


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S* 

»"  td 
B  o 


PENTECOSTAL    MISSIONS.  233 

would  be  quickly  found.  The  next  morning,  just  as 
I  awakened,  I  saw  my  husband's  gold  watch  before 
me.  The  thought  came:  sell  the  gold  and  put  the 
works  in  a  silver  case.  We  had  known  for  some 
time  that  the  Lord  would  be  pleased  to  have  the 
gold  put  to  better  use,  especially  when  the  scriptures 
forbids  the  wearing  of  it. 

He  had  once  tried  in  Denver  to  sell  the  case  and 
failed  to  receive  a  satisfactory  offer.  The  gold  in  the 
case  was  sold  for  thirty-three  dollars  and  the  move- 
ment put  in  a  silver  one  costing  five. 

I  was  led  to  walk  out  in  the  resident  portion  of 
the  city  and  again  look  for  housekeeping  rooms.  A 
lady  was  showing  me  some  rooms,  and  in  the  course 
of  the  conversation  I  told  her  why  we  had  come  to 
Butte  and  our  failure  to  find  a  hall.  She  was  a  "Lat- 
ter Day  Saint,"  and  her  people  had  searched  the  city 
over  to  find  a  place  in  which  to  hold  their  meetings. 
She  said  there  was  only  one  room  in  the  city  trrtt 
could  be  had  for  our  work.  "It  will  suit  you  ex- 
actly, as  it  is  central,  and  can  be  had  for  a  reasonable 
price."  It  was  the  dining-room  of  a  large  boarding 
house,  just  a  few  feet  down  from  the  sidewalk.  The 
room  was  secured  and  the  first  two  weeks'  rent  paid 
with  the  watch  money. 

The  Methodists  were  building  a  new  church  and 
gave  us  their  old  seats.  But  our  difficulties  were  not 
ended,  for  the  chief  of  police  forbade  us  holding 
open  air  meetings.  He  was  unreasonable  and  im- 
polite and  said  if  we  attempted  to  do  so  he  would  take 
us  to  jail.  The  Mayor  gave  us  no  encouragement 
and  told  us  that  whatever  the  Chief  said  would  have 


234  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUI,AH. 

to  stand.  There  was  no  way  to  get  the  people  into 
the  hall  without  the  open  air  meetings,  and  it  meant 
we  were  to  go  no  farther  or  face  the  jail.  We  made 
up  our  minds  to  do  the  latter.  We  trembled  a  little 
as  we  sang  our  first  song  on  the  street  corner,  not 
knowing  what  moment  an  officer  would  lay  his  hand 
upon  us.  The  battle  was  fought  and  the  victory  won 
in  our  own  hearts,  and  they  were  not  permitted  to 
touch  us.  Glory  to  God!  He  can  shut  the  lions' 
mouths  and  open  the  doors  of  prisons.  From  night 
to  night  we  proclaimed  the  gospel  message  in  this 
Gomorrah  of  the  West.  Never  had  we  seen  the  bul- 
warks of  the  enemy  so  prominent  or  sin  so  bold- 
faced. As  we  preached,  prayed  and  even  agonized 
God  gave  us  the  assurance  that  His  word  would 
hammer  in  pieces  the  rock. 

Until  help  arrived  nearly  four  months  later 
neither  of  us  missed  a  service,  yet  we  were  won- 
drously  sustained  through  this  long  physical  strain. 
The  establishing  of  this  mission,  we  believed,  would 
become  the  doorway  for  the  entrance  of  Holiness  to 
the  great  Northwest.  We  labored  for  six  weeks  be- 
fore we  had  a  real  convert,  but  the  break  came  at 
last  and  there  were  seekers  at  almost  every  service. 
A  home  for  missionaries  was  fitted  up ;  most  of  the 
furniture  being  donated.  Our  hearts  were  made 
glad  by  seeing  a  few  persons  come  into  the  experi- 
ence of  sanctificaticn. 

I  returned  to  Denver  after  an  absence  of  about 
six  months.  My  husband  remained  three  months 
longer.  Bro.  J.  A.  Peterson  came  to  our  help  first, 
followed  by  Sister  Sadie  Wilder.  The  following  is 


PENTECOSTAL    MISSIONS.  235 

their  printed  report :  "The  Pentecostal  Mission  at 
77  E.  Park  St.  is  doing  much  good  and  deserves  a 
great  deal  of  encouragement.  During  the  first  year 
of  its  existence  it  has  held  three  hundred  and  forty 
open  air  meetings  in  which  many  thousands  have 
heard  the  gospel.  Three  hundred  and  thirty-five  ser- 
vices have  been  conducted  in  the  hall,  with  a  total  at- 
tendance of  about  twelve  thousand.  There  have 
been  eighty-four  who  have  professed  conversion  and 
twenty-two  sanctification.  Besides  visiting  and 
praying  with  the  sick,  distributing  of  tracts  and 
other  religious  literature,  much  house  to  house  call- 
ing has  been  done.  The  Mission  has  no  other  re- 
sources than  the  voluntary  contributions  of  the  peo- 
ple." 


CHAPTER  XVIII. 

THE  GOOD  SAMARITAN. 

Do  you  love  your  neighbor  as  yourself? 

The  following  incident  may  help  you  to  answer 
the  question.  A  mission  was  to  be  opened  in  O.  T.,  a 
place  notoriously  bad.  It  was  reported  that  there  were 
in  it  thirty-two  saloons  and  perhaps  a  brothel  for 
each.  Three  miles  away  was  the  town  of  C.  S.,  with 
millionaires,  magnificent  churches,  and  ministers 
who  lived  in  splendid  houses,  received  large  salaries 
and  rode  in  fine  carriages.  There  were  no  saloons 
there.  This  made  the  liquor  business,  with  all  its 
attendant  evils,  in  O.  T.  very  prosperous,  for  hun- 
dreds came  on  the  cars  and  in  carriages  to  this  mod- 
ern Gomorrah  to  debauch  themselves  in  the  cess- 
pools of  sin.  "There  are  persons  in  those  closed  car- 
riages who  hold  high  positions  in  C.  S.,"  said  a  rep- 
resentative church  woman  of  C.  S.,  a  friend  of  the 
mission,"  and  some  of  them  have  their  names  on 
church  books  and  are  found  in  their  respective  pews 
on  Sunday  morning." 

With  song  books  and  Bibles,  a  little  band  of 
workers  took  their  places  in  front  of  a  palace  saloon. 
The  hydra-headed  monster  stared  at  them  with  hell- 
ish defiance.  Above  the  noise  of  wheels,  scoffs  and 
jeers  they  sang,  "Throw  out  the  life  line."  Silk- 
hatted  coachmen  hurried  past,  while  many  in  the 

236 


PENTECOSTAL    MISSIONS.  237 

saloon  came  out  to  hear  the  song.  There  was  evi- 
dent confusion  in  the  ranks  of  the  enemy  as  some 
alighted  from  the  cars  and  hid  themselves  quickly  be- 
hind the  bar  screens.  All  was  silence  when  a  message 
came  from  above  like  a  thunderbolt  from  the  sky. 
Traffic  in  drink  was  checked  for  the  time.  The 
proprietor  stepped  to  the  door  and  looked  on  with  a 
fiendish  glare,  while  the  storm  clouds  of  wrath 
wrinkled  his  brow.  The  meeting  was  closed  with  an 
invitation  to  the  little  Pentecostal  Mission  only  a 
few  steps  away.  The  missionaries  were  followed  by 
a  number  of  persons,  who  encouraged  their  hearts 
by  their  earnest  looks  and  close  attention. 

As  they  waited  before  God  at  the  same  place 
the  next  evening  they  felt  that  reinforcements  had 
come  from  above.  Only  a  part  of  the  first  song  had 
been  sung  when  the  saloonkeeper  stepped  out  and 
turned  off  the  large  arc  light  in  front  of  his  door  and 
left  them  in  the  dark.  Then  they  sang  familiar 
pieces,  held  more  tightly  to  Jesus  and  grew  bolder 
in  spirit.  The  messenger's  lips  were  touched  with  a 
live  coal.  Men  stood  and  listened,  apparently  power- 
less to  move  for  the  next  thirty  minutes.  Then  the 
gospel  net  cast  into  the  street  was  drawn  into  the 
hall,  where  a  learned  DD.  from  C.  S.  was  announced 
to  talk.  He  did  not  appear,  but  the  presence  and 
power  of  God  was  manifest  as  it  always  is  when 
fhere  are  persons  He  can  work  through  and  hearts 
He  can  work  in. 

The  next  day  the  above  referred-to  sister  called 
ta  see  the  leader.  She  hesitated  to  speak,  and  judg- 
ing from  her  manner  she  thought  she  had  a  great 


238  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

sui prise  for  her.  She  said,  "I  have  been  talking  with 
my  pastor  at  C.  S.  and  find  that  he  is  not  in  sympathy 
with  this  work."  Her  pastor  was  the  man  an- 
nounced to  preach  the  night  before  but  failed  tD 
come.  When  asked  what  his  objections  were  she 
replied,  "He  said  he  was  afraid  it  would  sap  his 
church."  He  had  hundreds  of  members,  among  them 
millionaires,  and  received  two  thousand  five  hundred 
dollars  salary.  They  were  planning  to  build  a  ninety 
thousand  dollar  church.  He  claimed  they  needed 
all  the  money  they  could  get  and  did  not  care  to  spare 
any  of  his  members  who  were  inclined  to  help  the 
Mission.  Moreover,  it  was  known  that  Rev.  P.,  a 
brother  pastor  in  the  town,  thought  that  the  Mission 
was  not  at  all  needed  and  felt  very  bad  because  it 
had  been  started.  She  then  added :  "If  these  min- 
isters oppose  the  work,  your  efforts  will  be  in  vain." 
She  was  discouraged,  but  believed  the  Mission  was 
just  the  thing  for  the  place.  The  leader  agreed  with 
her  that  these  ministers  could  hinder  it,  but  that 
God  was  able  to  carry  on  His  work  over  the  head  of 
every  opposition,  which  He  had  done  in  the  history 
of  every  true  missionary  movement.  He  had  chosen 
the  foolish  things  of  the  world  to  confound  the  wise 
and  the  weak  things  of  the  world  to  confound  the 
mighty. 

After  the  sister  said  "Good  evening,"  and  left 
the  room,  the  leader  dropped  on  her  knees,  scarcely 
able  to  see  through  her  tears,  and  cried  out  from 
the  depths  of  her  soul,  "O,  God  has  the  old  church 
in  which  I  was  born  and  of  which  I  have  been  a  mem- 
ber for  nearly  a  quarter  of  a  century  come  to  this  ?" 


PENTECOSTAL    MISSIONS.  239 

Her  heart  grew  heavier  and  she  said:  "I  must 
remain  here  on  my  knees  until  some  victory  is 
achieved  and  new  strength  received  to  go  forward 
in  the  work."  Her  Bible  was  beside  her  and  from  It 
she  had  received  courage  in  many  a  hard  battle.  As 
it  opened  her  eyes  fell  on  the*  story  of  the  Good 
Samaritan.  Substituting  C.  S.  for  Jerusalem  and 
O.  T.  for  Jericho,  she  then  read :  "A  certain  man 
went  down  from  C.  S.  to  O.  T.,  and  fell  among 
thieves,  which  stripped  him  of  his  raiment,  and 
wounded  him,  and  departed  leaving  him  half  dead." 
She  saw  that  this  unfortunate  man  represented  a 
class  of  people  which  the  missions  were  trying  to 
reach.  Sin  robs  its  victim  of  virtue,  friends,  money 
and  all  that  a  true  man  or  woman  holds  dear.  It 
bruises  the  conscience,  weakens  the  will  power,  dead- 
ens the  sensibilities,  debilitates  the  nerves,  develops 
the  sensual  and  makes  what  should  be  the  temple 
of  the  Holy  Ghost  the  habitation  of  demons.  It 
clothes  with  rags  and  makes  deadly,  ghastly  wounds, 
that  none  but  the  Great  Physician  can  heal.  How 
skillfully  the  surgeons'  knife  must  be  used!  How 
carefully  the  wound  must  be  bound  by  loving  hands ! 
These  unfortunate  ones  are  as  powerless  to  loosen 
themselves  from  the  serpent's  coils  as  this  man  who 
fell  among  thieves  was  to  bind  up  his  wounds  or  re- 
lieve his  thirst.  They  must  have  help  and  have  it 
quickly.  The  gospel  oil  and  wine  must  be  freely 
used.  No  other  remedy  will  avail.  "By  chance  there 
came  down  a  certain  priest  that  way,  and  when  he 
saw  him,  he  passed  by  on  the  other  side.  And  like- 
wise a  Levite  when  he  was  at  the  place,  came  and 


24O        LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

looked  on  him,  and  passed  by  on  the  other  side." 
This  event  revealed  the  true  character  of  these  men. 
What  class  of  people  does  this  priest  and  Levite 
represent?  You  will  find  them  in  the  story.  The 
Levite  is  the  Rev.  P.,  who  thought  the  Mission  was 
not  needed  in  his  town.  He  came  and  looked  on  and 
passed  by.  The  priest,  the  learned  DD.,  looked  in 
one  evening  and  also  passed  by  on  the  other  side. 
"But  a  certain  Samaritan,  as  he  journeyed,  came 
where  he  was."  If  these  persons  are  ever  reached 
we  must  go  where  they  are,  for  certainly,  they  are 
unable  to  come  to  us,  hence  the  command,  go  into 
the  by-ways,  hedges,  streets,  lanes,  etc.,  and  gather 
the  maimed,  the  halt  and  the  blind  that  the  table  of 
the  Lord  may  be  furnished  with  guests.  "As  he 
journeyed,"  signifying  that  it  was  his  business  to 
travel.  Persons  who  bear  the  vessels  of  the  Lord, 
filled  with  the  oil  and  wine  of  the  kingdom,  are  not 
in  a  state  of  inactivity.  "He  had  compassion  on 
him."  Jesus  looked  on  suffering  humanity  wounded 
by  sin 'and  wept  over  the  scene.  "He  poured  in  oil 
and  wine."  There  is  enough  for  all  the  wounds 
that  sin  has  made,  if  emptied  and  cleansed  vessels 
can  be  found  to  bear  it. 

The  prophet  commanded  tne  widow  to  bring  the 
vessel  into  the  chamber  and  the  oil  was  stayed  only 
for  a  lack  of  more  vessels  to  be  filled. 

"He  set  him  on  his  own  beast."  True  religion 
is  always  self-sacrificing.  He  did  not  turn  him  over 
to  others,  but  stayed  with  him  through  the  night  and 
paid  the  bill  himself.  "Which  now  of  these  three, 


WIDOW   OF  ZAREPHATH.  24! 

thinkest  thou,  -was  neighbor  to  him  that  fell  among 
the  thieves  ?" 

THE  WIDOW  OF  ZAREPHATH. 

When  the  Lord  sent  a  famine  in  the  time  of 
Israel's  apostacy  (I.  Kings,  I7th  ch.)  He  com- 
manded Elijah  to  turn  east  and  hide  himself  by  the 
brook  Cherith.  After  the  brook  dried  up  the  word 
of  the  Lord  came  again  to  him  saying,  "Arise,  get 
thee  to  Zarephath,  which  belongeth  to  Zidon,  and 
dwell  there ;  behold,  I  have  commanded  a  widow  wo- 
man there  to  sustain  thee."  Strange  that  the  Lord 
would  send  His  prophet  to  a  poor  widow's  house  to 
be  sustained  in  time  of  famine,  but  God  never  makes 
ajnyjmistakes.  The  outlook  must  have  been  anything 
but  encouraging  to  Elijah  when  he  met  the  woman 
at  the  gate  gathering  sticks  to  cook  the  last  handful 
of  meal  that  she  and  her  son  might  eat  it  and  die.  If 
some  holiness  evangelists  had  been  in  Elijah's  place 
they  would  have  backed  out  at  once,  concluding  that 
they  were  out  of  divine  order  and  had  mistaken  the 
voice  of  the  Spirit.  But  nothing  daunted,  the 
prophet  asked  her  to  bake  him  a  cake  first  and  after- 
wards make  for  herself  and  son,  assuring  her  that  the 
Lord  had  said  the  barrel  of  meal  should  not  waste, 
neither  the  cruise  of  oil  fail  till  the  Lord  should  send 
rain  upon  the  earth.  At  this  time  no  greater  test 
could  have  possibly  been  put  to  her.  With  a  starv- 
ing child  at  her  side,  and  looking  into  an  open  grave, 
she  was  asked  to  give  the  last  morsel  she  had  to  sus- 
tain life,  to  a  stranger,  on  the  promise  that  God 
would  work  a  miracle.  This  meant  surrendering  all 


242        LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

even  unto  death.  The  death  route  must  be  taken 
before  the  station  of  divine  miracles  is  reached.  It 
was  so  with  Abraham,  "as  good  as  dead"  (Heb. 
ii  :i2.)  We  have  jio  evidence  that  the  widow  of 
Zarephath  hesitated  to  obey  the  word  of  the  Lord 
that  came  to  her  through  the  lips  of  His  prophet. 
The  Holy  Spirit  will  reveal  God's  words  to  us  if  we 
keep  in  touch  with  Jesus,  regardless  of  the  channel 
through  which  they  may  come.  Elijah  was  no  doubt 
a  total  stranger  to  the  widow,  and  perhaps  not  of 
prepossessing  appearance,  yet  he  was  sent  of  God  to 
bring  relief  to  her  in  time  of  her  distress.  She  might 
have  objected  to  the  messenger,  or  argued  that  the 
risk  to  run  was  too  great,  and  then  again  that  if  God 
intended  to  increase  the  oil  and  meal  He  could  do  it 
first  as  well  as  last.  The  safe  way  from  a  human 
standpoint  would  have  been  to  hold  on  to 
what  she  had.  In  that  way  life  might  have 
been  prolonged  until  help  would  come  from 
another  source  or  until  she  saw  for  herself 
the  increase  of  the  meal  in  the  barrel.  But  in 
this  there  would.have  been  neither  sacrifice  nor  faith, 
and  "without  faith  it  is  impossible  to  please  God'' 
(Heb.  11:6.)  "Faith  is  the  substance  of  things 
hoped  for,  the  evidence  of  things  not  seen'*  (Heb. 
ii  :i.)  Faith  is  trusting  in  the  dark.  God  has  many 
surprises  for  those  who  are  risking  all  for  His  sake. 
A  little  girl  who  was  tenderly  endeared  to  her 
old  rag  doll  was  asked  by  her  father  to  throw  it  into 
the  fire.  She  did  not  understand  \vhy  this  request 
was  made,  and  hesitated  with  tears  in  her  eyes,  then 
threw  it  into  the  flames.  The  father,  delighted  with 


WIDOW   OF  ZAREPHATH.  243 

the  act  of  obedience,  brought  out  a  large  bisque  doll 
with  real  hair  and  blue  eyes  and  handed  it  to  her. 
She  leaped  for  joy  and  smothered  him  with  kisses. 
There  is  so  much  reserve  on  the  part  of  God's  child- 
ren that  they  are  often  kept  in  spiritual  poverty  when 
they  might  be  fat  and  flourishing,  wearing  the  festal 
garments  and  eating  at  the  King's  table. 

Some  persons  let  their  business  come  between 
them  and  God,  often  breaking  the  Sabbath  or  en- 
gaging in  other  questionable  things,  claiming  that  it 
is  necessary  to  do  so  in  order  to  provide  for  their 
families.  As  well  might  the  saloonkeeper  say  that 
he  had  to  sell  liquor  to  support  his  family.  If  God's 
word  condemns  one,  it  does  not  justify  the  other. 

A  sister  recently  sanctified  in  Kentucky  was 
condemned  for  buying  vegetables  on  Monday  that 
were  gathered  on  Sunday.  When  the  wagon  came 
around  the  next  Monday  morning  she  refused  to 
buy,  giving  her  reason,  and  in  doing  so  received  a 
great  blessing.  It  is  hard  to  keep  from  entangle- 
ments in  business  and  social  life,  but  God  who  has 
commanded  us  to  keep  ourselves  unspotted  from  the 
world  is  abundantly  able  to  see  us  through.  For  five 
years  I  have  not  been  on  a  railroad  train  or  street 
car  on  Sunday,  and  yet  I  have  never  missed  an  en- 
gagement on  account  of  it.  The  Lord  has  always 
provided  a  way  for  me.  A  little  planning  and  fore- 
thought will  enable  one  to  meet  engagements  and 
keep  the  Sabbath.  Many  persons  grow  faint-hearted 
when  the  way  is  not  clear  before  them,  and  take 
things  in  their  own  hands  and  failure  is  sure  to  fol- 
low. If  the  widow  had  been  careful  for  herself  the 


244  BOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

barrel  of  meal  would  have  wasted  and  the  cruise 
of  oil  failed. 

The  love  of  money  is  a  stagnant  pool  in  the 
backslidden  holiness  movement  of  to-day  that  needs 
draining,  to  say  nothing  about  the  lust  for  gold  in 
the  denominations.  Paul  in  his  self-sacrificing  min- 
istry, said :  "Demas  hath  forsaken  me,  having 
loved  the  present  world."  There  is  nothing  in  God's 
word  that  will  justify  a  hireling  ministry,  yet  many 
evangelists  and  preachers  have  put  a  price  on  their 
labors  in  order  to  protect  themselves,  and  are  un- 
willing to  give  their  services  without  wages  being  in 
sight,  and  the  result  is  evident  to  all,  their  cruise  of 
oil  has  failed.  Such  persons  are  already  fallen. 
Others  do  not  stipulate  sums,  but  at  heart  they  are 
just  as  covetous,  and  have  their  eyes  on  the  "filthy 
lucre"  as  truly  as  those  who  do.  Old  dry  bone 
preachers  talk  salary,  salary,  and  backslidden  holiness 
evangelists  flatter  the  dead  churches  for  the  purpose 
of  opening  doors  for  themselves.  If  they  can  leave 
a  meeting  with  the  good  will  of  the  pastor  in  charge, 
a  hundred  dollars  in  their  pocket  and  a  promise  from 
the  presiding  elder  that  they  can  work  any  place  on 
his  district,  they  consider  the  meeting  a  success.  But 
with  few  exception,  if  the  truth  were  only  known,  it 
was  more  of  a  success  for  the  devil  than  for  God. 
We  recently  heard  a  humble  brother  say,  "The  first 
campmeeting  with  a  remuneration  of  a  hundred  dol- 
lars is  sufficient  to  make  some  evangelists  top-heavy," 
and  added,  "It  is  astonishing  how  some  people  watch 
the  newspapers  to  see  what  is  said  about  them." 
Good  Lord  help  us  to  die  so  dead  that  we  can  say 


BAAI,  WORSHIP.  245 

like  St.  Paul,  -"None  of  these  things  move  me."  A 
person  who  has  really  been  crucified  with  Christ  will 
not  be  easily  resurrected. 

When  the  transforming  power  of  grace  reaches 
the  heart  one  of  the  first  noticeable  changes  is  a  dis- 
position to  liberality.  Persons  who  have  been  natur- 
ally close  will  open  their  pocketbooks  if  they  walk  In 
the  light.  Refusing  to  do  so,  they  bank  tlr  stream 
from  the  heavenly  ocean  and  leave  themselves  ro 
wither  and  die.  Many  are  suffering  such  a  fate. 
God  has  spoken  to  them,  but  unlike  the  widow,  they 
•have  refused  to  comply;  others  are  misapplying  their 
consecrated  money,  which  is  equally  deplorable. 
God's  true  prophets  warn  the  people  against  these 
blunders  and  point  out  to  them  the  real  cause  of 
Christ,  which  languishes  for  lack  of  means.  Strange 
it  takes  some  good  folks  so  long  to  get  awakened  to 
the  fact  that  it  is  displeasing  to  God  for  them  to  sup- 
port iceberg  religious  clubs  and  north-pole  preachers. 
Reader,  do  not  be  foolish  enough  to  think  you  will 
receive  a  reward  for  money  used  in  this  way.  The 
truth  is  you  are  putting  it  in  the  best  place  possible 
to  help  the  devil  fight  holiness,  who  cries,  "Church 
loyalty,  be  loyal  to  your  church !" 

BAAL  WORSHIP. 

The  widow  was  commanded  to  help  Elijah,  who 
had  the  arduous  task  of  ridding  the  country  of  the 
false  prophets  of  Baal.  Many  persons  will  preach 
against  Baal  worship,  but  will  not  slay  his  prophets. 
Instead  of  doing  this,  they  are  feeding  them  at  Jeze- 
bel's table.  How  long  will  people  willingly  close 


246  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

their  eyes  to  the  truth  and  pour  their  money  into  the 
coffers  of  an  apostate  church?  As  I  write  these 
words  the  fire  burns  in  my  soul  with  an  increasing 
desire  to  warn  the  people  against  this  idolatrous 
practice.  God  pities  some  people  in  their  ignorance 
and  stupidity  and  bears  with  them  for  a  time,  other- 
wise their  stream  of  supplies  would  have  been  cut 
off  long  ago.  While  He  chides  with  us  in  mercy, 
remembering  we  are  dust,  yet  it  is  dangerous  ground 
and  perilous  when  we  close  our  eyes  against  the  light. 
I  stand  before  Him  in  awe  and  ask  that  my  face  may 
be  hid  in  the  folds  of  His  garments  while  my  soul  is 
poured  out  in  tears. 

"And  it  came  to  pass,  when  Ahab  saw  Elijah, 
that  he  said  unto  him,  'Art  thou  he  that  troubleth 
Israel?'"  (I.  Kings,  i8th  ch.)  And  he  answered, 
"I  have  not  troubled  Israel ;  but  thou  and  thy  father's 
house,  in  that  ye  have  forsaken  the  commandments 
of  the  Lord,  and  thou  hast  followed  Baalam."  God's 
prophets  never  trouble  Israel ;  it  is  only  backslidden 
Israel  that  they  disturb.  When  Holy  Ghost  men  and 
women  are  accused  of  splitting  the  church  you  may 
be  sure  that  church  is  backslidden.  A  church 
that  has  embraced  the  world  and  simply  be- 
come a  religious  club  does  not  like  to  be  disturbed  in 
its  carnal  security.  It  is  easy  to  follow  in  the  wrong 
path  when  men  who  stand  high  in  social,  religious 
and  official  positions  lead  the  way.  The  wicked  king 
Ahab  certainly  emblematizes  corrupt  human  govern- 
ments, and  his  idolatrous  queen,  the  fallen  church. 
They  were  both  equally  persistent  in  the  worship  of 
Baal.  Jezebel  was  the  daughter  of  Ethbaal,  the  idol- 


BAAI,  WORSHIP.  247 

atrous  king-  of  the  Zidonians.  She  fed  the  false 
prophets  and  slew  the  servants  of  the  Lord,  and  suc- 
ceeded in  plunging  the  nation  into  more  dreadful 
apostacy  than  it  had  ever  been.  It  was  at  this  time 
that  Elijah  appears  on  the  scene,  and  is  accused  of 
troubling  Israel,  as  holiness  people  are  accused  of 
troubling  the  church.  He  made  a  fitting  reply  to  the 
king  when  he  answered,  "I  have  not  troubled  Israel ; 
but  thou  and  thy  father's  house,  in  that  ye  have  for- 
saken the  commandments  of  the  Lord,  and  thou  hast 
followed  Baalim." 

Allured  to  the  groves  of  idolatry  by  profligate 
leaders,  the  people  were  tempted  to.  bow  at  the  shrine 
of  Baal  and  kiss  his  image.  Is'hot  the  same  condi- 
tion of  things  apparent  to-day  ?  Multitudes  of  good 
people  have  become  fearfully  involved  in  political 
corruptions  and  dead  ecclesiasticisms,  voting  to 
license  harlotry  and  the  liquor  traffic  and  following 
Baal  in  the  churches.  They  are  led  by  presiding 
elders  and  bishops  into  associations  of  ungodly  I 
lodges,  where  with  the  saloonkeepers,  drunkards,  in-  / 
ridels,  blasphemers,  liars,  adulterers,  smokers,  etc.,  \ 
they  are  all  bound  together  with  theiSands  of 
secrecy,  branded  with  the  same  iron,  and  sworn  to 
protect  each  other.  I  asked  a  Methodist  preacher  to 
tell  me  what  good  his  lodge  did  him.  He  replied, 
"When  I  am  sent  to  a  new  place  and  need  help,  all  I 
have  to  do  is  to  give  the  distress  signal  and  the  Free 
Masons  will  come  to  my  assistance."  Is  not  this 
leaning  on  Baal  instead  of  trusting  in  God,  who  has 
said,  "I  will  never  leave  thee  nor  forsake  thee?"  Will 
He  not  say  of  them,  "They  have  forsaken  Me,  the 


248  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BJJULAH. 

fountain  of  living  waters,  and  hewed  them  out  cis- 
terns, broken  cisterns,  that  can  hold  no  water."  (Jer. 
2:13.)  Again,  "Thus  saith  the  Lord,  cursed  be  the 
man  that  trusteth  in  man,  and  maketh  flesh  his  arm, 
and  whose  heart  departeth  from  the  Lord.  For  he 
shall  be  like  the  heath  in  the  desert,  and  shall  not 
see  when  good  cometh ;  but  shall  inhabit  the  parched 
places  in  the  wilderness,  in  a  salt  land  not  inhabited." 
(Jer.  17:5-6.) 

A  number  of  years  ago,  I  met  a  young  man  in 
this  state  who  was  studying  for  the  ministry.  He 
finished  his  course  in  the  Methodist  University,  then 
went  to  Boston  to  further  pursue  his  studies.  Late- 
ly I  read  a  letter  that  he  had  written  to  a  pastor  in 
Colorado,  stating  that  he  was  expecting  to  make  a 
visit  back  to  the  Rockies,  and  that  he  wished  to  make 
an  engagement  with  him  to  lecture  in  his  church  for 
the  sum  of  fifteen  dollar.  There  was  not  a  hint  in 
this  letter  to  show  that  he  had  a  burden  for  lost  souls, 
or  a  desire  to  help  any  one  into  a  better  life,  but  as  a 
spider  weaves  a  web  around  himself,  and  looks 
through  the  flimsy  gauze,  it  was  plain  to  be  seen  that 
he  had  an  eye  for  self  only.  He  had  been  for  years 
packing  his  brain  with  knowledge,  which  resulted  in 
a  fifteen  dollar  lecture.  The  pastor,  making  no  re- 
ply, he  received  another  letter  stating  that  he  would 
give  his  lecture  for  six  dollars.  This  brother  claims 
to  be  called  to  preach ;  if  so,  he  is  eating  at  Jezebel's 
table.  In  the  early  days  Methodism  would  not  ha\e 
counteru'inced  this  departure  from  New  Testament 
principles.  Will  such  work  ever  disturb  fallen  Israel  ? 
No  true  minister  of  the  gospel  takes  the  lecture  plat- 


BAAI,  WORSHIP.  249 

form.  When  he  does  he  becomes  one  of  the  wan- 
dering stars  that  Jude  tells  about,  no  longer  held  ir> 
hi?  orbit  by  divine  power,  but  lost  in  the  iiiisls  and 
shadows  of  a  sin-cursed  world.  "Woe  u'lto  them ! 
for  they  have  gone  in  the  way  of  Cain,  and  lan  g'-eed- 
ily  after  the  error  of  Balaam  for  reward,  and  per- 
ished in  the  gainsaying  of  Core." 

When  Elijah  came  unto  all  the  people  and  said, 
"How  long  halt  ye  between  two  opinions?  If  the 
Lord  be  God  follow  Him;  but  if  Baal,  then  follow 
him.  And  the  people  answered  him  not  a  word."  This 
argument  is  just  as  applicable  and  unanswerable  now 
as  it  was  before  the  prophet  was  translated  in  his 
chariot  of  fire.  God  is  raising  up  an  unpolished  min- 
istry, not  unlike  the  illiterate  fisherman,  to  thunder 
in  the  ears  of  the  cultured  DD.'s,  who  have  become 
soft  and  effeminate  in  their  preaching  and  practices. 
There  are  people  who  may  be  helped  in  the  apostate 
denominations,  but  they  are  not  reached  by  support- 
ing false  prophets  and  walking  over  the  old  beaten 
paths  of  Baal. 

Elijah's  plan  to  exterminate  idolatry  and  save 
Israel  was  to  take  the  heads  off  these  lying  prophets. 
This  course  is  quite  different  from  the  course  some 
professed  holiness  people  are  taking.  Take  Elijah's 
track  and  Jezebel  will  pursue  you.  But,  hallelujah! 
the  sooner  she  gets  on  your  track  the  better  for  you. 
If  she  is  not  after  your  head  it  proves  that  you  are  a 
false  prophet. 

No  sooner  were  the  prophets  slain  than  there 
was  a  sound  of  abundance,  of  rain.  How  long  will 
the  heavens  be  shut  up  against  the  famishing  mil- 


250  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

lions,  because  the  professed  children  of  God  and  even 
holiness  professors  are  laying  their  sacrifices  on 
Baal's  altars?  We  are  told  that  the  false  prophets 
were  many  and  the  bullock  used  for  their  sacrifice 
was  given  unto  them.  They  dressed  it  and  called  on 
the  name  of  Baal  from  morning  untill  noon,  saying, 
"O  Baal,  hear  us!"  (i.  e.,  O  Lord,  hear  us.)  But 
there  was  no  voice,  nor  any  that  answered.  And 
they  leaped  upon  the  altar  which  was  made,  but  no 
fire  fell.  There  are  leaders  in  the  holiness  movement 
who  are  still  exhorting  the  people  to  lay  their  sacri- 
fices on  the  altars  of  worldly  churches.  The  truth  is 
their  offerings  have  lain  there  so  long  already — the 
stench  has  scented  up  the  vultures  from  the  pit  and 
reached  the  nostrils  of  God.  The  false  prophets  cut 
themselves  and  make  a  great  bluster,  chant  their 
doleful  anthems  and  blow  through  pipe  organs,  but 
the  fire  does  not  fall,  yet  they  tell  us  to  conserve  holi- 
ness in  these  clubs.  Good  Lord  deliver  us !  A  certain 
class  of  comeouters  who  have  made  the  mistake  of 
refusing  any  kind  of  church  government  based  on 
New  Testament  principles,  and  becoming  anarchists 
in  their  spirits  have,  like  the  black  pony,  taken  the 
bit  in  their  mouths  and  leaped  over  the  precipice. 
Satan  has  taken  advantage  of  this,  hoisted  a  reg  flag, 
called  "comeoutism,"  and  is  now  pawing  before  it 
like  a  wild  bull  in  a  cage.  One  glimpse  of  the  mon- 
ster frightens  some  poor  weak-kneed  professors  out 
of  their  wits  and  they  fly  back  to  Baal's  charnel- 
house,  where  black  birds  roost  and  scorpions  crawl. 
Is  it  any  wonder  Elijah  mocked  them,  arid  said, 
"Cry  aloud,  for  he  is  a  god ;  either  he  is  talking,  or 


BAAL  WORSHIP.  251 

he  is  pursuing-,  or  he  is  in  a  journey,  or  perad venture 
he  sleepeth  and  must  be  awakened."  No  doubt  they 
called  him  uncharitable  and  accused  him  of  being 
Pharisaical  and  bigoted.  Baal's  prophets  must  have 
been  sorrowful  spectacles,  cutting  themselves  with 
lances  until  they  were  reeking  in  their  own  blood. 
Many  preachers  like  Baal's  prophets  are  on  the  road 
to  spiritual  and  physical  suicide,  the  victims  of  their 
own  weapons,  while  the  death  blow  to  multiplied 
thousands  has  already  been  given. 


CHAPTER  XIX. 

CHICAGO    HOUNESS    CONVENTIONS. 

May  2nd,  1901,  my  mother  and  myself  left  Den- 
ver for  Chicago  to  attend  the  National  Holiness  As- 
sembly. We  arrived  at  the  Union  depot  the  next 
evening,  where  we  were  met  by  a  committee  who  es- 
corted its  to  the  large  auditorium  at  the  corner  of 
Clarke  and  Washington  streets.  There  were  about 
two  hundred  and  fifty  delegates  present.  As  I  en- 
tered and  looked  upon  the  congregation  I  was  im- 
pressed with  the  great  number  of  gray-headed  mem- 
bers in  this  gathering,  some  of  whom  had  started 
in  the  high  way  of  holiness  in  the  days  of  Inskip  and 
Phoebe  Palmer,  to  whom  they  frequently  referred. 
Prominent  among  them  were  C.  J.  Fowler,  Presi- 
dent ;  George  Hughes,  editor  of  "The  Guide  to  Holi- 
ness;" M.  L.  Haney,  author  of  "Inheritance  Re- 
stored;" Thos.  K.  Doty,  whose  book,  "Lessons  on 
Holiness,"  I  read  many  years  ago.  They  represented 
the  old  holiness  movement  and  tenaciously  held  to 
their  so-called  Wesleyan  views  of  Bible  holiness,  but 
according  to  history  these  services  were  woefully 
lacking  in  the  spirit  and  power  that  characterized  the 
meetings  in  the  past.  It  was  evident  that  the  move- 
ment which  they  represented  was  fast  being  sub- 
merged in  the  old  casts  of  dead  churchanity.  There 
was  a  painful  pressure  on  the  services,  which  those, 

252 


CHICAGO    CONVENTION.        <*  253 

who  had  complete  liberty  in  the  Holy  Ghost  could  not 
fail  to  detect  and  an  undercurrent  in  their  hearts  and 
minds  that  was  seeking  an  outlet.  There  were  issues 
at  stake  that  those  living  in  places  remote  from  holi- 
ness centers  were  apparently  ignorant  of.  The  pre- 
millennial  coming  of  our  Lord,  divine  healing  and  the 
exposure  of  modern  ecclesiastical  corruption  had  but 
little  place  in  this  assembly. 

It  is  not  enough  to  say  that  I  did  not  feel  the 
felowship  of  the  Spirit  with  the  leaders,  for  there 
were  times  when  long  dry  sermons  were  being  de- 
livered that  I  felt  my  heart  would  burst  through  its 
walls,  for  like  Jeremiah,  His  word  seemed  like  fire 
in  my  bones,  but  there  was  no  opportunity  to  give 
vent  to  my  feelings,  and  I  was  almost  persuaded  not 
to  remain  through  the  session,  but  happily  the  Lord 
had  a  feast  awaiting  me -of  which  I  was  unaware. 

About  fifteen  minutes  to  12  o'clock  on  the  fol- 
lowing Monday  I  heard  strains  of  music  that  seemed 
almost  heavenly.  On  inquiry  I  found  out  that  the 
Metropolitan  Church  Association,  a  body  of  holiness 
people,  were  beginning  services  across  the  hall.  The 
speaker  lost  the  attention  of  his  hearers,  as  every  one 
seemed  to  be  more  or  less  excited  and  anxious  to  get 
into  the  other  meeting.  Not  wishing  to  be  rude  by 
leaving  in  the  midst  of  the  discourse,  I  remained  in 
my  seat  for  a  few  minutes  looking  for  an  opportunity 
to  quietly  pass  out.  Some  one  whispered,  "If  you 
want  a  place  to  stand  in  there  you  had  better  go 
quickly."  On  reaching  the  door  I  pressed  my  way 
through  the  eager  spectators,  and  beheld  a  sight  such 
as  I  had  never  seen  before.  The  same  song  book  was 


254       BOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

being  used,  the  very  same  songs  being  sung  as  in  the 
services  which  I  had  just  left,  but  there  was  some- 
thing about  this  singing,  mingled  with  the  shouts  of 
victory  and  holy  laughter,  that  started  a  whole  or- 
chestra to  playing  in  my  soul,  and  with  the  rest  I  felt 
like  dancing  to  the  music.  I  had  never  been  in  a 
spiritual  atrnosphere  that  equaled  this.  There  were 
eight  or  ten  persons  on  the  platform,  leaping,  jump- 
ing, dancing  and  clapping  their  hands  and  presenting 
a  scene  that  was  indescribable.  I  thought  of  King 
David  dancing  before  the  ark,  and  of  the  dancing 
over  the  return  of  the  prodigal  son.  Instantly  I  saw 
that  it  was  not  only  beautiful  but  scriptural.  The 
breezes  from  the  heavenly  ocean  were  wafted  to  my 
soul  and  waves  and  billows  of  glory  rolled  over  me. 
I  found  myself  in  touch  with  the  whole  affair. 

My  thoughts  went  back  to  the  days  of  Elijah 
when  he  said,  "The  God  that  answers  by  fire  let  Him 
be  God."  This  was  truly  a  Mount  Carmel  scene, 
for  the  fire  fell,  the  heads  were  taken  off  the  false 
prophets  and  souls  got  through  to  God  amidst  the 
thunderings  and  lightnings  of  divine  power. 

There  were  many  shorn  prophets  in  the  audi- 
ence, and  as  the  two-edged  sword  was  wielded  some 
trembled,  others  turned  pale  and  others  hissed  and 
openly  attacked  the  speaker,  but  amidst  it  all  souls 
were  weeping  their  way  to  Calvary,  while  others  who 
had  been  delivered  were  leaping  and  shouting 
for  joy. 

The  leaders  of  this  convention  were  Rev.  Duke 
M.  Farson  and  his  companion  in  the  work,  Rev.  E. 
L.  Harvey.  The  demonstrations,  which  were  one  of 


CHICAGO  CONVENTION.  255 

the  most  characteristic  features  of  the  services,  beg- 
gars description.     Brother  Harvey  and  Andy  Dol-  \ 
bow  could  jump  higher,  come  down  lighter  and  keep    ! 
it  up  longer  than  any  of  the  rest.     The  great  beads  / 
of  perspiration  rolled  down  their  faces  and  as  vent 
was  given  to  the  pent  up  energy  within,  conviction 
went  like  an  arrow  to  the  hearts  of  the  unsaved. 

These  two  gatherings  might  be  compared  to 
two  great  brush  heaps  on  fire.  The  first  was  smoul- 
dering in  smoke  and  ashes  with  here  and  there  an 
outbursting  flame,  while  the  other  was  at  the  height 
of  conflagration,  yet  like  the  burning  bush  was  not 
consumed.  The  great  fire  drove  out  the  ground  rats, 
blowing  vipers  and  hissing  serpents  that  could  be 
heard  on  every  hand.  I  was  so  captivated  by  these 
services  that  I  determined  to  camp  on  their  trail,  and 
that  evening  attended  the  Metropolitan  church,  of 
which  Brother  Parson  is  pastor,  at  the  corner  of 
Huron  and  Noble  streets,  where  there  was  the 
utmost  liberty  in  the  Holy  Ghost. 

I  had  never  seen  M.  W.  Knapp  until  he  was 
pointed  out  to  me  on  the  crowded  platform  in  one  of 
these  meetings.  He  was  sitting  in  a  humble  position 
on  the  floor,  apparently  very  comfortable. 

A  few  days  later  I  was  asked  to  speak  in  this 
church,  and  on  the  following  Sabbath  spoke  three 
times  to  large  congregations.  I  might  add,  that  in 
fellowship  with  the  saints  it  was  the  greatest  day  of 
my  life.  The  altars  were  successively  filled  and  souls 
swept  through  to  victory.  There  was  a  great  stir 
in  the  community  of  this  church  and  many  persons 
were  excited  over  the  miracles  of  grace  wrought 


256        LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

there  .  One  or  more  policemen  often  stood  around 
the  door  as  the  great  crowd  made  their  way  through 
the  entrance  to  the  auditorium.  I  found  one  whose 
heart  had  been  touched  and  as  I  waited  on  the  corner 
for  the  street  car,  he  told  me  of  some  of  the  strange 
things  that  were  coming  to  pass  in  these  meetings. 
The  revival  had  been  running  for  nearly  three 
months,  and  I  understood  that  during  the  first  ten 
days  there  were  a  thousand  seekers  at  the  altars.  All 
the  doctrines  of  the  Bible  were  honored  and  duly  set 
forth.  I  heard  testimonies  of  bodily  healing  where 
nothing  less  than  a  miracle  had  been  performed. 
Persons  were  struck  down  under  the  old-time  gospel 
power  like  they  were  in  the  days  of  Wesley  and 
Finney.  They  believed  in  old-fashioned  holiness  and 
hell  and  preached  with  such  power  that  men  got  un- 
der conviction  and  cried  for  mercy.  The  old  walls 
of  dead  ecclesiasticism,  that  some  of  the  professed 
holiness  people  had  helped  to  daub  with  untempered 
mortar,  were  struck  with  the  sledge  hammer  of  God's 
truth  and  brought  down.  I  had  long  since  learned 
that  it  was  useless  to  try  to  conserve  holiness  in  these 
idolatrous  religious  clubs,  called  churches,  but  ifi'vam 
I  had  looked  for  a  people  who  would  handle  things 
without  gloves  and  deal  with  these  advocates  and 
their  unscriptural  methods  according  to  their  folly.  I 
found  them  in  this  company.  It  might  be  said  of 
them,  they  were  "as  fair  as  the  moon,  clear  as  the 
sun,  and  terrible  as  an  army  with  banners." 

MEETING  AT  PARIS,,  KY. 

May  the  I4th,  1901,  mother  and  I  arrived  at 


KENTUCKY   MEETING.  257 

Paris,  Ky.,  where  two  sisters  and  a  brother  lived. 
Three  days  after  our  arrival,  Mrs.  Savage,  the  oldest, 
was  sanctified,  and  Mrs.  Boardman,  who  was  in  a 
backslidden  state,  was  under  great  conviction. 
Some  of  the  Methodists  invited  me  to  preach  in  the 
church  Sunday  morning,  and  so  advertised  the  meet- 
ing. The  pastor,  who  was  off  on  a  vacation,  heard 
of  it  and  took  the  first  train  home,  interviewing  the 
members  of  the  official  board  and  claiming  the  right 
to  fill  the  pulpit  himself.  He  had  been  preaching 
but  once  on  the  Sabbath  and  I  understood  had  left  to 
be  gone  until  conference.  His  deliberate  setting 
aside  of  those  who  had  planned  for  the  service  Sun- 
day morning  aroused  a  spirit  of  displeasure  in  the 
hearts  of  some,  that  led  to  the  securing  of  the  court 
house  the  next  day,  in  which  to  hold  a  series  of  meet- 
ings. This  was  the  largest  and  most  commodious 
biulding  in  the  city.  On  the  following  Monday  even- 
ing we  opened  fire  on  the  forts  of  the  enemy.  Bro. 
Burns  of  Covington,  Ky.,  was  with  us  for  a  time 
and  rendered  valuable  assistance. 

My  sister,  Mrs.  Boardman,  who  was  the  most 
fashionable  dressmaker  in  the  city,  was  reclaimed 
and  sanctified  and  went  out  of  the  business  entirely. 
There  was  a  great  commotion  when  she  sent  back  to 
the  ladies  of  fashion  their  goods  untouched.  This 
was  used  of  God  in  advertising  the  meetings.  She 
enclosed  notes  telling  them  the  Lord  had  taken  her 
out  of  the  business.  Their  indignation  and  curiosity 
were  both  aroused,  and  they  came  to  see  what  had 
caused  this  marvelous  change.  Our  numbers  in- 
creased from  eighty-five  in  the  first  service  to  about 


258  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

four  hundred  later  on.  Forgetting  ourselves  and 
man's  wisdom,  we  just  let  God  order  the  battle  and 
went  in  to  be  used  as  it  pleased  Him. 

The  court  house  was  in  such  a  conspicuous  place 
we  were, afraid  the  officials  would  object  to  our  hav- 
ing the  use  of  it  after  they  learned  the  character  of 
the  meetings.  Mrs.  Boardman  and  myself  were 
walking  along  the  street  talking  over  the  matter  the 
day  before  we  were  to  begin.  She  pointed  out  a 
person  standing  by  the  door  of  the  postoffice  and 
said,  "Do  you  see  that  man  dressed  in  police  uni- 
form? If  he  objects  to  this  meeting,  he  has  the 
power  to  stop  it.  He  has  been  here  about  twenty- 
seven  years,  is  the  chief  of  police  and  is  simply  the 
king  of  the  town.  The  colored  people  are  so  afraid 
of  him  that  if  they  happen  to  be  standing  in  groups 
and  see  his  dog  coming  around  the  corner  they  will 
disperse."  My  brother  was  unsaved  and  mixed  up 
in  the  county  politics  and  then  running  for  office. 
Knowing  the  condition  of  the  churches  and  that 
there  was  not  a  place  where  spiritual  food  could  be 
obtained,  a  burden  was  rolled  upon  me  that  I  fairly 
groaned  under.  I  asked  God  to  put  His  hand  on 
this  officer  who  had  the  power  to  stop  the  meetings. 
His  wife,  who  was  a  backslidden  Methodist,  came 
out  to  one  meeting  and  expressed  herself  favorably 
in  regard  to  it.  He  was  a  Roman  Catholic  and  had 
no  use  for  Protestant  religion.  A  few  days  later  he 
passed  by  our  door.  Things  at  the  court  house  were 
beginning  to  get  warm.  As  I  looked  at  him  I  con- 
tinned  to  pray  to  God  in  his  behalf,  and  watched  him 
as  far  as  I  could  see  him,  still  asking  God  that  he 


KENTUCKY   MEETING.  259 

might  not  be  permitted  to  interfere  with  His  work. 
He  went  home  that  evening,  not  sick  or  even  com- 
plaining, and  went  to  bed,  addressing  his  last  words 
to  his  dogs.  The  next  morning  his  wife  was  awak- 
ened about  4  o'clock  by  a  peculiar  noise,  and  found 
it  to  be  the  death  rattle  in  his  throat.  She  hastened 
to  the  telephone  and  called  a  physician,  but  before  he 
arrived  her  husband  was  gone.  The  whole  town 
and  country  turned  out  to  the  funeral.  So  passed 
away  the  man  who  was  most  feared.  His  career  of 
intimidation  was  ended.  God  saw  fit  that  the  book  •: 
of  his  life  should  be  closed. 

The  meetings  continued  with  unabating  interest 
until  within  two  days  of  the  time  to  close.  The  col- 
ored people  filled  the  galleries,  and  on  this  evening 
there  was  only  one  white  person  came  forward  when 
the  invitation  was  given,  but  the  conviction  was  so 
great  among  the  colored  folks  in  the  gallery  that 
seven  arose  for  prayers.  We  dismissed  the  white 
congregation  and  invited  the  colored  people  down  to 
be  prayed  with.  The  recognition  of  this  down-trod- 
den race  raised  so  much  antagonism  in  the  hearts  of 
some  of  the  white  folks  that  they  succeeded  in  getting 
the  city  officials  to  stop  the  meetings  by  refusing  to 
let  us  have  the  building  any  longer.  I  went  with 
my  sister  the  next  day  to  interview  them  on  the  sub- 
ject. She  asked  them  for  permission  to  continue  the 
meetings  two  days  longer.  They  refused  on  the 
grounds  that  smallpox  might  break  out  among  the 
colored  folks,  as  there  had  been  a  few  cases  on  the 
outskirts  of  the  town.  We  knew  that  this  was  not 
their  real  objection.  My  sister,  in  the  glow  and 


260       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

fervor  of  her  new  experience,  warned  them  of  the 
consequences  that  might  follow  their  interfering 
with  the  Lord's  work.  She  told  them  frankly  she 
believed  something  would  happen  to  them  or  the 
building,  and  continued  to  exhort  them  until  they 
were  apparently  anxious  to  get  rid  of  us.  On  the 
way  home  she  persisted  in  saying  that  a  judgment  of 
God  would  be  sent  on  them.  Soon  after  this  the 
court  house  burned  down.  During  the  conflagration 
she  sent  word  to  the  men  who  had  refused  to  let 
us  continue  the  meetings,  asking  them  if  the  fire 
were  not  worse  than  smallpox.  They  made  no  reply. 

The  things  that  were  said  and  done  in  the  meet- 
ings spread  all  over  the  country,  reaching  Millers- 
burg,  where  the  female  college  and  military  school 
were  located.  The  students  called  their  parents  up  at 
Paris  to  talk  to  them  over  the  telephone  about  the 
meetings.  We  did  not  feel  that  under  the  circum- 
stances, in  the  short  time  that  we  were  there,  it  was 
so  much  our  business  to  get  people  converted  as  it 
was  to  expose  hypocrisy  and  counterfeit  religion  and 
lay  a  foundation  on  which  something  permanent 
might  be  built ;  yet  there  were  about  twenty-five  who 
sought  the  Lord  and  some  received  a  definite  experi- 
ence. They  have  since  held  their  cottage  meetings 
against  the  protests  of  their  pastors,  and  others  have 
been  added  to  the  number.  It  pays  to  go  to  the 
bottom  and  start  on  the  rock. 

After  spending  a  few  days  at  Brother  Knapp's 
Bible  School  at  Cincinnati  I  returned  to  Denver, 
where  some  precious  experiences  awaited  me. 


CHAPTER  XX. 

SHUT     OUT     AT     PLEASANT     VIEW CHRIST     AS     RE- 
DEEMER, HEAVENLY  BRIDEGROOM  AND  COM- 
ING  KING — THE   TRIBULATIONS. 

A  few  days  after  my  arrival,  the*  Fourth  of 
July  (1901),  Holiness  Convention  was  announced  to 
be  held  at  Pleasant  View.  This  annual  meeting,  God 
had  used  me  in  helping  to  launch  forth  six  years  be- 
fore, and  up  to  this  time  I  had  attended  them  all,  but 
now  my  name  as  a  worker  was  left  off  the  bills  and 
some  of  the  leaders  were  not  backward  in  saying  that 
they  did  not  care  to  have  me  there.  This  was  not 
much  of  a  surprise  to  me,  as  I  knew  it  was  only  an 
outburst  of  what  some  of  them  had  in  their  hearts 
for  at  least  three  years  previous.  It  was  only  a  ques- 
tion now  as  to  what  God  had  in  it  for  me  as  I  saw 
the  time  of  separation  had  come.  I  stayed  on  my 
knees  before  God  for  many  hours,  and  He  came  to 
me  with  the  sweetest  assurance  that  His  will  was  be- 
ing wrought  out  in  my  life,  and  this  experience  was 
to  be  used  in  bringing  the  rain  and  sunshine  to  de- 
velop the  flowers  and  fruits  in  the  garden  of  my  soul. 

The  Gettysburg  battle  of  my  Christian  ministry 
was  fought  at  Pleasant  View,  where  I  had  many 
spiritual  children  to  whom  I  was  tenderly  endeared. 
This  was  the  birth  place  of  the  holiness  movement  in 
Colorado,  and  had  it  not  been  for  the  everlasting 

261 


262  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


arms  that  sustained  me  there,  my  body  would  have 
succumbed  to  the  powers  of  hell  that  surged  against 
me  and  I  would  have  gone  down  to  the  grave.  "It 
was  not  an  enemy  that  reproached  me,  then  I  could 
have  borne  it;  neither  was  it  he  that  hated  me  that 
did  magnify  himself  against  me;  then  I  would  have 
hid  myself  from  him,  but  it  was  thou  a  man  mine 
equal.  We  took  sweet  counsel  together  and  walked 
unto  the  house  of  God  in  company."  (Ps.  55:12- 
14.)  My  rieart  was  comforted  by  the  above  words 
as  I  waited  upon  God,  realizing  that  I  had  been  true 
to  Him  and  His  seal  of  approval  was  upon  me. 

It  was  evident  that  the  holiness  movement  of 
Colorado  had  taken  a  compromising  attitude  and  had 
come  to  the  place  where  it  could  truly  be  said  that  it 
was  neither  cold  nor  hot.  A  few  persons  who  were 
ambitious  for  leadership  were  catering  to  worldly 
denominations  and  ecclesiastical  dignitaries  and  their 
identity  as  holiness  people  was  lost.  Instead  of  be- 
ing the  apple  of  God's  eye  they  were  like  the  Laodi- 
cean church  —  nauseating  to  Him.  Remembering  the 
pit  from  whence  we  were  digged,  I  determined  to 
be  true  at  any  cost,  rather  than  be  submerged 
in  its  slime  again.  Forty-eight  hours  were  spent  be- 
fore God  in  fasting  and  prayer,  when  new  revela- 
tions of  His  will  concerning  His  work  came  to  my 
heart.  The  most  unspeakable  joy  filled  my  soul  as 
He  revealed  His  love  to  me  in  the  relationship  of  the 
heavenly  bridegroom.  Some  things  were  kept  in 
my  own  heart,  even  from  those  who  were  dearest  to 
me,  and  to-day  my  soul  mounts  up  on  eagle's  wings 
into  the  very  bosom  of  His  power  and  glory,  breath- 


AT  PEASANT  VIEW.  263 

ing  the  pure  atmosphere  of  cloudless  sunshine.  O 
Thou  matchless  Christ!  "Every  day  will  I  bless 
Thee  and  I  will  praise  Thy  name  forever  and  ever/' 
"Great  is  the  Lord  and  greatly  to  be  praised  and  His 
greatness  is  unsearchable."  "He  will  keep  the  feet 
of  His  saints  and  the  wicked  sliall  be  silent  in  dark- 
ness." How  glad  I  am  that  He  has  enabled  me  to 
take  the  crucifixion  route.  How  glorious  to  die  to 
this  sin-cursed  world  and  the  powers  that  sway  it" 
and  then  mount  up  on  gold  tipped  pinions  above  its 
wreck  and  ruin. 

"Let  the  righteous  smite  me;  it  shall  be  a 
kindness ;  and  let  him  reprove  me ;  it  shall  be  an  ex- 
cellent oil,  which  shall  not  break  my  head ;  for  yet  my 
prayer  also  shall  be  in  their  calamities."  (Ps.  14: 
15.)  The  strokes  that  have  been  laid  heavily  upon 
me  have  only  proved  a  kindness  and  an  excellent  oil, 
for  it  was  then  my  Beloved  drew  me  into  the  secret 
chamber  where  His  words  were  sweeter  to  my  soul 
than  the  honey  and  the  honey  comb."  Wounds  made 
at  the  hands  of  mere  nominal  professors,  are  not  to 
be  compared  to  those  made  by  holiness  people  who 
once  had  the  blessing  and  have  lost  it.  "This  was 
the  most  unkindest  cut  of  all."  They,  like  Joseph's 
brethren,  will  put  their  victim  in  a  pit  and  sit  down 
to  eat  bread,  forgetting  the  anguish  of  his  soul.  "No 
weapon  formed  against  Thee  shall  prosper."  Tt 
proved  a  kindness  to  Joseph,  an  ointment  to  his  head, 
and  a  doorway  to  a  throne.  The  Psalmist  said  his 
prayer  should  be  in  their  calamities.  We  have  never 
prayed  that  calamities  should  be  sent  upon  any  one, 
but  have  asked  the  Lord  to  lay  His  hand  on  those 


264  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

who  were  hindering  His  work  and  within  three 
months  of  the  above  experience  five  of  the  officers  of 
this  Association  were  at  death's  door  at  one  time 
and  others  reaping  an  experience  of  disappointment 
too  bitter  to  find  words  to  express.  These,  and  some 
other  chastisement*  +W  followed  were  all  from  the 
hand  of  a  loving  Father,  who  loves  the  least  of  TTis 
children  too  well  to  forsake  them,  or  leave  them  to 
their  own  understanding.  The  Psalmist  said,  "T  am 
grieved  with  these  that  rise  up  against  Thee ;  I  count 
them  enemies."  Persons  who  are  trying  to  lower 
the  standard  of  holiness  until  it  will  not  be  offensive 
to  a  backslidden  church  have  lost  "the  blessing"  --if 
they  ever  had  it,  and  are  the  enemies  of  the  croc<>  of 
Christ. 

Soon  after  my  return  from  Kentucky  we  lost 
our  hall  on  Larimer  street.  I  had  a  shout  in  my  coul. 
knowing  that  God's  hand  was  in  it.  A  large  gospel 
tent  was  put  up  at  Twenty-third  and  California 
streets,  where  we  held  every  night  gospel  meetings, 
culminating  in  a  big  revival  led  by  Brother  F.  A. 
Fergerson.  At  least  seven  hundred  people  were  at 
times  seated  under  the  canvass,  while  there  were 
scores  standing  on  the  outside.  It  was  evident  the 
Lord  was  bringing  the  work  to  a  higher  plane  than 
it  had  hitherto  been,  for  many  of  our  missionaries 
and  Bible  students  as  well  as  others  were  enjoying 
a  spiritual  freedom  that  they  had  never  known  be- 
fore. This  aroused  antagonism  in  the  hearts  of  cold- 
hearted  professors,  which  was  used  of  the  I  ord  in 
giving  us  greater  strength  with  which  to  Combat 
the  enemy. 


PRAISE.  265 

It  was  during  this  meeting  that  my  brother, 
Chas.  W.  Bridwell,  was  married  to  Lillian  O. 
Thomas,  a  young  lady  from  the  holiness  ranks,  who 
had  attended  our  services,  especially  the  Thursday 
afternoon  holiness  meetings,  for  five  years.  She  had 
stayed  in  the  ranks  and  been  true  to  God,  while  suf- 
fering some  severe  persecutions  from  her  own 
church.  God's  blessing  was  upon  the  little  quiet 
wedding  that  took  place  at  the  home  of  her  parents, 
1305  South  Ninth  street,  on  the  evening  of  Septem- 
ber 17,  1901.  Mr.  White  performed  the  ceremony 
in  the  presence  of  a  few  friends.  During  the  prayer 
that  followed  the  ceremony  there  were  outbursts  of 
praise  and  joy  as  the  Spirit  of  God  was  poured  out 
on  the  little  company.  Thus  did  God  set  his  seal 
upon  the  newly  wedded  couple. 

PRAISE. 

"Let  everything  that  hath  breath  praise  the 
Lord."  (Ps.  150:6.)  Volumes  have  been  written 
on  the  illustrious  author  of  this  text,  but  only  a  few 
have  even  a  small  conception  of  the  magnitude  of 
"The  Blessing"  that  caused  the  Psalmist's  lips  to 
break  forth  in  the  above  words.  If  every  living 
creature  could  use  its  breath  audibly  in  praising  Him 
"That  loved  us,  and  washed  us  from  our  sins  in  His 
own  blood,"  the  half  could  not  be  told.  If  the  strings 
of  ten  thousand  instruments  would  vibrate  in  har- 
mony with  the  heart  tuned  to  heaven's  music,  the 
half  could  not  be  told. 

The  Psalmist  calls  on  his  angels,  all  his  hosts 
and  the  sun,  moon  and  stars  to  praise  Him ;  and  "The 


266  LOOKING  BACK  FROM   BEULAH. 

heavens  of  heavens  and  the  waters  above  the 
heavens."  "Praise  Him  in  His  sanctuary;  praise 
Him  in  the  firmament  of  His  power."  There  is  noth- 
ing so  becoming  to  a  saint  as  praise.  He  who  has 
been  created  in  the  image  of  God,  a  little  lower  than 
the  angels  and  redeemed  from  sin  should  show  forth 
the  praises  of  Him,  "Who  hath  called  us  out  of 
darkness  into  His  marvelous  light,"  and  "Made  us 
heirs  of  God,  and  joint  heirs  with  Christ."  "Sing 
unto  the  Lord  a  new  song  and  His  praise  in  the  con- 
gregation of  saints."  Angels  can  never  join  in  the 
songs  of  the  redeemed.  This  privilege  belongeth 
alone  to  the  saints,"  who  have  washed  their  robes 
and  made  them  white  in  the  blood  of  the  Lamb."  O 
glory !  glory !  "Where  sin  abounded,  grace  did  much 
more  abound." 

"There  was  no  arm  to  save,  there  was  no  eye  to  pity, 
Until  Jesus  our  Savior  from  Glory  came  down; 

He  was  mighty  to  save,  He  was  strong  to  deliver, 
He  has  bro't  us  salvation,  a  robe  and  a  crown." 

"Hallelujah!    Hallelujah!    Sing  the  triumphant  strain; 
Hallelujah,  for  the  blood  and  the  Lamb  that  was  slain." 

He  stood  in  our  place  as  a  condemned  criminal 
before  the  bar  of  justice.  "The  chastisement  of  our 
peace  was  upon  Him;  and  with  His  stripes  we  are 
healed."  Though  hell  bound  and  hell  deserving  He 
broke  the  yoke  and  snapped  the  fetters  and  let  us  go 
free.  Should  we  not  use  every  faculty  of  our  being  to 
His  glory  and  praise  ? 

"What  shall  I  render  unto  the  Lord  for  all  of 
His  benefits?"  The  very  best  that  we  can  render  is 
small.  "Let  Israel  rejoice  in  Him  that  made  Him ; 


THE  BRIDEGROOM.  267 

let  the  children  of  Zion  rejoice  in  their  king-."  "Let 
them  praise  His  name  in  the  dance;  let  them  sing 
praises  unto  Him  with  the  timbrel  and  harp."  "For 
the  Lord  taketh  pleasure  in  His  people."  (Ps.  149: 
2-3-) 

THE  BRIDEGROOM. 

The  world  is  waxing  old  like  a  garment.  Satan 
has  had  it  clothed  in  mourning  and  groaning  under 
the  curse  for  the  past  six  thousand  years,  but  the 
time  has  come  for  the  saints  to  lift  up  their  heads  and 
rejoice  for  their  redemption  and  the  restoration  of 
all  things  draweth  near.  "The  voice  of  my  beloved ! 
behold,  He  cometh  leaping  upon  the  mountains,  skip- 
ping upon  the  hills."  "My  beloved  is  like  a  roe  or 
a  young  hart;  behold,  He  standeth  behind  our  wall,. 
He  looketh  forth  at  the  windows,  showing  Himself 
through  the  lattice."  "My  beloved  spake  and  said 
unto  me,  'Rise  up,  my  love,  my  fair  one,  and  come 
away"  (Cant.  2  :8-io.)  The  divine  spouse  will  soon 
come  down  on  a  white  cloud  to  take  His  bride  away. 
He  has  been  watching  her  from  the  lattice  work  of 
His  windows  as  she  toiled  in  His  vineyard  under 
the  scorching  rays  of  a  meridian  sun.  She  is  the  sun- 
burnt maiden,  who  has  captured  the  King  and  will 
sit  with  Him  on  the  throne  of  His  millennial  glory. 
He  has  heard  her  sighs  and  counted  her  tears  and 
looked  upon  her  in  pity  and  compassion  when  thorns 
were  pricking  her  feet  and  briars  were  tearing  her 
hands.  He  has  listened  to  the  scoffs  and  jeers  of  her 
persecutors  who  will  soon  receive  a  just  retribution. 
A.  great  loving  hand  has  reached  down  and  drawn 


268  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


the  cruel  arrows  from  her  heart,  wiped  away  the 
blood  drops  and  poured  in  a  soothing  balm.  Who 
shall  forbid  her  from  leaping  and  dancing  in  the  sun- 
shine of  His  presence  ?  Well  may  the  poet  sing  : 

"His  name  yields  the  richest  perfume, 
And  sweeter  than  music  His  voice: 

His  presence  disperses  my  gloom, 
And  makes  all  within  me  rejoice." 

"Content  with  beholding  His  face, 

My  all  to  His  pleasure  resigned: 
No  changes  of  season  or  place, 

Would  make  any  change  in  my  mind." 

It  matters  little  whether  we  please  or  displease 
others  so  the  smile  of  His  love-beaming  eye  is  upon 
us.  "The  winter  is  passed  —  the  flowers  appear  in  the 
earth  ;  the  time  of  the  singing  of  birds  is  come,  and 
•  the  voice  of  the  turtle  is  heard  in  our  land." 
(Cant.  2:11-12.)  Every  sanctified  heart  is  like  the 
spring  time  with  the  beautiful  flowers,  singing  birds, 
rippling  waters  and  cooing  doves.  This  experience 
is  a  miniature  millenium  within  itself.  The  Bride- 
groom comes  like  a  young  hart  skipping  over  the 
hills  and  then  like  a  dove  He  nestles  down  deep  in 
the  soul,  where  He  coos  over  His  beloved.  What  is 
swifter  than  the  roe  or  the  hart?  Some  bright  day, 
Jesus  will  come  over  the  eastern  hills,  swifter  than 
the  morning  light,  wrapped  in  the  fleecy  clouds  of 
His  glory.  The  bride  will  hear  His  voice  like  that  of 
a  dove  cooing  for  its  mate,  saying,  "rise  up,  my 
love,  my  fair  one,  and  come  away."  The  bars  of  the 
tomb  will  burst  ;  the  members  of  the  bride  both  dead 
and  living  will  be  changed  in  the  twinkling  of  an 
eye  and  fly  away  to  meet  Him  in  the  clouds.  He 


PREMIUJNNIAI,  JUDGEMENTS.  269 

will  bring  His  beloved  to  the  banqueting  house, 
where  His  banner  of  love  will  be  over  her.  "Let  us 
be  glad  and  rejoice,  and  give  honor  to  Him;  for  the 
marriage  of  the  Lamb  is  come,  and  His  wife  hath 
made  herself  ready.  And  to  her  was  granted  that 
she  should  be  arrayed  in  fine  linen,  clean  and  white; 
for  the  fine  linen  is  the  righteousness  of  saints." 
(Rev.  19:7-8.)  She  will  sit  down  in  His  shadow 
with  great  delight,  and  His  fruit  will  be  sweet  to 
the  taste.  -(Cant.  2:3.) 

PREMILLENNIAL  JUDGMENTS. 

While  the  orchestries  of  the  skies  are  playing 
their  rapturous  strains,  the  premillennial  judgments, 
which  the  bride  will  neither  see  nor  hear,  will  be 
sweeping  the  earth.  Myriads  of  the  ungodly,  left  in 
the  world,  clad  in  the  black  armory  of  death  and  de- 
spair and  marshalled  by  the  hosts  of  hell,  will  keep 
step  to  the  infernal  frenzy  of  the  lost.  Jesus  said, 
"Except  those  days  should  be  shortened  there  should 
no  flesh  be  saved ;  but  for  the  elect's  sake  those  days 
shall  be  shortened."  Then  "The  sun  shall  be  dark- 
ened, and  the  moon  shall  not  give  her  light  and  the 
stars  shall  fall  from  haven,  and  the  powers  of  the 
heavens  shall  be  shaken."  (Mat.  I4th  ch.)  Shall  we 
not  praise  Him  who  hath  made  it  possible  for  us  to 
escape  all  these  things  ?  The  ungodly  will  weep  and 
wail  and  gnash  their  teeth  and  cry  for  the  rocks  and 
hills  to  fall  on  them,  but  it  w7ill  be  too  late.  "And 
they  cast  dust  on  their  heads,  and  cried,  weeping  and 
wailing,  saying,  'Alas,  alas,  that  great  city,  wherein 
were  made  rich  all  that  had  ships  in  the  sea  by  reason 


270  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEUL,AH. 

of  her  costliness !  for  in  one  hour  is  she  made  desol- 
ate.' "  "Rejoice  over  her  thou  heaven,  and  ye  holy 
apostles  and  prophets ;  for  God  hath  avenged  you  on 
her.  *  *  And  the  light  of  a  candle  shall  shine  no 
more  at  all  in  thee ;  and  the  voice  of  the  bridegroom 
and  of  the  bride  shall  be  heard  no  more  at  all  in  thee ; 
for  thy  merchants  were  the  great  men  of  the  earth ; 
for  by  their  sorceries  were  all  nations  deceived.  And 
in  her  was  found  the  blood  of  prophets,  and  of  saints, 
and  of  all  that  were  slain  upon  the  earth"  (Rev. 
18:19-24.) 

While  the  marriage  supper  will  be  in  progress 
somewhere  in  the  firmament  another  supper  will  take 
place  in  the  earth.  An  angel  standing  in  the  sun, 
will  cry  with  a  loud  voice,  saying  to  all  the  fowls 
that  fly  in  the  midst  of  heaven,  "Come  and  gather 
yourselves  together  unto  the  supper  of  the  great 
God ;  that  ye  may  eat  the  flesh  of  kings,  and  the  flesh 
of  captains,  and  the  flesh  of  mighty  men,  and  the 
flesh  of  horses,  and  of  them  that  sit  on  them,  and  the 
flesh  of  all  men,  both  free  and  bond,  both  small  and 
great"  (Rev.  19:17-18.)  Here  is  a  most  horrific 
picture  of  the  tribulation  wars.  The  world  is  so  cor- 
rupt now  that  it  is  almost  impossible  to  live  in  it. 
What  will  it  be  when  the  voice  of  the  Bride  and 
Bridegroom  is  no  longer  heard  in  it,  and  these  fowls 
which  typify  devils — the  black  vultures  from  the  pit 
are  filling  their  foul  stomachs  with  the  flesh  of 
humanity.  One  will  surely  have  to  suffer  a  martyr's 
death  if  he  escapes  hell  then  and  gains  heaven.  If 
the  chilling  winds  of  carnality  have  such  deadening 
influence  on  a  soul  now,  how  will  it  be  when  this  car- 


OUR  COMING  KING. 


nival  of  the  pit,  is  in  full  blast.  How  unspeakable 
should  be  our  joy  when  we  think  of  the  possibility 
of  escaping  the  latter  and  sitting  down  at  the  mar- 
riage supper  of  the  Lamb. 

This  earth  is  the  purchased  possession  of  the 
Son  of  God,  who  carries  the  title  deed  to  it,  but  ever 
since  the  king  of  darkness  came  from  the  charred 
walls  of  his  pandimonium  and  placed  his  cloven  hoof 
on  its  virgin  soil,  it  has  been  in  rebellion  against  God. 
The  first  king  and  queen  were  captured  in  the  gar- 
den of  Eden,  and  a  generation  of  murderers  were 
brought  forth,  but  rest  assured  that  the  recording 
angel  with  pen  dipped  in  the  blood  of  the  world's 
Redeemer  has  kept  an  account  of  every  dark  deed 
which  will  be  brought  to  light  and  receive  a  just 
recompense.  The  long  dark  night  of  sin  is  fast  com- 
ing to  to  a  crisis  when  the  discordant  voices  from  re- 
bellious hearts,  corrupt  human  governments  and 
apostate  churches  will  be  forever  silenced.  The  time- 
honored  empires  and  kingdoms  will  crumble  and  fall 
and  the  crowns  will  be  snatched  from  the  heads  of 
their  incumbents.  The  blood  of  the  martyrs  will  be 
avenged,  and  their  murderers  assigned  to  the  vaults 
of  eternal  separation,  and  the  black  catalogue  of 
crime  forever  wiped  out,  no  more  to  stain  the  fair 
pages  of  the  world's  record. 

OUR  COMING  KING. 

•  Then  will  be  fulfilled  Zechariah's  (14:4)  proph- 
ecy, "And  His  feet  shall  stand  in  that  day  upon  the 
Mount  of  Olives,  which  is  before  Jerusalem."  John 
said,  "I  looked,  and,  lo,  a  Lamb  stood  on  the  Mount 


2/2  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

Zion,  and  with  Him  an  hundred  and  forty  and  four 
thousand,  and  they  sung  as  it  were  a  new  song  before 
the  throne,  and  no  man  could  learn  that  song,  but  the 
hundred  and  forty  and  four  thousand,  which  were 
redeemed  from  the  earth"  (Rev.  14:1-3.)  This 
company  represents  Jesus,  and  the  Bride  who  flew 
up  to  meet  Him  in  the  clouds,  and  is  now  returning 
with  her  divine  Spouse  from  the  banqueting  cham- 
ber, where  the  nuptials  have  been  celebrated.  She  is 
"the  holy  city,  the  new  Jerusalem,  coming  down  from 
God  out  of  .heaven,  prepared  as  a  bride  adorned  for 
her  husband"  (Rev.  21:1.) 

Paul  speaks  of  a  resurrection  that  is  out  from 
the  dead  (Phil.  3:10),  to  which  he  was  striving  to 
attain.  This  takes  place  at  the  beginning  of  the 
premillennial  judgments,  when  the  living  and  dead 
saints  are  translated.  "These  are  they  which  were 
not  defiled  with  women."  The  fallen  church  is  rep- 
resented in  the  Bible  by  a  woman  who  has  broken 
wedlock.  The  one  hundred  and  forty  and  four  thou- 
sand were  not  defiled  by  her.  "These  are  they  which 
follow  the  Lamb  withersoever  He  goeth.  These  were 
redeemed  from  among  men,  being  the  first  fruits 
unto  God  and  to  the  Lamb."  Many  deceived  per- 
sons think  they  can  affiliate  with  backslidden 
churches,  that  have  long  since  broken  spiritual  wed- 
lock and  married  the  world,  and  still  belong  to  the 
bridehood.  This  is  a  delusion  of  the  devil.  It  is  un- 
reasonable and  utterly  impossible  to  support  her  in- 
stitutions, walk  in  her  streets,  peer  in  at  her  windows 
and  drink  out  of  the  wine  cup  of  her  fornications 
without  being  contaminated.  Yet  multitudes  are  do- 


CARNALITY DAMNATION.  2/3 

ing  this  and  vainly  imagining  that  they  are  the 
chosen  ones.  It  could  not  be  said  of  such,  "In  their 
mouth  was  found  no  guile,"  or  that  they  would  be 
found  without  fault  before  the  throne  of  God"  (Rev. 
I4thch.) 

When  the  first  king  and  queen  stepped  out  on 
this  newly  created  sphere,  there  was  no  spot  to  mar 
its  beauty ;  but  they  proved  unworthy  and  succeeded 
in  wresting  it  from  its  spiritual  orbit,  and  plunging  it 
and  their  own  posterity  into  a  long  black  night,  with 
deeds  too  dark  to  be  depicted  on  the  screens  of  time. 
Adam,  the  first,  was  a  failure,  but  Adam  the  second 
has  stepped  to  the  front  as  the  world's  Redeemer. 
He  will  capture  His  Bride;  slay  His  antagonist  and 
sit  down  with  her  on  His  father  David's  throne  and 
rule  the  world  in  righteousness.  "And  it  shall  be  in 
that  day,  that  living  waters  shall  go  out  from  Jerusa- 
lem; half  of  them  toward  the  former  sea,  and  half 
of  them  toward  the  hinder  sea;  *  *  and  the 
Lord  shall  be  king  over  all  the  earth;  in  that  day 
shall  there  be  one  Lord,  and  His  name  one."  (Zee. 
14:8-9-) 

CARNALITY  AND  ITS  DAMNATION. 

"My  mother's  children  were  angry  with  me; 
they  made  me  the  keeper  of  the  vineyards ;  mine  own 
vineyard  have  I  not  kept"  (Cant.  1:6).  "Hearken, 
O  daughter — forget  also  thine  own  people,  and  thy 
father's  house"  (Ps.  45:10.) 

Of  necessity  the  bride  of  Christ  is  pressed  into 
fields  of  labor  that  she  never  would  have  had  to  enter 
if  her  mother's  (church's)  children  had  kept  the 


2/4  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

faith  and  helped  to  bear  the  burden  and  heat  of  the 
day.  They  are  looking  after  their  worldly  interests 
and  commending  themselves  with  works  of  self- 
righteousness,  they  feel  no  need  of  the  sanctifying 
blood  of  the  Lamb.  At  the  same  time  jealousies 
arise  when  their  sacrifices  are  fireless  and  rejected. 
They  are  not  righteous  and  like  Cain  they  would  kill 
their  brother.  It  is  a  carnality  diametrically  opposed 
to  holiness.  What  a  monster !  It  is  fallen  Adam  as 
a  fugitive  in  a  pugilistic  attitude,  with  wrinkled  brow 
and  darkened  countenance,  firmly  set  teeth,  clinched 
fists  and  hardened  muscles.  He  came  from  the 
regions  of  night,  forced  his  way  into  the  fair  garden 
of  the  soul  and  fouled  the  lilies  of  purity  under  his 
feet.  Here  he  has  barred  the  doors  and  reigns  su- 
preme. His  only  conqueror  is  Adam  the  second 
(Christ)  who,  by  your  yielding  to  him,  will  enter  the 
gateway  of  your  soul  and  search  him  out  in  the  se- 
cret chambers  and  "bind  the  strong  man  and  spoil  his 
goods"  (Mat.  12:29.).  These  goods  are  the  works 
of  the  flesh:  are  adultery,  uncleanness,  fornication, 
lasciviousness,  idolatry,  witchcrafts  hatred,  wrath, 
strife,  seditions,  heresies,  envyings,  murders,  drunk- 
enness, revelings,  etc.,  etc.  Cain,  a  true  representa- 
tive of  the  flesh,  brought  an  offering  without  blood 
and  was  not  accepted.  Abel,  emblematizing  the  new 
man,  brought  the  sacrificial  lamb  and  the  fire  from 
heaven  consumed  his  offering.  "Without  the  shed- 
ding of  blood  is  no  remission"  of  sins. 

Carnal  religion  has  no  blood  in  it,  therefore  its 
ambassadors  are  enemies  to  the  cross  of  Christ. 
Isaac  was  the  child  of  promise.  Ishmael,  who  was 


CARNALITY DAMNATION.  2/5 

born  after  the  flesh,  persecuted  him  who  was 
born  after  the  Spirit,  even  so  it  is  now.  "For  the 
Spirit  lusteth  against  the  flesh  and  the  flesh  against 
the  Spirit  and  these  are  contrary  one  to  the  other" 
(Gal  5:17)  Sarah,  who  emblematizes  the  new 
church,  said  that  the  son  of  the  bond  woman  should 
not  be  heir  with  her  son.  Isaac  typifies  the  new  birth, 
Ishmael  the  old  man  of  depravity.  He  mocked  Isaac 
and  was  cast  out  on  the  weaning  day.  The  time  will 
come  in  the  experience  of  every  regenerated  person, 
when  Adam  the  first  must  die  or  the  result  will  be 
spiritual  death  to  those  who  retain  him  in  their  heart. 
Had  Ishmael  been  permitted  to  stay  he  would  have 
killed  Isaac.  Jacob  crossed  his  hands  and  blessed 
Ephriam,  the  youngest  son  of  Joseph.  Esau  sold  his 
birthright  and  Jacob  the  younger  obtained  the  in- 
heritance, then  Esau  sought  to  kill  Jacob.  Adam 
the  first  forfeited  his  rights  to  an  inheritance,  selling 
this  world  and  humanity  out  to  the  devil.  Adam 
the  second  redeeming  it  with  his  own  blood,  but  the 
son  of  Belial  firmly  intrenched  in  his  stronghold,  the 
human  heart,  refuses  to  retreat,  obstinately  contest- 
ing every  inch  of  the  ground,  until  rivers  of 
blood  have  flown  and  mountains  of  dead  have  been 
heaped  up.  Multiplied  millions  have  gone  down  un- 
der the  stroke  of  the  grim  monster  and  are  now 
writhing  in  the  flames  of  torment  where  they  will  be 
the  victims  of  torture  forever. 

The  bands  are  playing  funeral  notes.  Slowly 
moves  the  procession  behind  the  livery  draped  in 
black,  bearing  the  remains  of  the  departed  soul  to 
the  city  of  the  dead.  The  body  is  consigned  to  the 


2/6  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

earth  and  the  minister  repeats  "earth  to  earth  and 
dust  to  dust."  Flowers  are  placed  upon  the  coffin 
lid,  a  few  words  of  consolation  are  spoken  to  the 
friends  in  mourning. 

In  the  meantime  the  spiritual  eye  pierces  the 
blackness  of  night  and  in  the  citadel  of  the  pandimon- 
ium,  sees  a  lost  soul  just  entering  the  realities  of  a 
burning  hell.  Ten  thousand  demons  in  their  frenzy 
torture  him  with  coals  of  fire  and  red  hot  branding 
irons.  He  shrieks  and  groans  in  vain  trying  to  re- 
lease himself  from  his  tormentors,  but  it  is  too  late. 
He  refused  to  let  old  "Adam"  die  in  spite  of  the  ad- 
monition "to  put  off  the  old  man  with  his  deeds."  He 
clung  to  him  to  the  end,  now  like  a  lump  of  lead  he 
has  sunk  into  the  pit  of  despair  to  breathe  the  foul 
pestilential  breath  of  tobacco  chewers,  drunkards, 
harlots,  murderers,  suicides,  etc.  There  is  no  re- 
pentance in  liell !  It  is  too  late !  Mercy  was  rejected, 
and  the  die  cast!  The  door  is  forever  closed,  and 
the  soul  is  left  in  hopeless  remorse  to  writhe  in  the 
flames  of  torment  forever! 


CHAPTER  XXL 

ON  THE  PACIFIC  COAST TOKENS  OF  GOD'S  FAVOR 

ORGANIZATION  OF  PENTECOSTAL,  UNION. 

In  the  afternoon  of  October  3,  1901,  it  was 
made  clear  to  me  that  I  should  visit  the  Mission  at 
Cheyenne,  Wyo.,  and  in  less  than  two  hours  I  was 
off,  arriving  there  after  10  o'clock.  As  our  mis- 
sionaries had  moved  since  we  last  heard  from  them 
I  did  not  know  where  to  find  them.  I  made  a  few 
inquiries  of  persons  who  were  unable  to  give  me  any 
information  in  regard  to  them.  The  weather  was 
cold  and  damp  and  I  was  getting  chilly  in  the  night 
air,  when  I  paused  and  asked  the  Lord  to  direct  my 
steps.  Strange  as  it  may  seem,  I  turned  and  went  in 
an  opposite  direction  and  walked  straight  to  the 
Mission  hall.  A  little  newsboy  pointed  the  building 
out  to  me  when  I  was  a  short  distance  from  it.  The 
Lord  blessed  this  visit  to  the  salvation  of  sinners  and 
the  sanctification  of  believers. 

I  was  alone  in  prayer  about  three  days  after  my 
arrival  there,  when  suddenly  the  artesian  well  began 
to  overflow  in  my  heart.  With  it  came  the  evidence 
that  the  Lord  had  planned  an  evangelistic  trip  for  me 
by  way  of  the  northwest  to  the  coast.  I  believed 
that  I  was  to  spend  two  weeks  in  Butte  City  on  my 
way.  We  had  paid  the  rents  and  settled  the  bills  at  the 
Home  before  leaving  and  I  had  no  money  to  spend  on 


278  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

such  a  trip.  However,  it  was  clear  to  me  that  the 
money  would  be  on  hands  for  my  ticket.  I  was  so 
confident  of  this  that  I  told  Sister  Leach,  the  leader 
of  our  work  there.  Five  days  later  I  received  a 
postal  card  from  Brother  Peterson,  the  leader  of  our 
"Butte  Mission,  telling  me  that  he  had  sent  the  money 
to  Denver  for  rny  fare  to  Butte.  He  knew  nothing 
of  my  leading  and  no  one  had  said  a  word  to  him 
about  the  money  for  my  fare. 

I  returned  to  Denver  and  started  on  the  i6th 
for  Montana,  arriving  at  Butte  two  days  later.  I 
found  the  Mission  in  a  prosperous  condition.  The 
Lord  wonderfully  blessed  my  labors  during  the  next 
two  weeks.  I  said  nothing  to  any  one  about  going 
further,  and  was  wondering  how  the  way  was  going 
to  be  opened,  when  one  day  Sister  Peterson  came  in 
with  a  smile  and  asked  me  how  I  would  like  to  go 
to  California.  I  told  her  I  would  be  pleased  to  go  if 
it  were  the  Lord's  will.  She  came  back  later  and 
told  me  her  husband  would  buy  my  ticket  if  I  would 
go,  and  in  the  meantime  decided  that  she  and  little 
Alma,  her  three-months-old  babe,  would  accompany 
me. 

I  had  long  wanted  a  trip  on  the  ocean,  and  God 
had  promised  me  that  I  should  have  it,  but  supposing 
that  I  would  not  be  able  to  get  my  usual  half-rate 
fare  this  way,  I  said  nothing  about  it.  A  few  hours 
before  we  were  to  leave,  Brother  Peterson  came  in 
and  asked  me  how  I  would  like  to  go  from  Portland, 
Oregon,  to  San  Francisco  on  an  ocean  steamer.  T 
told  him  I  would  be  delighted  with  such  a  trip.  He 
went  back  to  the  ticket  office  and  telegraphed  to  Port- 


PACIFIC  COAST.  279 

land  and  secured  clergy  rates  and  received  an  an- 
swer just  in  time  for  us  to  take  the  train  via  Poca- 
tello,  Idaho. 

Before  leaving  Butte  the  saints  put  enough 
money  in  my  hands  to  pay  my  expenses  on  this  trip, 
some  of  which  was  not  given  me  until  I  was  on  the 
train  seventy  miles  south,  whefe  I  found  my  sister 
and  her  four  children  on  the  platform  waiting  to  see 
me.  Little  Dale,  her  six-year-old  boy,  had  broken 
his  arm  a  few  days  before,  but  came  lugging  a  bas- 
ket of  lunch  with  the  other  for  me.  This  was  a 
touching  scene  and  brought  tears  to  my  eyes,  as  I 
felt  it  was  a  token  from  God  that  He  would  supply 
all  my  needs  on  this  trip.  As  the  train  was  just  pull- 
ing out  a  brother  handed  me  four  silver  dollars. 

A  morning  or  two  later  we  were  running  along 
by  the  beautiful  Columbia  river  within  a  hundred 
miles  of  Portland.  The  mountain  scenery  along  this 
river  beggars  description,  and  the  luxuriant  vegetable 
growth  added  to  its  charm.  My  soul  was  full  of 
music,  and  I  felt  like  vying  with  the  bird  of  a  May 
morning  that  almost  splits  its  throat  to  do  justice  to 
its  surroundings. 

Before  reaching  Portland,  Sister  Peterson  and 
the  baby  were  both  quite  sick  caused  by  the  motion 
of  the  train.  We  knew  no  one  in  this  city,  but  I 
asked  the  Lord  to  have  some  of  the  saints  meet  us 
there.  The  assurance  came  to  my  heart  that  He 
would  answer  the  prayer.  When  we  stepped  off  the 
train,  I  looked  around,  but  saw  no  one  I  felt  like 
speaking  to  but  a  policeman.  I  asked  him  about  the 
hotels,  telling  him  that  we  were  missionaries  and 


28O  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


wanted  a  nice  quiet  place  where  the  charges  would 
be  reasonable.  The  moment  I  said  this,  his  face 
lighted  up  and  he  asked  me  what  society  we  were 
working  for.  I  told  him  we  were  Pentecostal  folks. 
He  said,  "I  am  interested  in  the  Pentecostal  work 
myself."  We  found  him  to  be  a  Christian  man  who 
had  secured  his  office  through  Christian  influence. 
He  seemed  very  much  interested  in  us,  and  in  less 
than  twenty  minutes  had  put  us  on  a  street  car  and 
sent  us  to  his  quiet  little  home  in  the  outskirts  of 
the  city,  where  his  wife,  a  beautiful  Christian  lady, 
received  us  with  great  kindness.  He  was  off  duty 
at  noon,  and  had  previously  announced  a  holiness 
prayer  meeting  in  the  neighborhood  for  that  after- 
noon, which  I  was  asked  to  lead.  The  saints  were 
wonderfully-  blessed  as  the  Lord  poured  His  spirit  on 
me  in  giving  a  short  Bible  lesson.  At  the  close  of 
this  meeting  we  had  more  friends  than  we  had  made 
in  some  places  in  a  year,  when  we  had  less  salvation. 
Their  homes  were  open  to  us  and  it  seemed  they 
could  not  do  enough  for  us.  A  Free  Methodist 
preacher  who  was  present  asked  me  to  talk  in  his 
church  the  next  evening,  where  we  had  a  real  spiritual 
feast.  At  the  close  of  the  service  against  my  protest 
the  pastor  insisted  on  taking  an  offering  for  me. 
When  some  of  them  bade  us  good-bye  the  next  even- 
ing on  the  steamer  it  was  like  parting  with  friends 
we  had  known  for  years.  Considering  God's  deal- 
ings with  us  during  our  three  days'  stay  in  this  city, 
it  will  ever  be  one  of  the  bright  spots  cherished  in 
our  memory. 

As  our  steamer,  the  "Columbia,"  was  loosened 


PACIFIC  COAST.  t  28l 

from  the  dock  and  moved  slowly  out  in  the  river,  my 
thoughts  turned  toward  home  and  loved  ones  and 
the  possibility  of  never  meeting  them  again,  yet  I  felt 
as  secure  as  the  little  bird  in  the  cleft  of  the  rock.  We 
reached  Astoria  about  4  a.  m.  the  next  morning, 
where  our  ship  lay  in  port  until  8  p.  m.  waiting  for 
daylight  and  high  tide  before  attempting  to  cross  the 
bar  at  the  mouth  of  the  river.  Here  as  I  stepped  out 
on  deck  my  eyes  beheld  the  wonders  of  God  and  His 
handiwork  that  would  simply  exhaust  the  descriptive 
powers  of  the  most  gifted  writer.  The  mouth  of  the 
river  dotted  all  over  with  vessels  of  every  description, 
lying  at  anchor  and  plying  the  waters  amidst  flying 
sea  birds,  with  the  beautiful  mountain  scenery  on 
either  side  and  in  full  view  of  the  great  Pacific, 
made  a  picture  never  to  be  effaced  from  memory. 
As  the  great  waves  broke  against  our  vessel  when 
we  were  crossing  the  bar,  I  thought  of  the  stream  of 
life  on  which  I  had  sailed  for  fifteen  years  after  my 
conversion,  before  crossing  the  turbulent  waters  of 
consecration  and  sailing  out  into  the  great  ocean  of 
God's  love  where  its  height,  depth  and  breadth  can 
not  be  measured. 

I  remembered  that  the  Psalmist  said,  "They 
that  go  down  to  the  sea  in  ships,  that  do  business 
in  great  waters ;  these  see  the  works  of  the  Lord,  and 
His  wonders  in  the  deep.  For  He  commandeth  and 
raiseth  up  the  stormy  wind  which  lifteth  up  the 
waves  thereof.  They  mount  up  to  the  heaven ;  they 
go  down  again  to  the  depths;  their  soul  is  melted  be- 
cause of  trouble.  They  reel  to  and  fro,  and  stagger 
like  a  drunken  man,  and  are  at  their  wits  end." 


282  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

(Ps.  107:23-27.)  The  above  picture  was  actually 
before  my  eyes.  I  was  seeing  the  wonders  of  the 
Lord  and  His  works  in  the  deep,  which  was  veri- 
fied spiritually  in  my  Christian  experience  nine  years 
before  when  the  Lord  sanctified  my  soul  and  truly 
it  can  be  said,  I  have  been  doing  business  in  great 
waters  ever  since. 

The  stormy  waves  lifted  our  vessel  up  to  the 
heavens,  then  she  would  go  down  again  into  the 
depths.  In  less  than  half  an  hour  three-fourths  of 
the  passengers  were  seasick  and  reeling  to  and  fro. 
like  drunken  men.  I  had  prayed  that  the  Lord  would 
not  let  my  trip  be  spoiled  by  sea  sickness,  and  re- 
ceived the  evidence  that  I  should  have  the  desire  of 
my  heart,  and  while  others  were  lying  prostrated 
on  their  beds  in  their  state  rooms  dreadfully  nause- 
ated, requiring  the  assistance  of  the  servants  on 
board,  I  was  perfectly  enraptured  with  the  wonders 
of  the  ocean.  In  the  afternoon  I  began  to  feel 
some  of  the  symptoms  of  sea  sickness,  enough  to 
convince  me  that  I  would  be  no  better  than  the  rest 
if  my  trust  were  not  in  God.  I  went  down  to  the 
supper  table  but  could  eat  no  food.  The  waiters 
looked  at  each  other  and  smiled  as  much  as  to  say, 
"she  will  not  be  down  again."  Some  of  them  had 
been  remarking  how  I  had  kept  up  while  others 
were  so  sick.  I  told  them  my  trust  was  in  Jesus. 
I  was  conscious  of  the  victory,  the  enemy  thought 
he  had  gained,  and  went  to  my  room  and  asked  the 
Lord  just  for  His  glory  to  keep  me  well.  In  less 
than  ten  minutes  every  symptom  of  sea  sickness  was 


PACIFIC  COAST.  283 

gone  and  I  was  troubled  no  more  during  the  rest  of 
the  journey. 

About  3  A.  M.  on  the  third  morning  after  our 
embarkation  we  were  Hearing  the  "Golden  Gate" 
of  the  great  metropolitan  city.  The  lights  were 
glimmering  along  the  shore  and  there  was  no  fog 
to  hinder  our  immediate  entrance.  I  arose  and 
dressed  long  before  the  break  of  day  and  sat  looking 
out  at  the  window  while  Sister  Peterson  and  little 
Alma  slept.  A  view  of  San  Francisco,  a  city  of  four 
hundred  thousand  people,  lighted  with  electricity, 
made  a  beautiful  picture.  I  thought  of  the  city  which 
hath  foundations  whose  builder  and  maker  is  God 
and  here  amidst  the  roaring  waves  a  revelation  of 
God's  glory  that  is  to  be  revealed  at  the  end  of  life's 
journey  overwhelmed  me. 

When  the  old  ship  Zion  has  made  her  last  trip, 

I  want  to  be  there,  I  do; 
With  heads  all  uncovered  to  greet  the  old  ship, 

I  want  to  be  there,  don't  you? 
When  all  the  ship's  company  meet  on  the  strand, 

I  want  to  be  there,  I  do; 
With  songs  on  their  lips  and  with  harps  in  their  hands, 

I  want  to  be  there,  don't  you? 

When  Jesus  is  crowned  the  king  of  all  kings, 

I  want  to  be  there,  I  do; 
With  shouting  and  clapping  till  all  heaven  rings, 

I  want  to  be  there,  don't  you? 
Hallelujah  we'll  shout  again  and  again, 

I  want  to  be  there,  I  do; 
And  close  with  the  chorus,  Amen  and  Amen, 

I  want  to  be  there,  don't  you? 

We  disembarked  at  seven  A.  M.  and  in  a  few 
hours  had  crossed  the  bay  and  were  located  in  the 
home  of  one  of  God's  saints  in  Oakland.  Here  we 


284       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

stayed  three  days  before  leaving  for  San  Jose,  the 
former  home  of  Sister  Peterson.  This  place  is  said 
to  be  the  garden  spot  as  well  as  the  Gomorrah  of 
the  coast.  I  certainly  could  not  do  justice  in  trying 
to  give  the  reader  even  a  slight  idea  of  the  beauty 
of  this  almost  tropical  city,  with  its  various  palm 
trees,  flowers  and  fruits  that  met  my  vision  in  every 
direction.  The  roses  and  calla  lilies  that  are  favor- 
ites of  most  everyone,  grew  in  such  profusion  that 
I  was  reminded  of  the  little  girl,  who  had  been 
crowded  and  stinted  in  a  tenement  house  of  a  big 
city.  She  was  taken  to  see  the  ocean,  when  she  said, 
"O  mamma,  I  am  so  glad  there  is  enough  of  some- 
thing." 

MEETING  AT  SAN  JOSE,   CALIFORNIA. 

On  Friday  afternoon,  Sister, Peterson  and  my- 
self were  walking  up  one  of  the  main  streets  of 
the  city  in  the  direction  of  the  Christian  Alliance 
hall,  where  we  were  expecting  to  attend  a  meeting, 
when  I  caught  the  eye  of  an  old  man  who  had  a 
pop  corn  and  candy  stand  on  the  corner.  We  had 
only  gone  a  few  steps  when  he  came  running  after 
us  calling,  "Madam,  madam,  are  you  not  from  Colo- 
rado?" He  stood  trembling  with  excitement  as  he 
confronted  us.  I  told  him,  yes,  I  was  from  Denver. 
I  did  not  recognize  him  at  first.  He  said,  "I  know 
you,  but  I  can't  recall  your  name.  We  lived  near 
you  in  a  little  terrace  facing  the  alley.  My  wife 
attended  your  meetings.  She  was  taken  sick  and 
given  up  by  the  physician  and  you  prayed  with  her 
and  the  Lord  healed  her.  O  she  must  see  you.  She 


PACIFIC  COAST.  285 

will  be  delighted  to  know  you  are  here."  After  the 
close  of  the  meeting,  an  hour  and  a  half  later,  we 
were  again  walking  up  the  street  and  were  overtaken 
by  this  brother,  who  handed  me  a  dime,  begging  me 
to  take  a  street  car  to  his  home.  We  had  only  gone 
a  half  block  further  when  we  met  his  nineteen-year- 
old  son,  who  was  apparently  as  much  excited  as  the 
father.  He  said,  "You  are  going  to  see  mother  I 
know,  and  I  must  go  with  you ;  I  want  to  see  what 
she  will  do."  His  mother  was  almost  overwhelmed 
with  joy.  They  lived  in  a  large  rooming  house 
where  there  were  a  number  of  other  families,  among 
them  Rev.  T.  W.  Matthews  and  wife,  leaders  of  the 
Florence  Mission.  Sister  Matthews  was  called,  to 
whom  I  was  flatteringly  introduced.  Our  good  sis- 
ter told  her  that  I  was  the  greatest  preacher  in  Colo- 
rado, was  at  the  head  of  the  holiness  work  and  the 
president  of  the  Colorado  Holiness  Association.  I 
told  her  she  was  very  much  mistaken,  that  I  had 
never  been  the  president  of  the  Association.  She  af- 
firmed that  I  was,  as  she  had  been  to  the  camp  meet- 
ings and  seen  for  herself.  I  felt  that  I  was  being 
misrepresented  to  this  strange  lady,  and  if  an  oppor- 
tunity were  given  me  to  do  a  little  work  for  the 
Master  it  would  put  me  in  an  embarrassing  position. 
I  was  asked  to  talk  at  the  Mission  the  next  evening, 
which  opened  the  way  for  a  two  weeks'  revival 
meeting,  in  which  God  was  glorified  in  the  salvation 
of  many  precious  souls.  It  was  about  five  days  be- 
fore the  real  break  came,  but  after  that  the  house 
was  crowded  and  the  altar  was  filled  at  almost  every 
service.  On  Saturday  evening  the  power  fell  upon 


286  BOOKING  BACK  FROM  BIvULAH. 

the  people,  and  souls  were  liberated  with  mighty 
shouts  of  victory  which  brought  people  from  the 
streets  and  clerks  from  the  stores  for  blocks  around. 
They  filled  the  aisles  and  stood  looking  with  wonder 
on  the  scene  about  the  altar.  One  dear  old  saint, 
who  drove  in  from  Santa  Clara  every  evening,  had 
been  praying  for  months  for  a  revival  in  this  Mis- 
sion. When  the  outlook  was  the  least  encouraging 
he  would  say,  "Soon  the  cannon  balls  of  salvation 
will  be  rolling  up  and  down  these  streets."  Not  all 
have  the  gift  of  preaching,  but  everyone  can  pray, 
and  yet  there  are  only  a  few  persons  who  become 
mighty  instruments  in  prevailing  with  God  for  the 
salvation  of  souls.  We  need  more  prayers  and  less 
of  the  chaffy  preaching  that  is  stamped  with  the 
counterfeit  brand  of  holiness. 

I  bought  my  ticket  over  the  Coast  Line  and 
Santa  Fe  route  home,  spending  a  few  days  in  Los 
Angeles.  Here  I  met  Dr.  F.  E.  Yoakum,  before 
mentioned  in  this  book,  whose  miraculous  healing 
has  become  widely  known.  A  drunken  man  was 
driving  a  horse  furiously  down  the  street  and  the 
shaft  of  the  buggy  struck  the  doctor  in  the  back, 
breaking  two  of  his  ribs.  The  concussion  was  so 
great  and  the  wound  so  bad,  it  was  thought  he  would 
not  be  gotten  home  alive.  He  weighed  225  pounds 
and  was  reduced  to  100  pounds  through  months  of 
awful  suffering.  He  underwent  operations  and  suf- 
fered from  a  flow  of  puss  from  about  the  vital  or- 
gans, which  were  said  to  be  hopelessly  affected.  He 
was  left  for  dead  at  one  time  by  an  operating  sur- 
geon, and  during  his  sickness  a  large  number  of 


PENTECOSTAL,  UNION.  287 

physicians  said  he  would  never  recover.  But  the 
hand  of  God  touched  him,  and  in  ninety  days  he 
gained  ninety  pounds.  He  is  now  a  strong  and 
healthy  man.  Write  him  at  Highland  Park,  Los 
Angeles,  Cal.,  for  a  published  account  of  this  mod- 
ern miracle.  I  attended  one  of  his  meetings  and  had 
the  opportunity  of  speaking  on  divine  healing  and 
telling  of  the  wonderful  things  that  the  Lord  had 
done  for  me,  of  which  the  doctor  was  somewhat  ac- 
quainted. I  visited  my  sister,  Mrs.  West  Meade, 
whom  I  had  not  seen  for  a  number  of  years,  and  at- 
tended three  services  at  the  Nazarene  church,  where 
I  \vas  asked  to  give  a  message  on  Sunday  evening. 
This  was  followed  by  a  talk  from  C.  W.  Ruth  and 
the  altar  call  in  which  fourteen  persons  came  for- 
ward, among  them  my  sister.  This  church,  though 
simple  in  its  organization,  was  like  a  city  set  on  a 
hill,  wrhose  light  could  not  be  hid. 

I  reached  home  December  i2th,  after  an  ab- 
sence of  nearly  two  months.  I  had  seen  many  old- 
time  conversions  and  sanctifications,  and  had  traveled 
four  thousand  five  hundred  miles  by  sea  and  land. 

THE  ORGANIZATION  OF  THE  PENTECOSTAL,  UNION. 

That  the  time  had  come  to  organize  our  work, 
I  could  no  longer  doubt.  Any  delay  now  would 
simply  mean  to  get  in  the  way  of  the  Holy  Ghost. 
For  years  God's  word  had  been  hammering  in  pieces 
the  rock  and  much  of  the  opposition  to  our  inde- 
pendent movement;  still  there  were  difficulties  to 
face  that  none  but  God  could  help  us  through.  My 
husband  was  still  undecided  about  the  organization, 


288  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 


but  the  Lord  made  it  plain  to  me  that  He  wanted  a 
holiness  church  in  Denver,  where  the  people  could 
enjoy  their  spiritual  liberty,  and  if  we  did  not  obey 
His  voice  He  would  raise  up  some  one  else  to  go 
forward  with  the  work. 

The  problem  of  what  to  do  with  our  converts 
had  hung,  over  me  like  a  night-mare  for  seven  years. 
In  spite  of  all  our  efforts  to  make  church  homes  for 
them  in  our  missions,  where  the  most  of  them  were 
born,  they  were  drawn  away  into  backslidden 
churches,  where  they  soon  died  spiritually.  This 
caused  us  real  soul  travail  beyond  words  to  express, 
yet  there  was  so  much  darkness  on  the  church  ques- 
tion that  to  preach  about  it  meant  to  meet  a  regiment 
of  demons.-  Satan  has  his  strongest  fortifications 
right  at  this  -point.  Here  is  where  he  comes  as  an 
angel  of  light  and  is  deceiving  the  people  by  the  mul- 
titudes. One  must  have  the  martyr  spirit,  be  will- 
ing to  run  the  gauntlet  and  become  a  target  for 
arch  fiends,  if  he  breaks  through  the  enemies'  breast 
works  and  plants  the  banner  on  the  heights  of  holi- 
ness. 

We  organized  December  29th,  1901,  with  fifty 
charter  members.  Men  have  separated  themselves 
from  their  worldly  fraternities,  such  as  lodges, 
unions,  etc.,  and  have  taken  the  narrow  way.  We 
have  had  greater  persecution,  to  be  sure,  but  the 
blessing  of  the  Lord  has  been  upon  us  a  hundred 
fold  in  every  way.  Some  of  our  workers  have  been 
arrested  and  taken  before  the  chief  of  police,  but  in 
this  we  have  reasons  to  rejoice,  as  it  only  proves  that 
wre  are  in  the  apostolic  succession. 


THE)    GOODLY    LAND.  289 

THE   GOODLY   LAND. 

"Thou  shall  be  called  Hephzibah   (i.  e.  married)   and 
thy  land  Beulah  (i.  e.  my  delight)."     Isa.  62:4. 


"Though  nature's  strength  decay, 

And  earth  and  hell  withsand, 
To  Canaan's  bounds  I  urge  my  way, 

At  his  command; 
The  watery  deep  I  pass, 

With  Jesus  in  my  view; 
And  through  the  howling  wilderness 

My  way  pursue. 

"The  goodly  land  I  see, 

With  peace  and  plenty  blest; 
A  land  of  sacred  liberty, 

And  endless  rest. 
There  milk  and  honey  flow, 

And  oil  and  wine  abound; 
And  trees  of  life  forever  grow, 

With  mercy  crowned. 

"There  dwells  the  Lord  our  King, 

The  Lord  our  Righteousness, 
Triumphant  o'er  the  world  and  sin, 

The  Prince  of  peace; 
On  Zion's  sacred  height, 

His  kingdom  still  maintains: 
And,  glorious,  with  his  saints  in  light 

Forever  reigns. 

"He  keeps  his  own  secure; 

He  guards  them  by  his  side; 
Arrays  in  garments  white  and  pure 

His  spotless  bride; 
With  streams  of  sacred  bliss, 

With  groves  of  living  joys, 
With  all  the  fruits  of  paradise, 

He  still  supplies. 

"Before  the  great  Three  One 

They  all  exulting  stand, 
And  tell  the  wonders  he  hath  done 

Through  all  their  land: 
The  listening  spheres  attend, 

And  swell  the  growing  fame; 
And  sing,  in  songs  which  never  end, 

The  wondrous  name." 


ADDENDA. 

Sioux  CITY,  IOWA,  Aug.  15  to  27,  1902. 
We  were  called  here  by  Dr.  A.  L.  Day,  the 
leader  of  an  independent  mission,  and  began  meetings 
in  a  Gospel  tent,  corner  Fifth  and  Jackson  streets. 
The  congregation  the  first  evening  was  small,  but 
God  honored  His  word  by  sending  the  truth  home 
to  hearts,  and  bringing  the  people  out  to  the  service 
the  next  afternoon.  The  second  evening  the  tent  was 
filled.  My  brother,  C.  W.  Bridwell,  gave  the  mes- 
sage, which  was  followed  by  a  burning  exhortation 
on  the  apostacy  of  the  modern  churches.  Six  souls 
came  to  the  altar.  From  this  time  the  messages  were 
given  us  red  hot  from  the  skies,  the  sword  was  thrust 
in  to  the  very  core  of  ecclesiastical  corruption — 
back-slidden  holiness  movements  were  not  spared. 
From  the  standpoint  of  human  wisdom  everything 
would  have  gone  to  smash,  and  we  would  not  have 
had  an  audience  after  this,  but  we  were  determined  to 
declare  the  whole  counsel  of  God  regardless  of  con- 
sequences, if  we  had  to  walk  out  of  town.  But  the 
Holy  Ghost  was  at  the  head  of  the  battle  and  we 
sang,  "If  Jesus  leads  this  army,  we  will  outshine  the 
sun."  We  faced  the  foe  and  witnessed  his  inglorious 
defeat.  All  classes  of  people  thronged  the  tabernacle, 
hundreds  were  standing  on  the  outside  unable  to  get 
seats.  Business  men,  railroad  officials,  merchants, 
mechanics,  society  women  and  ministers  of  almost 
every  denomination,  attended  the  meetings.  We  did 

290  ' 


ADDENDA.  29 1 

not  expect  the  preachers  to  attend  these  services, 
more  than  once  at  least,  yet  they  continued  to  come. 
God's  spell  was  upon  them  and  they  were  compelled 
to  say  amen  to  the  truth.  Some  of  them  gave  us 
their  subscription  for  the  Pentecostal  Union  Herald 
and  asked  how  long  we  had  been  preaching  about  the 
fallen  condition  of  the  churches  as  we  are  now.  We 
told  them  we  had  been  preaching  this  way  ever  since 
the  Lord  opened  our  eyes  by  the  baptism  of  the  Holy 
Ghost  and  fire  as  a  second  work  of  grace,  nine  years 
ago. 

The  premillennial  coming  of  the  Lord  was 
preached  in  demonstration  and  power  of  the  Spirit. 
It  is  remarkable  how  His  seal  was  on  this  truth.  At 
the  request  of  the  leaders  we  continued  the  meeting 
two  days  longer.  The  results  in  this  meeting  were 
very  satisfactory.  There  were  a  number  of  interest- 
ing experiences,  one  of  an  old  man,  seventy-three 
years  old,  who  was  wonderfully  converted.  I  saw 
him  sitting  out  at  the  edge  of  the  tent,  and  went  after 
him  when  the  altar  services  were  nearly  over.  He 
came  in  and  sat  up  in  a  chair — too  badly  crippled  to 
kneel  down.  He  threwr  up  his  hands  and  prayed; 
then  when  the  light  came  he  cried,  "It  is  a  fine  bless- 
ing !  I  can  see  Jesus !  He  has  forgiven  me !  Take 
them  (my  sins)  all  Lord,  don't  leave  any!"  His 
testimony  brought  conviction  on  the  people. 


Our  next  engagement  was  at  Buffalo  Rock 
Park,  August  28  to  September  7.  The  first  day  a 
train  with  campers  arrived  from  Chicago.  Quite  a 
number  of  tents  were  soon  up  on  the  ground.  The 


2Q2  LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

meetings  from  beginning  to  end  were  full  of  victory. 
The  messages  came  in  power.  No  cut  and  dried  pro- 
gramme had  been  prepared.  The  Spirit  had  His 
way.  Frequently  one  not  expected  to  preach  would 
come  forward  with  a  flaming  message.  There  was 
no  conflictions  nor  unpleasantness  among  the  breth- 
ren. It  was  a  blessed  place  to  be;  yet,  the  probing 
and  heart  searching  in  this  meeting  was  deep.  The 
conditions  for  Pentecostal  victory  were  not  made 
easy.  Those  who  came  forward  to  the  altar  went 
through  an  old  time  dying  out  process.  No  idols 
were  spared,  and  seekers  were  exhorted  to  stay  at  the 
altar  until  the  fire  fell. 


ROCKFORD,  ILL.,  Oct.  2  to  12. 
"We  were  called  to  assist  in  this  convention  by 
the  Metropolitan  Church  Association  of  Chicago. 
Three  red  hot  meetings  were  held  daily  in  the  Men- 
delssohn Music  Hall,  a  large  building  in  the  center 
of  the  city.  At  the  night  services  the  building  was 
packed  and  people  stood  in  the  gallery.  The  Gospel 
was  preached  in  the  old  fashioned  way  with  Pente- 
costal results.  Seekers  cried  to  God  for  mercy ;  some 
wept  bitterly,  while  others  fell  over  on  the  floor  and 
groaned  for  deliverance.  The  "signs"  that  Jesus 
said  would  "follow"  were  manifest  in  these  meet- 
ings. 


KEWANEE,  ILL.,  Oct.  31  to  Nov.  9. 
(From  reports  of  the  meeting.} 
The  Kewanee  ten  days'  convention,  under  the 
leadership  of  Sister  Kent  White,   Brothers  J.   W. 


ADDENDA.  293 

Lee,  E.  L.  Harvey  and  D.  M.  Parson,  was  the  most 
wonderful  meeting  in  many  respects  that  we  ever  at- 
tended. It  had  long  been  a  subject  of  special  prayer, 
and  God  is  visiting  the  town  with  conviction,  and  a 
number  of  homes  with  salvation.  Kewanee  never 
witnessed  such  a  religious  demonstration  before. 
The  large  opera  house — boxes,  parquet  and  both  gal- 
leries— is  packed  to  its  utmost  capacity  with  many 
turned  away.  This  proves  conclusively  that  all  we 
need  to  draw  the  masses  to-day  is  the  Holy  Ghost. 
People  stand  and  listen  attentively  throughout  the 
entire  service.  There  is  no  sneering,  but  an  eager- 
ness to  catch  every  word.  The  Gospel  is  proving  to 
be  the  power  of  God  unto  the  salvation  and  sanctifi- 
cation  of  many  souls.  It  is  a  sight  to  see  the  bright, 
happy  faces,  and  the  unmistakable  evidences  of 
changed  lives — of  proud  hearts  humbled,  of  hard 
hearts  softened  under  the  influence  of  the  Spirit. 
Glory  to  God ! 

One  young  woman  with  a  very  hard  heart,  who 
had  opposed  the  work,  going  so  far  as  to   call    the 
workers  "dead  beats,"  got  under  deep  conviction. 
Her  life  could  be  summed  up  in  these  words : 
"She  lived  for  self,  she  thought  for  self, 

For  self  and  none  beside ; 
Just  as  if  Christ  had  never  lived, 

As  though  He  never  died." 

She  spent  much  money  on  her  clothes,  with  no 
thought  of  her  soul.  Early  in  the  convention  God 
powerfully  convicted  her,  and  the  proud  girl  could 
be  seen  down  at  the  altar  begging  for  mercy.  He 
did  have  mercy  and  saved  her,  afterward  sanctifying 


2Q4       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

her  wholly.  Then  came  the  question  of  her  finery. 
The  things  that  had  nearly  sent  her  soul  to  hell,  were 
not  fit  to  give  to  another,  and  as  God  had  used  the 
fires  of  the  Holy  Ghost  to  burn  the  love  of  them  out 
of  her  heart,  she  used  fire  in  which  a  sixteen  dollar 
hat,  a  thirty-five  dollar  silk  dress  and  several  other 
garments  were  reduced  to  ashes. 

Could  you  see  her  now  standing  in  street  meet- 
ings or  praying  with  souls  at  the  altar,  you  would 
see  a  living  miracle  to  the  saving  power  of  God. 

This  meeting  went  right  on  after  convention 
closed.  A.  G.  Garr  was  put  in  charge,  who  had  a 
packd  house  the  following  Sunday  night  and  seven 
souls  saved. 


DANVILLE,  ILL.,  Oct.  31  to  Nov.  9. 
(From  reports  of  the  meeting.') 
This  Convention  \vas  opened  in  a  small  build- 
ing, but  the  first  Sunday  was  moved  into  the  Ar- 
mory, the  largest  building  in  the  city.  Brother  W.  E. 
Shepard  preached  morning  and  afternoon.  Four  or 
five  souls  were  saved  at  each  service.  Sister  Kent 
White  preached  at  night  on  the  awful  spiritual 
famine  now  devastating  the  many  so-called  churches 
of  our  land.  The  congregation  was  dazed.  Some 
believed  the  report,  some  thought  it  overdrawn, 
while  others  grumbled.  God  sealed  the  truth  with 
conviction  and  buried  it  deep  in  the  hearts  of  many. 
The  city  became  greatly  stirred.  The  devil  and  his 
aides  were  greatly  perplexed.  At  nights  the  great 
building  was  alive  with  people,  filling  every  nook ; 
many  had  to  stand.  The  daily  papers  kept  the  serv- 


ADDENDA.  295 

ices  advertised,  and  people  came  in  from  the  towns 
and  country  around. 

The  street  meetings  drew  large  crowds.     The 
people  were  amused  and  amazed  at  Christians  with 
their  "cups  running  over."    They  flocked  around  us 
like  small  boys  at  a  circus,  as  we  sang  and  shouted 
and  danced  for  joy.    O  glory  to  God  ! 
Salvation  so  free,  so  full  and  so  fine, 
It  keepeth  me  happy  in  rain  or  in  shine; 
I'm  looking  for  Jesus  to  come  from  on  high, 
And  take  His  Bride  to  His  home  in  the  sky.  - 

On  the  closing  Sunday  a  Holiness  Church  was 
organized  to  conserve  the  work  and  protect  the 
lambs. 

We  are  going  to  Racine,  Wis.,  to-morrow  (D. 
V.)  with  victory  perched  upon  our  banners.  The 
war  eagle  is  screaming  and  Satan  is  howling.  Glory 
to  God^! 

(This  book  goes  to  press  at  the  time  of  the  Ra- 
cine meeting.  At  its  close  a  series  of  meetings  is 
planned  to  follow  in  New  England,  commencing  at 
Springfield,  Mass.,  Nov.  28th.) 


( Taken  from  the  Danville  Press. ) 
Hundreds  were  converted  to  the  Holiness  peo- 
ple's belief  during  their  meetings  and  it  is  sincerely 
regretted  by  those  who  were  saved  that  the  meetings 
were  not  continued  longer.  They  stirred  Danville 
up  to  a  religious  fervor  that  it  never  before  experi- 
enced and  the  result,  had  they  continued  their  meet- 
ings for  another  week,  would  have  certainly  been 
beneficial  to  the  sinners  of  Danville.  A  continuous 


296  IvOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

meeting  was  held  Sunday  and  many  converts  were 
added  to  the  already  large  list.  A  pledge  was  taken 
from  the  members  of  the  Eastern  Illinois  Holiness 
association,  already  in  Danville,  that  they  would 
sever  their  connection  with  that  association  and  unite 
with  the  Chicago  Holiness  people.  Many  took  the 
pledge  and  a  large  sum  of  money  was  subscribed  to- 
wards establishing  a  Holiness  church  in  this  city. 
The  last  meeting  was  held  Sunday  night,  and 
the  Armory  was  unable  to  seat  -one-third  of  the  peo- 
ple who  desired  to  attend.  It  is  estimated  that  fully 
five  thousand  people  came  to  attend  the  meeting. 
•  The  streets  about  the  Armory  were  crowded  with 
people  and  the  churches  were  almost  deserted.  *  * 

BREWERY  TO  BIBLE  SCHOOL. 

From  the  brewery  to  a  Bible  school  in  two  days 
is  the  remarkable  experience  of  a  Danville  youth, 
Charles  Hollingsworth,  the  fifteen-year-old  son  of 
Mrs.  Anna  Hollingsworth,  residing  at  No.  26  Clark 
street.  Mrs.  Kent  White  of  Denver,  Colo.,  one  of 
the  evangelists  who  conducted  the  meetings,  boarded 
at  the  home  of  Mrs.  Hollingsworth.  In  the  family 
of  the  latter  was  her  fifteen-year-old  son,  a  bright, 
manly  little  fellow,  who  was  compelled  to  give  up  his 
school  and  accept  a  position  at  the  brewery  to  help 
his  mother  support  the  family.  He  never  liked  the 
work,  but  made  a  fair  salary,  which  helped  his 
mother  considerably.  Mrs.  White  took  a  great  fancy 
to  the  boy  and  took  him  with  her  to-  the  meeting  on 
Friday  night.  On  the  following  morning  he  made 
a  remark  at  the  breakfast  table  that  led  the  evangelist 


3 


. 


a 

•• 


Co 


ADDENDA.  297 

to  inquire  where  he  was  employed.  He  replied  :  "At 
the  brewery." 

"What  do  you  do?" 

"Bottle  beer." 

The  good  woman  nearly  fainted  when  this  in- 
formation was  imparted  to  her,  and  straightway  fell 
to  her  knees  and  prayed  for  the  young  man.  That 
night  he  returned  home  and,  handing  his  mother  his 
week's  wages,  announced  that  he  had  given  up  his 
position.  Although  his  mother  sorely  needed  the 
money  that  her  son  made,  she  was  willing  to  give 
this  up,  and  was  thankful  that  her  son  had  given  up 
his  position.  Mrs.  White  prayed  and  fasted  all  that 
night  and  a  portion  of  Sunday,,  and  on  Sunday  night 
the  boy  told  his  mother  that  he  had  given  his  heart 
to  God.  On  Monday  morning,  a  short  time  before 
Mrs.  White  was  ready  to  depart  for  Chicago,  she 
told  Charley  that  she  could  not  leave  him  now  that 
he  had  consented  to  live  for  God,  and  after  a  hurried 
consultation  with  the  boy's  mother,  decided  to  take 
him  to  Chicago  and  enter  him  in  the  Metropolitan 
Holiness  Bible  school.  The  boy  was  overjoyed 
when  told  of  the  plans  and  left  with  the  evangelists 
for  Chicago.  He  was  placed  in  the  school  last  night, 
only  forty-eight  hours  after  the  time  he  was  em- 
ployed in  the  brewery,  an  experience  that  does  not 
fall  to  the  lot  of  every  young  man.  When  seen  by  i 
reporter  for  The  Press  last  night  Mrs.  Hollings- 
worth  stated  that  she  could  not  express  her  thanks  to 
Mrs.  Wliite  for  the  kindness  she  had  shown  her  son. 

The  boy  has  a  half-brother  in  the  ministry,  Rev. 
Hollingsworth,  of  Catlin.  Mrs.  Hollingsworth  said 


298  LOOKING  BACK  FROM 

that  she  was  a  member  of  a  church  in  this  city,  but 
that  the  pastor  never  talked  to  her  nor  her  children 
as  Mrs.  White  did,  and  no  member  of  the  church 
had  ever  called  upon  her  or  assisted  in  any  manner 
while  there  was  sickness  in  the  family.  Charley  will 
be  prepared  for  the  missionary  field. 


[APPENDIX.] 

THE    METHODIST    CHURCH— A    FALLEN 
PEOPLE. 

FROM  THE  HIGHEST  AUTHORITIES  OF  THE  CHURCH 
— PROPHECIES,  WARNINGS  AND  PRESENT  STATE. 

"In  1729  two  young  men  in  England,  reading 
the  Bible,  saw  they  could  not  be  saved  without  holi- 
ness, followed  after  it,  and  incited  others  so  to  do. 
In  1737  they  saw,  likewise,  that  men  are  jus- 
tified before  they  are  sanctified ;  but  still  holiness  was 
their  object.  God  then  thrust  them  out  to  raise  a 
holy  people." — Methodist  Discipline. 

In  1824  the  Bishops  said  in  their  pastoral  ad- 
dress, "Never  was  there  a  period  more  momentously 
interesting  to  our  church  than  the  present.  Do  we 
as  preachers,  feel  the  same  child-like  spirit  which 
so  eminently  marked  our  first  ministers?  Do  we 
come  to  the  people  in  the  fullness  of  the  blessing  of 
the  gospel  of  peace?  It  is  not  enough  merely  to 
preach  the  gospel  truth,  but  we  must  preach  a  full 
gospel  from  a  full  ieart  and  preach  it,  too,  in  the 
demonstration  of  the  Spirit  and  with  power.  And 
above  all,  do  we  insist  on  the  present  witness  of  the 
Spirit  and  entire  sanctification  through  faith  in 
Christ?  Are  we  striving  by  faith  and  obedience 

299 


3OO  LOOKING  BACK  FROM   BEULAH. 

to  elevate  our  hearts  and  lives  to  the  standard  of 
gospel  holiness ;  or  are  we  wishing  to  have  the  stand- 
ard lowered  to  our  unsanctified  natures?  In  short, 
are  we  contented  to  have  the  doctrine  of  Christian 
holiness  an  article  of  our  creed  only,  without  becom- 
ing experimentally  and  practically  acquainted  with 
it?  Or  are  we  pressing  after  it  as  the  prize  of  our 
high  calling  in  Christ  Jesus? 

"IF  METHODISTS  GIVE  UP  THE  DOC- 
TRINE OF  ENTIRE  SANCTIFICATION,  OR 
SUFFER  IT  TO  BECOME  A  DEAD  LETTER, 
WE  ARE  A  FALLEN  PEOPLE.  It  is  this  that 
lays  the  ax  at  the  root  of  the  Antonomian  tree  in  all 
its  forms  and  degrees  of  growth;  it  is  this  that  in- 
flames and  diffuses  life,  rouses  to  action,  prompts  to 
perseverance,-  and  urges  the  soul  forward  to  every 
holy  exercise  and  every  useful  work.  IF-  THE 
METHODISTS  LOSE  SIGHT  OF  THIS  DOC- 
TRINE THEY  WILL  FALL  BY  THEIR  OWN 
WEIGHT.  THEIR  SUCCESS  IN  GAINING 
NUMBERS  WILL  BE  THE  CAUSE  OF  THEIR 
DISSOLUTION.  HOLINESS  IS  THE  MAIN 
CORD  THAT  BINDS  US  TOGETHER.  RE- 
LAX THIS,  AND  YOU  LOSSEN  THE  WHOLE 
SYSTEM.  This  will  appear  more  evident  if  we 
call  to  mind  the  original  design  of  Methodism.  It 
was  to  raise  up  and  preserve  a  holy  people.  This 
was  the  principal  object  which  Mr.  Wesley,  who, 
under  God,  was  the  great  founder  of  our  order,  had 
in  view.  To  this  end  all  the  doctrines  believed  and 
preached  by  Methodists  tend.  Whoever  supposed, 
or  who  that  is  acquainted  with  the  case,  can  suppose 
NOTE. — Capitals  above  are  for  emphasis. 


METHODIST  CHURCH.  30! 

it  was  designed,  in  any  of  its  parts,  to  secure  the  ap- 
plause or  popularity  of  the  world,  or  numerical  in- 
crease of  worldly  or  impenitent  men?  Is  there  any 
provision  made  for  the  aggrandizement  of  our  min- 
isters, or  the  worldly-mindedness  of  our  members? 
None  whatever."  This  was  signed  by  Bishops  Mc- 
Kendree,  Redding,  George,  Soule  and  Roberts. 

These  forefathers  realized  wherein  the  power 
of  the  church  lay — in  her  great  doctrine  of  holiness. 
\Yhen  the  church  commenced  to  drift  away  from  it 
they  cried  out  in  alarm.  Eight  years  later  in  the 
General  Conference  of  1832,  they  said:  "Among 
primitive  Methodists,  the  experience  of  this  high  at- 
tainment may  be  said  to  have  been  common;  now  it 
is  rarely  met  with  among  us. .  Is  it  not  time  for  us, 
in  this  matter  at  least,  to  return  to  first  principals? 
Is  it  not  time  to  throw  off  the  reproach  of  inconsist- 
ency, with  which  we  are  charged  in  this  matter? 

CONFESSIONS  OF  THE  BISHOPS  IN    IQOO. 

Seventy  years  pass  away  and  the  question  is 
asked  everywhere,  "What  ails  the  church?"  The 
church  papers  declare  that  they  are  no  longer  a  re- 
vival church.  The  prophecy  of  the  Bishops  of  1824 
is  fulfilled.  It  is  a  known  fact  that  the  doctrine  of 
entire  sanctification  is  a  dead  letter  and  according 
to  her  own  words  the  church  is  a  fallen  people.  In 
1900  the  Bishops  called  for  a  week  of  fasting  and 
prayer  and  are  driven  to  make  the  following  con- 
fession :  "To-day  our.  Methodism  confronts  a  se- 
rious situation.  Our  statistics  for  the  last  year  show 
a  decrease  in  the  number  of  our  members.  Year 


3O2  BOOKING  BACK  FROM   BEULAH. 

before  last  our  advance  was  checked.  Last  year 
our  advance  column  has  been  forced  back  a  little. 
The  lost  ground  is  paved  with  the  dead.  And  there 
are  now,  unhappily,  many  Methodists  who  lack 
present  knowledge  of  the  New  Testament  Salvation. 
They  have  slipped  a  cog  in  their  experience,  and, 
like  many  old  families  who  have  to  date  back  to  some 
buried  ancestor  to  find  their  virtue  and  title  to  their 
nobility,  have  to  date  back  to  some  dead  experience 
to  find  their  assurance  and  title  to  spiritual  nobility. 
*  *  *  Let  us  not  deceive  ourselves.  This  de- 
cline in  our  membership  is  not  an  accident.  It  comes 
from  a  sufficient  cause.  That  cause  is  the  slipping 
cog  in  our  experience,  our  lack  of  spiritual  power. 

"The  heroes  who  starved  in  the  old  prison  pens 
had  many  signs  of  their  famine.  They  became  thin, 
raw  boned,  stoop-shouldered,  hollow-chested  and 
hollow-eyed.  Their  joints  were  stiff,  their  bones 
ached,  and  their  muscles  were  sore.  They  lost  all 
the  signs  of  youth.  These  were  not  distinct  diseases. 
They  were  only  symptoms  of  one  awful  disease — 
famine.  Suitable  and  sufficient  food  would  drive 
away  this  horrible  brood  of  ailments  and  restore 
youth  with  its  beauty  and  power.  So  it  may  be  in 
our  church  life.  We  have  one  dire  disease — spiritual 
famine — lack  of  the  witness  of  the  Spirit,  lack  of 
personal  experience,  lack  of  spiritual  power.  And 
the  symptoms  are  many  and  varied  but  the  disease 
is  one." 

We  all  knowr  that  this  is  but  moderately  put 
and  the  great  doctrine  of  sanctification  is  avoided 
altogether.  The  church  has  drifted  so  far  away 


METHODIST  CHURCH.  303 

from  it  that  it  is  not  even  named  by  the  Bishops  in 
1900.  Such  a  haven  is  now  a  hopeless  one.  It  is 
not  a  question  now  of  sanctification,  it  is  one  of  jus- 
tification. One  of  the  old  ministers  of  the  church 
lately  said  to  us  with  tears,  that  one  of  the  Bishops 
declared,  that  one-half  of  the  church  if  it  ever  had 
any  salvation  had  lost  it,  and  another  added,  "yes, 
two-thirds  of  it  is  unsaved."  This  is  coming  nearer 
to  the  truth  but  if  the  full  truth  were  known  it  would 
be  appalling.  Let  us  read  what  some  of  the  church 
papers  have  to  say.  Take  the  Western  Christian  Ad- 
vocate, in  its  issue  of  July  19,  1893.  The  editor, 
now  Bishop  David  Moore,  said : 

"The  great  trouble  with  us  to-day  is  that  the 
rescuing  of  imperiled  souls  is  our  last  and  least  con- 
cern. Many  of  our  congregations  are  conducted  on 
the  basis  of  social  clubs.  They  are  made  centers  of 
social  influence.  Membership  is  sought  in  order  to 
advance  one's  prospects  in  society,  business  or  pol- 
itics. Preachers  are  called  who  know  how  to 

Smooth  down  the  rugged  text  to  ears  polite, 
And  snugly  keep  damnation  out  of  sight. 

"The  Sunday  services  are  made  the  occasions  of 
displaying  the  elegancies  of  apparel  in  the  latest 
fashions.  Even  the  little  ones  are  tricked  out  as 
though  they  were  the  acolytes  of  pride.  If  the 
'Rules'  were  read,  it  is  to  comply  with  the  letter  of 
a  law  whose  spirit  has  long  since  fled.  Their  class 
books  are  filled  with  names  of  unconverted  men 
and  women.  Official  members  may  be  found  in  box, 
dress  circle,  and  parquet  of  opera  and  theater.  Com- 


304       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

municants  take  in  the  races,  and  give  and  attend 
card  parties  and  dances.  The  distinction  between 
inside  and  outside  is  so  obscure  that  men  smile  when 
asked  to  unite  with  the  Church,  and  sometimes  tell 
us  that  they  find  the  best  men  outside. 

"When  we  go  to  the  masses,  it  is  too  often  with 
such  ostentatious  condescension  that  self-respect 
drives  them  from  us. 

"And  yet  we  have  so  spread  out,  under  the  in- 
fluence of  the  rich  and  ungodly,  that  they  are  a  ne- 
cessity to  us.  The  enforcement  of  the  unmistakable 
letter  of  the  Discipline  for  a  single  year  would  cut 
our  membership  in  half,  bankrupt  our  Missionary 
Society,  close  our  fashionable  Churches,  paralyze 
our  connectional  interests,  and  leave  our  pastors  and 
Bishops  unpaid  and  in  distress.  But  the  fact  re- 
mains, that  one  of  two  things  must  happen — the  Dis- 
cipline must  purge  the  Church,  or  God's  'Holy 
Spirit  will  seek  other  organized  agencies.  The  ax 
is  laid  at  the  root  of  the  tree.  The  call  is  to  repent- 
ance. God's  work  must  be  done.  If  we  are  in  the 
way,  He  will  remove  us.  Our  spirit  needs  to  be 

"The  arms  of  love  that  compass  me, 
Would  all  mankind  embrace:" 

and  our  aim  to 

"Tell  to  sinners  'round 
What  a  dear  Savior  we  have  found; 
To  point  to  His  redeeming  blood, 
And  cry,  'Behold  the  way  to  God!'  " 

"Let  each  reader  begin  with  himself,  and  rest 
not  until  he  realizes  that  the  kingdom  of  God  is  set 


METHODIST   CHURCH.  305 

up  within  him.  We  have  need  to  be  in  greater  haste 
to  flee  for  refuge  than  had  the  poor  fireman  in  Chi- 
cago. 'He  that  hath  ears  to  hear,  let  him  hear.'  ' 

In  this  article  he  confessed  that  many  of  the 
congregations  are  but  social  clubs  and  that  to  enforce 
the  letter  of  the  Discipline — which  is  taken  for  Bible 
discipline — would  virtually  cut  the  church  to  pieces. 
This  is  a  fearful  arraignment  of  the  whole  church — 
bishops,  ministers  and  members.  .  It  is  the  truth 
and  how  can  they  escape  the  curse  of  God?  There 
is  no  effort  at  reformation.  How  can  they  escape 
the  judgments  of  God  ?  The  fact  is  that  the  church 
has  become  so  heavy  with  worldliness  and  corrup- 
tion that  she  has  no  power  of  reformation  in  her. 

We  quote  from  the  Epivorth  Herald,  the  organ 
of  the  young  people  of  the  church,  the  following 
lamentable  confession  from  its  editor : 

"What  is  the  Methodist  Episcopal  church  going 
to  do  about  the  inroads  of  fashionable  sins  among 
the  membership  of  her  city  churches?  The  trend 
toward  worldliness  is  appalling.  Theater  going  has 
become  common  among  Methodist  members.  Card 
playing  is  a  regular  amusement  in  hundreds  of  Meth- 
odist homes.  Our  "leading  people"  send  their  chil- 
dren to  dancing  schools.  Other  sinful  diversions  are 
indulged  in  without  apology.  Unless  something  is 
done,  and  done  quickly,  we  will  be  swamped  by  this 
tide  of  worldliness.  While  we  wink  at  worldliness 
and  utter  no  word  of  rebuke,  what  reason  have  we 
to  expect  the  widespread  revival  for  which  we  have 
been  praying?  .How  can  we  expect  tjhe  boys  and 
girls,  and  the  young  men  and  women  of  our  homes 


306       LOOKING  BACK  FROM  BEULAH. 

to  be  converted?  What  right  have  we  to  believe 
that  God  will  smite  our  communities  with  convic- 
tion? 

"If  these  things  are  right  and  doing  no  injury 
to  the  spiritual  life  of  our  people,  let  us  encourage 
them.  But  if  they  are  wrong,  and  are  clearly  ruin- 
ous to  vital  godliness,  then  why  should  not  our  bish- 
ops and  editors  and  ministers  thunder  against  them  ? 
Why  should  we  have  practically  one  code  of  ethics 
for  the  country,  and  another  for  the  city?  Why 
should  we  set  up  one  standard  for  our  poor  people 
and  another  for  the  rich  ?  The  spirit  of  compromise 
is  abroad  in  the  church.  It  is  the  devil's  most  subtle 
method  of  undermining  her  power.  We  must  stop 
this  temporizing  with  evil — this  yielding  of  one 
point  after  another  for  the  sake  of  pleasing  people 
who  want  to  serve  both  God  and  mammon.  We 
need  a  liberal  infusion  in  our  pulpits  of  the  sort  of 
moral  courage  which  made  the  fathers  terrors  to 
evil-doers  of  high  and  low  estate,  and  made  Meth- 
odism a  synonym  for  an  aggressive,  reformatory, 
spiritual,  consistent  Christianity." 

Such  confessions  might  be  multiplied  ad  infin- 
itum,  but  we  will  add  but  one  more  and  that  from 
a  prominent  man  outside  of  the  church.  Under  the 
caption,  "What  Methodists  Have  Done,"  The  Michi- 
gan Advocate  some  time  ago,  published  this  signifi- 
cant article : 

"Though  not  a  Methodist  himself,  the  late  Dr. 
Dale,  of  England,  was  a  grave  student  of  Metho- 
dism, and  a<great  admirer  of  many  of  our  doctrines 
and  usages.  In  1879,  he  preached  a  sermon  before 


METHODIST  CHURCH.  307 

the  Wesleyan  Conference  at  Birmingham,  which 
produced  a  profound  impression.  Among  other 
memorable  utterances,  he  declared  that  if  Methodism 
had  carried  out  its  doctrine  of  entire  sanctification 
in  public  as  well  as  in  private  life,  it  would  have  af- 
fected the  most  profound  and  beneficent  ethical  rev- 
olution modern  history  has  known,  then  adds  the 
editor  of  this  paper,  'It  seems  to  us  that  this  state- 
ment is  irrefutable." 

These  articles  speak  for  themselves  and  need 
no  further  comments.  They  are  self -condemnatory. 
At  the  judgment  there  will  be  two  voices  of  con- 
demnation heard  in  the  domain  of  lost  souls.  One 
will  be  the  voice  of  the  unsaved  as  they  pronounce 
judgment  upon  themselves,  the  other  will  be  the 
voice  of  God,  who  shall  say,  "I  tell  you,  I  know  you 
not  whence  ye  are;  depart  from  me,  all  ye  workers 
of  iniquity." 

(FINIS.) 


Standing  on  the  Rock. 


MHB.  KENT  WHIT*. 


1.  Stand  wh<  n  the  .-storms  of  doubt  as  -  sail,  Stand  when  you'-  loved  ones 
2  Woen  vh)  word  Hw  writes  upon  your  heart,  And  you  from  the  world  are 
S.  When  tne  cidej  of  sin  roll  at  your  feet,  And  vain  pouip  and  pride  on 
4.  Tis  the  precious  blood  that  saves  from  sin,  Onlv  by  the  blood  thro' the 

mm  .X 


n  — 

-if  earth  all  fail,  St  n  1  whan  ymr  fr  •  ds  in  Christ  are  few,  Stand  on  the 

ful-ly  set  a-part,  Tl>o'  fier  -  y  darts  are  hurled  at    you,  Sfcmd  on  the 

ev'ryaiieyoumeet,  False  prophets  rise  and  teachers,    "too,  Stand  on  the 

gate  we'll  enter  in,  Then  trust  His  word  as  'tis  given  von,  Stand  on  the 

~  M.    •    A.      '  A. 

Errr-: 


CHORVK. 


>TFTr 

Stand  in>f.          standing  on  the  Rock, 

Sliding  on  the  Rock, I'm  standing  on  the  Rock, 


Standing  on  th?  Rack  that   e'er  sha'l  rrnyo     Oh.  I'm  stand  . 

Oh,  I'm  standing  on  the  Rock,  yes,  I'm. 


standing  on     the  Rock,'  Standing  on  the  Rock  that  ne'er  si  ail  move 

-* — • — P — • — f rf — f- 


.  by  Mr.    Kent  Wlnle 


Front  page  of  August  number.    JA  monthly  paper  with  no  advertisements. 


ALMA  WHITE,  Editor.  50c  a  year.    With  "Looking  Back 

KENT  WHITE,  Asso.  Ed.  and  Pub.      AUGUST,   1  9O2  from  Beulah"  $1.25. 


The  Mount  of  the  Holy  Cross,  (elevation  14,176  feet)  one  of  the  highest  mountains  in  Colo- 
rado, hangs  out  upon  its  great  dark  form  a  snow  white  banner  of  the  Christian  faith.  It  is 
formed  by  two  transverse  mountain  gulches  of  great  depth,  in  whose  rocky  embrace  lies 
embedded  the  eternal  snow.  All  that  gaze  upon  this  "sign  set  in  the  heavens"  are  filled 
with  wonder  and  awe.  It  brings  before  the  devout  Christian  the  atoning  blood  that  wash- 
es whiter  than  snow  and  faith's  vision  that  grasps  the  final  triumph  over  evil  of  the  Man  of 
Calvary — of  whose  Kingdom  and  peace  there  shall  be  no  end. 


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